Got A Girl Pregnent Need Advice What To Do

[tingtonguk2012]

Anyway haters need not to reply I know I have made a big mistake.

So I'm going back hom at the end of this month and turns out I got this girl pregnent. We got close the lastt month but no way I want to keep seeing her or have a baby at my age.

Do't have any plans on staying her as I got a job at home what do I do just go back home and be a pr!ck and foret them or try and come out once a year and visit I dunno I'm to young for this. My parents are going to be mad how the hell can I tell them I got some thai bird pregnent?

Edited February 7, 2012 by Crossy
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[GuestHouse]

May I be the first to congratulate you and welcome you to the world of parenthood.

My advice, start saving early for college fees.

[tingtonguk2012]

well that was a helpfull reply thank you

[necronx99]

well that was a helpfull reply thank you

Try explaining the situation to them as an accident and make plans to support the child.

Realize that they will be upset, but that's life, you rolled the dice, live with it.

Or, as you seem to have made up your mind to do a runner and abandon them, do't tell your parents at all and just write it off.

Leave now and never look back, maybe he still has time to convince some other sap it's his baby.

Lots of Thai men knock up girls and abandon them. Love is a strange thing.....

[dereklev]

well that was a helpfull reply thank you

It was a helpful reply College Fees are very expensive.

A child is for life not something you leave behind after a holiday jolly.

Wether you want to be with the mother or not the child is your responsibility and if this inconveniences you too bad.

Be a man not a kid and live up to those responsibilities!!!!

[Chang_paarp]

do the crime, do the time.

Forgo a beer or two a week,and/or that extra coffee in the morning and send the money to the family, and hopefully it will get spent on the kid. You will be doing more than most.

Of course you could apply for custody and raise the kid, but that might show some commitment.

[crudy21]

Get a DNA test at least.

[fredtitmus]

yes defo get a test and are you 100% sure she is pregnant? she knows your going home this month,could even be a scam to get you to send some money over!

[WAYNEandAEI]

If it is your child, (which needs to be determined through testing), your thoughts and responsibilities should be for the unborn not with how you are going to tell your parents. You do adult stuff, time to act like one. Sorry if its not the advice you are after.

Edited February 6, 2012 by WAYNEandAEI

[Ulysses G.]

The only decent thing to do is marry her and pay to support her, her family and the baby untill it turns 18. Any other decision would just not be cricket old chap.

Edited February 6, 2012 by Ulysses G.

[rod2011]

A pregnancy test and a DNA test when the baby is born.

If it is yours then you have to step up and 'take care'.

[meatboy]

next time keep your brains in your pants.i hope she's got your phone no.mummy/daddy will be pleased,and go visit the clinic.

[SlyAnimal]

Kids in Thailand are significantly cheaper than in your home country.

Your gf's family come from the countryside? or BKK? And do you want to keep her as a gf, or was she just a holiday shag?

Either way, send her a little bit of money every few months (Minimum maybe 10k Baht every 3 months should be sufficient), and tell her that she should go and live with her family in the countryside (She might be ashamed to go back with a baby but no husband, but meh lol), that should be enough. Don't be extorted into paying more unless you personally feel like contributing more, as the baby itself will only require around 10k every 3 months (Assuming her family doesn't live in BKK, if so then maybe 15k)

If you want to keep her as a gf/gik, then give her a little more, around 10k every month (maybe 15k if she's in BKK), is around the same salary as what she'd get if she had a university degree and was working. That'll be enough to take care of her + baby + maybe a little left over for her family.

Also don't be worried about the "Oh now you have to save for university/college for your kid" bullshit. University students can borrow money from the govt for both their tuition and living costs, then repay it at their own leisure. If your gf got pregnant to a Thai guy, she'd get nothing, so anything she gets is significantly better by having a half farang kid (since then her son/daughter is more handsome/beautiful lol)

Edited February 7, 2012 by SlyAnimal

[Petesear]

It would help if we had a little more information..

Who is this girl that you believe you made pregnant?

Are/were you in a relationship?

Is she from a bar, how well do you know her?

Who first decided protection wasn't necessary?

It could be that she is not really pregnant, that she is pregnant and was before she meet you or that she is pregnant with your child.

So, you could walk away or send her money. When the child is born have a DNA test done and then take it from there.. Some hard choices need to be made.. All the best

[chris2004]

A friend of my girlfriend has just got pregnant from a farang she was seeing. The bastard just did a runner when he found out. She had an abortion but the prick didn't even help her with the costs or support her till she could start work again. If you wouldn't take care of the child at least help the girl till she is able to work again.

[ludditeman]

Buy a pregnancy test, stand outside the bathroom while she 'wees' on it. Takes 10 mins, costs 60bht.

If it is positive

Go along to the local government hospital, have them give her a test.

If positive

They will give you both blood tests, hers free, yours about 300bht.

Those are the first steps as abortion is illegal in Thailand.

PS

@Chris, don't assume Thai law and moral codes are the same as the west.

Edited February 7, 2012 by ludditeman

[meatboy]

A friend of my girlfriend has just got pregnant from a farang she was seeing. The bastard just did a runner when he found out. She had an abortion but the prick didn't even help her with the costs or support her till she could start work again. If you wouldn't take care of the child at least help the girl till she is able to work again.

wouldnt surprise me if the op didnt give her f-all in the first place.i have met a few dickheads 30years in los.

[steve187]

How do you know she is pregnant?

how do you know its yours?

If it is yours you will have to support and give the child your countries nationality, give the child a fairer chance in the future.

[geriatrickid]

well that was a helpfull reply thank you

Are you sure you had carnal relations with a woman? Some foreigners can't tell in the dark if they are pounding a kathoey or not,, particularly the guys that would impregnate a woman and then do a runner.

If it was a woman, how do you know she is actually pregnant, and how do you know it is your child?

Edited February 7, 2012 by geriatrickid

[harrry]

Might be an idea to get a HIV test too.

[Petesear]

Might be an idea to get a HIV test too.

Yes, and the OP should get one while she has hers...

[Mirth]

Just ask her what she wants. It's either lump sum or marriage.

Be careful not to be overly aggressive cos she can cry rape and you will be in bigger trouble. Happened to a worker's husband once and he's Thai. You're a foreigner. Whatever it is, be tactful with the situation you are in as long as you are still in country.

Anyway haters need not to reply I know I have made a big mistake.

So I'm going back hom at the end of this month and turns out I got this girl pregnent. We got close the lastt month but no way I want to keep seeing her or have a baby at my age.

Do't have any plans on staying her as I got a job at home what do I do just go back home and be a pr!ck and foret them or try and come out once a year and visit I dunno I'm to young for this. My parents are going to be mad how the hell can I tell them I got some thai bird pregnent?

[KeyserSoze01]

Buy a pregnancy test, stand outside the bathroom while she 'wees' on it. Takes 10 mins, costs 60bht.

One of the oldest scams in the book. She screwed up though in that she was supposed to wait until you got home before she told you.

If in fact she is preggers and you are the father, congratulations and commiserations.

[FreedomDude]

I made the same "mistake" as the original poster; however, it was the best "mistake" I ever made! Do whatever it takes to stay in your child's daily life. It's not about money, but about the time you spend with him/her. This could be the greatest experience of your life.

[TAWP]

A neighbours (dead) grandpa just went into the hospital. Atleast that is what she told her sugardad.

[azzo1]

Dude, my current Thai wife tricked me for 2 years while I was overseas working. Said she was pregnant a couple of times in 2 years only to find out when I got back home to LOS it didn't happen. She was just testing me, albeit at that time I had no idea about the Thai tomates. But we are as happily married now as much as it can be and I have a wonderful 10 year old son. You bhave been given good advice on this forum. Good Luck

[pauljones]

Just the other day there was an article in a Thai paper about the pregnancy scam.

Girls injecting silicone into their stomachs to entrap boyfriends into paying abortion fees.

"Instead of just stuffing a pillow up her shirt, Kaew "impregnated" herself with silicone.

Like other popular types of surgery that enlarges selected parts of the body, she got hers in her belly for the reasonable price of B3,000, which suggests it is a pretty standard procedure. With her new belly, she duped many men to pay for her "abortion".

[bangkokburning]

my 2 baht:

Take her to hospital for pregnancy test

Take her for DNA test

IF IT IS YOUR KID and she is game for an abortion and there is somewhere you can have this done, its obviously best for you. So, if it is your chid - offer her some BIG stupid money. Like 100K+, this will obviously work itself out in the longrun. Bear in mind the psychological repercussions of the action simply becasue of your assinine mistake of not wearing a condom!!

Go home and work, you had stated that you are not committed to her, fine. You should be committed to the child you created by having sex without a condom or vasectomy.

In instances with Thai's usually the couple marries for a few years to legitimize the child/woman, then separates later. If you already know she is not yours forever no need to make a drama and move here, lose your job/career/life, have all sorts of lifelong visa hassles - just send the monnee.

Send some small money as an infant requires

Send money as a child requires

Send money as a teen requires

and if you are a decent guy - send money directly to the teen for college (not mom) with reciept of university paperwork.

OR... you can do the shitty thing like a friend of mine and just bolt -

JUST ONE MORE REASON SEX WITHOUT A CONDOM IS A REALLY BAD IDEA

Edited February 7, 2012 by bangkokburning

[DocN]

If it is your child, act like a man and not like a coward.

Tell your GF about your feelings, but offer her help (financial) for her and the baby.

Your parents are second priority. Shit happens, but at least do the honorable thing and don't back out of it like a pussy!

[bangkokburning]

For anyone reading this of interest:

If you have no interest in having children - get a vasectomy! Even though I religiously wore condoms while I was up to no good, I never had to worry about pregnancy. Real or imagined. I even went to far as to obtain a note from the urologist - stating two tests, no sperm.

Sorry honey - it's not mine. A vasectomy and a condom pretty much ensures that as fact.