You want your girl to be your best friend?

[williamgeorgeallen]

9 minutes ago, villagefarang said:

Almost impossible but not impossible and you only need to find one.  We met when she was 23 and I was 43.  We chose not to have kids and 19 years later we are very happy together, we are still in love and have a great life together.  Most of my wife's closest friends are close to her age and still single.  They are very successful and fun to be around but don't really have the time to take care of some misogynistic bore. 

you have done well and it is possible although after 10 years here, like i said i dont know of any western foreign couples who have stayed together long term unless kids were involved. 

[Thailimpan]

21 hours ago, villagefarang said:

My wife is definitely my best friend and the only person I trust completely.  We have been together for 19 years and share interests, lifestyle and language.  We both speak each other’s language and switch back and forth with ease.  There is a twenty year age difference but that leads to synergies which enrich both our lives.  I can’t imagine a better, more loving relationship than I have with my wife.

 

I couldn't live like most couples I know but fortunately I don't have to.  It has been brought to my attention that despite how bad some relationships look on the surface, they are often the best relationship either person has ever known, so I have stopped judging.  If I find it too painful to watch, I simply limit our interaction and don't get involved.

You are one lucky SOB

[JJGreen]

Almost impossible but not impossible and you only need to find one.  We met when she was 23 and I was 43.  We chose not to have kids and 19 years later we are very happy together, we are still in love and have a great life together.  Most of my wife's closest friends are close to her age and still single.  They are very successful and fun to be around but don't really have the time to take care of some misogynistic bore. 

Where do you guys dream up these weird opinions. It's not even remotely close to impossible.

Even discounting women who don't want to date foreigners it is remarkably easy to meet successful 30+ something women in bkk fitting his criteria.

[villagefarang]

2 minutes ago, JJGreen said:

Where do you guys dream up these weird opinions. It's not even remotely close to impossible.

Even discounting women who don't want to date foreigners it is remarkably easy to meet successful 30+ something women in bkk fitting his criteria.

Why do you feel the need to be insulting and confrontational?

[JJGreen]

Why do you feel the need to be insulting and confrontational?

It is neither IMO. The question remains in my mind about how some of you guys have such weird opinions of Thai women.

Dude, in your last post you called some foreigners misogynistic bores.

Now that is insulting!

[JaseTheBass]

On 25/08/2016 at 9:49 AM, Agent Sumo said:

I don't see how the typical foreigner can realistically call his Thai partner his best friend if he doesn't speak Thai and her English is clunky pidgin. 

 

How can you communicate without sharing a common language?

 

If you speak, read and write Thai, no problem but what percentage of expats do?

 

Unfortunately, a lot of the foreign men who come to live here are incredibly needy and can't bear to be alone or without a confidante. Installing a Thai partner you can barely talk to is among the daftest things you can do here

 

My missus speaks very good English. She was a cashier, you know...

[Agent Sumo]

Just now, JaseTheBass said:

 

My missus speaks very good English. She was a cashier, you know...

 

Of course she was

[Agent Sumo]

1 hour ago, MissAndry said:

 

If you're over 30, or she's over 25 ....... it's likely there will be kids. That's how biology works.

Finding a woman over 30 without children generally means somethings wrong with her (biologically or mentally).

 

Attitudes like this explain why so many foreign men in Thailand are utterly clueless about women and more so why they're here snuffling around poorly-educated women with financial imperatives. They want women who have far fewer options besides partnering with a bland, mundane buffoon who desperately needs to exercise control over at least one aspect of his life

 

The fact is some women simply don't want children early on.

 

If a woman wants to focus on a career or just enjoying her youth, she might reasonably want to wait until later on in life to have kids but the dinosaurs genuinely believe that a woman simply can't go against "instinct" and social expectation and, therefore, if she does, she's some kind of freak.

Men, however, can?????!!!

 

Given all we (allegedly) "know" about Thai men, doesn't it make sense that better-educated Thai women are increasingly becoming more choosy about who they breed with?

 

granted, many of you may not come into contact with them but there are countless childless, educated, professional Thai women around here (Bangkok's CBD) who are in their 30s and, believe me, there's nothing "wrong" with them.

 

Try getting out of the provincial Big C food hall now and again

 

Edited August 26, 2016 by Agent Sumo

[4MyEgo]

10 hours ago, Donutz said:

I asume that by 'seperate finances and having total control over them' you mean the finances of your household seperated from other family? No secrets here and we had full access to eachothers bankaccounts, debitcard (pin code) and so on. She never did anything silly or secret and neither did I. I actually became kind of lazy. My wife would make sure to move some of my and her wage to the savingsaccount on salary day. 

 

She don't have access to my accounts or pins, but she knows where the $'s are and what she and the kids get when I crowk it, why on earth would anyone give anyone access to their life savings, wife/partner/son/daughter/ who ever, as humans, we have emotions, and can turn, including myself, you must have missed my point, "only invest as much as your prepared to lose, not all in !!!!!

 

Love is but a feeling, money in the bank, is money in the bank, it will be there tomorrow morning, it doesn't have emotions, it cannot turn on you, if you can't have your money in a well regulated bank, your up shit creek.

[MissAndry]

59 minutes ago, Agent Sumo said:

If a woman wants to focus on a career or just enjoying her youth, she might reasonably want to wait until later on in life to have kids but the dinosaurs genuinely believe that a woman simply can't go against "instinct" and social expectation and, therefore, if she does, she's some kind of freak.

Men, however, can?????!!!

 

 

No, I consider any human who hasn't reproduced by 30 to be a 'freak'.

 

As for 'I know many women in their 30s no children and not freaks  ........ most are very good at disguising their abnormality to casual acquaintances, marry them and live with them for a while, and it will soon come out. 

 

Edited August 26, 2016 by MissAndry

[villagefarang]

7 minutes ago, MissAndry said:

 

No, I consider any human who hasn't reproduced by 30 to be a 'freak'.

 

As for 'I know many women in their 30s no children and not freaks  ........ most are very good at disguising their abnormality to casual acquaintances, marry them and live with them for a while, and it will soon come out. 

 

That is a very sad and revealing commentary on who you are as a person. 

[Fabricus]

43 minutes ago, MissAndry said:

 

No, I consider any human who hasn't reproduced by 30 to be a 'freak'.

 

As for 'I know many women in their 30s no children and not freaks  ........ most are very good at disguising their abnormality to casual acquaintances, marry them and live with them for a while, and it will soon come out. 

 

 

That's harsh, but it is actually true -- especially here in Thailand.

 

I've known seemingly great Thai girls in their thirties who had never married and were childless. Once I got to know them, I realized why they'd never been married. Very crudely, they were Thai men's rejects and had personality problems.

 

The maternal instinct is incredibly strong. It's what women are put on earth to fulfill. Young women will happily divorce sterile husbands or husbands who don't want to start families (or deadbeat husbands who simply can't "deliver").

 

I spent a long time as a sort of "apologist" for childless thirty-something women. These days I don't bother.

 

MissAndry -- you're right, but your terminology (RE: freaks) is questionable.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Agent Sumo]

39 minutes ago, MissAndry said:

 

No, I consider any human who hasn't reproduced by 30 to be a 'freak'.

 

As for 'I know many women in their 30s no children and not freaks  ........ most are very good at disguising their abnormality to casual acquaintances, marry them and live with them for a while, and it will soon come out. 

 

 

I guess some people don't have much to fall back on as proof of their life's worth so they think they ability to procreate is some sort of achievement

[MissAndry]

3 minutes ago, Fabricus said:

MissAndry -- you're right, but your terminology (RE: freaks) is questionable.

"Freaks' was Agents Sumo's words, which is why i italicized the word.

 

Edited August 26, 2016 by MissAndry

[MissAndry]

2 minutes ago, Agent Sumo said:

 

I guess some people don't have much to fall back on as proof of their life's worth so they think they ability to procreate is some sort of achievement

And your contribution to the advancement of humanity is ????????

[Agent Sumo]

1 minute ago, MissAndry said:

And your contribution to the advancement of humanity is ????????

 

More than the thimble-full of sperm you're so proud of, pal

Edited August 26, 2016 by Agent Sumo

[rogeroc]

6 hours ago, villagefarang said:

Almost impossible but not impossible and you only need to find one.  We met when she was 23 and I was 43.  We chose not to have kids and 19 years later we are very happy together, we are still in love and have a great life together.  Most of my wife's closest friends are close to her age and still single.  They are very successful and fun to be around but don't really have the time to take care of some misogynistic bore. 

 

It would be very unusual for a 23 year old healthy woman, who can have kids not to want them for the next 19 years. 42 is still not too old. I can understand that you at 40 plus may not have wanted kids and i sincerely hope that you have not pressured her into the childless situation that she now finds herself in..

 

What an unnecessary and unpleasant last sentence, i just hope one day her single friends find the perfect man, maybe just like you ! 

[MissAndry]

12 minutes ago, rogeroc said:

 42 is still not too old. 

 

Chances of a woman becoming pregnant naturally at 42 is less than 3%, after 43 is less than 1%.

[JJGreen]

 

It would be very unusual for a 23 year old healthy woman, who can have kids not to want them for the next 19 years. 42 is still not too old. I can understand that you at 40 plus may not have wanted kids and i sincerely hope that you have not pressured her into the childless situation that she now finds herself in..

 

What an unnecessary and unpleasant last sentence, i just hope one day her single friends find the perfect man, maybe just like you ! 

He might not have seen the irony of his last sentence

[villagefarang]

Dudes…I thought you were all proud misogynists from all the derogatory things said about women.

[villagefarang]

50 minutes ago, rogeroc said:

 

It would be very unusual for a 23 year old healthy woman, who can have kids not to want them for the next 19 years. 42 is still not too old. I can understand that you at 40 plus may not have wanted kids and i sincerely hope that you have not pressured her into the childless situation that she now finds herself in..

 

What an unnecessary and unpleasant last sentence, i just hope one day her single friends find the perfect man, maybe just like you ! 

Thank you for your concern and sensitivity.

[JJGreen]

Dudes…I thought you were all proud misogynists from all the derogatory things said about women.[emoji14]

You shouldn't project dude

[villagefarang]

Just now, JJGreen said:

You shouldn't project dude

Just following your lead dude.

[JJGreen]

Just following your lead dude.

Now you mention it...you come across as a bit of a PC follower...but pay closer attention with me dude...rarely do i project

[rogeroc]

1 hour ago, villagefarang said:

Dudes…I thought you were all proud misogynists from all the derogatory things said about women.

 

Now you are trying to justify your unfounded insults.

[villagefarang]

1 hour ago, rogeroc said:

 

Now you are trying to justify your unfounded insults.

Read this thread.

[Testacall]

Bump up itJJ again ...why are you dominating all the pub threads

[mrfaroukh]

If you had bad experience it doesn't mean everyone has

[Testacall]

2 hours ago, JJGreen said:

Now you mention it...you come across as a bit of a PC follower...but pay closer attention with me dude...rarely do i project

Bump up again JJ  Dude

[fordguy61mi]

On August 24, 2016 at 10:58 PM, Scotwight said:

 FhatIf your partner does not speak English and you don't speak Thai isn't that a good way for both to learn English and Thai?  I know my Thai significantly improved when my GF did not speak English.

I'm a newb here so please bear with me. My girlfriend speaks good basic English and I can't speak Thai beyond normal greetIngs. But we can carry on a conversation fine. Sometimes I think her not being fluent in English is an asset because from me there is no "what is THAT supposed to mean?" No innuendo, no sly comments with mean undertones, just basic communication. Of course you sacrifice talking philosophy and the meaning of life, but it's the sarcasm and mean undertones that caused a lot of arguments with past western girlfriends so it's kind of refreshing. Yes it might get old after awhile but hopefully as time goes on my Thai will improve and her English will improve and we'll be having more meaningful banter.