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Posted

Good evening all. I am a retired British army major, I live in Bangkok and describe myself as a connoisseur of what Trink used to call the demimonde. Simply put, I'm a bit of a raver and by Jove I know my stuff.

I enjoy many nocturnal pleasures, not least of which are those fine, strapping young creatures we call ladyboys. Why? Well let me tell you. First, there are the physical aspects. You know what I mean. Don't you just adore the sight of those amazonian beauties strutting around our favourite plaza in their tight little panties? By jove, I nearly cream myself whenever one of them comes near me.

Additionally, don't you find it frankly rather tedious going home night after night with a runty little Ning, a flat-chested Ping, a spotty-arsed Ying, a vacuous Lek, a plain-looking Yui or a halitosis-ridden Pui. Surely you see how much more civilized it is to take back to your quarters a long-legged Nathalie, a curvaceous Karen, a busty Samantha or a sultry-looking Sandy.

Lastly, let's not forget undergarments. Let's be frank, how many times have you taken home a so-called real girl only to cringe and weep at the sight of your little beauty wearing her grandmother's bra and a pair of panties dating back to the Battle of Britain? Not so with ladyboys, not so at all. I'm talking here about real finery: I'm talking about lace, I'm talking about lycra, good heavens man - I'm talking about some of the sexiest little drawers you'll find in the whole of the Kingdom.

Of course, I could add more, but on a family website like this I consider it inappropriate. Perhaps the best way for me to end is to extend an open invitation to all of you to join me soon in my favourite bar in that colosseum of pleasure we all know and love so well.

Good night, and God save the Queen.

Posted
What is halitosis?

Pobly means that their breath smells like cum.

But being a major, I don't understand it ,I don't know much about the Brit services but I thought that he would be an Admiral or sea going rank,self proclaimed fudge packer and all. Coarse maybe they found out he was a fag and drummed his ass out and he really a CPL.

Posted

Regie old chap, liked your post, couldn't agree more, a night with a runty little Ning could be tedious in the extreme.

I'm assuming your intimate with that nice lad Johnny Moron and his close mate Wayne :D

Not forgetting Professor Sebastian Mortimer, Comrade Vladamir Zharkhovsky, Python Lee Jackson and California Dave. :o

Posted
Perhaps the best way for me to end is to extend an open invitation to all of you to join me soon in my favourite bar in that colosseum of pleasure we all know and love so well.

RSVP: Sorry but I won't be making it. I play for the other team and have a lifetime contract.

Posted
Good night, and God save the Queen.

Imagine if the queen turned out to be a ladyboy :o:D:D

That'd be AOK. Ole Phil was in the Navy ... he knows just how to handle a ladyboy or ten. :D

Posted
Perhaps the best way for me to end is to extend an open invitation to all of you to join me soon in my favourite bar in that colosseum of pleasure we all know and love so well.

Heads-up, Thaiquila! :o

Posted

Perhaps the best way for me to end is to extend an open invitation to all of you to join me soon in my favourite bar in that colosseum of pleasure we all know and love so well.

Heads-up, Thaiquila! :o

Your refined argumentation in debates requires some getting used to. :D

Posted
major, SIR ... could you please give a proper, understandable, NON-british TRANSLATION of your statement??? :o

Translated into American:

"Ladyboys are awesome, dude!"

Posted
major, SIR ... could you please give a proper, understandable, NON-british TRANSLATION of your statement??? :o

Translated into American:

"Ladyboys are awesome, dude!"

Ohhhhh that's what it means

Posted

I've a friend who's a ladyboy who drives a Merc and is a businesswoman and who is giving me 1,000 to translate this company VCD to paper later today.

If they were all like her then they would not be a joke.

P.S. No it's not me (The Major).

Posted

funny post Major :o

You sound like a good christian, please turn to Mathew 2.7 and I quote "And god looked down upon to Adam" and said "remember Adam, it is Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve" and "if you meet Pooh Pirate Pete from Cuddly Creek, tell him he is a halitosis-ridden serpent"

let us pray!

Posted
I'm assuming your intimate with that nice lad Johnny Moron and his close mate Wayne :D

Not forgetting Professor Sebastian Mortimer, Comrade Vladamir Zharkhovsky, Python Lee Jackson and California Dave. :o

What in Heaven's name are you talking about you impertinent little turd? I know none of these people you mention and can assure you that they never served in any of my regiments. By jove, if I were your commanding officer right now I'd give you a bloody good thrashing.

Let me remind you, I am here to talk about ladyboys and to discuss with real men the pleasures that such fine young creatures can offer. Good Heavens above dear sir, I do not come to this site to communicate with limp-wristed fairies who get off at the sight of silly young fillies wearing replicas of Queen Mary's corset.

Enough said. At precisely six o'clock tonight, I shall be eating in the mess area outside of the plaza and welcome all of you to join me in my inspection of the ladyboys as they parade their way into the colosseum for their evening's work.

And by Heavens we'll have fun. A few good stiff drinks, a little bit of well-disguised voyeurism, a little bit of............No, I'm sorry, I can't possibly say that on a family website.

Please, allow me to end before I cream myself. Good afternoon, and God save the Queen.

Posted
I'm assuming your intimate with that nice lad Johnny Moron and his close mate Wayne :D

Not forgetting Professor Sebastian Mortimer, Comrade Vladamir Zharkhovsky, Python Lee Jackson and California Dave. :o

What in Heaven's name are you talking about you impertinent little turd? I know none of these people you mention and can assure you that they never served in any of my regiments. By jove, if I were your commanding officer right now I'd give you a bloody good thrashing.

Let me remind you, I am here to talk about ladyboys and to discuss with real men the pleasures that such fine young creatures can offer. Good Heavens above dear sir, I do not come to this site to communicate with limp-wristed fairies who get off at the sight of silly young fillies wearing replicas of Queen Mary's corset.

Enough said. At precisely six o'clock tonight, I shall be eating in the mess area outside of the plaza and welcome all of you to join me in my inspection of the ladyboys as they parade their way into the colosseum for their evening's work.

And by Heavens we'll have fun. A few good stiff drinks, a little bit of well-disguised voyeurism, a little bit of............No, I'm sorry, I can't possibly say that on a family website.

Please, allow me to end before I cream myself. Good afternoon, and God save the Queen.

I am sorry to have impugned your reputation Major.

Sadly I am otherwise engaged this evening, but I trust you have a most enjoyable time.

Respectfully yours etc.

Stocky :D

Posted

I think the major is more interested in fancy underwear and doesn't approve of what the gals hide in there, since it lacks the attributes he appreciates in upright soldiers.

Posted

Good afternoon all.

Firstly, I must confess to feeling a little peeved that none of you responded to my invitation to accompany me at the plaza on Friday night. Nevermind. I daresay many of you had prior engagements or simply chose instead to go looking for ladyboys elsewhere.

Anyway, dressed as usual in my finest tweed hunting jacket and sporting a rather stylish pair of riding boots, I entered my favourite bar at around seven and was greeted with customary charm by Rebecca.

Charlene was my companion for much of the evening and I must say she looked totally ravishing in her pink bra and matching drawers. Sadly, Natasha was once again unavailable for inspection, but Jennifer more than made up for this by dancing provocatively in that saucy little minskirt I bought her last Tuesday.

Overall, my evening was thoroughly enjoyable, and the only slight annoyance came at the sight of an elderly gentleman enjoying some hands-on pleasure with Samantha in the lavatories. To be perfectly frank, I tend to frown somewhat on such activity and am generally of the opinion that displays of affection are best reserved for one's personal living quarters.

Anyhow, enough said. I really must dash off now as I have a shopping engagement with Mandy at five and if I can summon the courage I may yet take Cindy up on her offer of pre-dinner drinks at the Sheraton.

Regards to you all; good afternoon, and God save the Queen.

Posted
Good afternoon all.

Firstly, I must confess to feeling a little peeved that none of you responded to my invitation to accompany me at the plaza on Friday night. Nevermind. I daresay many of you had prior engagements or simply chose instead to go looking for ladyboys elsewhere.

Anyway, dressed as usual in my finest tweed hunting jacket and sporting a rather stylish pair of riding boots, I entered my favourite bar at around seven and was greeted with customary charm by Rebecca.

Charlene was my companion for much of the evening and I must say she looked totally ravishing in her pink bra and matching drawers. Sadly, Natasha was once again unavailable for inspection, but Jennifer more than made up for this by dancing provocatively in that saucy little minskirt I bought her last Tuesday.

Overall, my evening was thoroughly enjoyable, and the only slight annoyance came at the sight of an elderly gentleman enjoying some hands-on pleasure with Samantha in the lavatories. To be perfectly frank, I tend to frown somewhat on such activity and am generally of the opinion that displays of affection are best reserved for one's personal living quarters.

Anyhow, enough said. I really must dash off now as I have a shopping engagement with Mandy at five and if I can summon the courage I may yet take Cindy up on her offer of pre-dinner drinks at the Sheraton.

Regards to you all; good afternoon, and God save the Queen.

Mightn't it be God save the Queens Major ?

Posted

Please accept my sincere apologies, major, I did turn up at the agreed location, alas not being accustomed to military punctuality, I was late. By your report of the evenings proceedings, it appears we crossed paths unwittingly nonetheless, do we not share a similar preference for the delicious strumpet Samantha, who was treating me to a minor fit of ecstasy with her latexgloved paws while I was precariously balancing myself on my 5"stilettos which I was test-wearing for the very first time to humbly attract your approving attention, and pretended to attend to the business cadets are expected to in the lavatory. I shall not elaborate further on the proceedings of the evening on my part, but leave this for another occasion when I hope to be honoured by making your acquaintance in more suitable surroundings than this abyssmal forum which is no doubt inhabited by many a unappreciative civilians.

Posted
Let's start an "Appreciation of appreciation posts" topic.

Appreciated. :o

Cheers,

Chanchao

No--lets just end this one.

Yet another award winner.

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