A Real Shoot Gun Wedding

[chownah]

................

She is hot too, 15 at the time, mint. Cant blame him.

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<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Isn't this getting awfully close to a pedophilic remark?

[cdnvic]

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She is hot too, 15 at the time, mint. Cant blame him.

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Isn't this getting awfully close to a pedophilic remark?

Not when her admirer was a 17 year old.

Be VERY careful with accusations like that as it can be a fast ticket out of here.

cv

[sierra01]

Is a forced marriage really the best way to go for these kids? It may be customary, traditional and whatnot but I wouldn't put any money on the marriage lasting very long, it would be a divorce waiting to happen.

Saving face is more important than common sense.....sad.

[LaoPo]

Saving face is more important than common sense.....sad.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Very right.

Losing face is an important matter, all over Asia, more so than common sense. But we shouldn't forget that this happens in a poor countryside with probably poor families with low education where money is of great importance.

So, it's a 'must' marriage, just like 40-70 years ago in Europe (maybe shorter in some countries) where 'must' marriages also existed...

I had one....but my ex and I were very much in love and WANTED to escape the strict family-rules...

That's different than these cases in Thailand where 'losing face-and-money' is of such an importance.

LaoPo

[sierra01]

Short term financial gain by people other than the couple in question, against long term unhappiness for the couple in question, unless divorce steps in, then the girl has even less chance of a happy life. Strange world.

Too many years ago than I care to remember my then g/f's parents found out that she was on the pill, and we were pushed into marriage, both aged 19. It staggered along for 4 years and is one of the biggest mistakes of my life. As an individual I learnt a lot from that, as a nation Thailand learns nothing from Riggers story.

[LaoPo]

Short term financial gain by people other than the couple in question, against long term unhappiness for the couple in question, unless divorce steps in, then the girl has even less chance of a happy life.  Strange world.

Too many years ago than I care to remember my then g/f's parents found out that she was on the pill, and we were pushed into marriage, both aged 19.  It staggered along for 4 years and is one of the biggest mistakes of my life.  As an individual I learnt a lot from that, as a nation Thailand learns nothing from  Riggers story.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Me too...but I beat you; I survived 23 years into that 1st marriage and...even more astonishing: my newly wedded wife and myself had a very nice 2nd Christmasday-dinner at my ex-wife's place

My present wife even bought very nice clothes at my ex's shop and had a very big discount

LaoPo

[Thai Chi]

Saving face is more important than common sense.....sad.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Very right.

Losing face is an important matter, all over Asia, more so than common sense. But we shouldn't forget that this happens in a poor countryside with probably poor families with low education where money is of great importance.

So, it's a 'must' marriage, just like 40-70 years ago in Europe (maybe shorter in some countries) where 'must' marriages also existed...

I had one....but my ex and I were very much in love and WANTED to escape the strict family-rules...

That's different than these cases in Thailand where 'losing face-and-money' is of such an importance.

LaoPo

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

LaoPo, great posts and insights and all that sorta stuff, but can you piss off that BLUE writing. Its giving me a headache

[LaoPo]

LaoPo, great posts and insights and all that sorta stuff, but can you piss off that BLUE writing. Its giving me a headache

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sorry Daddy....but I'm a bit of colourblind.....this one is in black, ok?

LaoPo

[Thai Chi]

LaoPo, great posts and insights and all that sorta stuff, but can you piss off that BLUE writing. Its giving me a headache

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sorry Daddy....but I'm a bit of colourblind.....this one is in black, ok?

LaoPo

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thanks LaoPo, thats much better. How do you go with the traffic lights

[LaoPo]

LaoPo, great posts and insights and all that sorta stuff, but can you piss off that BLUE writing. Its giving me a headache

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sorry Daddy....but I'm a bit of colourblind.....this one is in black, ok?

LaoPo

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thanks LaoPo, thats much better. How do you go with the traffic lights

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Now THAT's an awful colour Daddy! hurts MY eyes!

Traffic lights?....Where?

Just close my eyes and cross..............

LaoPo

[chownah]

if he didn,t marry they where going to bring the police in.

Can anyone explain to me what is the law with regards to situations like this?

Cheers.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I'd like to know what the law is with regards to situations like this too.

[Rigger]

update

Girls family is happy,

young girls is happy as my wife just went and spoke with the family and they have desided that she will stay at school,

MIL happy as it will settle BIL down

My wife is happy as she has new family friend

BIL has excepted it and is probably happy that he can pork her when he likes now

Farang no happy because even if farang says he no pay he knows in the long run he pay

[LaoPo]

update

Girls family is happy,

young girls is happy as my wife just went and spoke with the family and they have desided that she will stay at school,

MIL happy as it will settle BIL down

My wife is happy as she has new family friend

BIL has excepted it and is probably happy that he can pork her when he likes now

Farang no happy because even if farang says he no pay he knows in the long run he pay

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

since you told your wife to sell some of her gold-jewelry for the dowry....

So, how much is the dowry.....will your wife be 'naked' without any jewelry? and....WHO paid for her golden jewelry?

Well, apart from yourself , everybody is happy

LaoPo

[Rigger]

update

Girls family is happy,

young girls is happy as my wife just went and spoke with the family and they have desided that she will stay at school,

MIL happy as it will settle BIL down

My wife is happy as she has new family friend

BIL has excepted it and is probably happy that he can pork her when he likes now

Farang no happy because even if farang says he no pay he knows in the long run he pay

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

since you told your wife to sell some of her gold-jewelry for the dowry....

So, how much is the dowry.....will your wife be 'naked' without any jewelry? and....WHO paid for her golden jewelry?

Well, apart from yourself , everybody is happy

LaoPo

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Wife has many years of studying and collecting gold(@#$% EXPERT) so she will still be left with a just one chain and bracelet (POOR THING) dowry is 100k and 1 baht gold.

So I guess she will want more gold for x mass and birthdays

The more I think about it if I cant beat them I my well join them pay the money and be done with it

If I could Just drink 8 bottles of chang I am sure it wouldn,t seem so bad

[chownah]

since you told your wife to sell some of her gold-jewelry for the dowry....

So, how much is the dowry.....will your wife be 'naked' without any jewelry? and....WHO paid for her golden jewelry?

Well, apart from yourself , everybody is happy

LaoPo

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well, I'm not happy. I still want to know what the law is about calling the cops like in El Tel's post above.

[Rigger]

since you told your wife to sell some of her gold-jewelry for the dowry....

So, how much is the dowry.....will your wife be 'naked' without any jewelry? and....WHO paid for her golden jewelry?

Well, apart from yourself , everybody is happy

LaoPo

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well, I'm not happy. I still want to know what the law is about calling the cops like in El Tel's post above.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I dont think that ther is such a law that they have to marry

Not that they would care about the law anyway I think it is just isaan village law

[RamdomChances]

Ok I'll make a stab at the law thing, if she is under 17(mabye 19) and the parents dont consent to her having sex, the man could be charged with statutory rape. http://www.ageofconsent.com/thailand.htm has some info on the age of consent but I'm not sure how accurate it is. It states that the age is 15, but I've read links before(that I can't find) that state children dont reach their full majority until 19. If you marry an 18 year old her parents have to sign to consent, under 17 it has to go before a judge.

Anyway its a bit vauge and but I think the answer lies somewhere with the parentel consent issue.

Dont take the above as fact as I could well be wrong and I can't actually find any referances to back it up and am just going by things I've heard and read before.

RC

Edited January 3, 2006 by RamdomChances

[mpdkorat]

Ok I'll make a stab at the law thing, if she is under 17(mabye 19) and the parents dont consent to her having sex, the man could be charged with statutory rape. http://www.ageofconsent.com/thailand.htm  has some info on the age of consent but I'm not sure how accurate it is. It states that the age is 15, but I've read links before(that I can't find) that state children dont reach their full majority until 19. If you marry an 18 year old her parents have to sign to consent, under 17 it has to go before a judge.

Anyway its a bit vauge and but I think the answer lies somewhere with the parentel consent issue.

Dont take the above as fact as I could well be wrong and I can't actually find any referances to back it up and am just going by things I've heard and read before.

RC

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I believe that a girl does not reach her full majority till she is twenty and will need parents consent to marry, under that age. If parents consent they can marry at 15. Girls can consent to have sex at the age of 18, under the age of 18 you are commiting an offence, and the younger they are the more trouble you are in. That is my understanding??

[tavarich]

Well my wife’s 18 year old brother was caught in bed with a young village girl last night and now the family wants them to marry. The wife tells me they turned up at home last night looking for there daughter and her brother they then searched the village and found them sleeping together. The brother has done a runner and hasn’t been seen since and her family and my wife’s family are in a discussion now about weather they will marry and how much the dowry will be

The brother doesn’t want to marry

I have told my wife I will not be paying for any dowry but she can sell some of her gold to pay the dowry as I can’t see it being to high.

I will post more after talking to the wife tomorrow to find out what they decide to do

Since this thread died, I was wondering if the couple were still together? Something similar happend to some relatives up country. It got me to thinking about your story, Any updates.

[mogoso]

The more I think about it if I cant beat them I my well join them pay the money and be done with it

If I could Just drink 8 bottles of chang I am sure it wouldn,t seem so bad

Heck if I drank 8 bottles of Chang, even Islam wouldn't seem that bad