You Know You Are In Thailand When....

[NewLifeNY]

You know you are in Thailand ....when people cut you off at the local 7-11 or any type payment line and you tell them and they have no clue what you are talking about....grrrrrrr

When you see a 10 million baht car stop next to you at a stop light and the guy is picking his nose and looking at his own bu...

[Lost in LOS]

You know you are in Thailand when some paodophile posts a post that he dates a School Girl and 5 of her school girl mates come home at lunch time and get into bed for 1 1/2 hours.

You know you are in Thailand when the Thai Visa forum moderator completely ignores that part of the post and removes some other words of a sexual nature!!

<deleted> !!???

just for fun i checked your last posts and its all about sex. are you sexually frustrated or just a religious nut.

when i see his post I automatically assumed his girlfriend was over 18, when you read it you must have had bad thoughts in your mind

so far the majority of the posts have been positive although funny. we are not necessarily complaining about these things, they are like telling a joke that you are living in, and that makes Thailand fun and interesting

Edited February 23, 2009 by Lost in LOS

[najman]

"

t'was a joke The way you wrote it just made my fingers do it. 21 eh still a bit young for a 29 year old, especially seeing as Thai girls are generally very immature anyway....do you read comics together? 26/27 is my limit for a relationship and i am 30, otherwise they just have not had the life experience for an adult relationship, although i am sure those high heels and friends of hers are enough to keep you going. Bet you look a bit silly dancing with her school friends at the local disco You probably look about 35 to them considering Thai guys keep their youth well. xx

"

Not funny. Each to their own. I found most girls closer to my age were looking for guys 35+. My gf seems a lot smarter than the average thai girl and is doing better than all her peers. I used to think an older girl would be better but don't feel that way anymore and my gf doesn't seem to mind in the least. I get mistaken for a 23 year old constantly which is to my advantage in many ways. I always seem to shock people when i say my actual age so it doesnt look odd when i'm which her. Lucky me. I didn't notice thai guys looking much yonger than me. I think a lot of the 25 years olds look the same or even older than me.

Either way I dont judge a relationship by age. I've been whih girls 4 years older than me simply because I had a great conection with them. So it's up to you in the end.

Yes the girls are uni students and they all seem to dress in the same uniform. I have a thai friend who is 27 studying a uni course and she still has to wear the thai national uniform. They all look like "school girls" to me. Of course you have to be 20 to go to a night club and maybe get away with having a fake or friends ID when you're 18. I wouldn't be in a relationship that looked or felt odd. But I'm not interested in feeling compelled to defend my relationship, so we'll leave it at that

[clausewitz]

The Cambodian beggar kids following you go no farther....

was that funny?

yep not bad.

[najman]

When dashing down a street in Bangkok on a motorbike evaporating vinegar from a sidewalk cooking cart catches your breath and stings your eyes.

When it's 6AM and it's so hot that reading email is causing you to sweat.

When you're eating somtom.

When you ask for ice in your beer.

When you're in a taxi and the drive is listening to luuk-tung and clearly doesn't know where he's going.

When you're offered an insect to eat and you eat it with a smile (and chug of beer).

When you wait 5 minutes at a traffic light and figure it must be normal.

When you're riding on a taxi motorbike, flying through traffic – without a helmet.

When the sight of university student in her regular uniform cause your heart to skip a beat.

When you have an awesome massage for a few dollars.

When you fart and people laugh.

When you're at your wife's family's house and grandmother has come out of the shower topless.

When you come out of the shower with only a towel and don't feel in a hurry to change.

When you wake up in the morning to the bird screeching in the trees around you.

When bottle service is the norm not a luxury.

When at a restaurant the waiter/waitress just waits for you to look at the menu and order – no matter how long it takes.

When the food is so good you can't believe it.

When the sidewalk restaurants have the food so good.

When you can get fresh fruit anywhere for 10 baht.

When sometimes a ladyboy looks good.

When music you'd never listen to at home sounds just perfect.

When you go to a lake or river and feed the mass of fish.

When you make the down payment on your house with an envelope of cash that would make a drug dealer embarrassed.

When you see people picking lice out of each other's hair.

When you see your girl plucking hair out of her armpit.

When you squat to do your business.

When there's no toilet paper it's OK, you know what to do.

When there's not a bum squinter you're upset.

When you're on BTS in the rush hour, packed in shoulder to shoulder, and no one smells bad.

When there's a topless ladyboy at your wedding.

When you look at a chart in the morning to see the right colors to wear.

When you stand up before a movie.

When you spend 13 hours in the back of a pick-up and you're still not at your destination.

When you eat with a spoon.

When you eat out of the same plate with 10 people, with that same spoon.

When your neighbor comes over in their pajamas.

When your neighbors, or strangers, ask how much you paid for your house, how old you are, how much you make…

When you wake up in the morning and feel full of thanks for this wonderful life.

When kindness kisses your brow and smiles touch your heart.

When the sun sets on verdant green rice fields, mountains in the distance, children dance on the dusty red road and the music murmur of the village is in the distance.

When your wife is 30 years younger than you and is the anchor, the rock and the touchstone in your life.

When you find yourself kneeling before a golden Buddha in a temple somewhere in the middle of nowhere, for a reason you don't understand, in a place far from home, tears running down your cheeks from the wonder of this life and a monk comes over and says in perfect English "Where you from?"

Good ones!

[najman]

I thought I'd add this post from a different angle as another forum member did:

You know when you are NOT in Thailnd when: All you can talk about is thailand.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when someone needs some dental work and you tell them to go to thailand and get it done at one of their dental hospitals for a fraction of the price they would normally pay.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when You think about what you will do next when you arrive back in thailand in a few months.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when someone acts like they need a holiday and you tell them they should go to thailand and relax.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when life seems so boring and pointless where you are now and doesnt matter how much you are earning you still dont feel better.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when when someone describes a holiday they went on to some country and then don't plan to go back (I think most people always want to return to thailand)

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when there is no local food shop selling food after 8-9pm

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when people around you have every material possion in the world they could possibly need but are still not happy and dont smile.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when people at a party in your house think they need weed to be happy.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when people around you work all day and complain yet have never left the country (they should go to thailand )

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when you talk too much about thailand a realize you should stop refering to it since they have no idea what you are talking about and have never been there.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when you look at all the "sexy" local girls and "hot" western chicks on TV can't even make you rise in my pants (I prefer chocolate over vanilla now )

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when you live in a crappy 80 year old house in a big city with crappy everthing yet you are paying 4 times the price for something 1/4 as good as you pay in thailand.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when you have to go to a video rental store to watch the latest (3 month old movies) for the price it costs you to buy it in thailand.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when you watch the American TV show "Beauty and the Geeks" and wonder how you ever felt attracted to Western bimbos.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when You pay 4 times as much to get lousy alcohol and have no one around you wanting to drink Whiskey soda and coke mixed drinks. Instead they want super boring wine or average beer that warms in 1 minute.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when second hand cars are cheaper than scooters and you end up not buying a scooter.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when you look around you and see all these people striving for things that will only make them smile for 30 seconds.

You know when you are NOT in Thailand when you can't stop thinking about thailand...

...There are so many more but i'm affriad your forum would run out of website storage space...

[Underbelly]

when you start picking your nose and not care anymore

[NewLifeNY]

When "fashion sense" has gone out the window....

When u can eat ice cream on a hotdog bun....delicious.

When you go and order your food from a street vendor and you see thousands of flies on your meat and you stilll order your food....

[loong]

When 20 Baht flip flops last for 6 months, but 500 Baht shoes last 5 minutes!

[NewLifeNY]

YO know you are in Thailand when you get SUGAR with your soup and SALT with your fruit shake!

[mdechgan]

When having a meal on the sidewalk and a 12 foot tall elephant walks by and the people around you act like its normal.

[Birdman]

When having a meal on the sidewalk and a 12 foot tall elephant walks by and the people around you act like its normal.

If you thing that's unusual, try India

[loong]

YO know you are in Thailand when you get SUGAR with your soup and SALT with your fruit shake! huh.gif rolleyes.gif

I'd forgotten about that one - same when you buy the savoury pastries and pizza in Big C etc and they are loaded with sugar..............Puke - yes you know you are in Thailand

[loong]

You know you are in Thailand when......

the smallest raincloud obscures the blistering hot sun and the locals complain about the cold...........

Yet they get into a car or room and turn the air con to it's coldest setting!!!!

[eek]

YO know you are in Thailand when you get SUGAR with your soup and SALT with your fruit shake! huh.gif rolleyes.gif

..and your buttered toast comes loaded with sugar on top too.

[EvilDrSomkid]

..and your buttered toast comes loaded with sugar on top too.

Yummy!

[Birdman]

Replying to You Know You Are In Thailand When....

...reflexes the insufficiency to understand, let alone, living the Thai Ways.

[samgrowth]

You Know You Are In Thailand When the girl you pick up last night turn into a man in the morning.

You Know You Are In Thailand When you land in U-ta-pao when your ticket say Swampy.

[Birdman]

You Know You Are In Thailand When the girl you pick up last night turn into a man in the morning.

You Know You Are In Thailand When you land in U-ta-pao when your ticket say Swampy.

...really - that happen to you???

[Tinkelbell]

QUOTE (samgrowth @ 2009-02-24 21:59:43) You Know You Are In Thailand When the girl you pick up last night turn into a man in the morning.

........................................................

I thought I was reading from the 'Joke Section'.

Thanks anyway for a good laugh. Also it could be true, TIT.

[BillyBobThai]

Having 3 cats, changing the litter is done daily. The wife hates paying for cat litter so we go to the beach. This morning when going to collect sand, I see a 125cc motorcycle pulling 2 jet skis and a 6 meter boat. One minute latter I see another doing the same. Only in Thailand.

[NewLifeNY]

You know you are in Thiland when you get in a bike accident and it only cost 2,700b to fix....

You know you are in Thailand when you see some one get into a bike accident and local people run around with buckets and nets trying to catch the "spirit" of the guy who just fell off, but now he is dusting him self off and trying to get back on his bike and people are yelling " wait! wait! we almost cought your spirit!"

[wolfmanjack]

You know you are in Thailand when your gf comes home at lunch time with 5 school friends and they all promptly jump into your king sized bed and go to sleep for 1 1/2 hours until their next class starts

" What we have here is failure to communicate" substitute 'Uni' for 'school' and all ambiguity is eliminated

Even if his gf was 18 and still in "school" it would not make him a pedophile. That term should be reserved for prepubescents.

[midasthailand]

You know you are in Thailand when your Gik spends most of her time with you answering SMS messages from her boyfriend.

YKYIT when you eat Moo Ping and sticky rice for breakfast.

YKYIT when you order a bottle of beer and it automatically comes with a bucket of ice.

YKYIT when the person you arranged to meet at 12 noon turns up at 2pm as if there was nothing wrong with being late, and you accept it as the norm rather than the exception.

[HorseDoctor]

....YOU can't find full sized spoons, without having to buy a companion fork- therefore I have 20 forks but the spoons soon disappear.

....When you go ionto a cavernous supermarket and there is an entire aisle of 50 varieties of instant coffee, but real coffee? Nada .

....and you can't find tomato paste without those horrid little fish inside , again 50 varieties but no plain tomato paste.

Ditto, tampons. Why would any woman actually prefer to wear a stinky, nasty bloody pad between her legs?

Is this part of the sex toy ban?

....The hair on your legs is an inch long, why bother shaving , not like anyone is ever going to look at you again. Hard to measure the armpit hair.

(Actually this has been liberating as back in the west I used to really put a lot of time effort into my appearance and really thought is was important o be considered sexually appealing. After about 2 years here...Noooo more..)

....Where your cockfighting neighbors claim they are humane when they attach artificial spurs to the cock's feet, " So they die faster.."

[dotcom]

They do sell tampons at the grocery store but I guess the local women don't like them. My girlfriends all do. (like them). Need instruction.

[polecat]

....When you go ionto a cavernous supermarket and there is an entire aisle of 50 varieties of instant coffee, but real coffee? Nada .

....Where your cockfighting neighbors claim they are humane when they attach artificial spurs to the cock's feet, " So they die faster.."

I'll take you up on a couple of these things, Horsedoctor. Not that I'm saying you're wrong, just that I've had different experiences.

I think I remember that you live in Phuket (right?), but in all the years I've lived in CM and BKK I've never struggled to find real coffee. Tesco's, Carrefour, Tops, Rimping, Villa... all have it.

I've actually spent a lot of time at cockfights in the North (writing articles, not betting or anything) and never seen spurs on cocks' feet. I'm sure it does happen, but it's much more common in the Philipines than here.

[dotcom]

Go to buy you silverware (eating utensils) at Emporium. They have a vast array of items ala carte ; in matching patterns. 5 th floor near Power Mall.

[jandtaa]

$30.00 to get a tooth pulled ? You got ripped off , definately a Farang in Thailand , most I paid was 250BAHT in Rangsit and never felt a thing , the dentist was Chinese .

was the appointment at "two-thirty" by any chance ?? 

[polecat]

$30.00 to get a tooth pulled ? You got ripped off , definately a Farang in Thailand , most I paid was 250BAHT in Rangsit and never felt a thing , the dentist was Chinese .

was the appointment at "two-thirty" by any chance ?? 

Thank you.