stephaniee

Watch ur own missus it can happen to anyone

Sadly I have concluded that this is probably all too true. It is common knowledge in my village that the wives of two other farangs have Thai boyfriends. These poor guys have both built houses and one has helped his wife start a small business. Both are away part of the year working to earn money for the family, during which time the wives find other things to do. The age gap between these husbands and wives isn't that great, and I'd say one man is about 40 and one about 50. So it is not the old guy marries young 'hottie' scenario that some might think. I'm glad that my wife travels with me when I go back to my home country to work.

i think the majority of us know that the girls ARE NOT hottie types

In Pattaya, the maid always gets a tip.

A friendly, seeming genuine serviceer at a restaurant - if I go there on a regular basis - gets a tip.

Otherwise, no.

Only tourist from the US and countries that tip, leave tips in Thailand.

And they screw it up for the rest of us.

how do they screw it up?

120,000$ and you cant make it. something is very very wrong! you need to call suze orman 4 help. she can be seen weekends on cnbc in thailand.

Read it properly love. I'm keeping two homes.

i read fine. get rid of one you cant afford to have 2 homes.

120,000$ and you cant make it. something is very very wrong! you need to call suze orman 4 help. she can be seen weekends on cnbc in thailand.

Not suggesting that at all. He hasnt told us what the offer is, although as he says it's below his US salary he implies it's not that low.

My point is this. He is relatively lucky. I imagine the salary is what I call a local salary +, which seems to be a new band of pay range. We can't just divide salaries into local salaries and GH's definition of expat salaries.

The huge expat salaries are for those roles which CAN'T be filled locally. But there are a range of middle management jobs offered to farangs which COULD be done locally, but for some reason the companies want expats. They will not pay huge salaries and school allowances, but they WILL pay significantly higher than local rates. I have no firm figures on this, but based on experiences in my old company I imagine the role would be paid around 200,000 a month for an expat, a significant premium on the 70-80k a local might expect to earn.

In the end, it's up to the individual. How much does he want to be here?

you make $120, ooo and you are broke. man you need to read some financial planning books. its one thing to make a lot but if you re sknint something is very wrong .

The offer is $58000 US dollars per year. I haven't really gotten into all the details yet, so I don't know about any allowances, health care, car housing, etc. A project manager in the US usually earns about $61000 US dollars per year. According to Kelly Services, a Thai project manager earns about 720000 Baht per year or about $21000 US dollars per year.

So I guess it does seem like a reasonable offer, but I had hoped for more just for the hassle of uprooting my family to Thailand.

Does $58000 US dollars per year offer a "comfortable" living? By that I mean a nice house or condo in a good, safe part of Bankok, good schools for my kids, a car, and money for recreation, and then some to invest? That salary is just comfortable here in Tampa Florida.

Not enough information Florida. Lot's of shooting from the hip here on both sides of the argument, but it is my view that before anyone can give you any valid advice you need to tell us (and if you don't know, you NEED to know);

1. Will the package be covering your local tax obligation?

2. Is there a cost of living allowance?

3. Is there a private schooling allowance for the kids?

4. Is there a housing allowance?

5. Is there a car allowance (or equivalent)

6. Is there an R&R component (can you go on a local -say 1000 miles radius - vacation on their dollar) and how often do you get home visits - once a year? For all of you?

7. There is an assumption you are being paid in Thailand? Perhaps you are being paid in the US. If so, watch the exchange rate. I came here, paid in the US when you got 41 baht to the US$. It dropped to 31 at one point, a 25% hit.

8. Will you still have obligations in the US (house, for example)?

9. What about Social security? If that is not continued to be paid, you will impact your retirement credits. Unless you cough up the 15% yourself (because you'll have to pay the employers component too).

I could go on and on. But, let's assume your $58k package is net. That translates to about two million baht, or about B165k a month. Decent accommodation to the standard I'm sure you expect will run AT LEAST B40k per month, probably B50k. Schools will run perhaps B20k/month per child and you'll spend at least B15k a month at the supermarket (this is a family guys, not a single person). Utilities (electric/water/cable/internet/phone) will be at least B10k a month and remember you are likely to have to invest upon arrival in bed linen and kitchen utensils at least because your rental will almost certainly not supply them. Then there's perhaps a TV and some sort of music system because you might not get that either. The point is, don't forget the "unexpected" cost of being comfortable to the level you expect for your family). A car will cost you at least B600k, double if you want an SUV (Toyota or the like)though if you have a work permit you'll get it on credit, perhaps another B25k (B50k for an SUV) a month plus B2k a month for car insurance and another B1k a month for renters insurance. So, your monthly outgoings are already B140k+ and you have not hit a bar or restaurant yet. Medical insurance will run you about B50k a year through BUPA, not sure about a family, but bet B100k, or equivalent to another B8k a month. Add to that the money that "trickles" out of your pocket;B2k trickled out of mine yesterday at MBK. Don't forget that trip home; US$6k for a round trip cattle class for four, or the "cheap" vacation to Koh Samet ($1000 cheap).

So, pending your response to the questions I posed, I reckon that with a family and with your (very reasonable) expectations as to your quality of life, if it's a flat (net) US$58k you cannot afford to live here in the manner to which you have become accustomed in Florida. You can do it, but expect to take a step down.

So, now I open the floodgates to the naysayers, but please no B20k a month condos (fleapits) or cheapshit schools or suggestions to use a fan to save on the aircon. I know Bangkok is full of cheap charlie farangs who live on peanuts and look like tramps. I see them every day with the arse hanging out of their trousers (yes, I am a Brit). This is a family guy with very reasonable living standard expectations. Please don't mislead him. We all know the farang who lives in a nice house (B2M) in Nakhon Nowhere and spends only B10k a month and wastes all day swigging Leo and firing a BB gun at scorpions. Not a real comparison though, is it?

As for my "qualifications" I live in Bangkok, I am paid in the US and I make considerably more than our friend but I do have obligations (house, utilities etc) in the US which gobble up US$50k a year. I make $120k in a bad year and I'm broke and I pay no rent here because I own. No, I don't blow it on fancy restaurants or Cowboy or bargirls either. My wife is very reasonable with her spending and we eat at home most nights. I've been subsidizing myself out of savings just to get by. On $58k it is not going to happen for him.

janitorial services ! cost is issue, they want to pay him less...........

maybe op is of dubous quality. his co cant just fire him but sending him overseas may help!

doesnt it sound strange to send him away and pay him less!

hmmmmmmmmmmm

if op want to go to los he better take what company offers. im sure lots of thais who could do his job.

im with bendix on this one. holy COW!

if your family includes little kids dont go. let a single guy get the job!

i wouldnt want to raise western kids in los, unless you get a darn good pay raise 4 your troubles.

Hi everybody,

I trust the wife. Don't know her family very well. Mum and stepfather need to build a house cause they are currently living with stepfather's parents and they don't get on.

Mum likes her drink so has fallen out with everybdy that they have tried to live wth.

So..it up to me to fund the house. How much does it cost to build a small place for two in Isarn?

Wife already has the land.

Any thoughts?

Sure... Take everything you got in your bank account, pension, and investments and put it on the table.

Now, slide it across the table to your wife and relatives, with a big grin, knowing you'll never get it back.

Seriously, is this a place where you want to OWN a house in the future. When the parents go to see Jesus (or someone like him), are you going to move in? Re-sale will be impossible.

I vote to rent a place for the old codgers - you are not a fricking money tree.

ahhhhhhhhhhh.....but many a re seen as a money tree, nothing more nothingless...................!

I lived 'out in the sticks' with my then girlfriend for 9 months or so.

Interracting with the family was never a problem. I never felt they were dissing me.

The MIL would bring me fruit, massage my back and be concerned if she did not see me for a few hours.

The family always made me feel welcome too.

I would buy the beers one night and the family would buy them another night. Sitting on the 'porch' drinking beers and able to have a good laugh with the family was great fun AND I could barely speak a word of Thai.

I'd say you were one lucky bastard! Why didn't you marry that girl?

She became the problem. Greater demands month on month. Never content with what we had and with what I gave.

I am still made welcome there though with the family. Shame it ended but now we remain friends. She even offered to vet my new girlfriends to see if they were money-grabbers. Ironic, considering. LOL.

im starting to see a pattern with these upcountry chicks................does anyone else ee the same

weather and thai food! and all the nois, kois, pois, mois, etc apples, oranges, bananas.etc.( all girl names for you who dont know the connection)

On Friday I saw a fat middle aged hiso woman publicly denounce a younger Thai girl as a prostitute because she was dressed sexy and accompanying a farang. Probably a lot of people would have thought the same, but actually it was his wife, and from the polite tongue lashing she dished out (in English!) it was pretty obvious she was nothing of the sort.

This must be one of the most saddest posts ever.

When she lashed out in an English polite tounge lashing, why was it obvious she wasn't a Bargirl with a Farang ?

If she had lashed out in Lao. would that have cemented her fate as a bargirl in your eyes ?

Very strange, very odd,. very unbelievable.

You really do need to travel more

if man was twice as big as girl and twice her age she proolly was a girl of the bar

What is a 'joiner' ??

Additional person or persons who come to stay, usually overnight, with you in your hotel room.

Need a diagram?

Once you pay the joiner fee, they become 'registered guests'.

joiners commonly refereed to as bargirls

some hotels ok with em others dont want em !

u just a disaster waiting to happen. better u just leave it all behind.

u going to kick out guy after he has baby? your wife going to lose her face! if you want just to marry a girl and not her family dont choose thai girl.

what i read here just isnt what i see on the streets of bangkok!

away from tourist areas i hardly even see white man and thai girl, regardless of ages.

I wish posters would post their wife or gf's picture with them standing..

We would see a ton of fat/ugly guys with bar girls, ugly/fat guys with poor girls looking for money and then would be able to determine who's opinion on thai life/women could be accepted since those people have no idea about real thailand/thai girls.. they came here to get sex or love for money... even though they won't admit it.

And you could get all this information from a photograph?

You are either:

(a) psychic, or

( a complete tosser.

reason for edit:- had to think of another word for fuc_kwit

it is very ez to see what kind of girl a guy has by observing them, photos would be great!

whats going on. maigo sympathetic to the plight of the farang upcountry!

no offense but building a house upcountry is inviting the family to come live with you!

tom, how does a good ole country thai boy steal 30,000$ from a smart guy like you?

did u keep it under the mattress?

i still cant see y middle class europe guys want to get involved with thailand's less advantaged folk.

sell the wife.........................lol!

man here is ovious bucket of money to girl and family.

he should buy a pair of mike jordan 100$ sneakers and run the hel_l away from this family.

put a shout out to mr maigo.

it seems we have another case where the farang is exploiting the poor thai people

it could be interpreted that you are uncomfortable with the living arrangement that includes the partners family. is there any particular reason you must live with them?

i would suggest otherwise you and spouse live separate from them.

or if thats not an option, enroll in thai language classes. the basics are not that difficult to learn, and see how you get on.

he must live with them coz it all about the baht.

i may be imagining things but this sounds like the classic situation where he married girls family also.

it sounds like he may have to pay for two houses if he want to get rid of wifes family.

so many downsidesto marry upland girls, is it worth it guys?

airport link? the bts? i havent seen the infrastructure going all the way to arport area, am i blind?

op needs to grow up......................!

op has to sweat it! he knows he paddling up the river wo a paddle.

no need to be nasty to posters who just pointing out you in a precarious situation. you must obviously be concerend that you might get the shaft as so many others have.

no matter what people say farangs just seem to lose control when it comes to thai girls and money!