What Do You Do To Perk Yourself Up?

[editnoir]

I relocated to Thailand almost six months ago and while I'm pleased with my work and my live-in love... I do find myself feeling quite lonely.

In accepting the position to have led me here, I have excelled in my career in ways most do not have the opportunity. While I am so overwhelmingly grateful in having achieved this, I am working alongside people much older than myself (I am in my early 20s). The youngest individual working under me is barely in their late 30s; although I can hold a conversation and enjoy the company of anyone from all ages, background, and so forth (thanks to my wonderful parents for educating me on/introducing me to the world!), I feel a significant social void. My boyfriend works a great deal, and though my job is demanding, at the end of the day, I'm the boss and do/can make time to enjoy time away from work. And ultimately, he's a man... I love him, so our friendship is outrageously fulfilling and I love our downtime together but I miss the ladies. There's something in a friendship with a woman, close in age, to discuss the ups and downs of gaining respect in the career ladder, arguing with your significant other, what trend of the season all the designers are shoving down our throats this season that just won't work for my frame or coloring, etc., that is really valuable. I don't want to sound like a brat -- I have a great quality of life, I travel, I visit local attractions, exercise, take myself for incredible meals, and, as rare as it is for most: I love my work; however, there is a whopping time difference with home, so even communication with family and friends is stalled. This is certainly sufficient but while I wait almost a day for responses and so forth in conversations, I desperately need to find ways to occupy myself from the homesickness and degree of isolation.

I have no intentions of dropping this life I've worked for and acquired... only to go back home where its "comfortable." That would have made all of my efforts to reach this point absolutely pointless and would just be silly of me. So, I ask: what do YOU do to cheer yourself up? I need ideas to spice things up!

Edited February 28, 2011 by editnoir

[sbk]

I hear you, I really really hear you on this one. You don't say where you live tho, so unless you are out in the middle of nowhere, it is possible to meet like minded women.

[redfish44]

I hear you too, big time.

Things I have been known to do more than once, just because I can and they are just for me:

good massage

treat myself to a night in with a hot bath and a good book when in the big city on my own

get my hair done at the good salon

wander aimlessly in bookstores

walks and let life drift over and around me in the park when in Bangkok or the beach at home

hang out with the soi dogs, give them some food and some lovin

find a good location and just kick back and daydream or read a book

as above with some good food

[NancyL]

OK, I'm not in my 20s and I don't really lack for female friends of my age in Chiang Mai, but these activities always pick-me-up:

having a good work-out at my health club and enjoying a long whirlpool bath afterwards. They have great towels!

visiting the local som tam shop for a meal where the staff fawns all over me because I can order a meal in Thai (and I always leave them a 5B tip, do you think that helps?)

enjoying spa services, like a manicure/pedicure or foot massage. The trick, at least in CM, is to find a place that has A/C, good soothing music and a quiet peaceful atmosphere.

checking out fashion ideas on the internet and then going to the fabric shops to purchase goods that the dressmaker can make into close approximations of what I found on the thin, much-younger models

spending time in the local western grocery store, really checking out their goods and trying to cook some new menu item for dinner

taking a shower at least three times daily and doing my hair and makeup again after each shower

eating our meals with our best china and silver. We brought this stuff to Thailand, we might as well use it everyday!

Don't know if this helps the OP, but it sure does me.

[eek]

Im with you on needing to workout Nancy. I work out most mornings, and it makes me feel good about myself. If a few days go by where i havent worked out i start to feel a bit antsy. I like the release of endorphins, and i like to feel strong, fit and healthy. Eating well, drinking lots of water, working out, taking care of myself..these are my basics for an everyday feeling of well being and happiness.

However, if im feeling down, it really depends.. but i tend not to wallow in self-pity. I will do something that makes me feel great. Achieve something, or maybe take time out and relax with a book at the pool. Anything that either relaxes me or makes me feel a sense of achievement. In times of stress, i meditate (im only a mere novice at this, but i find it helps).

But, i am also not much of a socialiser or "socialite"..i can go days without an actual face to face conversation. So..i rarely feel isolated. Im pretty happy in my own little world. Not enough hours in the day for everything i like to do tbh.

[sawatdeeyesitsme]

Definitely exercise! I never exercised back in the UK but since coming to Thailand I do. There is an aerobics class every evening in my village, which I go to. I've also recently taken up basketball and found I'm actually not bad at it. This is from the girl who was always picked last for sports at school.

I also like to get out on my scooter and do little road trips.

Make a point of phoning my best friend in the UK once a month and hear all her news and chatter non stop for an hour.

Go to my favourite sitting place and watch the sunset.

Go fishing.

Head to Bangkok at least once every 3 months to get away from my little village, go shopping and be anonymous. However, it seems that this does not guarantee me anonymity. The last time I went to Bangkok, I ended up going to Bang Saen to meet up with a male friend. We were walking along the beach and suddenly I heard my name being shouted. It happened to be a teacher from my school, with some of my students who were going to Chonburi for a sports competition >.< So after lots of photo taking and nudging and winking about my handsome male farang friend whether or he was my boyfriend, we went on our merry way. Only for me to arrive back at school on the Monday and everyone interrogating me on how long I had been with my boyfriend, what his name was, could they see a picture of him etc.

[Soulwy]

NancyL said: "taking a shower at least three times daily and doing my hair and makeup again after each shower"

... It is full time job!!!

I live a very quiet life, sometimes I don't speak for a couple of days, which I like. I do a lot of creative things at home, so I am not bored. And 'though I have a handful of social activities, I do feel blue sometimes.

My trick? Getting a bodyscrub & oil massage and eat Japanese. Is it this easy? Sometimes...

But I do understand the fact that it is not easy to find a 'close' girlfriend like you used to have in your homecountry. People come and go,come and go, so I feel we all are connecting but up to a certain degree. I guess it needs time to bond. Especially if you don't want to jump into every social scene in town you need to give yourself time to find like- minded, like-hearted people.