Pattaya'S Inspiration For James Bond

[PattayaOneTeam]

You Only Live Twice - by Mike Bell

What a paradoxical title Ian Fleming coined for his twelfth Bond book and how strange that in The Land of Lies, Truth should overwhelm Fiction! A Thai novelist is suing the Fleming estate for Intellectual Piracy. Somkinda Tealeaf is claiming that all the Bond plots appeared in Thai comics well before 'Casino Royale' was published in 1953. He claims, for example, that the Ambassador Hotel, that huge Russian ghetto north of Pattaya, was the original setting for 'Royal Casino' before gambling dens were outlawed in Thailand unless owned by the BiB.

To support his claim, Somkinda points to the fact that of the fourteen titles, one- seventh of them contain the word 'gold' or 'golden' - a sure sign of their Thai origin. Fleming is alleged to have subtly changed the titles to avoid detection. 'Muckraker' was the first Pattaya newspaper. 'Lotsa(Octo) Pussy' and 'Pussy Galore' both had their origins down in soi 6. 'Thunderballs' was the local name for an ailment contracted from overdoing things. 'The Guy who loved me,' was a very popular title amongst girls from Isaan. 'Live and Let Me Buy' and 'Diamonds Are Forever or at least until you go home' were less popular because of the overt glorification of shopping. Since Fleming wrote 'From Russia with Love' in 1957, there has been a huge surge of interest with many girls and bar owners taking lessons in that language. Menus have started to appear in Cyrillic script (though you can only buy cabbage.) As there is no Thai word for 'no', 'Dr No' was first entitled 'Dr Maybe' and finally became 'Dr OK-then-but-I-want-500-baht-more.' 'Chitty Shitty Bang Bang' needs no explanation and is definitely not a children's book - nor a Bond one either.

Fleming did not only tinker with the titles. He was not averse to making wholesale changes to the story line. 'For Your Eyes Only' was the poignant tale of a shy lady from Buriram who was asked to reveal all if she wanted a job in a certain Walking Street Go-Go bar. She convinced the farang owner to allow her to maintain her womanly secrets until after they were married. (Too late he discovered 'her' extra equipment.) 'On His Majesty's Secret Service' was the story of intrigue between senior police and army officers as they battled for control of Bangkok.

Many of Bond's supporting cast had their earlier Thai counterparts. Bond's boss, M, recently played by Dame Judy Dench started life as Mor Maah, Thai for horse, or dog, or come, depending on the tone. It is said she was based on the classical Thai actress Ting Tong Macadangdang who has recently appeared on BBC's 'Little Britain'.

In Pattaya there is every kind of villain and all Bond's enemies drew their inspiration from real life characters from Sin City. The popular (he appeared in no fewer than three Bond novels,) Ernst Stavro Blofeld started life as Blow Felt, the sinister mastermind behind Lolitas. Mr Big can be found displaying himself any night of the week in Boys Town. Spang, Drax and Krimmler have all gone respectable and run a team of lawyers specializing in selling houses to farangs. Auric Goldfinger owns a number of precious metal and jewelry shops on Pattaya Klang.

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-- Pattaya One 2011-02-12