Son Struggling To Cope With 2 Languages

[MartyC]

Ok I know my son is only three and a half but he is struggling to talk. He understands English and says the odd word but has no understanding of Thai. Is it normal for dual nationality kids to be late talkers? We have put him in international school since January and there is small improvement. Basically I want to feel good if people have similar problems :-)

[Colonel_Mustard]

Purely from my own observation, it seems to me that children that have 2 languages to learn from birth, tend to start off with both languages more slowly than monolingual children but then they catch up well a bit later and from then on in are in a good position.

So basically I would say that you haven't really got too much to worry about at this stage. By putting him in an international school, you are doing all that you can and he'll get a lot more individual attention there if there does turn out to be any problem. Just keep encouraging him at home as much as possible too.

[MartyC]

Cheers colonel mustard

[wonder6281]

My son is 2 1/2 and is the same, speaks little of anything other than his own language. He understands English more than Thai. I am not overly concerned given his age and task set him to take up two languages. I have started to sit him in front of the TV to watch YouTube videos of ABC etc and he doesn't move. I have even heard him trying to copy the words and sounds.

We have also bought some books where we sit and go through the alphabet and do some colouring in. My wife is tackling the Thai and I'm doing the English. Over time he will begin to speak.

Good luck but I think all will be good once they get started, there will be no stopping them.

[Waterloo]

Everything I have read on the subject agrees with what the Colonel has said, our little boy is just under 2 1/2 only speaks the odd word & I reckon his comtempories are ahead of him with the number of words they have, not worried in the slightest.

His comprehension seems quit good especially as he is having to process 3 languages, his mother speaks both Thai & Cambodian to him & I speak English, we both ask him to do things in our own languages & he understands & responds to simple instructions no matter which language is used.

Good Luck & enjoy these precious moments

[Newguy70]

Hi Everyone,

I agree with a lot of the prior posts. Our son is 1 year and 21 months, and his oral language skills seems somewhat slow. However he responds to both of us when we speak to him in Thai and English (mother Thai/ myself American). I see no reason for concern at this point from what I have read regarding bilingual children. I have also included the following links to my dropbox which include some .pdf regarding the subject matter. Hope this helps....

https://dl.dropbox.com/u/31000782/Bilingual_Child.pdf

https://dl.dropbox.com/u/31000782/Language%20Development.pdf

Good luck!

Edited March 3, 2013 by Newguy70

[lemoncake]

Being one of those kids myself(well many years ago) my suggestion is at home speak only English, he will know Thai from school and surroundings.

I was born in an English speaking country, but language spoken at home for as long as i can remember was mother's native tongue.

Naturally i speak both fluently, fluently to a point that my mother's native tongue people do not even hear any accent and believe i was born in their country

[krisb]

Friend of mine has a 4 year old daughter. His family have taught her Russian and the wifes speak only English. The kids teachers have told the mother that the daughter has learning problems related to being taught 2 languages. Interesting observation by her teachers.

My thoughts are the child perhaps will struggle a bit as anyone would learning 2 languages. Its not like they are already fluent in 1 and therefore only learning the other. I wouldnt worry to much, your child is still young. Let them learn at their pace, no 2 kids are the same right?

If you search around google, there is heaps on children learning more than 1 language. Have a look, and good luck!

[MartyC]

Thanks again everyone, I actually got him singing Liv-er-pool this morning watching Match Of The Day on Internet. Brought a tear to my eye.

[mike123ca]

I have a son ( 7 years) and daughter ( 4 years) and they both speak English and Thai.

Don't worry about the lack of communication because it does take bilingual kids longer to start

talking and when they do, they just forget how to stop talking.

Enjoy the quiet times because when it's gone, it's gone for good.

[Deserted]

It's quite normal. Children need more time for two languages and cannot distinguish between them well at 3. I would only worry if your child gets to 6-7 and there are obvious difficulties.

[fletchsmile]

It's not uncommon for bi-lingual kids to start speaking later.

If your child is speaking one language in preference to another then at least you know there is nothing physical to worry about. Which language the child speaks (or both) will come down largely to which they get most exposure to, and if they get good exposure to both they end up speaking both well.

You say he understands English and says the odd word. At 3 and a half, to be honest I'd expect him to be saying a bit more, even if he has a bias for one language. If in your shoes I'd get him checked out to see if there is nothing physically wrong with his hearing. In all likelihood there may well be no problem. There's very little downside to a medical check, but if there were someone wrong the good news is you have caught things early, and can adjust earlier. Plus then you have peace of mind.

For our youngest she was about 2 and a half when she started school. Her Thai was better than her English. After a couple of weeks at school, she just stopped talking altogether at school. We knew there was no physical problem as she talked at home. The teachers didn't have any explanation, and just said kids develop at their own pace. I asked other people in education, and no-one had a real answer, except kids vary and will do in their own time. We started to get a bit worried, imagining if there was a physchological cause or something had happened. We still don't know for sure. Anyway a couple of months later, when she moved up a class (we started her half way thru a year), she started speaking again at school.

One of the things I think contributed was that there were kids at school who spoke no Thai and very little English so would use a third language first at that age. This was probably confusing so she waited until again socially ready. It was also probably combined with a lot of new things to take in, as well as being the youngest in the class. We tried all sorts to encourage her, offers of reward, threat of punishment, highlighting how nice it was when other kids spoke at school, how her teacher/we would be proud etc etc but she just waited for her own time.

Bottom line all sorts of things can happen with kids around different languages. No harm in having a physical check just in case though, for peace of mind.

BTW I sometimes wish I had found the secret of stopping her talking so I could apply to her mum as well

Edited March 7, 2013 by fletchsmile

[tartempion]

I have a two years young baby girl, mother mostly speaks Thai, I try to speak English to her.

She talks a lot, 90% Thai 10% English.

This morning jumping out her bed she told me: "Take out pamper" (she does sleep with a pamper)

When she wants to come out of her bath she tells me "come out" etc etc.

In fact since two weeks she copies whatever I say in whatever language, guess she forgets most of it, but still surprised when overhearing an overseas phone call a few days ago before I ended the conversation she said "Dag Jeanne, bye bye"

It doesn't bother me the least she might be mixing several languages, she will sort it out later>

I hope by the age of 3 we will communicate decently in English and I will start talking French or German or Dutch to her.

A funny thing happened last week, we had a cake and sang Happy Birthday for her birthday 13th of February.

She also has an Angry bird outfit and asked me to give her Angry Birthday outfit a few days ago.

Edited March 8, 2013 by tartempion

[IsaanUSA]

I'm curious about something. If the husband is from a non-English speaking country, wife is Thai, couple speaks English together, and live in his country....what languages are normally taught to the child? I would assume the native country language and parent's language. But do the children get taught Thai? I live in the USA, and the few luk kreungs I have met speak English only.

[Forethat]

In my opinion, it's perfectly normal for bi- or multilingual children to develop their speech a bit later than other kids. I have had the same problem with both my kids. There's a lot of frustration involved, especially since a lot of other skills you'd want to promote require communication. Potty-training, for instance; how can you start potty-training when the child can tell you they need to wee...? This is all normal as long as there's not a hearing problem or other condition hampering speech (autism for instance; if your child doesn't communicate at all by pointing or similar this could be a warning sign).

I was worried sick with for daughter who didn't talk at all when she was 3, but one day it was like everything kicked in, and she spoke three languages effortlessly. Funny thing is, she spent her first two years in Thailand, during which she got exposed to Thai from all directions but didn't speak one word - today she still uses a couple of Thai words in favor of English. It is like her brain picked up words in Thai and they somehow got stuck even though she never used them. One year later when she began talking she looks at me in confusion, when I tell her that the word is "elephant", and with raised eyebrows asks me; "chang..?" The human brain is a funny beast...

Trust me on this one; as long as you provide a stimulating environment eventually you'll have a hard time answering all their questions...at which point you'll wish they'd just be quiet...

[charlieboz]

I read an article in the economist a couple of years ago that looked into some research done at a University that stated that this was very common with bilingual children. It goes away after a while (as other posters said, they just develop at their own pace). The part I found interesting was that bilingual children are much more likely to develop stutters it stated, something like 10 times more (might have the figures wrong but I remember it being a substantial amount)

[swlondonmum]

He probably DOES understand Thai if he's been brought up in Thailand and hearing the language at home and around him. It just sounds like its taking him a while to be able to respond in Thai (or English if he is only speaking a few words as you say) but it seems to be pretty normal for bilingual kids. The stuff they are absorbing is so amazing and I'm sure the speaking will come in time. It sounds good that he has picked up more since starting school. Does anyone read to him? It took a big effort to get my husband to read Thai stories to our son maybe once every week or two but it does help a lot.

If I am honest it does see, strange that he is speaking more English than Thai if he's been brought up in Thailand - and apologies for the sexist generalisation but lots of kids speak their mum's language better esp if they live in that country - obviously depends on how much time he spends with you, his mum and other Thai or English speakers. And how much times he spends with other kids (Thai or English speakers) - my son would always speak to kids he met way before speaking to adults. And of course his language ability - some people are naturally good at languages and others not.

Can you speak to a teacher about your concerns - they see a wider picture as they see the whole range of language abilities - hopefully they would be aware already if there was a big problem. Or if you have got to know other parents of bilingual kids at the school or elsewhere, maybe chatting with them will help?

Sorry if I didn't help with the feel good thing but hopefully something will help!

[Scully]

My cousins son who was 100% English didn't say a word till he was just over 3, everyone was very comcerned. But one day it just came and learn't in no time. Don't worry it will come. It was if he was taking it all in but not using it.

[KVJ]

My son is 6. He couldn't speak a word of Thai or English until after 3. He understands spoken English but can't speak it. His Thai is not too great either - his pronunciation is poor and he has trouble stringing sentences together. It's a hereditry problem on my father's side. It's not a massive problem but it's caused us a bit of worry. We just have to accept it for what it is and be grateful that he's doing fine in other areas.

[Thakkar]

Every child develops at their own pace and there's probably nothing to worry about, but as fletchsmile says, it's best to have him checked out just in case.

My kids grew up in a trilingual household and could speak one language before age two, the second one soon after (and quite suddenly out of the blue) and the third one before age three. They're in their teens now and have forgotten one of the three languages while gaining proficiency in yet another.

I speak four languages fluently and have a working knowledge of another two. I spoke three languages at an early age, one of which I have now completely forgotten. Two of the languages I'm currently fluent in (including English), I didn't even begin learning till I was eight. At that age, my family had moved to HK and I was thrown into the deep end: the school I attended had their textbooks in English (a language I didn't know, not even the alphabet) and where the classroom teaching was mostly in Cantonese (another language I didn't know).

Which is to say, when it comes to kids and languages, don't worry too much—they can handle whatever you throw at them. Just make sure your son gets plenty of stimulation and is not left alone too much, or at all.

I would advise against letting your kid watch TV on his own. He should always watch with someone who will talk to him about what's going on. I would also suggest reading to him often and leaving the board books lying around all over the house where he can reach them. Two of my favorite children's writers are Sandra Boynton and Nancy Shaw.

Good luck.

BTW: the great English writer, Joseph Conrad didn't learn English till he was about twenty.

T

[Somtamnication]

My son just turned 7.

Wife is Thai, I am UK with American accent (never lived in the UK).

We both speak in English to him, and he picks up on mom's thaiglish. I correct him, often. He gets his Thai lang. skills from her and her family and school. He goes to an esc school, one step lower than ep. No need to pay double for ep.

He mixes both languages, due to listening to his dad screwing up the Thai language. . He reads both languages well and actually has some problems with Thai language learning, and math. So he is normal.

Relax, OP. They grow into it. Son also is learning Chinese.

[Trembly]

I just asked my dad and he reckons I started to speak Thai and Kam-Mueang when I was one or so.

However, whilst I appeared to understand English quite well at around the same time as speaking the other languages, I apparently flat-out refused to converse in English until I was put into an international school aged three and a half.

Edited April 17, 2013 by Trembly

[a99az]

Our girls now 3 and 6 are very good with Thai and doing OK with English. I have started teaching them Spanish and they are having fun with it. We will put them into an English school (in the UK) next September so that they get a real education. But I know we will all miss Thailand.

[Satcommlee]

I have a 2 1/2 year old who is now communicating in both English and Thai, albeit simple things like.. Yu Ni, Where Mammy? Bah, Go etc.. He also knows the complete Alphabet drummed into him by my Android tablet..

But 2 months ago, I was worrying that he is was not communicating at all.

It will happen in the blink of an eye, and like pointed out earlier you'll wish he/she went back to being quiet

There is no hard and fast rules about when he/she should start talking, and absolutely no need to make comparisons or feel your child is behind.. There is no particular order such feats should be accomplished in, whilst he may not be speaking much there is a lot of other development going on. He may simply not NEED to speak yet, which is common.

I didn't start speaking until passed 3 years old, and I think I'm OK

I am actually more concerned about myself, I have been living here for 8 Years and my English is deteriorating!!

Edited April 17, 2013 by Satcommlee

[GooEng]

I just asked my dad and he reckons I started to speak Thai and Kam-Mueang when I was one or so.

However, whilst I appeared to understand English quite well at around the same time as speaking the other languages, I apparently flat-out refused to converse in English until I was put into an international school aged three and a half.

my kids seem to be following the same sort of thing as trembly here.

oldest is just 6 now and started thai at 1-ish, by the time he was three was talking a fair bit of thai but although he understood english he rarely said anything in english. put him into international pre-school when he was 3.5 and i went off to work for 6 weeks and when i came back he was as fluent in english as he was in thai! i was amazed!

the 3 yr old is following the same pattern - getting on in thai, very few words of english but knows what i am saying to him a lot of the time when i speak english to him. looking forward to him getting into international pre-school this august so that i can start having better conversation with him..

[IsaanUSA]

He also knows the complete Alphabet drummed into him by my Android tablet..

Which Android app?

EDIT: removed N. Korea joke due to mods in other threads

Edited April 17, 2013 by IsaanUSA

[Satcommlee]

He also knows the complete Alphabet drummed into him by my Android tablet..

Which Android app?

EDIT: removed N. Korea joke due to mods in other threads

He's got loads of Apps, but generally I put him on Wifi and he browses Youtube, just start off with "ABC songs for children"

[IsaanUSA]

Ahhh, I thought you were talking about a specific Thai alphabet app