Worried About The Future.

[Nawtier]

I am becoming worried about impotence, my wife puts too much pressure on me to perform and as getting older wondering when the day will come.

Also concerned about the worrying bringing on the impotence earlier than natural onset.

Anybody had this ??

And how did you deal with it.

[Forethat]

Nothing to worry about - once it's permanently pointing southwards she'll find herself a young stud with a 12" schlong and your problems will be over. Nothing to worry about.

[OZEMADE]

Nothing to worry about - once it's permanently pointing southwards she'll find herself a young stud with a 12" schlong and your problems will be over. Nothing to worry about.

Maby if she was Nawtier than usual it would work again. Have to give myself an uppercut.

[IanForbes]

I'm 71 and I don't have that problem, but maybe it's because I'm not married and have lots of single lady friends. With long term couples I believe it has more to do with boredom than impotency. A man's virility naturally goes down hill when he grows older, but that shouldn't stop him from pleasuring a woman in other ways. And, a happy women tends to keep a many happy. But, worrying about it doesn't help the cause and usually ascerbates the problem. I know that if I'm with a woman who is not interested in being with me then it's difficult for me to be interested in her. I think that is where Viagra and Cialis are supposed to help.

[Richard4849]

You could also check and supplement testosterone levels, which naturally go down as one gets older (andropause -- the so-called male menopause).

[jackinbkk]

it's the land of viagra for those that need it. But yeah stress and worrying arent going to help.

Besides there's more to love making than just the in and out motion...

[Nawtier]

Besides there's more to love making than just the in and out motion...

Sure there is...

[meom]

I'm 71 and I don't have that problem, but maybe it's because I'm not married and have lots of single lady friends.

Or maybe it is because you don’t get any when you’re back in Canada for 6-7 months?

Everybody’s different and for some the mantra use it or lose it holds true while for others periods of abstinence improve one’s libido considerable.

I’m in the latter category meaning it fluctuates and I can go weeks without any until something clicks and then I can’t get enough of it for a couple of days.

[jackdawson]

embrace it

you will be free from carnal desire

and freedom is a good thing

[craigt3365]

Let's move this over to the Health Forum.

[Nawtier]

you will be free from carnal desire

Thats what I am worried about.......I have no desire to be free of it.....I like it too much.

I found myself thinking about rabbits the other night during sex.

I am sure if we leave the lights on one night I might end up with mrDroopy.

[kerryk]

After being checked out physically by a doctor and assuming you don't want to use the “variety is the spice of life cure......”

Sex is a two way street. It takes two people. Most women know little about male sex or if they do don't care about it or don't want to know about it or may find it disgusting.

There are some professionals who would have no trouble raising a dead man. Two clubs that I know of, one in BKK and the other in Pattaya that will guarantee you a positive experience and in most cases three times in one hour. That's right a money back guarantee even if you are an old coot.

If you wife loves you and is more interested in your happiness than societal mores. Pay for her to talk to one or two of the ladies at one of those clubs.

It is a whole lot less money than a psychiatrist or medication. I could tell you what those ladies do and so could some of the fellows in another forum on TV but it would be better to have the ladies speak to your wife directly. It is too bad this subject is so difficult for most couples to talk about.

My ex wife made a point of telling me after our divorce and her re marriage that she had gone to a counselor, learned how to be good in bed including an operation and kegel exercises.. I realize she told me after the fact to be hurtful but it would have been nice if she had tried while we were still married.

One of the advantages of having sex with your wife is not having to wear a condom. Too bad most women don't have the basic skills. Too bad someone does not teach them. Or maybe they don't want to learn, I don't know. You can blame it on the male for not providing the instruction but lets face it most guys don't have a clue that's why they get wrapped up in short time strumpets so easily. And different cultures are different. Thais are vanilla, Japanese are at the other extreme. In any event there is lots of information out there, you only have to look.

[backstairs]

Thais are vanilla, Japanese are at the other extreme. In any event there is lots of information out there, you only have to look.

Interesting comments just above. Could you illuminate one of your sentence please? Thais are vanilla, Japanese are at the other extreme.

[meom]

^

Vanilla is average, something like slam, bam, thank you mam.

Not all Thais are vanilla though and some can be quite creative specially the ones working in the clubs referred to by Kerry.

Taking a dump before you go there helps.

[kerryk]

Thais are vanilla, Japanese are at the other extreme. In any event there is lots of information out there, you only have to look.

Interesting comments just above. Could you illuminate one of your sentence please? Thais are vanilla, Japanese are at the other extreme.

Actually my interest in Japanese erotica is Thai oriented and age oriented. As I got older and did not have the old standbys of handsome head of hair and rippling muscles I began to look to other areas to stimulate my Thai lady. I noticed she along with many other Thai women like Japanese rock stars.

I researched Japanese erotica and got a couple of soft core movies for the both of us to watch. Bingo! She was very enthusiastic. One thing led to another and it added another dimension to our lives.

I don't know if Thai women are predisposed to like Japanese erotica more than other women or if they just like Japanese men. Whatever the reason it seems to work for me and I like to tie knots because of an early life as a boy scout. However should you walk this trail be very careful and do your homework before you begin. It is not vanilla and can be hazardous there is also a lot of fem dom stuff along with the normal male dom things. I have noticed Thai women are rarely content to be the subservient more than half the time.

Again let me add a note of caution. Do this with your significant other. Don't do it by yourself and then spring it on her as a surprise. It has to be a joint effort or you could be flirting with disaster.

If she has no interest, drop it.

[Nawtier]

3some's are a good passtime if this is allowed in your household.

[Route21]

Hi Nawtier

Just a quick point - are you taking any heart-related medication? If you are, you may want to check it out.

Some heart medications (Beta-blockers) cause problems in this area. A simple change of medication cures the problem completely!

[Route21]

Hi Nawtier

Just a quick point - are you taking any heart-related medication? If you are, you may want to check it out.

Some heart medications (Beta-blockers) cause problems in this area. A simple change of medication cures the problem completely!

Reference my earlier post, see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atenolol

[Pinot]

The old lead in the pencil issue.

Kamagra Gel? Use only 1/3 of a package to avoid headaches. Fold over the top and save the rest for the next time. A little porno before bed? A trapeze above the bed that you can propel her around in?

Just trying to help.

[Tanaka]

Your wife putting pressure on you to "perform"? It is not a race or a test that you need to perform. Sorry, I do understand what you mean and I feel she is really not pulling her weight in this. It is not for you to perform, it is a matter of mutual efforts to reach the best mutual results. You have been given several suggestions here but only you and your wife know what works for you. But it is always a two-way street. Oh well, with the possible exception of if you visit one of the two establishements mentioned before, then it's three-way.

My point is that she has to do whatever she can to find out what turns you on. And for you to her. You have to talk openly about everything. Don't hide or hold back.

[Nawtier]

Its always about her....I get butterflies everytime I crawl into the cot.

[Naam]

I am becoming worried about impotence, my wife puts too much pressure on me to perform and as getting older wondering when the day will come.

Also concerned about the worrying bringing on the impotence earlier than natural onset.

stop worrying about impotence. no man is impotent unless he is a quadruplegic and suffers from paralysis of his tongue

[Naam]

Its always about her....I get butterflies everytime I crawl into the cot.

the advantage the ladies have over us is that a hole does not require an erection

[moe666]

They cannot keep it shut most of the time, yayayayay.

I went to a Naturalpathic Dr here in the states a week ago and she discovered I wasn't absorbing my food very well and had low zinc levels. She put me on liguid zinc 15mg once a day. A few days later man o man erections right and left. The zinc blocks conversion of testosterone to estrogen a problem as we grow older. I have now increased dosage to 45mg a day as we need a bit of zinc to carry out a few body functions. before viagra you may want to try zinc no more than 90mg a day.

Edited June 13, 2011 by moe666

[Phil Conners]

Hi Nawtier

Just a quick point - are you taking any heart-related medication? If you are, you may want to check it out.

Some heart medications (Beta-blockers) cause problems in this area. A simple change of medication cures the problem completely!

Actually uncontrolled hypertension is at least as bad for your libido as the drugs that control it.

Consider also that Viagra was discovered researching anti-hypertensive drugs.

[tim armstrong]

Hi Nawtier,

Yes the blood pressure medication is a big factor for some as it does dampen arousal. Prostate treatment where testosterone has been lowered is the other big 'downer'.But as others have said anxiety about not performing can become a self fulfilling prophesy, so if you think about it enough early in the evening, by the time you go to bed, your mindset just won't allow you to get an erection.

From my experience of counselling middle aged couples with this problem the biggest issue is simply talking about it. If you have a good relationship with your wife, tell her that you are worried about sex. Avoid telling her that she is too demanding. Suggest that less frequency and pressure to perform might produce better sex. Also check out that she doesn't think you have another woman.

As others have indicated, many people find this area too difficult to talk about, but when they do, often couples can find other ways of getting pleasure. The worst thing you can do is to keep on plugging away in the same old position,with both of you getting more and more frustrated.

Interestingly, its usually women whose libido dies first, but maybe your wife is much younger, which is a larger issue.

[Nawtier]

The missionary position has served well for 20 odd years......not about to change