theblether Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 If you mention Thailand many people think about sex tourism right away. There is a perception that every guy that turns up in Thailand is some kind of sexual wolf. I have met several guys in Thailand who are literally too shy to speak to women. To a lot of us this sounds remarkable, however I bet if you thought about it you would know guys in this category. I have spoken to a few guys and been a little bit amazed at how difficult they find it to converse with the opposite sex. I've had them ask me how to go about it and my advice is always not to think about things too much.....and not to put pressure on themselves. I think in many cases there is an inate fear of rejection........do you know anyone who suffers from shyness?......and how would you advise them? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreenSnapper Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 It's easy: get rejected 100 times and you don't think about it anymore. In the meantime, you have a few non-rejections. Guys take women too serious. There are billions out there, so why make a fuzz? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted August 23, 2012 Author Share Posted August 23, 2012 For me and you GS that is the right attitude.....there are a lot if guys who have such a deep fear of rejection that they withdraw into themselves....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arthurwait Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 (edited) I put a banana in my pocket yesterday as my hands were full and forgot about it. About an hour later I was reminded of the time when I was a teenage boy too shy to talk to girls. Edited August 23, 2012 by arthurwait 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notmyself Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Never seen it myself. There was one fella from Serbia a couple of years back (fresh off the boat) who asked me why all the staff at the local bars were female. He was seriously shocked when I explained. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreenSnapper Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 For me and you GS that is the right attitude.....there are a lot if guys who have such a deep fear of rejection that they withdraw into themselves....... There are people who fear escalators. The right treatment is to push yourself to use them, until it is nothing special. What happens if a woman rejects you? Nothing. So the right training is going fo the rejection, not going for the shag. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted August 23, 2012 Author Share Posted August 23, 2012 (edited) Has anybody else seen it? By the way Arthur........you can probably remember a teenage rejection that cut deep? I remember working up my courage to ask a girl out for the first time......and I was rejected. That was a sore one......but using the idea suggested by GS I soon got over it. Maybe some of these guys didn't? In fact maybe some guys lost so much confidence after the break of previous relationships it left them scarred? . Edited August 23, 2012 by theblether Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arthurwait Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Has anybody else seen it? By the way Arthur........you can probably remember a teenage rejection that cut deep? I remember working up my courage to ask a girl out for the first time......and I was rejected. That was a sore one......but using the idea suggested by GS I soon got over it. Maybe some of these guys didn't? In fact maybe some guys lost so much confidence after the break of previous relationships it left them scarred? . You pushed someone on an escalator ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 He who dares wins innit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arthurwait Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 He who dares wins innit? Indeed they make it to the very top. Of the escalator. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waza Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 haha sounds like a character in the big bang theory, Selective mutism (SM) is a psychiatric disorder in which a person who is normally capable of speech is unable to speak in given situations or to specific people. Selective mutism usually co-exists with shyness or social anxiety.[1] Although my wife believes I suffer from this as when she speaks to me she usually only gets grunts in return Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Has anybody else seen it? By the way Arthur........you can probably remember a teenage rejection that cut deep? I remember working up my courage to ask a girl out for the first time......and I was rejected. That was a sore one......but using the idea suggested by GS I soon got over it. Maybe some of these guys didn't? In fact maybe some guys lost so much confidence after the break of previous relationships it left them scarred? . Yes theblether I cried and cried until I had no more tears left. Then I remembered it was my fourteenth birthday the next day and cheered up somewhat. Luckily there was nothing much else to do in my small fishing village so the girls were always well up for some fun. Multiple rejection over many years....seriously you would need to ,lower your sights or get some counselling. Finding women aint that tough...there are loads of them out there looking for you anyway.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted August 23, 2012 Author Share Posted August 23, 2012 Smokie don't mention "Who Dares Wins".........you know that just attracts those ex-army types. Bad boy. @waza.......one of these days you gonna grunt once too much and you'll grow a little piggies tail. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waza Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 (edited) Smokie don't mention "Who Dares Wins".........you know that just attracts those ex-army types. Bad boy. @waza.......one of these days you gonna grunt once too much and you'll grow a little piggies tail. The wife says I should stop doing it cos I am behaving like a Thai guy jing jing Edited August 23, 2012 by waza 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Sorry Del.....anyway here's a musical interlude.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nKWbMJOIkUk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted August 23, 2012 Author Share Posted August 23, 2012 So that's where you get your fashion tips from Smokie?????...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 So that's where you get your fashion tips from Smokie?????...... Do you like my hair? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SiameseOracle Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 (edited) For me and you GS that is the right attitude.....there are a lot if guys who have such a deep fear of rejection that they withdraw into themselves....... Out of polite curiosity, are you surrounded by women in your own country who consider you a paragon of: 1. masculinity 2. desirability 3. smoldering male sexuality. You say that "there is a perception that every guy that turns up in Thailand is some kind of sexual wolf" There isn't. Replace the word "wolf" with "inadequate". All western women know the truth, by the way. Edited August 23, 2012 by SiameseOracle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacktrip Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 nobody is shy with everyone. it usually means you dont dig who you are with but are to timid to admit it and walk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted August 23, 2012 Author Share Posted August 23, 2012 For me and you GS that is the right attitude.....there are a lot if guys who have such a deep fear of rejection that they withdraw into themselves....... Out of polite curiosity, are you surrounded by women in your own country who consider you a paragon of: 1. masculinity 2. desirability 3. smoldering male sexuality. You say that "there is a perception that every guy that turns up in Thailand is some kind of sexual wolf" There isn't. Replace the word "wolf" with "inadequate". All western women know the truth, by the way. I wasn't asking you to give us a self assessment, however if that is how you feel about yourself I would recommend you visit a good counsellor. On the other hand, I suppose you are the type of person this thread is all about, maybe you can explain to us......where did it all go wrong for you?? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WinnieTheKhwai Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 The less you try, the more interested women get. Go about your ways, do your own thing, then the challenge becomes to *avoid* getting into a relationship. But if you must, it'll be on your terms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GuestHouse Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Shock Horror - The OP has discovered foreign men in Thailand who have problems relating to women. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WinnieTheKhwai Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 The less you try, the more interested women get. Go about your ways, do your own thing, then the challenge becomes to *avoid* getting into a relationship. But if you must, it'll be on your terms. To which I can further add: and once you relent and get in that relationship, then the floodgates REALLY open, as Thai women seem to go in overdrive for a guy who already has a girlfriend. Strange effect, that. And the happier your relationship, the harder they try. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pigeonjake Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 walk into a bar with a thousand bht note behind each ear,, that whoud do the trick, sorry couldnt resist,,, jake Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barefoot1988 Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 just bring them to the correct place. i was shy too when i first arrived here but not so after my butt got so bruised from all the random pinching Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theblether Posted August 24, 2012 Author Share Posted August 24, 2012 Shock Horror - The OP has discovered foreign men in Thailand who have problems relating to women. No they don't.......a minority do. There are mucho plentio foreign guys living in Thailand that wouldn't have a problem dating ladies anywhere. I have no doubt you would put yourself in that category. Just sayin' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dean999 Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 just bring them to the correct place. i was shy too when i first arrived here but not so after my butt got so bruised from all the random pinching We are all grown ups here, you can tell the truth about your sore ass. Was it men girls with high pitched voices and tall, that left you sore? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
true blue Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 The less you try, the more interested women get. Go about your ways, do your own thing, then the challenge becomes to *avoid* getting into a relationship. But if you must, it'll be on your terms. To which I can further add: and once you relent and get in that relationship, then the floodgates REALLY open, as Thai women seem to go in overdrive for a guy who already has a girlfriend. Strange effect, that. And the happier your relationship, the harder they try. strange world you must live in,ive been married twice, to ladies from chiang mai and ive never once had a approach,from my ladies friends,and they both have a very large amount of thai girl friends.no disrepect,but i suppose it must boil down to were one keeps company.maybe im dipping out somewere,any tips. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 The less you try, the more interested women get. Go about your ways, do your own thing, then the challenge becomes to *avoid* getting into a relationship. But if you must, it'll be on your terms. To which I can further add: and once you relent and get in that relationship, then the floodgates REALLY open, as Thai women seem to go in overdrive for a guy who already has a girlfriend. Strange effect, that. And the happier your relationship, the harder they try. strange world you must live in,ive been married twice, to ladies from chiang mai and ive never once had a approach,from my ladies friends,and they both have a very large amount of thai girl friends.no disrepect,but i suppose it must boil down to were one keeps company.maybe im dipping out somewere,any tips. You have never had a physical approach ?, but, you are not perhaps able to feel the mental/vibe approach. Some of us have , good gun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cobalt60 Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 Huh, the som tam lady told my mrs straight out, as she was beating seven shades of <deleted> out of a little blue crab, that she wanted me. Must have been a slow day in the market. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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