roygsd

So mr Finger if I see someone attacking, robbing or threatening you I must not interfere because I might kill them B.llsh.t Get a life.

They weren't threatening a person. They were unscrewing plates off a motorbike when they thought nobody was around.

Instead, it was an ambush set up by a landlord who wanted blood and probably even placed the motorbike as bait.

You telling me to get a life, boy?

If you think someone who doesn't condone premeditated murder needs to get a life, you've got some real problems with your marbles.

People like you need to see a professional before you do something really stupid.

I think they both deserved to die, shame he only killed one of them. why do people think they can just take what they want, I work hard for what I have. if some thieving arse came onto my property I would dish out as much pain as I could. and then plant a knive in his hand.

Another Walter Mitty warrior............

Roy gsd

SOURCE: Pattaya Daily News: August 20th 2008

Mr.Sanae, the landlord, immediately, walked from the dark and yelled out. The 2 suspects were alarmed and one of them grabbed a chopping knife and another one grabbed a metal hammer, were coming to attack him. Mr. Sanae had fired a gunshot in the sky (.99 mm.), but it could not stop the thieves from moving towards him.

Bullshit. I'll never believe that two guys (not one, two) continued to advance an attack on a guy with a gun after a warning shot had been fired in the air.

In this life, violence is the worst thing you can do. And murder is the worst kind of violence.

The landlord is a murderer. Anger at intruders and theives is no excuse for murder.

Those of you who think these kids deserved to die and the murderer deserves to get off free, you are warped and twisted.

Murder is worse than theft.

I also am not convinced the shooter is not being economical with the truth, once the warnign shot was fired I suspect they would have fled given the opportunity................. killing a kid for trying to steal a poxy motorbike isnt brave or clever.

What trigger happy people here conviniently fail to question is " why was the landlord carrying a gun in a public place anyway? From the O/P it seems the killer was aware tof the earlier theft and decided to arm himself and wnt down there to lie in wait in the hope they would return.

As the landlord apparently own's several properties in the area and property prices are not exactly cheap in Pattaya it would be no suprise to me if it turned out this guy was a serving or former policeman or at least has close connections to the police.

Roy gsd

What do you do inside…......When it’s raining outside? (is your area flooding?.....any pics )……beside being on thaivisa which is quite boring lately?

Or

Any exciting or unique ideas to pass the time?

-----------------------------------------------------

For me…..

Well I'm stuck at home with nothing else to do , except just laying dead in the middle of my living room watching the rain dropping on the skylights, while chewing on my thai spicy dried squids!!

I don't have the cable tv anymore, coz well you know….economy is not so good so we cut back on that and save 1200 bths a month, beside we don' really watch tv that much anyway.....so easy to let go........

Ofcourse I have works to do, hence I'm still “RAT-RACING” but too lazy to do at the moment, so I'm taking a few days off to stay home,....but with no real immediate plan of activities...

Or may be I might work on my blog….still don’t know yet…..

How about you?

Same as I do when its dry outside

roy gsd

My driver says that they stopped ALL cars with a Thai driver and farang passengers. They asked no questions at all from my driver and he said nothing either - they simply wrote him a ticket for operating an illegal taxi.....

Simon

Have to agree here.. Its in the Thai drivers interests to say everyone got hit.. I assume he didnt pay the fine from his own pocket, so in essence hes softening the blow to you, in true thai fashion.

They probably pulled him over, said "your a taxi service heres your fine" and he said "chai khap"..

I bet if he told them on your bike, this is, etc and fought there wouldnt be a ticket.. He just absorbed the loss as its no skin of his nose that his rich farang boss pays, and everyones happy (everyone Thai that is). He didnt have to argue with a policeman, no one lost face, etc etc etc.

Theres no way I am believing if he wasnt a 'complimentary taxi' and was just a farang friend that he would have been forced and agreed to pay it.

Hi,

What no one seems to have queried is the Insurance aspect of the vehicle, if you are transporting customers then you should have the correct insurance in place to cover any injury to the customer should the vehicle be involved in an accident.

Lets be sensible here, the cost of the vehicle, its fuel and maintanance, and the drivers salary are not insignificant costs, no-one can really believe that this transport service is being provided by the hotel and the costs have not been included in their room rate or other charges.

A "free" ride is suddenly not that attractive to the customer if the Insurance company quite rightly refuses to payout

if they were unaware that the vehicle is being used for commercial purposes.

You may pay a little more ( not sure that is the case really) for a licenced taxi but at least the vehicle and driver are regulated and you have somewhere to go if things go wrong.

THe cost of a car in LOS isnt much cheaper than a car in the uk and may well be more expensive, fuel and servicing isnt that much different in price either, so the only saving if any could be because of the cheap cost of the drivers labour.

If you dont want to pay for a taxi then uses the bus, thats the alternative at home so why should the customer dictate what the meter rate charges should be? The Authorities set the taxi meter rate, if you get in a cab and the driver refuses to put on the meter get out and get in another one and report the original driver to the relevant licencing authority.

Companies in the uk who provide transportation such as hotels/ limo services/ airport runs etc are now having to be licenced and regulated by many local authorities in the uk and ensuring the vehicle is roadworthy, taxed, appropriately insured and the driver and owner and operator have passed police background checks of is great for the customer.

If the boot were on the other foot and the taxi drivers started to operate unregulated hotels and steal the hotel owners customers hotel owners would be complaning like hel_l.

It is nothing to do with providing customers with free transport for the hotel customers, merely a marketing tool that provides a very useful additional income to the hotels.

Roy gsd

The language barrier issue in Thailand would certainly not make me chose to

open a major business in this country.

I have tried hard to learn to speak Thai. I don't consider myself to be totally incompetent

regarding foreign languages because I've learnt others successfully. But here

several Thais seriously said to me they prefer it if foreigners do not try to speak anyThai unless it is a good standard!

What kind of encouragement is that?

Has anyone noticed how they have a very low tolerance for learners who try to speak Thai?

Is it any wonder that you lose your confidence and your desire to keep trying to learn?

But on the other side of the coin just today I tried to get information regarding what one could consider

a prestige standard service in Thailand and yet :-

1. After sending an e-mail to them

(admittedly in English ) three times all e-mails have been ignored !

2. They are supposed to have an English version of their web site

which is not working and I see on a posting on Wikpedia somebody commented this was the case

as far back as February of this year so there is obviously no desire to remedy that either !

3. I have tried several times to speak with someone at their office on the telephone

and whilst some staff speak absolutely no English the few that do are unable

to understand my question.

So in the end it looks as though I may need to rely on a Thai person to help me

translate to get the required information.

In the global world of 2008 I'm surprised still find the situation still exists in Thailand

and I doubt if you'd have quite so many problems in neighboring countries.

Hi,

Who is Them ?

roy gsd

Please list things that I should watch out for here in thailand. Good or bad.

Thanks

BK

1st Rule.

NEVER RING THE BELL IN A BAR!

If you want to learn why out why wit il the bar is full of us obnoxious brits (as a disapointed yank on here calls us)

and all will become clear,,,,,,,,,,,, LOL

roy gsd

Please list things that I should watch out for here in thailand. Good or bad.

Thanks

BK

hi,

Your health and wealth.

Happiness, in one form or another will soon bewith you in LOS.

roy gsd

You need professional advice t move forward with this issue, try to locate a counsellor and take both your wife and kids to discuss.

A counsellor??????? Is that your trade or are you just insane?

Roy gsd

I've been with my Thai wife for nearly 5 years now.She has two Thai sons,aged 11 and 16,from a previous marriage to a Thai man.

I cant fault my wife .She takes good care of me and her sons and keeps the house tidy and clean etc.She's not afraid of hard work and is very kindhearted.

I get on really well with the 11 year old boy.True,he's naughty sometimes but thats to be expected and we have a good laugh together,like a father and son should do.

The problem is the 16 year old.He's not very bright (not that I hold that against him) and isnt interested in school.Last year we found he had been bunking off school a fair bit and he was one of only two boys who failed to attain his grades for that year.We arranged for him to do retakes of the subjects he had failed but that took up almost 3 months of the new school year.

My wife decided that as he had missed 3 months of his current year it would be better if he skipped this curriculum till next year ie. take the subjects a year behind.

His character is not good.Lying and cheating seem to be second nature to him.Now he is not at school till next year his life seems to consist of lazing in bed till at least lunchtime,then going out playing online games in the afternoon and then meeting up with his mates at night smoking and drinking Thai whisky and coming home only when he feels like it.

I am not happy about this.My wife says try to understand him as he is only young.But he is abusive towards her and so lazy when asked to do even the simplest of household chores.Too be honest he doesnt listen to my wife and its only when I speak firmly to him that he will do anything.

Sometimes he doesnt come home or not till the early hours.He's only 16 years old and thats just not on as far as I am concerned.

I found him rooting through my wifes handbag in our bedroom once,maybe looking for money.My wife told me he did this before she met me.

I said why doesnt he get a job whilst hes not at school and make a bit of money but hes not interested.Too much like hard work.

For me,I wouldnt give him any money till he improves,just feed him,but I know my wife will relent and give him some baht every time.

Personally I feel like beating the living shit out of him but what would that achieve other than making me feel better in the short term !

His personality sames to be exactly the same as his fathers,a complete waster,drunkard and womaniser.

Its reaching the stage where I feel this boy is spoiling my life big time.I'd be so happy if he went to live with his grandparents three hours drive away.

But that would be passing the buck.He would just spoil their life.

I've even said to my wife if he doesnt go then I will.Again,unfair on my wife and younger son for they have done nothing wrong.

But,on the other side of the coin,if he doesnt go I am left living with a complete waster for possibly the rest of my life,not fair on me.

So,grateful for any ideas people might have as to how this can be resolved.I should say that,other than for this boy,I would have a great life over here.

I didnt leave stressed out UK for even more stress in Thailand.

Thanks for any help/advice.

Hi,

Read you post and several of the responses to it, much of the advice seems well meant but from experience ( non Thai) I can assure you that there is much truth in the old saying you can bring a horse to water but can't make it drink ".

Each kid is different from another so what works for one may not necessarily work for another, however as its easier to resolve other peoples problems than our own I suggest you consider stepping back and look at the bigger picture to see what is really going on at home.

I was a shit as a kid and a good hiding did nothing but make me more determined to come out on top ( and I did) , please forget some of the advice to throttle him as this is a sure fire way of allowing him to gain support from other family members.

The kid isnt the problem and you know it, he takes the piss because he knows he can get away with pretty much what he likes and will continue to do so.

How do you get on with the Garandparents? If you support them in some way explain the problem and ask them to back you up if the kid turns to them, if you have to lace your request so that it leaves them with the impression that they might be having to support their daughter and kids if you give up and decide to leave LOS so be it.

THen there is the not insignificant problem of getting the kids mother to work with you rather than against you, not easy but if she wants to undermine your efforts now then maybe you are better off cutting your losses now rather than a year or two down the road which seems pretty much how you see it at present anyway.

Be careful not to paint her or the boy into a corner though, give them both choices and leave the final decision to them.

Explain to the wife that you are unhappy with the situation and changes have to be made, if the boy is to have any real future etc.

Dont know what financial arrangements exist in your house but before speaking to the wife I would be quietly putting my assets out of her reach, just in case things go pear shaped.

When it is safe to do so, tell the wife that you are not prepared to ignore the boy being disrespectful to her or put up with his

abusive and disruptive ways any more, and starting tomorrow morning the boy will have to comply with the new house rules and make it clear that she has to support you in this.

When you have the mother on side, ( or failing that she knows the score!) sit the boy down with the pair of you and ask him why he feels he should be allowed to lie in bed all day rather than go to school and if he says he wants to quit school just tell him he is making a big mistake but if thats what he wants then its no skin off your nose and tell him to write a letter there and then to the school explaining why he will not be returning.

After you have the letter from him I would then tell him that starting tomorrow you will be up at ( whatever time he should be up for school) for breakfast and you will leave the house at the same time and not return to the house until the usual time he got back from school, during that time he must go find job and if he has not found a job within one week then all allowances will cease. I would then tell him that when he has a job he must provide his mother with a sizable chunk of his earnings each month to pay for his keep as there are no passengers in the house whilst you are paying the bills.

Also tell him that if he fails to get out of bed when called he will get a bucket of cold water thrown over him whilst he is in the bed and he will have to bring the bedding don and put them out to dry in the yard, he likely will not belive you but I guarantee that the first time he gets a soaking he will know that he is no longer in control.

(My old man threatened to bash the granny out of me if my older brother didnt get up for work everyday. I warned him but he just ignored me,so I opened the front door and made sure my escape path was clear before launching water and bucket on him as I fled at top speed out and away down the street with my naked 16 ish year old brother breathing fire down my neck as I went! 40+ years he still cannot get over the fact I meant what I said Fortunately I never had to do it again).

If it takes a few soakings so much the better, I would also set a time for him to be home each evening (9 pm is reasonable if he is due at school next day but up to you ) and explain that if he fails to keep to that deadline he must expect to find the door firmly locked and will remain that way unitil next morning.

At the first sign of disrespect for your rules ( which includes being respectful to everyone living in the home) I would take his mobil phone/computer and if he has one a motor bike off him for at least a month, permenantly if need be.

Make it quite clear to the wife that you mean what you say and ther will be big trouble if you find out she is undermining your efforts to put the boy on the straight and narrow.

I certainly cannot guarantee that the above actions will bring about the changes that must be made in order for you to

be at peace in your own home, neither can I guarantee that your wife will not undermine your efforts at every turn.

What I can guarantee you is that after a month (likely less) you will be in no doubt how much or how little resect your wife and kids have for you and then it really is up to you to decide if you want to be the man of the house or simply an inconvienient financial household appliance.

I am sorry if my response seems uncaring, it really isnt meant that way, but after over 20 years of allowing my ex wife to overide my gut instinct on how to deal with one of my step children ( thankfully the other one is quite the opposite) I can assure you that what you will pay ( plenty ) in stress in defining and maintaining the boundaries now will be less than the tip of the iceberg if this situation is allowed to continue for years, until you finally have no choice but to do what you already know needs to be done.

Its a bit like a bad tooth, you have the pain now but it really is up to you to chose if you want to suffer years of pain or go get it pulled once and for all.

Best of luck and dont forget to safeguard your finances before you do anything else

roy gsd

I tried it a few years back, the first several times it work well then it would only work if I was well rested. Well rested usually occured about 4AM, for some reason the wife was not to enthused about the whole idea at 4 in the morning. So you lay there is your tent until it eventually goes away. Not my idea of a well spent $20.

$20? Someones taking the rise out of you ....................

roy gsd

where you are happiest is the answer. do i win a prize.. no amount of money can make you happy, and it cant buy love. having said that i,d rather be miserable with money than without it.

It can certainly buy 'love' in Thailand!

Na, your wrong there, but you cannot buy Love in LOS.

If farangs think of a thai woman as a piece of "property" to be bought or sold then it stands to reason they should not complain if they ignore the property laws in LOS.

Farangs who think they have bought "property" in LOS, are always are disapointed when they learn they have only been leasing the "property" instead of owning it.

Roy gsd

Not to put a damper on your plan, but what if she never used the card except when she was home. Or she gave the card to one of her family or mates in the village to withdraw dosh when she was out of the village for her?

Or even her Thai fella who was getting 3000thb a month in his mitt for lao koa whisky.....

But in all seriousness, well done, good thinking and goodluck!

Hi,

Sorry mate but if I was worried enough to resort to checking up on a woman she would have been history,

Roy gsd

I was lucky to meet an educated, gainfully employed girl in BKK this past year (for ease of readiblity, I'll call her Nat). Since we are in the early stages of our relationship, I know it's nearly impossible to get Nat a tourist visa to come visit me in the states. She does, however, want to visit a long time friend in Michigan. Nat's friend married a farang 13 years ago and for the past 9 years, her and her husband have been living in MI. The two weeks Nat would be spending in the US would be under their roof, entirely supported by her friends. So, while she's on her vacation in the US, we would be able to spend a few days together, even introduce her to a few of my family members. Now for Nat's current situation. I'll bullet them as to help identify Nat's case:

• 30 year old professional woman.
  
• Previously married but now divorced (currently single)
  
• No children
  
• Proficient in English
  
• Gainfully employed (6 years with same Thai company) with a 50K baht monthly income
  
• Respective savings account (close to 500K)
  
• 20 year close relationship with childhood friend.
  
• Notarized letter of invitation from childhood friend to spend the 2 weeks with her family
  
• Copies of friend and friend's husband US passports (both come and visit Thailand often)
  
• Letter of Employment from current employer that states her job function, her high value to the company, and approval of her 2 week vacation holiday.
  
• Passport and tourist visa approvals to Germany for 2 previous vacations (all within 5 years)
  
• Immediate family all live in BKK
  
• Does not own any property accept for her car.
  

I'm really looking any leverage Nat may have as to prove she is not a "risk" to the immigration department and will not over-stay her visa. Nat has decided to use a "visa agency" in Bangkok to help her with this process. So, I have essentially several questions:

• First, what are her chances in getting approval on a tourist visa for 2 weeks from the US Embassy?
  
• Is the "visa agency" worth the 5000 Baht?
  
• Which reason should dominate her answer to the US embassy when they ask her, "Why do you want to come to the US"? (we already know to leave the 'boyfriend' out of story!
  

Again, any advice or help would be appreciated as I know this board has helped other members in the past.

Hi

I am not a US citizen but I think you should put yourself in the shoes of the person processing the application who might ask themselves why this person would need to use an Agent to obtain a visa?

Personally I would leave the Agent out of the equasion, you never reallly know what problems the Embassy may have had with "dubious" visa applications from any Agency and certainly none in LOS are approved by the UK Government as acceptable for inclusion on the statutory body for Visa Agents here in the uk, I would be very suprised if the US Government has any Thai based Agencies on its approved list of competent advisors.

Without membership of an accredited Body that has a code of conduct and is properly regulated any fool can see thmselves up as a visa agent.

Here in the UK they have just introduced a ruling that allows the Authorities to refuse to process another Visa application for up to 10 years if some information on a Visa application is incorrect/economical with the truth/ false, I dont expect the US is any less defensive of its borders.

At least if you do it yourself yo only have yourself to blame if things go wrong, and if they do you will at least be able to explain and correct a genuine error, but if you have no control of what information the Agent has provided to support the application either verbally or in paper form.

I guess you are damned if you do and damned if you dont, but personally this application would be far too important to leave in the hands ofsomeone who I have no recourse against if they act inappropriately as I suspect many in LOS may do.

Best of Luck

roy gsd

All my Aussie friends are bastards, yet I am a Brit and a bastard, so are my American friends.

So that confirms it than, we’re all bastards.

well thats this thread sorted, Next!

roy gsd

I downloaded and watched 'Horton hears a who' with my 8y/o son tonight. He loved it but, as an Oz citizen, I am concerned about the damage done to him.

The animation is good and the story well written; its not 'Animal Farm' but there are plenty of adult level themes in there to keep parents amused. Unfortunately, the use of the kangaroo, the Oz national symbol, to represent the forces of evil is clearly racist.

Na, you aint right, not all Aussies are bastards, just the ones who's parents were not married

I quite like the Aussies, but then I am not a sheep.............LOL

roy gsd

Roy

You are getting us Aussies confused with Kiwi's, they are the ones partial to the odd sheep (only the good looking ones I am told). We moved on from them 2 generations ago.

Now if you were a silver crested cockatoo...then you should be worried (but only if you are a good looking one).

I stand corrected, in my defence it was a kiwi who told me that story LOL

roy gsd

Just a note to thank you gentlemen for your comments Re: Tarakandi.

It is a difficult road to travel and full of twists and turns. More so for Richard, he is the one going to the court proceedings and having to face these people, watch as they one by one get released, boyfriends family living on one of the properties, almost nothing listed as Dale's assets, even though she had nothing when they met. Bank accounts cleared out. It just goes on and on. I would like to know what happened to his dogs at least? I'm sure they are not considered an asset to her? That is what was on his PC desktop...a portrait of the dogs. He loved animals, as trivial as that may sound to some...it would be the least we may accomplish that would make Dale very happy. I am so sickened by all of this. Before the latest news...I booked a trip to Hawaii. I will be accompanied by what remains of our Mom and Dale. Next week they will be in the peaceful waters where we all spent some great happy times. I feel like the ashes we let go of Dale is in a "sea of lies" ...The Andaman Sea.

I lost track a bit about your Lawyer.

Is he good ? or very good ?

He is (should be) the one who can make or brake the case. The family I mentioned in an earlier link had a very good lawyer's office with good connections which is of the utmost importance, although I realize that that particular case was held at the Court in Pattaya and not in the south/Ranong.

Nevertheless it might help to ask for a 2nd or even 3rd opinion....

It might even help to copy-and-paste some of the details from that murdercase and put it under the nose of your Canadian Embassy/Ambassador with a copy to the Canadian Press and Television/Radio......like:

"Many people were in the courtroom when the judge made his statement. Among them were quite a few Dutchmen, who wanted to show their support to the Odekerken family with their presence. The Dutch Ambassador, Mr. Pieter Marres, also attended the session in Pattaya, with a number of his staff members on behalf of the Dutch authorities. Not only brothers and sisters of Jules were present, but also two previous business associates, who were also very close friends to Jules, were there."

From: http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/Murder-Case-...08#entry1642108

Meaning: if the Ambassador of a small country like Holland takes the effort and time to travel a few times (!) to the Courthouse in Pattaya, the staff and/or Ambassador of a country like Canada could do the same.

I fully understand the anger and sadness about this case but it is of the UTMOST IMPORTANCE that you keep on trying to bring this case to the attention of the public, Embassy and your Government in Canada.

Maybe it's the wrong word but Promotion for your case is very important; being angry and writing your messages here doesn't; sorry to say that.

Also: talk to each other about creating a website (like the Odekerken family did) about this tragic murder case and publish ALL articles and important notes. Hire someone local who can make photos of the suspects, wife and others in Ranong....and publish them on your website.

Find someone who is able to create a website for you !

Find someone who is good in public relations...there must be a man or woman in your hometown (from a newspaper/magazine perhaps) who takes the lead in bringing this case to the frontpages all the time; let him/her find a Senator, a Member of Parliament.

Talk to your local Mayor, important Doctors, Surgeons....they are the ones who know more important people.

Just being angry and bitterness doesn't help you bring those people behind bars for the rest of their lives.

LaoPo

Very good posting, sound advice.

I hope the family dont get too distracted/ disheartened by all the distactions that have arisen along the way,

if you remenber one thing in your efforts remember this , " its not the amount of amunition that produces the requred result, if you focus on the target one shot is often enough.

May I respectfully suggest you step back for a moment and review your efforts to date, hopefully you may be able to come up with some other avenues that can help you find justice for your loved one and I hope some degree of peace which as yet you have been cruelly denied.

Tourism is a key income for LOS, anything that succceds in substantially reducing the numbers visiting LOS will not go down with the powers that be, changes dont just happen, people make them happen, good luck to the family in what I am afraid is an uphill struggle but not an impossible one.

roy gsd

A lawyer might cost more than you will gain from persuing it.

Why don't you contact the tourist police and see what they can do for you.

roy gsd

OP i want to smack you for asking a stupid and vague question you sound like a fool

never mind lifeisrandom,

sounds like he is having a bad hair day, or is it the change of life that makes him/her so aggresive?

Or perhaps just a case of old fashioned envy?

roy gsd

I downloaded and watched 'Horton hears a who' with my 8y/o son tonight. He loved it but, as an Oz citizen, I am concerned about the damage done to him.

The animation is good and the story well written; its not 'Animal Farm' but there are plenty of adult level themes in there to keep parents amused. Unfortunately, the use of the kangaroo, the Oz national symbol, to represent the forces of evil is clearly racist.

Na, you aint right, not all Aussies are bastards, just the ones who's parents were not married

I quite like the Aussies, but then I am not a sheep.............LOL

roy gsd

The longer I stay here, the less I understand the Thais.

A few months ago I went to Pattaya Immigration for an re-entry permit. As always I was "dressed for success" wearing a long sleeve white shirt, dress slacks and lace up shoes. When my mumber was up, I presented my self before the immigration officer. I gave him my pass port and with a polite smile greeted him with a "Sawasdee krap." He looked down his nose at me and said for everyone to hear "You no talking. I talking, you no talk!" and gave me the "I'm the boss" look. I shruged to acknowledge his power and we had no further problems.

A few nights ago I stopped at the Nikon Court (hotel above?) bar at the corner of Soi Buakao and Soi Linkee, opposite 7-11. I got myself a Large Leo from the cooler (self service only) and asked the cashier if she could cash a B 1,000 note. In an instant she became irate and yelled "you have small money, I see you have, you pay small money now!" I shrugged and said "just asking" and gave her a B50 note. I don't remember ever having a problem in there before, so maybe it was PMS, I looked like her ex boyfriend or she ia be-atch in general, but she sure unloaded on me.

On the other hand...

There is a little Thai mom and pop restaurant near my condo on Third Rd and they treat me like I am some kind of celebrity. They can't do enough for me and I get to practice my Thai with the other customers. The food is good and the cook beams when I compliment her on her excellent cooking. If its raining, they loan me an umbrella. When I walk in, they insist that I set in a choice seat near a fan, which is directed solely on me.

My landlord is a chinese-thai and he too can't do enough for me. I travel a lot and sometimes I return to my room as many as six or seven days past my rent due date. I always tell him about my travel plans and offer to pay in advance, but he he usually refuses. "Mai pen rai, no problem. I like you too much, you can go every time, pay when you back."

I know Pattaya is not the real Thailand, its just located in the country, but the huge difference in service attitudes blows my mind. It probably makes some difference that I deal with the owners at my condo and local restaurant as opposed to a surly employee at Nikon Court, but still what a difference in behavior. Strange that when I make the extra effort to get along, it goes to hel_l in a handbasket, but when I make no special effort, I'm very well received.

I like it here but I'm not sure I understand everything I know about it

Which is exactly why I choose to live in the uk at present!

Last time I was in los we stayed for 8 months travelling about a bit and we leased an apartment in Bkk fo 6 months as our base, that was two months too long as far as I was concerned, near the six month mark the thai way was getting up my nose and I need to be doing something rather than visiting people and places.

Shopping and drinking Martell ( preferably Remy isnt my favourite ) and coke day in day out gets a bit boring after a while,

ad whilst my wife would love to live in los the fact that farangs are restricted from most enterprises puts me right off the idea for now at least!

I feel sorry for those guys that buy bars in Pataya and sit at the bar night after night bored and often pissed out of their skulls until such time as their finances or g/f -wives run out, not all end up like that I know but that isnt my idea of life.

Mind you I have experienced the same sort of differences in attitude as you discribe in the uk as well so I think the problem is that after a while in disneyland you get bored when the reality sinks in.

roy gsd

A strange topic but all but one Thai Lady I have been to bed with has worn bra, knickers, shorts and a T-shirt or similar.

Is this normal?

Does it stem from so many people sleeping in the same house?

How long (if ever) did it take you to get them to stop, presuming you wanted them to, of course?

Congratulations!

Your post just serve to confirm that asking a very personal question of people you have never met will result in a mass of inormative repllies on this forum, wheras if they were asked the same question by a stranger in a face to face situation it would usually result in a smack in the mouth and likely much worse,LOL.

Its a funny old world........

roy gsd

Actually, if i was asked this question face to face i would be the one getting a slap in the face. From the wife when i answered!

Same, Same, And rightly so!

Roy gsd

Gentlemen, let me inform you of something. Sexy lingerie is uncomfortable, massively uncomfortable. It itches, particularly lace and nylon, it's too cold to sleep in, and what parts of the skin are covered are too warm because it doesn't breathe. Sexy nightclothes are for show, not sleeping.

As for the Basque, I'd like to see you try to sleep in a corset! Sexy lingerie is to be worn under clothing, and once the outer layer of clothing is removed it's not supposed to stay on for much longer. It is not for sleeping.

For the record, I wear a light cotton nightgown, unless it's cold. Then I wear my long flannel nightgown and socks. Back in the northern US in a semi-heated bedroom I wore the flannel nightgown with a t-shirt, knickers and bloomers underneath and socks, too.

So Thai women aren't really any different. They dress for comfort, too.

Hi,

Sorry to say I get the picture,lol,

roy gsd

A strange topic but all but one Thai Lady I have been to bed with has worn bra, knickers, shorts and a T-shirt or similar.

Is this normal?

Does it stem from so many people sleeping in the same house?

How long (if ever) did it take you to get them to stop, presuming you wanted them to, of course?

Congratulations!

Your post just serve to confirm that asking a very personal question of people you have never met will result in a mass of inormative repllies on this forum, wheras if they were asked the same question by a stranger in a face to face situation it would usually result in a smack in the mouth and likely much worse,LOL.

Its a funny old world........

roy gsd

Bar girl and the expat: a killing foretold.

Every year hundreds of Britons leave the UK to marry Thai brides. The perils of such liaisons were revealed last week when retired engineer Ian Beeston was murdered by his wife and her lover. Ian MacKinnon and Andrew Drummond in Suwannaphum investigate a ruthless marriage market in which money can buy beauty but not necessarily love

Ian Mackinnon and Andrew Drummond

Sunday August 17 2008 The Observer , UK.

Andrew Herrington, a retired Birmingham lorry driver who now lives in Thailand, lowered his voice and turned to his companions: 'Well, you know, he married a bar girl. What did he expect?'

Sitting on the ground floor of his home - a two-storey house squatting in a rice paddy in Isan, north-east Thailand - Herrington, aged 51, was talking about his friend and neighbour, Ian Beeston, who was found murdered last weekend after predicting that his Thai wife would kill him.

Beeston, 69, a retired design engineer, had been beaten and stabbed in his house - police say he took seven hours to die. His wife, Wacheerawan, 42, and her Thai lover, Somchit Janong, 48, confessed and have been charged with murder. In bizarre and macabre fashion, Janong even re-enacted for police and photographers the manner in which he had clubbed Beeston to death.

This was no isolated romance that culminated in a tragedy. The British embassy in Bangkok processes the wedding documents of up to 70 couples each week. The requests are almost exclusively from older British men - among 860,000 UK tourists each year - hoping to marry younger Thai women. But for any British man hoping to follow in Beeston's footsteps and build a new better life in Thailand, his death was a stark reminder of how badly things can go wrong.

Three of the group of worried farangs - the Thai term for foreigners - who had gathered in Isan, have invested a hefty chunk of their life's savings building houses nearby on the fringes of Suwannaphum village, deep in Thailand's poorest province, Roi Et. Beeston's house, which swallowed up all of his £250,000 retirement nest egg, was described locally as 'palatial'. Unsurprisingly, in the wake of the killing, a siege mentality has taken hold.

'Wanna' was indeed a bar girl, a prostitute. She met Beeston in a bar in Beach Road, Soi 2, in Pattaya, the garish beach resort in southern Thailand, when he was still coming to the country on holiday. The resort is notorious for go-go and hostess bars with a 'sin city' reputation that surpasses that of Bangkok. Eventually, his marriage having fallen apart, Beeston took early retirement from his job at the Ford motor plant in Dagenham, Essex, and moved to Thailand. In 1999 he married Wanna and paid for her two grown-up children to be put through university.

The good life hit the buffers when he discovered Wanna had secretly sold his Suwannaphum property. As foreigners are barred from owning land in Thailand, he had put everything in her name. All his savings from working as a design engineer, first at Perkins and then at Ford, had gone. Worse, the new owners of his house were agitating to move in. Four months ago a furious Beeston banished Wanna to a corrugated shack in the back garden. Friends feared then that he had signed his own death warrant.

In a letter left with lawyers, Beeston predicted his own grisly fate. 'It is just a matter of time now,' he wrote. 'I am in real fear for my own life.'

Beeston's romance, like so many others involving Western men escaping loneliness at home, began with a stroll down one of the hundreds of neon-lit strips in Thailand's tourist-friendly sex quarters. The ratio of male tourists to Thai women is almost two to one. Walk down Bangkok's Soi Cowboy or Patpong any evening and it is easy to see how masculine fantasy can take flight. Ageing, unprepossessing foreign men are fawned over by lithe young Thai women wearing broad smiles and revealing clothes. The prospective clients are beckoned through curtained doorways to a dimly lit world where bar girls dance suggestively on a tiny stage and strip.

Others chat up the punters in rudimentary English. The price of all this attention is just the cost of a drink for the girl, perhaps a tip. The often unspoken element is that the girl will go back and spend the night at his hotel. Cash is rarely mentioned, and there is no unseemly haggling, but the going rate is little more than a 'present' of £20.

'[The men] are often not the most handsome of all, they are usually in the latter years of their life, they are bald, unattractive and quite lonely in their own little society,' writes Thai anthropologist Dr Yos Santasombat in Hello My Big Big Honey!, an anthology of love letters penned to Bangkok bar girls. 'When they come to Patpong, they're struck with girls who are all over them.'

The appeal of easy, cheap sex is evident the next morning. The same men hold hands with their bar girls skipping down the pavements of Bangkok's tourist haunts. 'Often they extend their relationship for a number of days or weeks or even years,' writes Yos. 'Sometimes the farang himself ends up spending the entire vacation with one girl and sometimes comes back. Sometimes she becomes his mistress or even a wife.'

Romance with a Westerner in such circumstances can come perilously close to a game of mutual exploitation. Nearly all of the girls have flocked to the cities and resorts to escape their own prison: an impoverished existence in Thailand's rural expanses, whereas a night's takings from the city bar could sustain a family for a month. From Isan's desperately poor, rice farming villages, where hunger is the norm, the bars of Bangkok or Pattaya are a welcome escape. For girls with little education they provide an opportunity to shine and have the honour of providing for their families by sending new-found riches back home.

'They do it because it's an easy life,' said John Burdett, a British lawyer-turned-novelist who has interviewed hundreds of bar girls for books such as Bangkok Haunts. 'You don't want to be a subsistence rice farmer. It's very, very hard. Village life's claustrophobic. Bar girl work isn't dirty. It's not strenuous. They don't have dozens of partners; maybe one or two a week. The rest of the time they're getting men to buy drinks and existing on tips. In the village there's a kind of omertà, where no one talks about it. But they send money home to care for people, so they've big status.

'A bar girl in her early or mid-twenties has a 10-year window of opportunity to get out of poverty,' said Burdett. 'So if she spends time with a guy she is using up her chances. She sees that as an investment and she's entitled to something in return. The car and the house may be in her name. In the West we've lost our intuitive understanding of how poverty shapes thinking. So, if after 10 years together the foreigner decides to move out, leaving her with little to show for it, that's a problem. She's lost face and that's terribly important. Her image has been damaged and it might even lead people to kill.'

Stephen Treharne Jones, 63, was a former neighbour of Beeston. Jones met Lamyai, then 32, in a Pattaya bar and sought to 'rescue' her and send her home to Isan. 'When I met my wife, Lamyai , she had nothing,' said Jones. 'I paid her out of a sex bar in Pattaya and told her to go home. When I visited her home she was living in a room with her two children. There was no bathroom or toilet facilities, no doors, no tiles, no electricity, just a mattress and blankets on the floor. So I bought a big home for both of us and bought the land off her relatives.'

Jones's world collapsed when he asked his wife to sell a piece of land he had bought. Lamyai refused, saying it was impossible. Only when he went with a lawyer to the land registry did he discover he never owned it. He bought it from Lamyai's family, but allowed them to keep it in their names because of foreign ownership prohibitions. When challenged, Lamyai threw him out of their luxury villa in Kalasin, an hour from Suwannaphum. Penniless, he scuttled back to King's Lynn, Norfolk, two months ago. He now lives there in sheltered accommodation.

'Looking back now, I know my Thai wife had set me up from day one,' said Jones last week. 'In Kalasin I know of three other foreigners who were kicked out by their wives after they completed property purchases. They say there's no fool like an old fool. But I did genuinely love Lamyai. I was sold a dream, I guess. A quiet life in the country where food and drink was cheap, the women attentive and the weather warm. But that's not the reality. The reality is that one becomes a captive.'

Lamyai has a very different account of the breakdown in relations. 'If Stephen had been a good husband I would not have asked him to leave,' she said. 'But when he argued he called me a thief and a prostitute. We were quite happy for four years, even though he spent a lot of time going out drinking with his farang friends in the area. Stephen had a house he could have lived in all his life if he respected me as his wife, but at the end I was just his servant.'

As his own marriage became a bitter property dispute, Beeston saw trouble coming. Exiled to the garden shed, his wife had installed her lover, Janong, and they kept Beeston a virtual prisoner in his own home with taunts and attacks.

In a letter to his lawyers, Beeston told how his wife had started a money lending business - lending his money - and had paid off local police so she could run an illegal lottery. 'My wife threatened me with a gun,' he said in the letter, detailing a series of attacks on his house involving 'stones, lumps of wood, fireworks and even a tin of paint'. The house was also frequently burgled, he said.

Like so many Britons and other expatriates living in rural Thailand who are unable to converse in Thai, it appears Beeston may have been the unwitting victim of a sting his wife had been waiting for years to bring off. According to his friends, the whole town, even the police chief, knew but nobody said anything. 'I thought she loved me, but she only wanted my money after all,' Beeston had told his Australian neighbour, Bill Lamb.

'He told me he thought his wife was about to kill him,' said Lamb. 'My feeling is that Ian had been paying for Wanna's daughters from a previous marriage to go to university. This year they both graduated. I just don't think he was needed any more. She had it all. To be honest - the life of a foreigner isn't worth much around here.'

Back in Herrington's Suwannaphum house, fists were clenched as the group discussed a fitting revenge for the perpetrators of the callous act. The palpable sentiment was: 'It's them or us.' But the bitter consensus was also that after all the publicity had died down Beeston's wife would be granted bail and freed. 'She's got the money, and with money cases just get dropped,' said Herrington.

Hi,

The reporter is simply promoting the sale of the paper, being economical with the truth is the best way to do that, they all do it and always will.

Tragic as this incident was, it is not exclusive to LOS, it happens everywhere in the world.

Much has been made about the age of the guys married to thai ladies, be sensible, given the choice would you chose a " old Wrinkly" or a "young Smoothy".

Silly question really as there are thousands of old wrinklies at home if that was there choice!

At the end of the day marriage is a big gamble, and most fail at home so why should it be any different in LOS?

Many men each year are murdered by their wives in the uk and other western countries but there the wife knows she only has to claim he has abused her and the legal system usually backs her up to the hilt, I am sure that there are far many cases of older guys getting tied up with ladies in the uk who take them to the cleaners than there is in LOS.

Again given the choice, would u rather marry an old wrinkly ( shudder!) in the uk who is just a likely to be after financial security or marry a younger lady who is equally after a secure future, the risk is just the same in my opinion.

The only difference is if it all goes tits up with an old bird from the uk it is likely he will only have memories of sleeping with an old bird to look back on, at least the older guy with the younger wife hs usually had some pleasure for a few years to look back on.

Cynical? Maybe, but not far from the truth for many I suspect.

By the way my wife is 20 years younger than me and up to date looks after me better than perhaps I deserve, but in all honesty I dont think this is unusual for farang/thai relationships in the main.

If only they came with a mute/volume control button for when she is on the phone to her family all would be perfect, why do they have to raise their voices? Is it just because they are so far away or what?.....................LOL

Dont worry chaps, I am sure your wife loves you too, you know it so bugger what anyone else thinks!

Roy gsd

In Chiang Mai we have fixations about Food (don't even start discussing burgers up there). In Pattaya we seem to have different priorities but as a recent arrival here I am interested in where you like to eat and why. Where are the good pies to be found? Who does the best breakfast in town? Where can I get a good steak, cooked medium rare and not burned to a crisp? Great seafood buffet, top Indian, late night places for noodles. Anyone know where I can get Khao Soi Gai down here?

But first some basic rules:

1) the opinions expressed are personal - what is a great Indian for one may be so so for another. Make allowance for differences in taste and experience

2) I will not allow blatant advertising or spamming by or for business owners.

3) The rules of Thai Visa re acceptable behaviour apply as always. You all know them and if you are unsure they can be found here

bon appetite

CB

What no traditional pie and mash shops in Pattaya yet?

They are very rare in london these days , I am sorry to say.

roy gsd