N47HAN Posted May 29, 2006 Share Posted May 29, 2006 My Long term "girlfreind" now appears to be pregnant....... Whats expected of the "farang" and how much is this gonna cost me Do i need to do the "thai" wedding and give cash to her family so they have "face".?etc..etc.. thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totster Posted May 29, 2006 Share Posted May 29, 2006 Oh no.... totster Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simmo Posted May 29, 2006 Share Posted May 29, 2006 My Long term "girlfreind" now appears to be pregnant.......Whats expected of the "farang" and how much is this gonna cost me Do i need to do the "thai" wedding and give cash to her family so they have "face".?etc..etc.. thanks Whats with the quotes ?? .. "girlfriend", "farang", "thai", "face?" .. I detect a hint of cynicism Many previous threads about sin-sot (dowry), with opinions ranging from outright scam to valid thai family tradition. I lean to the former Have a search for those threads and read up on it.. Good luck .. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RamdomChances Posted May 29, 2006 Share Posted May 29, 2006 About 2 million should take care of it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
britmaveric Posted May 29, 2006 Share Posted May 29, 2006 Depends on you - since she's preggers obviously you have the upper hand since not having their daughter married with child isn't very good. I'm quite sure you can use this as a negotiating tactic if a dowery is even necessary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
N47HAN Posted May 31, 2006 Author Share Posted May 31, 2006 for the post brit only 2,000,000 eh the family are wanting the tigh style wedding for us... good idea? figures of around 100,000-500,000 are being discussed (in thai on her moby back home). I was thinking 100,000k was ok ? opinions please Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fisherd3 Posted May 31, 2006 Share Posted May 31, 2006 Check out Stickmans website www.stickmanbangkok.com he has done a piece on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rcm Posted May 31, 2006 Share Posted May 31, 2006 hi there, Difficult to say , it also depends on the Background of the Fam... If it is a wealthy Family with old traditions...a high Dowry is not uncommon. But often the Dowry is given back right after the Wedding , other decide to keep it. Make sure you make things clear before ..so you or the Fam has no surprises. Negotiate - this is Thailand ....remember they also expect you to put some Gold for the Bride too....10 Baht or more is'nt uncommon... Good luck, rcm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JimsKnight Posted June 1, 2006 Share Posted June 1, 2006 for the post brit only 2,000,000 eh the family are wanting the tigh style wedding for us... good idea? figures of around 100,000-500,000 are being discussed (in thai on her moby back home). I was thinking 100,000k was ok ? opinions please Thanks 2 million! I'm a brit and unless you have money flying out of your pockets this is waaay too much! Unless she is minor aristocracy forget 2 Million! Well it depends on loads of factors but the sliding scale starts at 40K upwards to about half a million. Heres just a few... Has she been married before (if she has then the dowry is null and void as one has been paid already!) Although the family may try and gloss this over! How many kids does she have already? (The fewer the lower the dowry) Whats her education? (the higher the more baht) How old is she? How pretty? (These two, I hope are self explanatory!) How dark is her skin (whiter the more baht you pay) Whats going to happen to the dowry? Are they (the family) partly/fully investing it in a house for you and your wife or not? If not then consider heavily negotiating the dowry... Downwards! I know of a couple who (they were both thai not falang/thai) cirumvented the sin-sot altogether by arguing the money for the sin-sot they were using to buy the house themselves and did so without a hitch! If they argue against that then be wary! Without delving into what your girlfriends 'calling' was when you first met her, most dudes who marry the Bar girls pay tend to pay a flat rate 100,000. Anymore than that is over the odds IMHO. If she isn't a BG then you'll be in the 5% bracket and can apply the above para into your dowry plan! Hope this helps! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gary A Posted June 1, 2006 Share Posted June 1, 2006 The first thing is to determine if a dowry is proper. If she has been married before or has children I think asking for a dowry is a good indication that you will be considered no more than a walking ATM. My Thai wife was never legally married but she had a Buddhist wedding with a Thai man. She never had any children. Long before we legally married I asked her what to expect concerning a dowry. Her answer was "Up to you and me". She didn't want any dowry for her family and I paid none. She is a country girl, owned her own home and was 36 years old at that time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
N47HAN Posted June 2, 2006 Author Share Posted June 2, 2006 Thanks for the input guys, reckon i'll settle on the 100,000k if i can. p.s just to let u know ..yup bg she is /was? met her in bkk 18mnth ago , single , no kids, 24, even if i do say myself good looking . left bkk to come to phuket with me last august when work transferred me here. Just an after thought... never sent any money back home in the 18mnth weve been together so 100,000k divided by 18 works out at 5,555 a month so dont suppose thats too bad. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KhunMarco Posted June 2, 2006 Share Posted June 2, 2006 Thanks for the input guys,reckon i'll settle on the 100,000k if i can. p.s just to let u know ..yup bg she is /was? met her in bkk 18mnth ago , single , no kids, 24, even if i do say myself good looking . left bkk to come to phuket with me last august when work transferred me here. Just an after thought... never sent any money back home in the 18mnth weve been together so 100,000k divided by 18 works out at 5,555 a month so dont suppose thats too bad. Thanks Paying a dowry to a bg? would a Thai pay that.. hmmmmmm.... don't think so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophon Posted June 2, 2006 Share Posted June 2, 2006 How many kids does she have already? (The fewer the lower the dowry) I'm sure you meant this the other way round. Sophon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrpink Posted June 3, 2006 Share Posted June 3, 2006 How many kids does she have already? (The fewer the lower the dowry) I'm sure you meant this the other way round. Sophon I asked this question to a Thai friend of mine. For a BG 50,000 baht is sufficiant but only if the parents know she was/is a BG. If her parents dont know she was/is then good, all you do is blackmail her into getting her parents to agree 50K, there will be even more loss of face if you dob her in !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon43 Posted June 3, 2006 Share Posted June 3, 2006 Sure it's your baby?? Oops, maybe I should be more tactful Simon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nongwahyay Posted June 3, 2006 Share Posted June 3, 2006 Depends on you - since she's preggers obviously you have the upper hand since not having their daughter married with child isn't very good. I'm quite sure you can use this as a negotiating tactic if a dowery is even necessary. After my Isaan wife and I married (in Berlin)in 1995 (we met through her cousin, who lived in Berlin, I went out to visit her and invited her back to Berlin - we then married) , we went to (near) Udon Thani to visit the family. I was totally uninformed regarding any dowry and when my wife asked what we could give her family, I suggested 30.000 Baht, which was happily accepted. I later realized that it had been stingy of me, but since then we send her parents 20.000 Baht each year at New Year (as well as 5.000 B each year for each of 10 children........nephews and nieces...).....as well as the occasional 50.000 Baht to purchase another head of cattle....... A couple of years later I was asked to pay the dowry for one of her brothers.........the price went up to 80,000 once it was known that the Farang was paying it....................... 2 years later we also payed the dowry of her older, one-time dovorced older brother - but that only came to 30.000 B. Hope this helps.................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdinasia Posted June 5, 2006 Share Posted June 5, 2006 Well ... as the story unfolded .... I don't think I'd give the family anything more than a token gift... your lowball sum would be appropriat... however ... when you have the kid I'd do the right thing and start setting up a monthly deposit for the kid AND the wife should anything happen to you or your relationship in the future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
N47HAN Posted June 9, 2006 Author Share Posted June 9, 2006 Sure it's your baby?? Oops, maybe I should be more tactful Simon lol how sure can one be ? all things being considered think it is but guess well see in a while! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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