ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 My wife says I was an animal in bed last night. (What exactly is a sloth?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted May 1, 2022 I was in the bank yesterday in our town centre, when the woman behind the counter started singing "Downtown". I thought to myself, "What a peculiar clerk." 1 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 I've just started a company manufacturing over-sized sinks... Does anyone on here mind if I give it a massive plug? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 I kept hearing music coming from upstairs, then I found my printer was jamming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 There is a rumour that the government is to allow the public to purchase Botox on line - ha, that's going to raise a few eyebrows. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 I'm writing a book about hurricanes and tornados. It's only a draft at the moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 Last night, I saw this bloke sneaking around my garden wearing a rugby shirt, golfing slacks, tennis shoes and a pair of goalkeepers gloves. "Hey!" I shouted, "What's your game?" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 I hated school sports days as a kid. My mate Andy Zoff always won. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 When I went to America I was going to visit a theme park that had the world's largest pool table. But didn't go in the end, the cues were massive. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender missionary. I've baked 'em, I've roasted 'em, I've stewed 'em, I've barbequed 'em, I've even tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender." The second cannibal asks, "What kind of missionary do you use?" The other replied, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and their sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads." "Ah ha!" he replies. "No wonder.. those are friars!" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DezLez Posted May 1, 2022 Share Posted May 1, 2022 (edited) 5 hours ago, ballpoint said: "Ah ha!" he replies. "No wonder.. those are friars!" Did they get "tucked in" with Maid Marion and get Robin's delight without a Nottingham Sheriff's ban? I await "all aquiver" for your pointed responses and do not mind being shafted in the process as "Maid Marion" screamed for the Friar to &uck her in bed again with his sturdy shaft! Edited May 1, 2022 by DezLez Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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