The week that was in Thailand news: When the “SLAPPs” of the Seventies come home to roost.

[rooster59]

The week that was in Thailand news: When the “SLAPPs” of the Seventies come home to roost.

 

 

“Bloomin’ holligans – bring back military service, that’s what they need”. 

 

Such was the usual cry in 1970s Britain as an older generation looked on alarmingly as a disintegrating society wracked with neglect and disenchantment turned to violence, mostly at football matches.

 

Giving the young miscreants a ‘short, sharp shock” or a much longer stint in the army – where many fathers and mothers had, frankly, enjoyed the time of their lives in the war and its aftermath – was seen as the answer to the ills of power cut, miserably Blighty as the reality of the end of Rule Britannia truly sunk home.

 

So it was that Rooster did his bit for Queen and country donning khaki fatigues and coming to “a….ten…shun” on the parade ground.

 

For me it was thankfully not the regular army – that would have been a bridge too far. I was obliged to enroll in the school Combined Cadet Force after my parents were too scared to speak up and say I was a conscientious objector.

 

But I am proud to say that what passed for my army days – every Wednesday afternoon for two years – made me what I am today.

 

I absolutely loathe authority of any kind – especially anyone who totes a gun. I am not an anarchist – I sided with Thomas More’s warning about the necessity for the law after Roper’s speech in a Man For All Seasons.

 

But I am close. As a father in Thailand – that I have always seen romantically if not practically as a land of freedom – I would tell my children about the CCF. How I wore my soft pyjamas under the green hair shirt and jumper because it was so itchy.

 

And how when I fired a gun the recoil hurt my pansy shoulder.

 

Bossing other people about is not my thing. Even as a schoolteacher I would prefer to let a child off homework if he or she could present a reasoned argument why not to do it.

 

But my love of freedom meant that when my 16 year old mixed race son walked into my office and said he wanted to join the British army I was obliged to acquiesce. He went from cushy Harrow to freezing Harrogate where I surprised him by turning up for his passing out.

 

An injury meant he was demobbed at 18 enabling me to fully return to my state of semi-anarchy.

 

Here in Thailand we have seen the military come and go but always remain. And that is how we find ourselves today with those used to giving orders desperately playing at politics in a manipulative and cynical attempt to cling on to what should not be theirs.

 

This week saw an ever increasing foreboding loom over the nation as brave activists were arrested or turned themselves in. Foremost was former Thammasat rector and historian Charnvit Kasetsiri.

 

Charnvit could tell you hair raising stories of what happened at his alma mater in the 1970s as I was playing toy soldiers in the relative sanctity of South London. Despite attempts to change the history books it remains a dark chapter in Thailand’s potholed road to democracy.

 

This courageous man has been charged with – and I jest not – making unwanted remarks about His Generalness’s wife’s fancy handbag.

 

The historian pointedly said that being called in was just SLAPP – “a Strategic Lawsuit Against Public Participation”.

 

Charnvit, with acronyms like that a man after my own heart, continued:

 

“This is one of many such SLAPP cases. Only rulers in non-democratic regimes refuse to hear criticism. Or fear it, like the sound of the common house gecko, no matter how small”.

 

There again, so eloquently for people who appreciate the portents of geckos, was this unmistakable reference to foreboding. Civil disobedience is very much in the air and while elections are not a magic panacea for the nation’s woes, any further delay could be the catalyst for disaster.

 

Thailand needs the Charnvits of the world while it was also heartening to see the new tourism minister, Weerasak Kowsurat, bring some realism to the table.

 

His assessment is that the tourism boom is a mess with problems swept under the rug over three decades, a lack of infrastructure reform and an unfair distribution of the tourism pie. And most telling of all he admitted that the bureaucracy, not least his own ministry, is unable to see or effect the changes that are desperately required.

 

Effectively the love of money has resulted in being unable to fight the hordes of mostly Chinese tourists on the nation’s beaches.

 

His pessimism, however, was buoyed with an idea that visitors who “see something (should) say something” using the Line application. The problem is that his own staff is, by his own admission, ill-trained and inadequately equipped to follow up complaints and suggestions.

 

Still at least it was a breath of relative fresh air after the stale odor of the 1970s emanating from the dinosaurs of Government House and a welcome change from the previous incumbent.

 

Namely the infamous numpty Khun Kobkarn who thought she could end sex and make money with durian flavored Kit-Kat.

 

With all this foreboding I hope you don’t think that Rooster’s funny bone has taken a walk. There was more than enough to keep news-watchers  amused even in stories that your crowing chicken might call “murder most fowl”.

 

Top of the list was the expected blaming by the Frenchman of the Thai girlfriend and vice versa in the murder of the Italian that still dominated the news. Some news sources suggested Frenchie had been a sniper in the army but his mumsy came out to say he was, like Rooster, just a cadet and that nasty Rujira was a bad influence on Le Petit Johnny.

 

Ugly Rujira was found hiding up a tree – she looked like the worst Soi Cowboy. Perhaps sensibly I resisted the temptation to submit the headline “From Long Gun to Longon” to the editors.

 

The pair have done the customary admissions though one wonders how it all could have been different if monsieur had taken the hint after she sliced him from forehead to nose.

 

Incredibly after the reenactments, Phichit plod – who did well in this case - allowed them to have one last kiss before Grapao  and Gauloise are replaced by decades of Gruel.

 

Heartening also, was the news that fraudster Lady Kai is getting longer and longer sentences. She now faces 18 years most of which is made up by her pretending to be a princess. That heinous crime aside she could well face 20 plus when she comes up on the charge of making false complaints against the student Koi who bravely broke the story by going to a human rights lawyer in 2016.

 

Totally predictable this week was the news that the sale of the British Embassy in Bangkok would fetch a record 420 million Blighty sobs.

 

What remains of the British consular staff – a gay ambassador on a Far East jolly and a couple of cleaners – will now be economically housed in a tower block closet in Sathorn.

 

But it all seemed irrelevant – don’t you have to contact New Delhi now if you are sufficiently barking to want to get into the UK?

 

The Grauniad told us that the Foreign Office will use the money to decorate the embassy in Washington. Frankly it is a bloody disgrace that they would profit from what was essentially a gift in the 1920s and give nothing of any substance back to Thailand.

 

Yes, Rooster has never been a fan of the FCO, not since they employed a German woman at Wireless Road whose sole purpose was to stop bona-fide applicants getting into Britain. This was in stark contrast to my experiences with the Thais who on a famous occasion in the consulate in Penang decided to “help out someone who appreciates Thailand” by stamping the observations’ page in my full passport after the British consul in KL had refused to allow its use over the phone citing “regulations”.

 

Redressing the balance about “Hated Germans” was the enlightening story of the “Most Holy German in Thailand” a monk of 20 years residence who has become a preceptor after passing the Buddhist Bar exams.

 

It led to my favorite quip of the week from forum wag “Thaiwrath”, who, referring to Herr Phra climbing up the Sangha ladder, remarked:

 

“I climbed up the Singha ladder instead, maybe took the wrong road”.

 

This reminded me of when “One Night in Bangkok” was playing in every city bar. A girl, proud that her English was good enough to grasp some of the lyrics came up to sing one of the lines for me:

 

“You’ll find a God in every golden Kloster….”

 

 And so to this week’s Rooster awards. “Teacher of the Week” goes to two ajarns who succeeded in actually keeping the nation’s youngsters awake. Maths teacher Khru Effy did it by putting on pink earmuffs and crown rimmed pink sunnies while uni lecturer Ajarn Yanin did some scholarly gyrations to the BNK48 girlie band.

 

Whatever you have to do – being a teacher once I DO understand….

 

While the “You’re ‘Avin’ a Laff” award goes to Brit Graham Briar who expects us to send him money for his heart operation after he bought a new motorbike and reportedly spent a million baht on a golf membership.

 

Wasting 13 minutes of my life watching his bANAL YouTube channel had me agreeing with the poster who had left a comment that Mr Briar would be one of those people who pretended to be a woman to get in a lifeboat on the sinking Titanic.

 

Finally, in a week when I was delighted to make the news myself by winning the Thai National Crossword Puzzle Championships, it was a beautiful yet telling misspelling that caught my eye on the forum.

 

In reference to the filthy murderers of the Italian, a poster had used a term that might one day feature in a crossword clue:

 

10 Across: A thoroughly disagreeable and potentially violent expatriate (9 letters).

A “psychopat”.

 

Rooster

 

 

-- © Copyright Thai Visa News 2018-02-03

[gamini]

This is a really nice, informative and amusing post. A  far cry from the ignorant mentally sick Thai bashers on this forum. Rooster has a good real knowledge this country. More of these kinds of posts, please

[50baht]

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire".

W.C.

[car720]

19 hours ago, rooster59 said:

This courageous man has been charged with – and I jest not – making unwanted remarks about His Generalness’s wife’s fancy handbag.

does anyone still seriously believe that men control the world?

[car720]

19 hours ago, rooster59 said:

Finally, in a week when I was delighted to make the news myself by winning the Thai National Crossword Puzzle Championships,

how do they have a crossword puzzle in Thai?

[Jane Dough]

2 hours ago, car720 said:

how do they have a crossword puzzle in Thai?

The country is Thailand....the puzzle is in English.....

[Lucky mike]

Maybe psychopat could be from Irish descent ?

 

Mad Irishman !

Edited February 4, 2018 by Lucky mike
Addition

[nausea]

On 03/02/2018 at 4:57 PM, rooster59 said:

“Bloomin’ holligans – bring back military service, that’s what they need”. 

I agree; send the miscreants into the army, make them as hard as nails, and teach them how to use weapons. What could go wrong?

[Jeremy50]

A little harsh on Graham, I find his videos rather bucolic and relaxing, certainly not banal. But as  you sent your son to Harrow, I doubt you will ever find yourself financially embarrassed in the face of adversity. The school [Dulwich College probably] CCF made you the man you are today? Seriously?

[Jane Dough]

2 hours ago, Jeremy50 said:

A little harsh on Graham, I find his videos rather bucolic and relaxing, certainly not banal. But as  you sent your son to Harrow, I doubt you will ever find yourself financially embarrassed in the face of adversity. The school [Dulwich College probably] CCF made you the man you are today? Seriously?

Rooster worked at Harrow...so his children studied free. He failed the exams for Dulwich and was obliged to attend their poorer cousin. The CCF made Rooster despise authority, especially those with weapons. Seriously. If you would like some adversity stay tuned for articles over the next few years...more will be revealed to the faithful who may care to follow the column.

[The manic]

7 hours ago, nausea said:

I agree; send the miscreants into the army, make them as hard as nails, and teach them how to use weapons. What could go wrong?

And how to plan, manage and organise crimes such as bank robberies. 

[car720]

On 2/4/2018 at 4:16 PM, Jane Dough said:

The country is Thailand....the puzzle is in English.....

Really?  Wow!!!!

I would never have guessed that.

[GarryP]

8 hours ago, car720 said:

Really?  Wow!!!!

I would never have guessed that.

Yet you asked the question. 

[car720]

3 hours ago, GarryP said:

Yet you asked the question. 

That is true.

I can be such a silly billy at times.

[Artisi]

On ‎4‎/‎02‎/‎2018 at 5:30 PM, Lucky mike said:

Maybe psychopat could be from Irish descent ?

 

Mad Irishman !

Wouldn't that be psychomick?