Local Dispute Over Parking.

[centrico]

Well then. After living in the same house amongst Thai people for 2 years a new neighbour moved in about 4 weeks ago and 3 houses down from me. Yet he insisted on regularly parking his car so I could not drive into or out of my house.

Normally you bip the horn and people, myself included, move the obstructing vehicle. Not this man. He moved his car when it was convenient for him. He understands some English and I tried talking to him to no avail. I then blocked his car several times from behind after arriving home and unable to gain access to my drive in the hope he would take the hint. He didn't.

Wednesday his car was blocking my exit so I could neither get the car nor the motorcycle out. Now, after 4 weeks of this I was not a happy man. As it turned out he was getting into his car as I was outside. I shouted over to him but he ignored me completely and was getting ready to drive away. I ran over to his car and slammed the flat of my hand down on his roof to get his attention. That worked It also made a nice dent in the roof of his Honda. Obviously he was not a happy man. We almost came to blows but I think the look of anger on my face and my towering over him made him back off. Words were exchanged and he said he was going to call the police.

Today the police arrived.

Two policemen, the neighbour and his woman. Naturally a crowd gathered outside to view from a distance. How they do crawl out of the woodwork

My wife went outside to talk to them but before anything was said I insisted the neighbour get off my property. No way on this earth was I going to allow talks to proceed with him on my property. He moved into the street Wife was not happy at my attitude but I had had enough of this man.

Negotiations went on with me in the background drinking a coffee and keeping quiet as ordered. When the wife came back to me she told me I could pay or go to the police station. Well, I was in a belligerent mood. I spoke loudly enough for this neighbour to hear that he had no witnesses to the incident and that I was happy to go to court if needs be and fight it out. Quietly I let the wife know I would be happy to pay a reasonable sum for the dent in the Honda's roof. I also laid down one condition. The condition of any payment was that the police be aware he was the initial instigator of the trouble and that we wanted the neighbour to stop parking outside my house.

I realise I put the wife in an awkward position but I was not a happy man.

The result?

The police did a good job. They were very fair over it all. No visit to the police station for me. They have made sure this neighbour will no longer park and block my entrance / exit. It has cost me 2,000 Baht to have his car repaired and the receipt will state that the neighbour no longer causes inconvenience to me by parking outside 100% so as the wife says. In the end the 2,000 Baht is a cheap price to pay.

Yes, it could have been worse but the police seemed very helpful and not unfriendly at all.

A big thanks have to go to the wife. She handled everything very well.

Some may say I pushed my luck with my attitude but I feel I had to draw the line somewhere. Either be a man or be a mouse. Being a mouse is OK but even a mouse can turn !!

As an aside. It is not easy living amongst Thai people a lot of the time. There is a sense of continuous resentment under the surface. Questions are always asked if the wife met me in Pattaya. Was she working there? Why does she not work? Why do I not work? [The neighbours all go out to work and we feel they are not happy my wife does not have to]. I will say that she lived and worked here in the same town or in BKK, never worked in a bar or in Pattaya or similar.

[wintermute]

Yes I think a lesson was learned here but unfortunately for you it wasn't the one where the Thai guy parking his car looks at fault.

[tigerfish]

here we go.

thai apologists to the fore.

what would you have done? politely and accept it i suppose!

[wintermute]

here we go.

thai apologists to the fore.

what would you have done? politely and accept it i suppose!

Not slamming his meaty fist into his car roof for starters and not causing a moo-ban scene.

[tigerfish]

here we go.

thai apologists to the fore.

what would you have done? politely and accept it i suppose!

Not slamming his meaty fist into his car roof for starters and not causing a moo-ban scene.

answer the question. what would you have done?

[daoyai]

This situation has come up a few times on this forum, blocked driveways. Anyone know if there is a "law" about this? Has never happened to me yet, I know one thing I would not escalate the situation but don't know what I would do.

[hawthorne]

It is always helpfull to be better friends with the police than the neighbor. Many ways to do this and use your wife as a bridge. When an issue can not be resolved by confronting the individual in a polite and business like manner then call your friends at the police station over for a visit. Explan your situation but do not request action. The next visit request action. But call when the parking is at its worse.

you still may not win but losing your temper is not the solution. It only shows your attempt at Intimidation because you are taller, fatter or just have more skin. You have lost respect. The neighbors might view you as the screaming Farrang maniac now.

[wintermute]

here we go.

thai apologists to the fore.

what would you have done? politely and accept it i suppose!

Not slamming his meaty fist into his car roof for starters and not causing a moo-ban scene.

answer the question. what would you have done?

There are too many unknown variables for me to answer that hypothetical question, sir.

[tigerfish]

to the op.

it will be interesting to see if the neighbour now pushes the issue again and continues to park over your driveway. knowing that you have already caused damage to his car. will he now use this as a excuse to further more belittle you in front of the rest of the residents in your soi. trying to make the farang look like the party in the wrong, if you call the police out again.

[wintermute]

trying to make the farang look like the party in the wrong, if you call the police out again.

Since he committed property damage the farang was in fact the party in the wrong and the fact that the thai guy received compensation for it only weakens the OP's next approach if the same thing happens.

Plus the neighbors saw it all only making him lose major face by acting like a poop stick in front of dozens of people.

[GM1955]

here we go.

thai apologists to the fore.

what would you have done? politely and accept it i suppose!

Not slamming his meaty fist into his car roof for starters and not causing a moo-ban scene.

answer the question. what would you have done?

Better still what would you have done ?

[metisdead]

If I was in this situation, I would be taking pictures and taking notes and then present to police when needed.

[Flatouthruthefog]

here we go.

thai apologists to the fore.

what would you have done? politely and accept it i suppose!

Hi OP and others.

Your patience lasted a month, if I read you right. You had to DO something. I would have 'lost it' maybe a little earlier than you in these circumstances. What if your wife or child had been ill and you suddenly had to dash to the hospital? Or your house was on fire?

The only difference is - I would not have damaged his car (thus saved 2000b which, by the way, I think is a VERY low cost for all this, financially). I would have done something I learned from UK in the late 60's ('road rage' is not new!). You grab the keys out of his ignition and throw them under his car.

a) he can't go anywhere

you have not stolen them

c) he has to grovel for them (unless you lose any ensuing fight, then you have to do so while he kicks your ass. That's a calculated risk).

So far so good in your case.

Unlike some posters here, I think he lost face big time in front of the neighbours, more than you. BUT (almost inevitably) you did put your wife in an unenviable position.

So, after 15 full time years here, I have to say that I fear this will not be the end of the matter. In fact, if you rent, you might consider moving. I think that you - and especially your wife - had better be on full alert for retribution for a very long time.

Good luck and happy motoring!

[wintermute]

If I was in this situation, I would be taking pictures and taking notes and then present to police when needed.

He should ready to break out the whiteboard with pointer stick to be ready to explain the situation to them in colorful cartoon-like diagrams too.

[tigerfish]

here we go.

thai apologists to the fore.

what would you have done? politely and accept it i suppose!

Not slamming his meaty fist into his car roof for starters and not causing a moo-ban scene.

answer the question. what would you have done?

Better still what would you have done ?

i would have done the same thing as (metisdead) taken pictures and made notes, plus put cones or the garbage bin in the space. then tell the guy if he persists in blocking my driveway, that a call to the local bib would be in order.

Edited May 28, 2010 by tigerfish

[Nowhereman60]

Get a knife and key the car a few times when he blocks you and no one is around. Works all the time.

[centrico]

This situation has come up a few times on this forum, blocked driveways. Anyone know if there is a "law" about this? Has never happened to me yet, I know one thing I would not escalate the situation but don't know what I would do.

On that score, the Police have said that the road outside is a government road [public road to you and I] and that people can park where they want. The fact that I and others are inconvenienced by this is tough luck apparently. In the end it boild down to good neighbourliness. In my street 99% of people park with care or as I said in the original post they and I will move an obstructing vehicle when a horn is sounded. You cannot always help but cause an obstruction.

It was not my intention to escalate the situation. A flash of anger and being very p*ssed off at the amount of times this neighbour blocked me in or out of the drive and the fact he totally ignored requests to move the car and he speaks very good English. I now understand he was in University in Australia. But I stand by what I said that I am happy at the outcome though this situation has revealed some very interesting information for me with regards to the neighbours. That will have to be another topic.

[centrico]

trying to make the farang look like the party in the wrong, if you call the police out again.

Since he committed property damage the farang was in fact the party in the wrong and the fact that the thai guy received compensation for it only weakens the OP's next approach if the same thing happens.

Plus the neighbors saw it all only making him lose major face by acting like a poop stick in front of dozens of people.

The neighbours did witness the police coming but not the actual incident as the soi was empty at the time. Yes, I am the one who looks bad but as I said in another reply there is more to this and I'll make another topic on that. No I should not have lost my temper but at the end of the day we can take so much sh*t before taking action.

The wife has spoken to the family opposite me who have two houses side by side for two wives, husbands and 3 children. They have also been extremely inconvenienced by this man blocking their exit too. The soi itself is only just wide enough for two vehicles to pass or for one to park carefully and leave room for others to drive past.

[centrico]

here we go.

thai apologists to the fore.

what would you have done? politely and accept it i suppose!

Hi OP and others.

Your patience lasted a month, if I read you right. You had to DO something. I would have 'lost it' maybe a little earlier than you in these circumstances. What if your wife or child had been ill and you suddenly had to dash to the hospital? Or your house was on fire?

The only difference is - I would not have damaged his car (thus saved 2000b which, by the way, I think is a VERY low cost for all this, financially). I would have done something I learned from UK in the late 60's ('road rage' is not new!). You grab the keys out of his ignition and throw them under his car.

a) he can't go anywhere

you have not stolen them

c) he has to grovel for them (unless you lose any ensuing fight, then you have to do so while he kicks your ass. That's a calculated risk).

So far so good in your case.

Unlike some posters here, I think he lost face big time in front of the neighbours, more than you. BUT (almost inevitably) you did put your wife in an unenviable position.

So, after 15 full time years here, I have to say that I fear this will not be the end of the matter. In fact, if you rent, you might consider moving. I think that you - and especially your wife - had better be on full alert for retribution for a very long time.

Good luck and happy motoring!

I gather now that this goes a lot deeper than I understood it to be. Your observations are correct in the main too regards moving. I am happy I rent . Yes, it was unfortunate the wife was placed in a difficult position yet she too was not happy with the neighbour before this incident.

The police [not those who came to the house] have since spoken to my wife on her mobile. They wanted my passport and she refused to take it to the police station. They threatened more problems if she did not take it. As my passport is my governments property I will not hand it over. It took several phone calls to the right people to make that situation go away but with a warning attached. They have said they can help this time as they are old friends of hers but only this once because I am not Thai.

As it stands my name my passport number and my address are on the police computer. Warnings have been issued to me via the wife.

Move? The wife insists I now move and she is the boss

[Lumumba]

I used to live a opposite a family that had 3 cars, I had 2, I ll put one inside the car park and park one outside the gate, with trees as shade.

The family across worked government jobs, 2 years i lived there , I never talked to any of my neighbors, the puyai baan has been my friend for 10 years. All my visitors drive, but i always make sure they park on the in soi with no house entrances.

The man across me loves to park under my trees and have a ciggy before going in to his house. So when ever I came back and see his car in my spot , I just take his father's spot in front of a vacant house next to theirs.

I would have gone and asked him to come and move his car out of the way if he ever blocked my entrance. I would not leave till he moved it or shot me or called the BIB (I suspect he is a cop too but he never dresses up).

Last week, my wife posted a sign in Thai out front, I asked what it said, she said the next house put up a sign asking us not to put dog poop in the flowers pots(we dont own any dog or cat), so she wrote a sign that said you backing up the wrong the tree.I got out of the car and took both signs and put them in the bin.

I have a door bell, they can ring it if they have any issues, as I would do if I thing they playing dirty.

If they repeat that, I ll put a camera outside to record all of us.

[jackdawson]

note to self ; NEVER live

amongst Thai people

ps sell now and get out ; ur nightmare had only just begun

[Loz]

Buy a big mad dog or "adopt" a stray. have it shใt on his car when its obstructing your driveway.

Move house to a nice wide quiet soi where there is ample room for off street parking on the driveway.

Wait till the guy comes home drunk one night and explain things to him a la marquis de queensbury. You might see if he is interested in wearing a sack on his head for this one. If he obliges it will make reprecussion almost imposible.

buy him a bottle of "special" whiskey as an apology. Be sure to attend the funeral and look grief striken, pointing out how you had just burried the hatchet and were looking forward to a long friendship. (then buy his house for stang on the baht and rent it out minus the parking rights.)

[thaifkrlim]

I used to live a opposite a family that had 3 cars, I had 2, I ll put one inside the car park and park one outside the gate, with trees as shade.

The family across worked government jobs, 2 years i lived there , I never talked to any of my neighbors, the puyai baan has been my friend for 10 years. All my visitors drive, but i always make sure they park on the in soi with no house entrances.

The man across me loves to park under my trees and have a ciggy before going in to his house. So when ever I came back and see his car in my spot , I just take his father's spot in front of a vacant house next to theirs.

I would have gone and asked him to come and move his car out of the way if he ever blocked my entrance. I would not leave till he moved it or shot me or called the BIB (I suspect he is a cop too but he never dresses up).

Last week, my wife posted a sign in Thai out front, I asked what it said, she said the next house put up a sign asking us not to put dog poop in the flowers pots(we dont own any dog or cat), so she wrote a sign that said you backing up the wrong the tree.I got out of the car and took both signs and put them in the bin.

I have a door bell, they can ring it if they have any issues, as I would do if I thing they playing dirty.

If they repeat that, I ll put a camera outside to record all of us.

you go living in neighbourhoods of Penang or KL, you will not experience arguments on trivial matters such as this

i moved 4 years ago, it's still sunny days here

[kudroz]

It's unfortunate but I think it is best that you move out. You never know what goes on in their heads. Thais have a propensity for violence in these circumstances; when they have lost face or when they are facing a conflict they have no social intelligence to solve. I have often witnessed Thais turn irrational and violent because of small mundane things to us.

Of course they are not all like this, but depending of their social status and background it could be very much be the case with your neighbor - especially after hearing about him not caring about blocking your driveway on several occasions... This manifestation of an exaggerated idea of one's own importance is very typical of the "ban nok" (hillbillies) Thai. Avoid people like this as much as you can.

[Spoonman]

Your a ptient man Centrico, I would have politely asked for the car to be moved, if this did not happen I would ask twice more, if the vehicle was still not moved I would have grabbed the chain out of my shed and proceeded to skull drag the car clear of my driveway.

[Chunky1]

Why is it that everyone on Thai Visa but me has the phone number of the "right people" in their cell and always have an "influential friend" to bring along to the police station?

Edited May 28, 2010 by Chunky1

[singa-traz]

Why is it that everyone on Thai Visa but me has the "right people's" phone numbers in their cell phones and also always have an "influential friend" to bring along to the police station?

Because you are smart enough to never need one ...

[Chunky1]

Omg, so the end result is that you have to move? Jeez dude. You are going to rearrange your entire life for this guy?

Edited May 28, 2010 by Chunky1

[cpofc]

I recently had a similar problem. I have lived in this house for 5 years and been in and around this area for about 15 years. I have alot of friends here where i live and we drink and party together on a regular weekly basis. I am single and live alone (most of the time) and I am the only farang in the area. i was married to a Thai for 25 years. Separated now. But live close to the Ex Mother In Laws place, who was the one who organised this house for me that i am renting.

All of a sudden, last week, a nice new honda sedan started parking right outside and very close to my front gates. I don't own a car, no real need for one, and everyone knows it. so I don't have quite that problem you do. But drying my washing and merely getting out onto the street was a pain in the arse, not to mention my BBQ. She was parking so close I couldn't get my push bike out! The other day my thai mate drove over to see me and he couldn't park his car. By now I was getting pissed off and I had no idea whose car this was.

Whilst outside griping about it with my thai mate, my neigbours saw us and knew I was annoyed, my mate who had just recently moved from the Soi, was pissed off too. So one the neighbours went down and spoke to the woman who owned the car and on my behalf asked for her to move it. So she did.

The next evening there was a knock on my door and the woman honda owner and her daughter were standing there. We discussed the situation in a very polite manner and I conceded that it would be ok to park OCCASIONALLY but not to claim it as her own 24/7. She pointed out where she lived and said if she were ever parked there and I a needed her to move to just come and tell her. So plenty of krabs and kas later we parted friends and all is well.

Besides some of my other neighbours park in front of my place at times too. it is the usual give and take required when you live in a townhouse in a small Soi.

This Thai bloke you encountered is just one of a minority. They exist in all races. He was treating you with contempt and nobody should have to cop that, However, I would have approached it differently if I were you and not lost my temper. I would have tried the polite method first. You have now made an enemy and he will probably have lost face. Not the most desirable of situations.

In my Soi and area, there are working wives and stay at home wives noone cares one way or the other.

[Theyreallrubbish]

Had a similar situation with a new neighbour blocking my access and the other neighbours.

Finally, they left the car blocking my access. I called them and they said they were out of town but would come back in 20 minutes.

I waited 20 minutes, then called them again to hear they'd turned the phone off.

So I started looking at the car and noticed that one window was open a small crack. I used that to get it open a bit more and managed to reach in and open the lock. I then let off the handbrake and rolled the car out of the way.

All the other neighbors were laughing and helping me move the car.

I was out when they came back. Don't know what they thought about their car having been moved, but they haven't parked in anyone else's space since.