scottishjohn

Also, at the Fuji? signed place, opposite Centara/Duangtawan (spelling) hotel, you can print, and access the net, USB's etc.

That's the one I meant above, just could not remember the name.

By Night Market I assume you mean Night Bazzar, if so;

Walk out the back of the night bazzar, turn left and on the right hand corner of Loi Kroi is an Internet Cafe. There is another on the left hand side of Loi Kroi about half way up just before the new 'welcome inn' ex 'Olde Bell'.

All the international TV stations are shut down. Is the Internet next?

No. Can't shut down the internet, It would affect the economy, banking and also the army. No way they have intentions to shut it down.

Not quite right. The 'INTERNET' as you mention it is an all embracing term covering all forms of 'computer' connections etc. Any goverment or ISP can block, or allow, any service as they see fit. This means that social internet can be blocked but commercial connections (banking etc) can still be maintained.

Is this US or UK 'Chips' under discussion?

Are we talking about 'chips' as in 'Fish & Chips' or 'Crisps' as in 'Salt & Vinegar' (UK)

If UK there are diffferent 'tatties' & different methods of preperation and cooking them!

I am not a 'newbie' but I will just copy this extract from your post;

"trollish" behavior. After all, what is life if not upon occasion to get a conversation going or, I admit it, to jerk a few chains!

Which of the above are you doing?

Who is worried about the difference of 30 Baht for a haircut between 70-100 Baht?

Maybe local (Thai) has smaller 'head of hair' than 'big hairy tourist Farang'!

There is a barber shop down near Chiang Mai Gate, on the intersection that leads back into the old town, just around from the market. There is a small one way system before it becomes 2 way. Like a previous post, take a photo of what you want. Average haircut 60 baht.

I get a flat top and all was good from first visit. never go anywhere else now.

Now haircut is 70Baht for Thai or resident, 100Baht for "tourist"

I would recommend any American who is considering opening a bank account in CM do so now, regardless of visa. With FATCA it won't be getting any easier.

I don't know if Thailand has signed up to FACTA (I assume it has) and if so it comes into force on 1 June 2014.

This must qualify as the 'bes't collection of worst worst jokes ever!

If it's not; please 'beat i'!t

JOKES GUARANTEED TO OFFEND

(Sorry if these have been run before, and sorry if some really DO offend - and sorry that I don't have MORE)

Q. What is better than winning a medal at the Special Olympics?

A. Not being crippled.

Q. What's blue and <deleted> old people?

A. Hypothermia

Q. What's the first thing a woman does when she gets out of the battered wives' shelter?

A. The dishes if she knows what's good for her

Q. How do you swat 200 flies at one time

A. Hit an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.

Q. What do 540,000 abused women every year have in common?

A. They don't listen.

Q. What's yellow and green and eats nuts?

A. Gonorrhoea

Q. How can you tell a macho woman?

A. She rolls her own tampons.

Q. Why do gays like ribbed condoms?

A. Better traction in the mud.

Q. What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson?

A. Acne usually doesn't come on a kid's face until he's at

least 13 years old.

Q. How do you turn a fox into an elephant?

A. Marry it.

Q. What do you get when you cross two black people?

A. Your ass kicked.

Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Q. Why do men pay more for car insurance?

A. Because women don't get blow jobs while they're driving.

Q. Why do women call it PMS?

A. Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

Q. What's a mixed feeling?

A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Q. How can you tell if you're at a bulimic stag party?

A. The cake jumps out of the girl.

Q. What's the difference between oral sex & anal sex?

A. Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak.

Q. How is pubic hair like parsley?

A. You push it to the side before you start eating.

Q. What's so good about an Ethiopian blowjob?

A. You know she'll swallow.

Q. Why don't they teach kids driver's education and sex education

on the same day in Iraq?

A. It's too hard on the camel.

Q. What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish

wife?

A. A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewellery.

Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?

A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

Q. How do the little boys at Michael Jackson's ranch know when it is bedtime?

A. When the big hand touches the little hand...

Q. How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and clean the house?

A. Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not time.

Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?

A. They spray paint X's on the back of the animals that kick.

I know there are sites with Thai (funny) Signs etc; but why do we not have a specific forum here on TV?

It could be fun!

My question about The Duke's has always been why the sign in Thai reads "The Duck's."

Who gives a 'Duck'.

Are you just showing off that you can read Thai?

Countryman, you love the cow and the goat and the fish. You can make lightning, but first you have to have that intention.

Eh!

If you subsititute "panda" for "cow", "chimp" for "goat", and "shrimp" for "fish", I think you'll see that it makes absolutely no difference.

You have turned me, Sadu Baba.

Does this mean that you understand and can explain the above doggerel?

Don t you ever watch movies, its a line from Countryman,great film,great soundtrack, you learn a little something everyday on ThaiVisa relax countryman

Countryman, you love the cow and the goat and the fish. You can make lightning, but first you have to have that intention.

Eh!

It may well be a quote from a film but:-

a) What does it mean?

What is the relevance to this thread?

Countryman, you love the cow and the goat and the fish. You can make lightning, but first you have to have that intention.

Eh!

I would imagine in your case you mean prostitutes. Fortunately for me, I came here as a young , handsome businessman and met a wonderful young lady 2 years younger than myself. I'm still with her 25 years later.

Besides being a troll, you're probably just a sad loser trying to make yourself look not as bad by hoping that you're not alone.

I would normally agree with you 100% (ok 90%) and I most certainly do agree with all your posts on this topic.

However I must ask when were you 'handsome' ? Time to change your TV profile and stop feeding 'Trolls'., They need to go back to their proper habitat

the bald, thai guy? Across from Sbicy.....yes, excellent/honest. The only place along there with the deet towelettes charges 8 thb, and they should be five.

In plain english please!

As a non golfer or crickiter can you please explain 'they play 3 x 6 instead of 2 x 9 so no problem' the math (or is that 'match') is still 18!

Yes. A round of golf is through 18 holes. Some courses like Gymkhana are nine hole courses so you play to the same greens twice-but on some courses the second half is played from different tee off areas. But most are just two of the same. As the cricket atch is making 3 of the golf holes unusable, you get your 18 hole round by playing 6 holes 3 times. But as a non golfing non cricketer you probably find my explanation very boring. Sorry.

What an erudite answer! Thank you.

I just wish all TV posters would be as courteous and do the same!

I also wish I could get away playing 6 holes 3 times, never mind a hole in one, as I think you golfers put it.

PS How do the 'cricketers get 'bye' with it?

As your avatar suggests you are of Scottish descent and you have some of the worlds finest golf courses and some mighty fine players.Unfortuantly in the great game of cricket the cupboard is quite bare as is the production line of footballers. I doubt many of the cricketers would hardly be aware of the golf course next door, they are there for the booze up.

Thank you.

Please remember that according to (please insert Mark Twain etc) Golf is a good walk spoiled and also that the England cricket team has been led in the past by a brilliant (watch the backlash) SCOTTISH captain called Mike Denness.

We may continue the 'Scottish football greats' in another topic if you so wish!

PS let bat, ball(s) and willow continue to meet on all turfs!

www.ehealthinsurance.com Get an STM......many options and prices. HCC and IHC are pretty good, imo.

Would one care to elucidate on 'STM', 'HCC' & 'IMC'. It may just help the OP (and others) who, as his insurance company appears to be non US based, may not understand your 'abbreviated' terminoligy.

Clarity in any international forum is very helpful, especilly if we remember we are not all from one nation!

PS Please don't ask me (us) to go to that website you quoted to find out the answers to the 'meanings'.

As a non golfer or crickiter can you please explain 'they play 3 x 6 instead of 2 x 9 so no problem' the math (or is that 'match') is still 18!

Yes. A round of golf is through 18 holes. Some courses like Gymkhana are nine hole courses so you play to the same greens twice-but on some courses the second half is played from different tee off areas. But most are just two of the same. As the cricket atch is making 3 of the golf holes unusable, you get your 18 hole round by playing 6 holes 3 times. But as a non golfing non cricketer you probably find my explanation very boring. Sorry.

What an erudite answer! Thank you.

I just wish all TV posters would be as courteous and do the same!

I also wish I could get away playing 6 holes 3 times, never mind a hole in one, as I think you golfers put it.

PS How do the 'cricketers get 'bye' with it?

Note to golfers, avoid until the cricket is over.

Spoke with a neighbour who golfed there today. It seems they play 3 x 6 instead of 2 x 9 so no problem

As a non golfer or crickiter can you please explain 'they play 3 x 6 instead of 2 x 9 so no problem' the math (or is that 'match') is still 18!

Why is the money paid to certain person(s) to allow the sale of alcohol (and other services/products) outwith the law called Tea Money? I want to drink alcohol, and do a few other things, but not drink tea.

A serious(!) Question. I can think of so many more appropriate terms!

I can only assume that he got his comeuppance. RIP

I think the one at Somphet market is open til 3am. It's my favourite pharmacy, as he never tries to sell you the over-priced imported product. He always offers the local generic brand at ridiculously cheap price. He very often under sells in some cases. Tell him you have a mild sore throat and he brings out the Fishermen's Friend!

Just go to 7 11.

Why go to 7-11

For the OP it might have helped if you had said where you were (in CM?) with this 'obviously' urgent need!

re

The Police are being VERY STRICT today

yeah right .... dream on !

i went to see finians rainbow tonight and when i went past a very well known riverside place at 8 35 pm on the way to loi kroh it was heaving , with two security guards seeing crowds of people accross the road from what used to be a gas station and 7 eleven

when i got to loi kroh it was shut up tighter than a ducks #rse

the police as usuall are being very selective where and who they are being strict with !

dave2

ps ... finians rainbow at the chiang mai international school

was a superbly done two and a half hour show where the leading lady , the leprachaun and silent susans balet style dancing floated my boat tonight

Maybe it was a 'private' party for selected parties of six.

I hope I'm not going to be bowled out of bounds by that comment at the Gymkhana Club!

I haven't seen Australian capricorn

Licorice at RIMPINGS in ages

Sent from my iPhone using ThaiVisa app

Nice to see the original topic has been taken off course again as usual!

Which goes some way towards explaining the crankiness and weirdness of some posters today!

I resemble that remark (hic)!