Punch Up

[Mai Krap]

Keep a level head but watch your back, you can never underestimate complete morons.

[sceadugenga]

Your wife's family should take immediate steps to put your (their) side of the story to the Puyai Ban and possibly the local police.

Try to do do this before your drunken antagonist gets in ahead of you.

Your position as a farang is somewhat precarious, especially in the current political climate.

I hesitate to suggest this, but depending on the situation, a little cash in the right palms might not go adrift - but let the family handle this as they see fit.

Good luck

The Puyai Ban has been made aware of the incident,she was also previously aware of the problem with the cows as was the village assistant Puyai Ban who came to inspect damage earlier in the day.

By the way it is in the family,the guy is my brother in law, I unfortunately married into a family with a long history of fueds, up till now I have been able to keep my cool ,even when the wife was assaulted by her elder and bigger sister.

At near 70 yrs old I thought I was beyond reacting as I did but you never know your reaction when threatened by a much younger drunk guy.

It appears that your wife's sister and her husband consider they are not being shown the necessary respect that they should receive from a younger female family member. What may only have been a simple matter of their cows grazing on your land has got out of hand.

Family respect is a big thing amongst Thais, my wife is the youngest daughter but has a lot of pull in the family because of contributions made through her career and me. This wouldn't be the first time a younger daughter has made waves in the family by turning up with a rich Farang and started telling people what to do.

How is your position in the family? Do you employ relatives of your wife? Have you been an asset to the village by buying what ever you can locally? What about family parties? I put on about four a year where every one gets legless at my expense.

People are now weighing up your benefit to the family as opposed to the disadvantages. What do your wife's father and older brothers think of you and about this incident? They should certainly be in a position to stop any further aggravation from a sister's husband.

This won't apply if the family is totally dysfunctional ofcourse but that's unusual in a village society.

As an after thought, how good is your Thai? Are you sure you're getting ALL the information here? there can be a lot lost in translations sometimes.

[The Skipper]

Next time, handle it "Thai Style".

Smile, wait a few months, make it look like an accident.

[ozzydom]

Maybe a bit of background info would be appropriate here,Someone mentioned "disfunctional family" and on reflection that may well be a very true asessment .

My wife and I used to reside in Chiang Mai but travelled here every month or so as our daughter was still at school,The Matriarch (wifes Mum ) lived here at the wifes old house so I had alterations done to make the place more comfortable for them.

The old girl suddenly decided to go live with her eldest daughter so we moved to the village.

About this time the family got into strife financially as the old girl had allowed a niece to borrow over 200k against her farm (20 rai ) but the repayments were two yrs in arrears so the goldshop was going to repossess. Incidentally the old girl had not used the farm for years and as is the case it was to be divvied up after her death.

I suggested that the family all toss in about 35k ea and the old girl give them all their 3rai ,they all loved the idea but didnt want to pay as they would get it for nix after she died, they could not see that there wouldnt be any land to inherit if the goldshop foreclosed.

They wanted the farang to pick up the tab, so not being a complete idiot, I said ok on I will buy 2rai at 100k per as long as the land is subdivided now and titles issued.

this meant the wife would get 3rai + the 2 rai we bought and the others all get their 3rai, terrific ,they said so thats what transpired,but since then its been a continuous brawl ,you know, your blocks better than our block ,you moved the survey peg. one sister is the chief shit stirrer and I cant see her changing her personality ,every body picked the block they wanted initially so it was their choice.

They cut down each others trees, divert storm water on to each others blocks, we even gave the brother in law (the one I knuckled) 1/4 rai to put an access road to his block after he had a blue with the elder sister and she refused him access across her land.

I get on well with the villagers generally and give a lot of employment to them, its like the old saying ,"you can pick your friends but not your family"

[dave111223]

Well I had better bring you all up to speed ,I was summoned to the Police station at5.30 pm and just left.

The guy I biffed turned up and demanded 10k compensation +500 bt to cover the 5 stitches he had over his eye, I had already given my version of events when he eventually arrived ,still pissed as a newt.

The policeman sent us outside while he interviewed the guy and after an hour called us back and said the guy would settle for 3k.

I asked the policeman ,what law allows a drunk to come on our property ,pick a blue and want payment when he comes up second best. Mr.P says you should have rung us, I said ,if he hadnt gone for the machete I wouldnt have decked him,Mr P says again you should have rung us,so I gave the argument away at that point

Any way the wife says ok we will pay you but we want damages of 5k for the mess your cows did to the pond walls at which point he says I want to ring my daughter in Bangkok.

Mr P rings her and gives her the gist of things and she tells him 1500bt and call it quits,the wife says ok (she was hungry and wanted out of there.

So what money actually changed hands? Did you end up getting anything for the damages his cow did?

[The Skipper]

"...but since then its been a continuous brawl ,you know, your blocks better than our block ,you moved the survey peg.....

They cut down each others trees, divert storm water on to each others blocks, we even gave the brother in law (the one I knuckled) 1/4 rai to put an access road to his block after he had a blue with the elder sister and she refused him access across her land."

Sounds pretty typical...Get the hel_l outta there. This will drag on forever.

[ozzydom]

Well I had better bring you all up to speed ,I was summoned to the Police station at5.30 pm and just left.

The guy I biffed turned up and demanded 10k compensation +500 bt to cover the 5 stitches he had over his eye, I had already given my version of events when he eventually arrived ,still pissed as a newt.

The policeman sent us outside while he interviewed the guy and after an hour called us back and said the guy would settle for 3k.

I asked the policeman ,what law allows a drunk to come on our property ,pick a blue and want payment when he comes up second best. Mr.P says you should have rung us, I said ,if he hadnt gone for the machete I wouldnt have decked him,Mr P says again you should have rung us,so I gave the argument away at that point

Any way the wife says ok we will pay you but we want damages of 5k for the mess your cows did to the pond walls at which point he says I want to ring my daughter in Bangkok.

Mr P rings her and gives her the gist of things and she tells him 1500bt and call it quits,the wife says ok (she was hungry and wanted out of there.

So what money actually changed hands? Did you end up getting anything for the damages his cow did?

NO, the police stay out of that, it is dealt with by the village headman (or lady in our case) .I have two locals raking and re-sowing Rucci grass as I post, I have told the wife that if /when they come in again to leave them and get the village boss to come see, maybe having to pay on the spot compensation will make them see the error of their ways

[jackr]

Very nasty family you got over there...........

You should ask for one of those red boxes,you pay a monthly amount,so the police come and checks your place daily if everything is allright.It scares people of,when they see the box ,they know the police comes and checks,they know your situation,make them come official so they have to do their job properly.

Leaving the place is no solution either. It would mean tremendous loss of face.

Who gives a smeg about loss of face when perhaps one's life is at stake from psychotics?... you wouldn't be there to experience it anyway if you were bothered about it. The adopted family may get some flack but that's down to them, eh.

I do like the bull suggestion, although he'd probably make more of a mess than the cows.

Hope it goes well Od

[aussiestyle1983]

Very nasty family you got over there...........

You should ask for one of those red boxes,you pay a monthly amount,so the police come and checks your place daily if everything is allright.It scares people of,when they see the box ,they know the police comes and checks,they know your situation,make them come official so they have to do their job properly.

Leaving the place is no solution either. It would mean tremendous loss of face.

Who gives a smeg about loss of face when perhaps one's life is at stake from psychotics?.

Agreed.

You are a farang aren't you? So why would you loose something you don't believe in? Unless you believe in saving face because you have been here to long.

You are from a rich/ sucessful country where face is not an issue. Why would you want to be like someone from a poor third world country which has not contriduted much to the modern world? Im sure the whole face saving issue is an issue that has contributed to this country's lack of success.

Don't lower your standards and start worring about face, do what is best for you and your family, you are not Thai so who cares what they think. If you have to move or do something else to protect you and your family, then do so, do whatever it takes regardless of what the Thais think. Remember, after all, the thais may think that you have lost face, but you are still the rich farang to them.

[garro]

Ozzydom, I think there is something in the air at the moment. I too am now having problems regarding land and neighbours, but not as serious as you seem to be having. Mind you the problem only started yeasterday so there is plenty of time to escalate.

We have been renting a house in our village for the last two and a half years but decided to build our own place; especially since my wife's family gave us some land (about 1 ngan). We begun about a month ago with about a 120 truck loads of soil to rise us above flood level. Everything was going great until my wife's sister came back and informed us that the land needed to be divided in three ( two other members of the family). I thought fair enough even though it would mean redoing a lot of work. My wife was upset about all this though. In the end we decided to buy another third of the land for 30,000. I wanted to make things more legal though by getting the Grom Tii Din to change everything to my wife's name as I don't want arguments in the future.

Yesterday we began building a wall in order to keep the new soil from being washed away and to keep us safe from floods. The problem began when we found that the neighbour's fence is completely crooked and is actually an arc instead of a straight line. This means that we either build the wall in an arc shape or lose quite a bit of land. My wife mentioned this to the neighbours who have completely taken it the wrong way and refuse to listen to any suggestions. Five of them turned up this morning complaining and not listening to a word anyone said.

I have accepted that we will probably lose the land but the the argument still continues. Apparently the Grom Tii Din will not be able to register the land in my wife's name until this is settled and we need to stop work on our wall.

Edited February 25, 2007 by garro

[tijnebijn]

Ozzydom, I think there is something in the air at the moment. I too am now having problems regarding land and neighbours, but not as serious as you seem to be having. Mind you the problem only started yeasterday so there is plenty of time to escalate.

We have been renting a house in our village for the last two and a half years but decided to build our own place; especially since my wife's family gave us some land (about 1 ngan). We begun about a month ago with about a 120 truck loads of soil to rise us above flood level. Everything was going great until my wife's sister came back and informed us that the land needed to be divided in three ( two other members of the family). I thought fair enough even though it would mean redoing a lot of work. My wife was upset about all this though. In the end we decided to buy another third of the land for 30,000. I wanted to make things more legal though by getting the Grom Tii Din to change everything to my wife's name as I don't want arguments in the future.

Yesterday we began building a wall in order to keep the new soil from being washed away and to keep us safe from floods. The problem began when we found that the neighbour's fence is completely crooked and is actually an arc instead of a straight line. This means that we either build the wall in an arc shape or lose quite a bit of land. My wife mentioned this to the neighbours who have completely taken it the wrong way and refuse to listen to any suggestions. Five of them turned up this morning complaining and not listening to a word anyone said.

I have accepted that we will probably lose the land but the the argument still continues. Apparently the Grom Tii Din will not be able to register the land in my wife's name until this is settled and we need to stop work on our wall.

another great story,you see it everywhere,the boundaries expand a lot.If on the paper it is your wifes ground,the administration who handles this can make work of it.You should from the backdoor talk to these people about this problem and ask them what they think is right,maybe they come with their own suggestion.

many thais have one dear problem,greed,so like you said the wife should make the ground come on her name first.You could make a fence so the neighbours have a free one,and you are away from the problem,it is your wifes ground ,you even paid for it,crazy world.

[ozzydom]

Ozzydom, I think there is something in the air at the moment. I too am now having problems regarding land and neighbours, but not as serious as you seem to be having. Mind you the problem only started yeasterday so there is plenty of time to escalate.

We have been renting a house in our village for the last two and a half years but decided to build our own place; especially since my wife's family gave us some land (about 1 ngan). We begun about a month ago with about a 120 truck loads of soil to rise us above flood level. Everything was going great until my wife's sister came back and informed us that the land needed to be divided in three ( two other members of the family). I thought fair enough even though it would mean redoing a lot of work. My wife was upset about all this though. In the end we decided to buy another third of the land for 30,000. I wanted to make things more legal though by getting the Grom Tii Din to change everything to my wife's name as I don't want arguments in the future.

Yesterday we began building a wall in order to keep the new soil from being washed away and to keep us safe from floods. The problem began when we found that the neighbour's fence is completely crooked and is actually an arc instead of a straight line. This means that we either build the wall in an arc shape or lose quite a bit of land. My wife mentioned this to the neighbours who have completely taken it the wrong way and refuse to listen to any suggestions. Five of them turned up this morning complaining and not listening to a word anyone said.

I have accepted that we will probably lose the land but the the argument still continues. Apparently the Grom Tii Din will not be able to register the land in my wife's name until this is settled and we need to stop work on our wall.

Fully understand where your coming from Garro, been there ,done that, Instance,We bought the house block adjoining our house from an elder sister,only because she was skint of cash.The night before the surveyers came evil sister whose house block adjoins said block moved the posts to steal 2 metres of our purchase and then told all and sundry how she had dudded the farang,we said nothing, did nothing.

Then she had a tractor dig a drain so that the village storm water instead of going into her fish pond /resevoir ran down the side of our access road eroding about 2 metres of the 2metre high road we had put in when we excavated the first fish pond,we said nothing ,I just had a new 150 metres of concrete post and barbed wire fence erected on our boundry with evil sister then we boxed and poured a 60cm wall along the base of the fence,now when the rain comes the water she diverted to give us aggro will instead erode her land, its a bit like chess she dreams up grief and I countermove,

The stormwater is the product of the whole village and I approached the village head re piping the water to the Klong, but she reckons she had already asked the villagers about contributing to that scheme, the reply "not my problem".

Her suggestion " live with it or block the water and make it go someone elses land"

Thats Thai mentality for you.

As for all this talk of "FACE" , that may be the case in middle-class Thailand, but in village life I see no sign of it. But jealusy is the main contributor to village problems.

The majority of village Thais are basically lazy,they harvest their rice ,then lay in their hammocks until next planting season comes, the odd hard working Thai who does two crops a year and doesnt hide his head in a whisky bottle every day is scorned as "stingy".

[aussiestyle1983]

the odd hard working Thai who does two crops a year and doesnt hide his head in a whisky bottle every day is scorned as "stingy".

That is so sad to hear. Just another example of how backwards some people are here....................

[dave111223]

Fully understand where your coming from Garro, been there ,done that, Instance,We bought the house block adjoining our house from an elder sister,only because she was skint of cash.The night before the surveyers came evil sister whose house block adjoins said block moved the posts to steal 2 metres of our purchase and then told all and sundry how she had dudded the farang,we said nothing, did nothing.

Then she had a tractor dig a drain so that the village storm water instead of going into her fish pond /resevoir ran down the side of our access road eroding about 2 metres of the 2metre high road we had put in when we excavated the first fish pond,we said nothing ,I just had a new 150 metres of concrete post and barbed wire fence erected on our boundry with evil sister then we boxed and poured a 60cm wall along the base of the fence,now when the rain comes the water she diverted to give us aggro will instead erode her land, its a bit like chess she dreams up grief and I countermove,

The stormwater is the product of the whole village and I approached the village head re piping the water to the Klong, but she reckons she had already asked the villagers about contributing to that scheme, the reply "not my problem".

Her suggestion " live with it or block the water and make it go someone elses land"

Thats Thai mentality for you.

As for all this talk of "FACE" , that may be the case in middle-class Thailand, but in village life I see no sign of it. But jealusy is the main contributor to village problems.

The majority of village Thais are basically lazy,they harvest their rice ,then lay in their hammocks until next planting season comes, the odd hard working Thai who does two crops a year and doesnt hide his head in a whisky bottle every day is scorned as "stingy".

Sounds like a great place to live...

[StickKettleOn]

I feel concenred for the OP - not in terms of danger, as I feel that he has nothing to worry about. I am more concerned about the por sod's quality of life. Way too much resposibility and way too much hard work. Even such a kind hearted thing as buying the sisters house (who was skint) has caused him grief with the storm water thing.... just another little mission/problem he has up there, which seems one of many. Why on earth dont you just clear out, move to a village 3 hours away, build a house in the coutryside with no neighbors and no hassle? You have way to much <deleted> to deal with from these fools you regard as fammily and it will get no better. For 'get no better', read; life will get harder.

The more stories i read such as this, the more I conclude that the Thai's are bloody simple minded people - petulant children, the lot of them.

Edit - no disrespect intended to OP, regarding 'fammily of fools' comment. Just feel for you dude, thats all.

Edited February 25, 2007 by StickKettleOn

[tijnebijn]

I think the face thing is a part of thai life,but I think that the middle class,who can think more further,they just do not care that much,cause they can provide all they need themselves,the poore do not want loose face to them!!it is the other way around.Like ozzy said,seems in the local area they not seem to care to much,I think also this face thing is only on the outside and not in particular in daily life.If it was why everything is going so complicated anyway.Everybody just got to have common sense,that is the main thing people,if you need any,support you or not.The games shit,if played, comes only back(negatively),my family does not play at all,thats why their are no problems coming in anyway.it really is a buddhist filosophy almost.

The face thing is most about jealousy and greed,if it is different then they want ,the face comes into play.My wife always says when you know you do good,then heres no worrie about what anybody has to say about that,what the heck!Like good karma coming back,people do bad comes back to them eventually,end of story!!!!

[goldfish]

Can I hear a banjo playing in the background?

[Bonaparte]

Hi

Put your diplomatic hat on and eat humble pie, lots of it. If you cannot then move to a new location and a new province, unless you are an insomniac, revenge attack being planned now I expect.

Go buy a couple bottle's and appoligise, say you have never had a fight before and landed two very lucky punche's. Get the wife and family to organise a feast and entertain him and family, make him feel the head man of the village.

May seem over the top but if you want to live and sleep there then thats the way of it, he has lost face big time in his village.

Enjoy the memory of putting him in his place, GOOD ON YA.

[ColPyat]

As for all this talk of "FACE" , that may be the case in middle-class Thailand, but in village life I see no sign of it. But jealusy is the main contributor to village problems.

Sorry, but i have to disagree with you very much.

Gathereing from the background information you have given us here, there are clear face issues involved, especially your lack of face. You have a history of having allowed people to step over your head, exploit you financially, which after gradual increase has so far culminated in the latest incident. And i fear that this will escalate further.

You have to find a way to make certain of the hirarchies involved, if it is not too late at this point.

Jealousy may be the main contributer, but your lack of face makes it only possible in the first place that people behave that way to you.

If you want to remain in that village you will have to start thinking very hard what you are going to do. But i fear that any possible solution now will be too risky to undertake now. I have learned here very early that any such conflict has to be stopped at the beginning, even if that means taking a personal risk, in order to avoid a situation coming up that you have to face now.

If people know that you are ready to back up your position, than people will support you. If you have shown that your opponents can get away with things, it will be very difficult to get back into a position of having support.

[lannarebirth]

As for all this talk of "FACE" , that may be the case in middle-class Thailand, but in village life I see no sign of it. But jealusy is the main contributor to village problems.

Sorry, but i have to disagree with you very much.

Gathereing from the background information you have given us here, there are clear face issues involved, especially your lack of face. You have a history of having allowed people to step over your head, exploit you financially, which after gradual increase has so far culminated in the latest incident. And i fear that this will escalate further.

You have to find a way to make certain of the hirarchies involved, if it is not too late at this point.

Jealousy may be the main contributer, but your lack of face makes it only possible in the first place that people behave that way to you.

If you want to remain in that village you will have to start thinking very hard what you are going to do. But i fear that any possible solution now will be too risky to undertake now. I have learned here very early that any such conflict has to be stopped at the beginning, even if that means taking a personal risk, in order to avoid a situation coming up that you have to face now.

If people know that you are ready to back up your position, than people will support you. If you have shown that your opponents can get away with things, it will be very difficult to get back into a position of having support.

I think you're both right. Not so much about "face" in the village, but you do have to address evry grievance immediately and in a strong manner, or things get away from you.

A couple of weeks ago, a couple of guys in our village went on to our land and cut up some teak logs we had. They were observed by our Tai Yai laborer, who promptly phoned us. My gorlfriend was immediately on the phone to the puyai ban and we were due to meet him the next day. When we went out there, EVERY single person in the village knew what was going on. The puyai called in the men. my gf basically eviscerated them (no face concerns at all) and told them the person that hired them was laughing at them now for doing his dirty work for them. You never saw faces so long as on these two. I pulled my gf off after about 15 minutes and I gained a little face (who cares) for doing so. the puyai asked what she wanted to do, and she said nothing, as they have to live with their shame and the knowledge that someone else, who hired them was laughing at them. We of course knew who hired them, but chose not to draw them in. They know we know, he knows we know, and funnily, that seems to be enough. Lots of sniles and wais now, but who knows what's behind it.

BTW, a week later a local group tried to pin our laborer with carrying a gun. He doesn't posses one and never has. My gf jumped in immediately and forcefully and they backed off. finally, I think our Tai Yai workers are gaining some grudging respect in the village, but we'll see how it develops.

I

[ColPyat]

My gorlfriend was immediately on the phone to the puyai ban and we were due to meet him the next day. When we went out there, EVERY single person in the village knew what was going on. The puyai called in the men. my gf basically eviscerated them (no face concerns at all) and told them the person that hired them was laughing at them now for doing his dirty work for them. You never saw faces so long as on these two. I pulled my gf off after about 15 minutes and I gained a little face (who cares) for doing so. the puyai asked what she wanted to do, and she said nothing, as they have to live with their shame and the knowledge that someone else, who hired them was laughing at them. We of course knew who hired them, but chose not to draw them in. They know we know, he knows we know, and funnily, that seems to be enough. Lots of sniles and wais now, but who knows what's behind it.

Yeps, perfect solution, face gained, and the influental person was not made loose face enough by directly pointing fingers and demanding retribution, which would have meant that he would have to think hard how to regain face, which is a conflict very difficult to win.

[ozzydom]

Back down, eat humble pie, move out!!!!!!!!! Get a life,,,,

A guy comes on our property ,picks a fight and comes off second best,even in Thailand there is right and wrong and in this case I am right.

I may be nearing 70 but I still weigh the same as I did at 18, I still get a kick out of seeing 200k on my CBR and I still make love 4 times a week .

Old I may be,senile I,m not and back down I dont, especially when I feel I,m in the right.

Incidentally, we just went for a walk around the village and encountered only the friendliness we usually receive ,with more than the usual invites to sit and take food or talk.

Of course these were not from the protaginists but from more distant relly,s and friends.

[taxexile]

some very interesting stories on this thread , and some very interesting replies as to how to deal with the problems encountered by outsiders trying to live within a society that is bound by ( to many of us) strange and illogical rules where nobody is really called to account for their actions in case they lose face and where the police would rather not get involved , how different to western society where minor misdeeds can get you hauled up in court and your picture on the front page of every newspaper in the country.

i feel sorry for the main posters here who have encountered difficulties , they seem to have done right by their families , yet have been taken advantage of by ignorant , scheming , jealous and nasty relatives. the comment " i have dudded the falang" seems to be typical of the mindset of a lot of people in this country.

its all very medieval , when your peace is threatened by neanderthals he11 bent on revenge for no other reason than "face" or "getting one over on the falang" then i think its time to rethink your options and consider re locating to a place where these conflicts are less likely to occur.

as westerners , we usually have the law to back us up in disputes , and mediation by unbiased police and a fair court system , here you have to "purchase" a bank of allies , favours and credits to be used when necessary.

if you are born thai then all this comes naturally , but for an outsider it can be a hard education.

city dwellers can face problems too , my wifes family were involved in a vehicle access dispute to their land in central bangkok , the dispute could not be settled by discussion and subsequent court cases and appeals came to nothing due to some connection between our adversary and the appeal court judge , even though the written law was on our side.

i wish the posters with problems luck in sorting them out.

[lannarebirth]

its all very medieval , when your peace is threatened by neanderthals he11 bent on revenge for no other reason than "face" or "getting one over on the falang" then i think its time to rethink your options and consider re locating to a place where these conflicts are less likely to occur.

as westerners , we usually have the law to back us up in disputes , and mediation by unbiased police and a fair court system , here you have to "purchase" a bank of allies , favours and credits to be used when necessary.

It's no so bad really. Just takes a different approach in dealing with matters. It's important to remember, when one ventures into village life, that most everyone there is related in some fashion. There may be <deleted> amongst them, but when dealing with outsiders, they are their <deleted>. I think an approach that is vigilant, strong, and at times merciful seems to work the best. A good puyai ban helps (which not all are). Anyway, the objective it seems to me is to either be accepted into the fold, be too big to touch, or to be seen as not being worth the trouble that will come if messed with. Anyway, you're always going to lose the first battle. How you deal with it determines if and how many more you will lose.

My girlfriend is friends with the new provincil governor and police chief here, as well as many local royals. She believes it's best to drag them out there to village events to show how BIG you are to nip these things in the bud. I don't like that style, and have thusfar dissuaded her, but I'm not sure she's wrong. It's nice to know they're there if you need them though. Things seem to be going very well now, and I'm hopeful that will remain the case.

[kmart]

some very interesting stories on this thread , and some very interesting replies as to how to deal with the problems encountered by outsiders trying to live within a society that is bound by ( to many of us) strange and illogical rules where nobody is really called to account for their actions in case they lose face and where the police would rather not get involved , how different to western society where minor misdeeds can get you hauled up in court and your picture on the front page of every newspaper in the country.

i feel sorry for the main posters here who have encountered difficulties , they seem to have done right by their families , yet have been taken advantage of by ignorant , scheming , jealous and nasty relatives. the comment " i have dudded the falang" seems to be typical of the mindset of a lot of people in this country.

its all very medieval , when your peace is threatened by neanderthals he11 bent on revenge for no other reason than "face" or "getting one over on the falang" then i think its time to rethink your options and consider re locating to a place where these conflicts are less likely to occur.

as westerners , we usually have the law to back us up in disputes , and mediation by unbiased police and a fair court system , here you have to "purchase" a bank of allies , favours and credits to be used when necessary.

if you are born thai then all this comes naturally , but for an outsider it can be a hard education.

city dwellers can face problems too , my wifes family were involved in a vehicle access dispute to their land in central bangkok , the dispute could not be settled by discussion and subsequent court cases and appeals came to nothing due to some connection between our adversary and the appeal court judge , even though the written law was on our side.

i wish the posters with problems luck in sorting them out.

True. Its all still very feudalistic and primitive in most rural parts of the country, but expect similar lack of legal protection in any dispute anywhere else here too.

I hope the OP sorts that problem out, asap; and he encounters no further problems. It worries me because a lot of Thais can exhibit a lot of creativity, persistence, and lateral thinking in matters of revenge.

[garro]

Wouldn't it be great if they had that reality show 'Neighbours From hel_l' set here in Thailand? I would definitely watch it.

Edited February 25, 2007 by garro

[lannarebirth]

Wouldn't it be great if they had that reality show 'Neighbours From hel_l' set here in Thailand? I would definitely watch it.

It's all relative isn't it? Until my home is constructed in the village, I will reside in a moo ban which is about 60% - 70% farang. Neighborly chats about how much one's house is worth this month and whos dog is pooing where are excruciating. I'll take the village life and it's associated learning curve anyday.

[garro]

Wouldn't it be great if they had that reality show 'Neighbours From hel_l' set here in Thailand? I would definitely watch it.

It's all relative isn't it? Until my home is constructed in the village, I will reside in a moo ban which is about 60% - 70% farang. Neighborly chats about how much one's house is worth this month and whos dog is pooing where are excruciating. I'll take the village life and it's associated learning curve anyday.

60% - 70% farang- Wow

It must be a bit like the compounds they have in Saudi Arabia for foreigners - very self contained.

The nearest farang to me is 7km away and like me he keeps to himself.

I agree with you, the rural village life is well worth it despite the occasional ups and downs.

[jayjayjayjay]

Well I had better bring you all up to speed ,I was summoned to the Police station at5.30 pm and just left.

The guy I biffed turned up and demanded 10k compensation +500 bt to cover the 5 stitches he had over his eye, I had already given my version of events when he eventually arrived ,still pissed as a newt.

The policeman sent us outside while he interviewed the guy and after an hour called us back and said the guy would settle for 3k.

I asked the policeman ,what law allows a drunk to come on our property ,pick a blue and want payment when he comes up second best. Mr.P says you should have rung us, I said ,if he hadnt gone for the machete I wouldnt have decked him,Mr P says again you should have rung us,so I gave the argument away at that point

Any way the wife says ok we will pay you but we want damages of 5k for the mess your cows did to the pond walls at which point he says I want to ring my daughter in Bangkok.

Mr P rings her and gives her the gist of things and she tells him 1500bt and call it quits,the wife says ok (she was hungry and wanted out of there.

Now comes the scary bit, Mr.P tells the guy and his mate to go and us to stay, The conversation Mr.P had with the wife was related to me on the way back to the village,

I knew the daughter was a longtime bar girl,but Mr P said she is one nasty bit of work, it seems that she has an englishman "benefactor" with lots of money and no brains,she also has a thai husband (father of her two kids)

she also has a young Burmese boy friend who has a Glock Auto evidentally he was her pimp in Bangkok,

I had heard the story that he shot up a blokes car who cut him off in the main street here and that she paid 30k teamoney to get him off,but the big surprise was that Mr P admitted that his keeping the handgun was part of the payout.

To wrap it up we are advised to keep our eyes open and doors locked as Mr P wouldnt put it past this women to pay a smallish amount for me to have an accident,Oh he did give us his and his sergeants mobile numbers just in case.

So we will see how it plays out.

Why don't you eat humble pie and set up a small automaticly fed water trough for him. I can send you some basic designs we use on Ozzy farms. The reason... although everyones angry now, it will open up the lines of communication, help solve his problem and help you sleep at night. At 70yes, you dont want the "burmese guy, the sugar daddy etc" on you case.

[ozzydom]

Well I had better bring you all up to speed ,I was summoned to the Police station at5.30 pm and just left.

The guy I biffed turned up and demanded 10k compensation +500 bt to cover the 5 stitches he had over his eye, I had already given my version of events when he eventually arrived ,still pissed as a newt.

The policeman sent us outside while he interviewed the guy and after an hour called us back and said the guy would settle for 3k.

I asked the policeman ,what law allows a drunk to come on our property ,pick a blue and want payment when he comes up second best. Mr.P says you should have rung us, I said ,if he hadnt gone for the machete I wouldnt have decked him,Mr P says again you should have rung us,so I gave the argument away at that point

Any way the wife says ok we will pay you but we want damages of 5k for the mess your cows did to the pond walls at which point he says I want to ring my daughter in Bangkok.

Mr P rings her and gives her the gist of things and she tells him 1500bt and call it quits,the wife says ok (she was hungry and wanted out of there.

Now comes the scary bit, Mr.P tells the guy and his mate to go and us to stay, The conversation Mr.P had with the wife was related to me on the way back to the village,

I knew the daughter was a longtime bar girl,but Mr P said she is one nasty bit of work, it seems that she has an englishman "benefactor" with lots of money and no brains,she also has a thai husband (father of her two kids)

she also has a young Burmese boy friend who has a Glock Auto evidentally he was her pimp in Bangkok,

I had heard the story that he shot up a blokes car who cut him off in the main street here and that she paid 30k teamoney to get him off,but the big surprise was that Mr P admitted that his keeping the handgun was part of the payout.

To wrap it up we are advised to keep our eyes open and doors locked as Mr P wouldnt put it past this women to pay a smallish amount for me to have an accident,Oh he did give us his and his sergeants mobile numbers just in case.

So we will see how it plays out.

Why don't you eat humble pie and set up a small automaticly fed water trough for him. I can send you some basic designs we use on Ozzy farms. The reason... although everyones angry now, it will open up the lines of communication, help solve his problem and help you sleep at night. At 70yes, you dont want the "burmese guy, the sugar daddy etc" on you case.

Its not the water they want ,its nice green Rucci grass I have sown and hand water every day,its multi purpose is to consolodate the levee banks ,chop for fish feed and also its visual merits , we have landscaped extensively and after the wet intend building cabanas so that folk can sit eat and drink in nice surroundings.

To work 10 hr days only to have non caring twits allow there animals to trample all that work gets up my nose.

I care deeply for my wife and this project is to give her a sustainable income long after I am gone.

Your sound like you know cattle so you would know they should have access to water at all times,Picture the know it all thai who tethers his walking bank book in the middle of a dry rice paddy for 12 hrs a day with no water.