WOOHOO

For me this would be a fairly straight forward decision. If you have genuine concerns about Thailands future. You take the job, enjoy living in Italy for a while, and put some decent cash in the bank. Then if the future pans out OK here, and you miss the place, you come back. If it goes tits up here, or your just so happy there you don't want to come back, you stay.

Going, is the only option where you have the best of both worlds, you will have to eventually end up doing what's best for you. Not going leaves you with, what ifs and if onlys, and you'll never know if you made the right choice.

When you come back though, which I'm sure you will, come back to Phuket. I'm sure that's where your heart still is, right?

I actually posted my last post as a reminder to people that posting history is there for all to see and that previous posts can come back and bite you on the ars*.

Well spotted! Hypocrisy of the highest order. Still, I can't see him being a TV sponsor for much longer, what with his businesses all going belly up. And he's got the cheek to criticize somebody else's establishment. We all say stupid things, but the fact he hasn't apologized speaks volumes.

Phuket Island.

Krabi is also nice.

Were do you draw the line? There is so many places to choose from.

The variety of answers just goes to show how nice this place is.

If the OP didn't like the prices and traffic in Hua Hin then Phuket is the last place to come.

I agree with you though, it's by far the best place in Thailand as far as I'm concerned.

That's why I think somewhere like Krabi would be perfect. It's nice in it's own right, and cheap as chips, but you've got Phuket, Lanta, Phi Phi and 50 other islands, all on your door step. You don't get that anywhere else.

Off Shore Bar, Patong, Nanai Road at the corner to Soi 2. Good drinks, reasonable prices, food also not too bad. Snooker and Darts. (and just 40 meters walk to my house )

I drank in there for a bit, quite a while back, because it was a Chelsea pub. Do those 2 fellas still run it?

Other than the danger of carpet-baggers, which could fairly easily be legislated against, why would it be bad for the country? (Not a challenge, I genuinely don't know).

Excuse my ignorance, 'carpet-baggers'???

I obviously don't know for sure, I just have a strong feeling it couldn't possibly be in Thailand or Thai peoples advantage.

Firstly there is the wealth issue. Farang could buy every inch of Thailand a thousand times over. Where would that leave the Thais? They would become second class citizens in their own country.

Then there is the kind of people we're talking about. Thailand always has, and always will attract a certain kind of person. You give those people the ability to own land and the rights that come with it. Think of Pattaya x 100. A lot of people on TV harp on about the Thais disdain for Farang and violence toward them. I don't see too much of it myself, but can you imagine how that would escalate if Farang legally owned most of the country.

The way I see it. If you marry a Thai, and it is a legitimate relationship with legs, then you can in theory own what ever you want, it will just be in your wifes and children's names, not yours.

That of course is unfair to the decent folk, without Thai partners, who have integrated themselves in to the Thai community and would be perfect candidates to own their own land. But that's the way life is, the wrongens ruining things for every body else.

Maybe I'm biased because I have no fear putting anything in my families name, but putting individuals personal desires to one side, the laws as they are have to be the best for the country as a whole. That includes the strict employment laws as well.

od. I dont use foreign cards, but my tenants say this is the only ATM in Kata not charging on foreign cards withdrawal. french, english, scandinavian cards

When guests pay me on my Euro account (Dutch), I withdraw in Kata, mostly at Ayudya. And always get charged 150 baht.

I got charged 150 baht 3 days ago at Ayudya, and can't remember ever not being charged. There must be an obvious reason. A connection some how between the cards that do, and the ones that don't get charged.

if the government would allow me to own one house and the land it stands on after all

i cannot pack it in a bag and take it with me if i leave, i have heard rumors this may happen if it

does Phuket would be true paradise to me.

I think you and a lot of others, underestimate how badly that would affect the country. I think the paradise as we know it wouldn't last long. I don't think it will ever happen however, so I don't think we'll ever find out.

it amazes me that people did not see that this is just a troll

Lots of us respond to trolls. Trolls aren't a bad thing if they are cleverly disguised and start an interesting banter. Judging by the poor English I suspect the OP is either Thai or someone who writes English as a second language.

This troll was neither cleverly disguised, or interesting banter!!

Judging by the childish attempt at pretending English is his second language, I would guarentee it's his first.

Just another banned member, with no friends or partner, or children or life.

Krabi.

John.

I was going to say Krabi, but it's not really a seaside resort. It is however a lovely place, and if being right next to swimmable water isn't a necessity, then definitely worth thinking about. To be right near the beach you'd need to go to Ao Nang, but that's pretty crappy and a bit too quiet for what you're after, as is Krabi to be honest.

I highly recommend the region though. If you can find somewhere that ticks all the boxes in the Phuket, Phang Nga, Krabi region, then you're laughing. The amount of off shore islands to explore and stunning scenery, is unrivaled in Thailand for my money.

Anyhow...I agree with you about Surin, I think its one of the best areas Phuket if not for the beach in the day.

Totally agree. Wouldn't go near Surin beach during the day, but I was at the catch beach club today, just as the sun was setting. If that isn't what life in Phuket is all about I don't know what is.

I'm not being argumentative (for once) but there are tens of places of that quality from Kamala up to Bang Tao. I can't think of any in the south. Have I missed some somewhere?

I don't think that there is anything unstable about being a gypsy. But I don't think that people really appreciate the benefits of travel until they've learnt about a first place. They've got nothing to compare the differences and similarities.

SC

Those points are true for adults maybe, but we're talking about children. As pointed out already, the only differences and similarities a 3 year old will notice is that their friends have suddenly disappeared. If you were talking about teenagers, who could make the decision best for them, to either stay with friends or go traveling and experience new things, then that's fine. Young children need those decisions made for them.

People who have to work away from home, because quite simply that's where their work is, and as a result give their families a good secure life, are certainly not at fault. But it's a different story, if someone is making the wrong decision for their children just so they can spend more time on holiday.

That's good question. I'm not surprised to hear a lot of advice against it since it surely isn't the road most families follow.

But what you all think about those people who take their children out of school for 1-2 years to travel the world? Are they also breaking up their childrens need for stability?

I didn't know people did take their kids out of school for that long to go traveling. In the UK, I would have thought that would be against the law!

Obviously there is an argument that a child would learn far more in a year traveling, different cultures and languages etc than he would in a class room, but that would be a one off kind of thing. What you're talking about doing, is long term. Not leaving then coming back, once, but continually leaving and coming back, year in year out. I personally think a kid exposed to that wouldn't know his arse from his elbow after a while.

I hear a lot of stories about people who grew up with parents in the military, and they never seem to remember the constantly moving and making new friends kindly. I would even go as far to say, some seem a little scarred by the experience.

I just think that sometimes we can convince ourselves that something is OK, simply because it's what we want to do, when the reality is it isn't OK, and we should be doing something else, even at the cost of our own happiness or convenience.

Having said that, as you quite rightly mention. The love of two decent parents is by far the most important of things. With that, most kids turn out all right.

I can't see how missing a couple of weeks will be to much of a problem.

Should be ok till they reach high school then the schools tend to get a bit stricter.

Your probably right. I just figured though, that what with this being Thailand and the fact that at a private school you're handing over a wad of cash every term, that they might not care to much. Especially if you were showing that you were making sure the kids caught up on the work they missed.

I would be interested to hear back from the OP, to see if he has been deterred by the advice given, or weather he's going to go ahead and give it ago.

If you want to go and work in another country, go on your own. Lots of us do.

SC

I know people have to do what they have to do, but in an ideal world that isn't a great solution either. A couple of times a year I go to the UK on my own for 2 weeks. I hate it, and couldn't do any longer than that away from my family. How people go away for months at a time blows my mind.

As I said. I believe the only real option is to pick a country and then spend school holidays in the other. I'm planning on maybe trying to steal a couple of weeks at the end of the summer term and maybe get 8 weeks in the uk. I can't see how missing a couple of weeks will be to much of a problem.

If you like Hua Hin but the price puts you off, then isn't Cha Am the obvious choice. All the same facilities down the road but cheaper property prices.

I currently travel between the two. Not quite 50/50, a bit more spent here in Thailand but still go back for summers in England.

We are doing this now because we can. Our son is only 2 1/2. When he starts proper school things will have to change, and the amount of time we go back to the UK will be reduced to school holidays with an extra week or two added on maybe.

For the sake of a childs stability, we can't always live exactly how we want. I would say it's not impossible to continue as you are, but schooling and general routine and stability would suffer. I'm no expert, just making it up as I go along myself, but that's what we've decided.

I suppose then that my Dad was wrong as he was 55 and my Mum 40 when I was born.

My brother is 78 this year.

Barring accidents I hope to be around another 20 years so does that make me selfish?

I was 32 when I married the first time and my son from that marriage is now 32.

This is always a touchy one, which I'm sure would be best left alone, but this is a public forum and we're all adults here, so I don't see why I should hold back.

I can't possibly comment on your personal situation. If you say you had a normal upbringing with a dad who was 70 when you were 15 (if he was still alive) then I'm happy for you. I personally wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I hate to tell you this, but what we hope for and what happens are two different things. You may want to be around for 20 more years, but as a gambling man, I would happily wager a few quid you won't be. Even if you are, what level of physical and mental input will you be able to put in between now and then? It will get less and less fairly rapidly I assure you. And even if you do make it that much longer, it still leaves your son fatherless, in his early twenties!! I'm sure he'll be thrilled!

People come to Thailand to start second families, with women much younger than themselves, at an age, at which quite frankly they should no better. Why? Because they want to, and because they can.

So I'm sorry to say it, but in answer to your question. Yes, I consider you selfish for having a child at your age.

Overall, the Thai culture still has many valuable traits as compared to the culture in most of Farangland, which I would describe as diseased at best.

However, I do think that it is dangerous to completely trust your child's education to the Thai system. There are bad aspects of Thailand just as there are good ones. For that reason, I am planning on home schooling my children. I do not believe anyone can teach them as well as I can. I have more concern for their well being and more interest in their development than any teacher even at an expensive international school.

It is impossible to shield them from the larger Thai culture, nor would I want to. But I do want an opportunity to speak with them on a daily basis and to make sure that I can recognize any small signs that they are heading down a path that isn't good for them. I don't know whether I will succeed, but I sincerely hope I can integrate the best aspects of both Thailand and Farangland in them.

That will be easier to do in Thailand where things are not nearly as controlled and intrusive as they are in the West.

I don't think that is the way to go. Interaction with others is a huge part of a childs daily life, not talking with his dad! You can still do what you said, watch for the signs that things are going wrong, but for the sake of your child, do it outside of school hours.

I went to an all boys school, and although it didn't hold me back personally, I think others may have been worse affected. I would never send my son to a single sex school as I believe it is denying them a normal level of interaction. Home schooling in my opinion would be 100 times worse.

I think the fact the we as parents are trying to decide, which way things will pan out is an issue. Nature needs to take its course to a certain degree, and things develop naturally. At the end of the day, regardless of fads and fashions, they are exactly what they are. 50 50 right down the middle.

Let me explain.....it is not the guy I really defend, as you I would expect if he has had the opportunity to teach his children English, and they have shown the slightest inclination to do so......then I agree he should assist in the bilingual education, and in that case he has neglected to do the best for his children.

To my mind the vitriolic aggressive posts regarding a man, who let us be in no doubt.....is doing no less than millions other (Thai) fathers in Thailand.......are founded on assumption that he had full control, in order to fuel the verbal tide.

Did he have the 'opportunity' to teach. Did he have 'full control' or not.

As well as being a fan of logic, I'm also a huge fan of the law of averages. For someone of your mature years, (no offense, I have no idea what, 'Top end middle aged' means, but I'm guessing it's old) you should no better.

The chances this man didn't have every opportunity to teach his children, and didn't have full control, of his life, (unless you're saying an alcohol problem or an inability to hold down a job are justified reasons for not having full control) are very slim.

This is an internet forum, so we are all only basing our opinions on the information given, and the hypothetical assumption that they are true. Defending this man because he has no judge and jury is a bit pointless.

With my inferior life experience, and my healthy respect for the law of averages, I'll wager, that the man in question, was a despicable waist of space, as are a huge amount of Farang in Thailand. This place will always attract a certain kind of person. You won't help matters by defending them.

Firstly I ask the OP, does he legally own the apartment under Thai law? If so, has he declared any earnings from rent with the tax office?

As for the Thai guy managing the OPs renting business, he's sounds like, a one born every minute and complete incompetent, plus as a landlord the OP seems to have no idea how to control his tenants or have any idea the risks involved with property renting.

Best to count your loses, put it down to experience and get out the property renting game altogether.

Probably very true, but not very helpfull in solving the current problem.

I have a villa in Samui as well as Phuket (also a house in Bangkok) but I prefer Phuket the most. Samui is great but very island centric, not much to do after a few days and many of the locals are a bit weird ( only my impression).

I spent over 10 years in Bangkok but, except for business, it seems to be missing something. I don't live under the misconception that Phuket is the perfect island paradise but over the last 13 years also since I first built my first villa here I think it is a great balance between east and west.

Yeh, no one likes a show off.

I've lived here for ten years, and can't imagine living anywhere else.

Why? All of the reasons given above. Phuket has its problems, but it's an amazing, magical place, with something new and different happening every day.

'An amazing, magical place'. you'd never know it to hear all the moany crap on here. Why don't we have more threads like this. More threads sharing knowledge of where to go, what to do, how to have fun. What's great about the place.

There'll always be room for the doom and gloom, Tuk Tuk gang, but why not make those posts the minority, and positive ones the majority.

I'll re-quote... 'An amazing, magical place'.

I'm not a violent man, but if the Thai man has the inclination and the means to sort this out the 'Thai way', then let him, using either police as mentioned, or thugs. They sound like they deserve what ever they get. Everybody knows the Thai man will be favoured and taken care of by the authorities. If he isn't that way inclined, then he needs to go to the police and start official procedure. One way or another people like this need to be stopped. I for one wouldn't be so principled to care how!

Your comment about comparing Thalang and Chalong, and not talking about Cherng Talay, highlights your lack of understanding. Cherng Talay is in Thalang. Comparing Cherng Talay and Chalong is much closer to like for like.

I will leave this thread here. The fact that we seem to be on different planets some times, isn't going to help us agree any time soon. I will however comment on anything else you say, if I happen to disagree.

[name=473geo]

Dear dear....once again a clumsy attempt to justify your poor logic - if the guy had his arms and legs cut off, does that effect his ability to speak English to the child??

Logic is something I take very seriously. Are you telling me someone who has been in an horrific accident is in a position mentally or physically to be a good parent. I'm not saying they would become a bad parent, but their input may well have to be put on hold for a while. I fail to see any logic in why you are giving this man the benefit of the doubt.

apart from the fact that if he is of a certain age, half deaf, or severely disabled he should in your eyes not have designed his future in the way that he has!!!!

There is no doubt in my mind that lots of people have children for their own selfish needs. They put their desire for a child before, weather or not they would be good parents. That, I assure you defies logic. Be it that they are the wrong age, have an inability to support them financially, or are severely disabled themselves, or numerous other reasons.

I've a suggestion for you.....firstly.....I will cease responding because you clearly wish to have the last word......

I will continue to put my opinion across, all the time I believe it is valid. If you believe you are so right, and I am so wrong, that you should no longer waist your time discussing it with me, then yes, you should stop responding. I have a sneaky feeling that perhaps you are one of the elderly fathers that I am talking about, and that's why you would rather leave it there. I may be wrong, but I guess we'll never know.

Enjoy growing older and experiencing life, your comments tell me you sure have a great big learning curve ahead

I hope you're right. At 33, and over 9 years in to my first marriage, with no children from any previous relationships, I'm probably in a minority of people married to Thai woman. I'm not saying there's not a lot of people like me out there, because there are, but there's a lot more that aren't.

Neither myself or my wife were natural parents, as a lot of people are, especially woman. I know we've made mistakes and we will continue to do so, but at the end of the day we are both decent people, with our child's best interests to heart. If we weren't going to dedicate our lives to doing the best we could for him, then we wouldn't have had him in the first place. We could have then carried on traveling the world being care free, piss heads. Which thinking about it would have been great, but you can't have it both ways. Be parents or don't. Don't sit your pathetic arse anywhere in the middle. Again I'll clarify, that's not aimed at you but the sack of shit, you and lots of other people, bizarrely, are defending.

just a selfish clown in los for his own benefit before putting his wife and family first

Couldn't be easier to understand for me. Surprised so many people have seen it differently.