Married With An Asian

[bangsaen bob]

Just remember it's only a game. I've been with the same Thai girl for 6 years, married for almost 2.

My best advise, don't piss them off without a good reason.

[Bluecat]

Just remember it's only a game.

Is it?

A game has a winner and a loser,...

Who won in your case?

[elsie]

Is it?

A game has a winner and a loser,...

Exactly, BC. I wouldn't consider it as a game. In a game, one would beat the other as he/she sure wanted to win. Not an ideal concept of marriage to me.

[penzman]

'women are like oysters...same smell and texture and better by the dozen...'

he he he, good ol' Tutsi, please never drop that unique sense of humor of yours!

[Yohan]

You live together, you get married, that's when the problems start.

Your partner is from another city, state or even another country, different language, more problems must be expected. ..........

How do you cope? How do you learn to adjust?

..........

Give us your ideas, experiences, suggestions. Perhaps on my 1000th posting we all can learn something!

Married since 1976, and my mother-in-law is my best friend.....and living next door...

For my wife it is easy to refuse, what is coming from the husband, but it is much more difficult for her to refuse, what is coming from her mother.....

Johann

[Axel]

For my wife it is easy to refuse, what is coming from the husband, but it is much more difficult for her to refuse, what is coming from her mother.....

Johann

This is a good idea, get the mother in law on your side.

Actually, I have had that pleasure. We lived in Hong Kong at that time and the mother came over, which was real hardship for her. Talked a lot (she accepted my mistakes in her language, a lot of mistakes)

After 3 days she told her daughter, "If you make trouble with this guy, you have trouble with me!"

Even today, when I mimick the way she called her daughter in a very authorative voice, my wife looks, perhaps says to friends that I jokingly copy mum, but that visit really made it for me(us)

[sonthaya]

Just treat her like you would a girl from your own country, and you should have no problems,

[tutsiwarrior]

right now, my wife is downstairs with a group of her childhood buddies playing cards one of whom is about 45 years and a scortching beauty...I can't look at her for more than about 10 seconds without drooling with tongue hanging out and etc. Her husband is a young buck thai 15 years her junior that would gladly relieve me of what I have left of reproductive equipment if I was ever to touch his wife. My wife shuffles the cards and smiles sweetly...checks and balances my friends....checks and balances...

[Yohan]

Just treat her like you would a girl from your own country, and you should have no problems,

I do not think so - in my native country divorce rate is near 50 percent, it is always the man who pays, even if he is cheated by the woman -

typical Europe female dominated society....

SHE should have no problems, but you as a man, you are on high risk and the results (his problems) are not depending how you treat the woman, but are pure luck and you cannot do anything against it.....

This is much better anywhere in Asia (and probably true with Latin America and some other spots in this world), and I recommend international marriage to every man from Europe.

Johann

[sonthaya]

Yohan, that's what I mean, you treat them nice and you will have a wonderful relationship, not the same as you get by treating a European woman nice, she will still screw you end the end.

[Axel]

Thanks, a lot of good replies here. I mentioned it b4, I am married for 25 years, this year, although I promised from the beginning I will change my wife once I find a better one...Well to be honest, I do not really search and could not find the better one. (Darling, one day you will understnd that this is a Western compliment)

For the guys who think to get married, read James Mitchener’s novel 'Sayonara’ .

It is put in the Korean war time in the R&R grounds in Western Japan. The US soldiers could date local girls and despite official frowning, there were American-Japanese weddings.

However, you easily can translate this into Thailand 2004. The book has not so good an ending (the movie had )

However, if you put yourself in either of the two main caracters' shoes, convince yourself you can overcome their problems, add a few specific ones for Thailand, (the sick buffalo comes to my mind) you should be a survivor.

[natee1]

Even today, when I mimick the way she called her daughter in a very authorative voice, my wife looks, perhaps says to friends that I jokingly copy mum, but that visit really made it for me(us)

Good one, works for me too. Call her as her mother calls her to get full attention.

Jokingly threaten to phone her mother to defuse arguments.

[Chaamman]

Are you men or mummy's boys?

A sense of Humour and Money, remember you have the gold, you have the gold. Keep everything in your name, house for two, two bedrooms not big enough for her family, Jeeeeeeze.

Remember the ones you come in contact with live in Corrugated iron huts, easily pleased and should be gratefull.

[Boon Mee]

Are you men or mummy's boys?

A sense of Humour and Money, remember you have the gold, you have the gold.  Keep everything in your name, house for two, two bedrooms not big enough for her family, Jeeeeeeze.

Remember the ones you come in contact with live in Corrugated iron huts, easily pleased and should be gratefull.

That's right! Get on up-country and bag a girl from Issan! These city chicks are waaay too sophisticated.

[Duckthai]

A sophiticated Thai Girl (educated) would not waste her time here.

Would still work though, its all about the dosh, you have it, they want it. So keep it yourself.

[sonthaya]

Duckthai, what do you really know about Thai women

[Bad News]

Silly question! What does any man know about any woman.

Nationality and culture have nothing to do with it.

Men's resistance to anything but themselves is the biggest wall.

[sonthaya]

OK, silly question, I'm sorry but sometimes I'm a bit silly

[elsie]

A sophiticated Thai Girl (educated) would not waste her time here.

Would still work though, its all about the dosh, you have it, they want it.  So keep it yourself.

erco darling, erm I mean duckthai.. as I am an educated and (at least a little) sophisticated Thai woman living in Bangkok.. I can tell you that some of us - who are not too tired of shallow foreigners like you - have been around on this forum. They just don't think anyone can educate you. So, only me trying so hard here. Educated and sophisticated or not, judge from my postings (opinions and written English).. and my postings alone.

If you believe it's all about the dosh, better check if your so-called girlfriend really works for the bank as she claimed.

[thaimee]

mutual respect, nuff said.

Thaimee.

[Lourens]

Here's another rule: Don't try to change the Thai way of doing things - too much. I have a Brit neighbour who still thinks he lives there and they have endless problems only because he tries to change the family to become more British. And then he gets p'ed off if they don't want to change. Then he leaves for a couple of days. Now the wife thinks he is having an affair. Then he buys gold and saves the day until next time. I go with the flow and only change those things that have a direct influence on me. Like sometimes cooking my own food. And keeping my environment clean and tidy. Works well for me and has done so for the last five years.

[sonthaya]

Do it their way, and you will be fine

[natee1]

Just treat her like you would a girl from your own country, and you should have no problems,

I do not think so - in my native country divorce rate is near 50 percent, it is always the man who pays, even if he is cheated by the woman -

typical Europe female dominated society....

SHE should have no problems, but you as a man, you are on high risk and the results (his problems) are not depending how you treat the woman, but are pure luck and you cannot do anything against it.....

This is much better anywhere in Asia (and probably true with Latin America and some other spots in this world), and I recommend international marriage to every man from Europe.

Johann

You forgot to mention that women in Austria retire earlier than the men, but the men have to work to pay for it. In interracial marriages this is not so.

[sonthaya]

Natee, we are talking about Thailand, not Austria.

[maerim]

How to make it work?

I think that's a terrible way to talk about ones spouse.

Surely it should be 'How do I make her or him work"

With an attitude like that a marriage is doomed from the start.

[chonabot]

How to make it work?

I think that's a terrible way to talk about ones spouse.

Surely it should be 'How do I make her or him work"

With an attitude like that a marriage is doomed from the start.

Nice one there!

[thaimee]

When all go to bed, one must say ''I love you so much darling, dream good, sleep well, see you in the morning, Kiss-Kiss'' and by the time i've finished saying that i'm a feel as satisfied as she is with my verbal offerings.

It's the old fashioned cogs of romance which unite all couples together, surely?

Thaimee.

[sonthaya]

Thaimee, that sounds just about right.

[Axel]

Surely it should be 'How do I make her or him work"

First he promised to fetch her the stars from the sky, now he not even brings out the garbage for her.

Alterenative, hang the bloody star back to where they belong

[dr_Pat_Pong]

A sophiticated Thai Girl (educated) would not waste her time here.

Would still work though, its all about the dosh, you have it, they want it.  So keep it yourself.

erco darling, erm I mean duckthai.. as I am an educated and (at least a little) sophisticated Thai woman living in Bangkok.. I can tell you that some of us - who are not too tired of shallow foreigners like you - have been around on this forum. They just don't think anyone can educate you. So, only me trying so hard here. Educated and sophisticated or not, judge from my postings (opinions and written English).. and my postings alone.

If you believe it's all about the dosh, better check if your so-called girlfriend really works for the bank as she claimed.

Duckthai is on holidays away from the forum.