Why do Thai's (especially the women) have such a false sense of reality concering money?

[Cypress Hill]

Hello again. My wife has a very good job, I was merely commenting on the fact that such lies are told yet they go without question. Another example was one of her friends told her he owned a noodle stall in Pattaya and he was clearing a million baht per month. Then only a couple of months ago the noodle billionaire called up and begged to borrow 20,000 baht. It could very well be because of her job (she works in media production) and all her friends trying to save face by telling her that beggars on the street earn more than she does. A lot of people, not just Thai's are like crabs in a barrel, all trying to grab you and bring you down to their level.

It also doesn't help that she posts photos of herself while she's shopping in upmarket places. Oh and definitely not all Thais are like this. Some of her friends tell me quite openly how badly they are paid, they aren't after hand outs, they're just keeping it real. I was just angry at the time because she just believes everyone at their word. Apart from that she's brilliant. Oh and she's never worked in a bar. Only a couple of weeks ago she was tired and didn't feel like sex and said "if you want sex I give you money go soi cowboy, because I tired", I thought she was joking, and she added "but you must wear condom". I asked her "wouldn't you be jealous?" She burst out laughing and said "if you run away with bar-girl you be stupid and I know you not stupid". She is without doubt the best woman in Thailand, which equates to the best woman in the world. Dump her? No chance!

[Kaalle]

"Why cant you find an attractive girl who makes her own money? Are you guys that old, fat and sweaty? I will never understand the concept of having a partner, spouse whatever that expects payment and "being taken care of" or some such."

I don't know this poster. It would appear that he has little experience of women the world over. I wish him luck in his hapless search. 555

I have a Thai girlfriend going on 5 years now. She comes from a humble background but put herself through school and now makes decent money. She is with me because she likes me and we split the bills and the money for food etc as much as possible, we do it because she wants to, not because I am strict about it in any way. The important thing is she doesn't want money and she doesn't want me to support her or her family. Most people who meet her describe her as very pretty but more importantly she is just a good person all around. And in my home country we don't have these primitive gender roles where "the man pays for everything" or whatever , women work and have their own money and I have never heard about a girl dreaming about being a housewife or in any way having a man supporting her and throw money at her, its just not part of our culture. If you live with the philosophy that if you have a girlfriend or a wife you have to support her and keep giving her money for this and that I just find that very sad and I posted in this thread to make the point that there are quite a few girls out there, in Thailand or where ever, that don't want money and things in exchange for being with you and living with you. And I am certainly not the best looking and most charismatic guy around so if I can find girls like this i´m sure you can too

[benalibina]

Hello again. My wife has a very good job, I was merely commenting on the fact that such lies are told yet they go without question. Another example was one of her friends told her he owned a noodle stall in Pattaya and he was clearing a million baht per month. Then only a couple of months ago the noodle billionaire called up and begged to borrow 20,000 baht. It could very well be because of her job (she works in media production) and all her friends trying to save face by telling her that beggars on the street earn more than she does. A lot of people, not just Thai's are like crabs in a barrel, all trying to grab you and bring you down to their level.

It also doesn't help that she posts photos of herself while she's shopping in upmarket places. Oh and definitely not all Thais are like this. Some of her friends tell me quite openly how badly they are paid, they aren't after hand outs, they're just keeping it real. I was just angry at the time because she just believes everyone at their word. Apart from that she's brilliant. Oh and she's never worked in a bar. Only a couple of weeks ago she was tired and didn't feel like sex and said "if you want sex I give you money go soi cowboy, because I tired", I thought she was joking, and she added "but you must wear condom". I asked her "wouldn't you be jealous?" She burst out laughing and said "if you run away with bar-girl you be stupid and I know you not stupid". She is without doubt the best woman in Thailand, which equates to the best woman in the world. Dump her? No chance!

Referring to the artist or the song ?

[Jip99]

Thais lie in order to create the effect they desire or evoke the emotion they want in the listener. In their culture, facts are secondary or totally unimportant. This effect is increased by lack of education. Lying or the presentation of false facts or the embellishment of a tale is expected and not to be questioned. Thai listeners would not point out the obvious fictitious parts of the story even though they knew they were not true.

So, in summary, if your wife were a qualified tax accountant, her lies would be much more sophisticated and subtle but they would still be there to create the desired effect. And if you were Thai, you would notice the lies but counter with your own whoppers to create the effect you required rather than annoying nitpicking, which is what it is seen as.

This is probably one of the best explanations I have heard.

[Jip99]

Why cant you find an attractive girl who makes her own money? Are you guys that old, fat and sweaty? I will never understand the concept of having a partner, spouse whatever that expects payment and "being taken care of" or some such.

My gf earns 100-200bht a day, not really a useful amount (working 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week).

The majority of Thai women earn less than 14kbht/month, hardly worth their time getting out of bed.

(compared to our incomes)

I guess if you are a TEFL teacher, then having a gf earning 14kbht a month is worthwhile, but most retired foreigners living in Thailand have well in excess of 70kbht/month income. So we prefer a woman with free time rather than a woman who is always at work.

Ok, I can understand that. But I still question the "quality" of a woman who´s main or only concern is money and extracting it from you.

Quality is not a factor, it is cultural.

Have a read of Briggsy's explanation on page 1.

[Jip99]

Yep, they all lie about how much they and their friends earn (or given by men).

It's a way of trying to extract more money from you.

What she is really saying is,

"all my friends get more money from their man, than I do, so give me more"

There is a very simple answer to this challenge, call her bluff!

"If you think you can find a guy who will provide you with more, I will be sorry to see you leave"

Works every time with my gf, who is in her 30s and too old to find a new guy (that will pay more).

I'm happy with my gf, but reality for her is, I can find a girl in her 20s for not much more money.

You wife/gf is instantly replaceable in Thailand for a younger one, no need to hang on to the old one.

Absolutely, 100%, 24 carat on the money - coupled with Briggsy's post #7 it sums up the monetary jealousy and the measurement/comparison against other people's wealth/earnings.

You rarely hear about some friend/relative being worse off than your partner.

Edited January 4, 2015 by Jip99

[Cypress Hill]

Quality is not a factor, it is cultural.

Have a read of Briggsy's explanation on page 1.

Rubbish

"It's cultural" is the line sexpats roll out to justify paying a Thai woman of low or no class to be with them.

Edited January 4, 2015 by Cypress Hill

[Sirpia]

"Why cant you find an attractive girl who makes her own money? Are you guys that old, fat and sweaty? I will never understand the concept of having a partner, spouse whatever that expects payment and "being taken care of" or some such."

I don't know this poster. It would appear that he has little experience of women the world over. I wish him luck in his hapless search. 555

I have a Thai girlfriend going on 5 years now. She comes from a humble background but put herself through school and now makes decent money. She is with me because she likes me and we split the bills and the money for food etc as much as possible, we do it because she wants to, not because I am strict about it in any way. The important thing is she doesn't want money and she doesn't want me to support her or her family. Most people who meet her describe her as very pretty but more importantly she is just a good person all around. And in my home country we don't have these primitive gender roles where "the man pays for everything" or whatever , women work and have their own money and I have never heard about a girl dreaming about being a housewife or in any way having a man supporting her and throw money at her, its just not part of our culture. If you live with the philosophy that if you have a girlfriend or a wife you have to support her and keep giving her money for this and that I just find that very sad and I posted in this thread to make the point that there are quite a few girls out there, in Thailand or where ever, that don't want money and things in exchange for being with you and living with you. And I am certainly not the best looking and most charismatic guy around so if I can find girls like this i´m sure you can too

Who are you trying to convince?

[redandyellow]

My Thai wife is making us stay in Canada this winter, to save money bro...no LOS for me this high season..

signed,

be careful of blanket policy generalizations

[Lovethaihowever]

Lol..... I wouldn't expect anyone to believe me. If you were all Thai you would though! There's the difference. Give me the Western cynicism any day . Point proved I think.

[Jip99]

Quality is not a factor, it is cultural.

Have a read of Briggsy's explanation on page 1.

Rubbish

"It's cultural" is the line sexpats roll out to justify paying a Thai woman of low or no class to be with them.

You know nothing!

[Jip99]

Quality is not a factor, it is cultural.

Have a read of Briggsy's explanation on page 1.

Rubbish

"It's cultural" is the line sexpats roll out to justify paying a Thai woman of low or no class to be with them.

It's cultural.

You just pay more for a higher class Thai woman.

[Cypress Hill]

Quality is not a factor, it is cultural.

Have a read of Briggsy's explanation on page 1.

Rubbish

"It's cultural" is the line sexpats roll out to justify paying a Thai woman of low or no class to be with them.

You know nothing!

About having to pay a woman to be with me? You're probably right. My woman doesn't need me to pay her an allowance.

I know enough to not have to buy the affections of a woman and if you had a personality, you'd be able to do the same

[benalibina]

Thais lie in order to create the effect they desire or evoke the emotion they want in the listener. In their culture, facts are secondary or totally unimportant. This effect is increased by lack of education. Lying or the presentation of false facts or the embellishment of a tale is expected and not to be questioned. Thai listeners would not point out the obvious fictitious parts of the story even though they knew they were not true.

So, in summary, if your wife were a qualified tax accountant, her lies would be much more sophisticated and subtle but they would still be there to create the desired effect. And if you were Thai, you would notice the lies but counter with your own whoppers to create the effect you required rather than annoying nitpicking, which is what it is seen as.

This is probably one of the best explanations I have heard.

His explanation is not specific to thais but IMO universal. Dont let the truth stand in the way of a good story.

[Cypress Hill]

Quality is not a factor, it is cultural.

Have a read of Briggsy's explanation on page 1.

Rubbish

"It's cultural" is the line sexpats roll out to justify paying a Thai woman of low or no class to be with them.

It's cultural.

You just pay more for a higher class Thai woman.

No.

YOU and guys like you have to pay because you have nothing else a woman would really want.

"It's cultural" makes you feel better about moving a prostitute into your home

[Sirpia]

My woman doesn't need me to pay her an allowance.

We could clear a lot of things up by having this as our signature.

Either having:

My woman doesn't need me to pay her an allowance.

or

My woman needs me to pay her an allowance.

In our signatures would allow us to judge what caliber of Westerner (impressive or not impressive) we are communicating with.

[Jip99]

Quality is not a factor, it is cultural.

Have a read of Briggsy's explanation on page 1.

Rubbish

"It's cultural" is the line sexpats roll out to justify paying a Thai woman of low or no class to be with them.

It's cultural.

You just pay more for a higher class Thai woman.

No.

YOU and guys like you have to pay because you have nothing else a woman would really want.

"It's cultural" makes you feel better about moving a prostitute into your home

Your ignorance and bigotry knows no bounds.

You know nothing of other posters on this forum - me included.

I can only assume that your own sexual frustrations cause you to fire your bullets in all directions.

[Jip99]

Thais lie in order to create the effect they desire or evoke the emotion they want in the listener. In their culture, facts are secondary or totally unimportant. This effect is increased by lack of education. Lying or the presentation of false facts or the embellishment of a tale is expected and not to be questioned. Thai listeners would not point out the obvious fictitious parts of the story even though they knew they were not true.

So, in summary, if your wife were a qualified tax accountant, her lies would be much more sophisticated and subtle but they would still be there to create the desired effect. And if you were Thai, you would notice the lies but counter with your own whoppers to create the effect you required rather than annoying nitpicking, which is what it is seen as.

This is probably one of the best explanations I have heard.

His explanation is not specific to thais but IMO universal. Dont let the truth stand in the way of a good story.

His explanation IS specific to Thais. It was intended as such because this is a Thai forum and the OP specified "..Thais (especially the women).

That is the truth - you can attempt to distort it as much as you wish, but it will not change the facts.

I would not dispute that such characteristics are unique to Thailand/Thai women - however, they are certainly more obvious here and, I repeat, this a Thai forum.

[benalibina]

Thais lie in order to create the effect they desire or evoke the emotion they want in the listener. In their culture, facts are secondary or totally unimportant. This effect is increased by lack of education. Lying or the presentation of false facts or the embellishment of a tale is expected and not to be questioned. Thai listeners would not point out the obvious fictitious parts of the story even though they knew they were not true.

So, in summary, if your wife were a qualified tax accountant, her lies would be much more sophisticated and subtle but they would still be there to create the desired effect. And if you were Thai, you would notice the lies but counter with your own whoppers to create the effect you required rather than annoying nitpicking, which is what it is seen as.

This is probably one of the best explanations I have heard.

His explanation is not specific to thais but IMO universal. Dont let the truth stand in the way of a good story.

His explanation IS specific to Thais. It was intended as such because this is a Thai forum and the OP specified "..Thais (especially the women).

That is the truth - you can attempt to distort it as much as you wish, but it will not change the facts.

I would not dispute that such characteristics are unique to Thailand/Thai women - however, they are certainly more obvious here and, I repeat, this a Thai forum.

Thank you, i know it is a thai forum.

Just reread the comments. You are correct. My apologies. It is indeed more obvious in LOS.

[AYJAYDEE]

I am a widower, after a long happy marriage with two grown children I don't want another wife, I don't want a girlfriend. What I want is sex with no attachments, there for I pay for it, she pretends to like me and call me handsome man and I pretend to believe her and give her money. She doesn't know where I live or my real name. She can't speak any English nor write it. I view her as an object of my desire and she views me as an ATM during our weekly trysts. So what's wrong with objectification of women when that's all you want?

because she wants future security as well and thinks she'll get it from you.

[AYJAYDEE]

I don't see women as objects, but I do understand the feelings for the next one will be just as real & significant.

Why is that so hard for you to understand?

Inexperience with women, is what I am assuming.

You sound like one of those needy, clingy guys, careful, she won't put up with that for long!

just as shallow too

[Thaiberius]

Why cant you find an attractive girl who makes her own money? Are you guys that old, fat and sweaty? I will never understand the concept of having a partner, spouse whatever that expects payment and "being taken care of" or some such.

My gf earns 100-200bht a day, not really a useful amount (working 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week).

The majority of Thai women earn less than 14kbht/month, hardly worth their time getting out of bed.

(compared to our incomes)

I guess if you are a TEFL teacher, then having a gf earning 14kbht a month is worthwhile, but most retired foreigners living in Thailand have well in excess of 70kbht/month income. So we prefer a woman with free time rather than a woman who is always at work.

Ok, I can understand that. But I still question the "quality" of a woman who´s main or only concern is money and extracting it from you.

Isn't that what the vast majority of women strive for? Ask yourself the age old question, "would she still be here if the money ran out?". A clue, the number one reason for divorce is financial issues.

[billphillips]

Reading through the comments resulting from this post I have to assume that some are made by very insecure people and that others are made by individuals that exist in a state of denial. Very few, or the remainder, seem to have a grasp of the situation.

Why do most men come to live in Thailand? Please keep the answer to that question to yourself. The others here already know the answer.

With regard to the aggression and insulting comments; I propose that rather than hiding behind a keyboard the offending writers should make themselves available, in person, for open discussion on the subject.

Being rather new to ThaiVisa I see the aggression and / or abusive comments come from a rather small group of individuals. Frankly I am surprised that they are allowed to continue but then, who am I to make such an observation .....

[AYJAYDEE]

Reading through the comments resulting from this post I have to assume that some are made by very insecure people and that others are made by individuals that exist in a state of denial. Very few, or the remainder, seem to have a grasp of the situation.

Why do most men come to live in Thailand? Please keep the answer to that question to yourself. The others here already know the answer.

With regard to the aggression and insulting comments; I propose that rather than hiding behind a keyboard the offending writers should make themselves available, in person, for open discussion on the subject.

Being rather new to ThaiVisa I see the aggression and / or abusive comments come from a rather small group of individuals. Frankly I am surprised that they are allowed to continue but then, who am I to make such an observation .....

sure got a lot to say for a new guy

[MAJIC]

Because you are a Farang,you were born into money,you never had to work for it,even the trees in your own country,yielded the money fruit. It's all a game ,they only have to say the magic words "have no money" " family very poor" and that absolves responsibilities, and entitles some to be lavished with luxury. Even Thaksin understood the Thai way of thinking,when he said "I will make you all rich in 6 months" they actually believed him,and got PTP Elected again,and the plundering carried on afresh! and the girls will carry on thinking they are entitled to be paid megabucks for menial unskilled work.

Some of the more unscrupulous ones actually think your money should be in their bank account rather than yours,make sure it doesn't happen,or you could be easily be playing role reversal games! that's the real sense of reality! or to put it another way "A fool and his money are soon parted"

Edited January 4, 2015 by MAJIC

[SoiBiker]

Why cant you find an attractive girl who makes her own money? Are you guys that old, fat and sweaty? I will never understand the concept of having a partner, spouse whatever that expects payment and "being taken care of" or some such.

My gf earns 100-200bht a day, not really a useful amount (working 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week).

The majority of Thai women earn less than 14kbht/month, hardly worth their time getting out of bed.

(compared to our incomes)

I guess if you are a TEFL teacher, then having a gf earning 14kbht a month is worthwhile, but most retired foreigners living in Thailand have well in excess of 70kbht/month income. So we prefer a woman with free time rather than a woman who is always at work.

Ok, I can understand that. But I still question the "quality" of a woman who´s main or only concern is money and extracting it from you.

Isn't that what the vast majority of women strive for? Ask yourself the age old question, "would she still be here if the money ran out?". A clue, the number one reason for divorce is financial issues.

The majority of women I know earn their own money.

[AYJAYDEE]

Because you are a Farang,you were born into money,you never had to work for it,even the trees in your own country,yielded the money fruit. It's all a game ,they only have to say the magic words "have no money" " family very poor" and that absolves responsibilities, and entitles some to be lavished with luxury. Even Thaksin understood the Thai way of thinking,when he said "I will make you all rich in 6 months" they actually believed him,and got PTP Elected again,and the plundering carried on afresh! and the girls will carry on thinking they are entitled to be paid megabucks for menial unskilled work.

Some of the more unscrupulous ones actually think your money should be in their bank account rather than yours,make sure it doesn't happen,or you could be easily be playing role reversal games! that's the real sense of reality! or to put it another way "A fool and his money are soon parted"

you have no idea what youre talkin about. my wife worked harder than you ever will, saved and invested and has enough put away to look after herself very well if the need arose.

[Thaiberius]

I know a Thai family in the UK who fill their Facebook pages with pictures of designer handbags, designer colognes, household goods etc etc etc and are up to their eyes in debt. As in Thailand they are superficially nice and pleasant people but scratch the surface and a whole sorry mess is exposed. Up to them.

[SoiBiker]

Most UK families do the same. They're probably just trying to fit in.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Why cant you find an attractive girl who makes her own money? Are you guys that old, fat and sweaty? I will never understand the concept of having a partner, spouse whatever that expects payment and "being taken care of" or some such.

My gf earns 100-200bht a day, not really a useful amount (working 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week).

The majority of Thai women earn less than 14kbht/month, hardly worth their time getting out of bed.

(compared to our incomes)

I guess if you are a TEFL teacher, then having a gf earning 14kbht a month is worthwhile, but most retired foreigners living in Thailand have well in excess of 70kbht/month income. So we prefer a woman with free time rather than a woman who is always at work.

But if she works 12 hours a day, 7 days a week, where's this free time. If you're going to bullshit, at least make sure the numbers add up, mate

Yep, no free time,

Most of every day at her stall, fairly common from what I can see.