Peppy

If I may just make a few corrections (to what are otherwise good, informative posts):

It is going to rain

Fon ja tok, its going to rain in the future.

Gam lang fon ja tok, right now its just about to rain. // Fon gam lang ja tok

Gam lang fon tok, right now its raining. // Fon gam lang tok

I am running.

Pom gam wing. // pom gam lang wing

In the phrase "fon tok", "fon" is the subject and "tok" is the verb, so "gam lang" and "gam lang ja" go before "tok".

As for "gam" indicating the continuous tense, there's no such thing; it's got to be "gam lang". (Note that the "gam" is pronounced to sound more like "gum", as in chewing gum.)

An alternative to using "gam lang" for the continuous tense is to use "yoo" (อยู่) after the verb, so you could say, "pom wing yoo" for "I'm running". And you can use both "gam lang" and "yoo" together, so you could say, "pom gam lang wing yoo" if you really want to emphasize that that's what you're doing at the present moment.

บัณฑิต - ?? skillful? <- dunno about this one

บัณฑิต means "scholar", and, interestingly, is of the same Indic root as the English word "pundit".

"รถนี่เป็นของเราเองหรือเช่าเขา"

My Thai teacher explained it this way:  "Is this your own vehicle (taxi) or are you leasing another's (vehicle)?"

From thai-language.com

1c.    เขา    khaoR    [a (singular or plural) possessive particle] another's; others'; other people's (+ Noun)

I suppose you could expand on the sentence and say, "รถนี่เป็นของเราเองหรือเป็นเช่าของเขา"

I think you have the general gist of the meaning of the original sentence, but I would change your sentence a little: "รถนี่เป็นของเราเองหรือเช่ารถของเขา" (without "เป็น" before the verb "เช่า").

My understanding of the original, though, was "รถนี่เป็นของเราเองหรือเช่ามาจากเขา" (เช่ารถของเขามา), with "เขา" functioning as the object of "เช่า", rather than as a possessive adjective.

I think it's kind of analogous to "ยืมเขา", where the preposition "from" (จาก) is assumed, and therefore left out.

The reason my pronunciation is crap, I have only recently come to realise thanks to contributions in this forum, appears to be due to VOWEL errors. Tones, I can do, after learning to match the rules I know from reading with the sounds I hear from, well, listening , it becomes easy to use a few examplars across the whole language.  

I think we've touched on this before regarding tones (I learned the tones the same way), but it works just as well for vowels--for example, if you can master the vowel sound in, say, ตา, well, that's the same อา as in all the other words with อา. You've just got to think of a common example for every vowel in Thai, then listen carefully for those words and practice, practice, practice.

I'll try my hand at this... be great if a native speaker could comment on my attempts.

I'd like to pay this bill, please. 

ผมอยากชำระบิลนี้ครับ or assuming it's the bill for the room rental, ผมอยากชำระค่าห้องครับ

The thing is, last time I came here the payment was already overdue, so I just want to make sure I'm able to pay today because I don't know if I'll be able to come back tomorrow.

คือว่า ตอนที่ผมมาครั้งที่แล้ว บิลก็เลยเวลาที่กำหนดไปแล้ว ผมเลยอยากชำระวันนี้ เพราะผมคงกลับมาวันพรุ่งนี้ไม่ได้

No receipt is fine, or you can just print one tomorrow and put it in my mailbox

ถ้าไม่มีใบเสร็จก็ไม่เป็นไร หรือว่าจะใส่กล่องจดหมายผมในวันพรุ่งนี้ก็ได้

Hmm, that the heck is this ? I don't see how the comments above have anything to do with what I posted.

คืออะไรเนี่ย? ไม่เห็นจะเกี่ยวข้องกะโพส์ตผมเลย

There are many errors apart from those (that have already been) highlighted.

นอกจากคำที่ไฮไลท์ไว้แล้ว ยังมีข้อผิดพลาดอีกเยอะ (ครับ)

Todd and Bhoydy, thank you for your kind words regarding my translation.

Regarding the quality of the handwriting, I don't think it's particularly bad. At least, I've seen much worse!

I find it interesting how much a thai character can morph in style from the way it’s written in a typed font into handwritten thai yet still be totally understandable to almost any thai reading it   .  

You could probably say that about any language, though, really. Most of the characters in my English handwriting and printing don't look much like the characters you see in the newspaper, for example, but I doubt you'd have any trouble reading anything I write.

Ok i just read the first letter there. I had to save it on to my computer, flick it round and upsize it to make it readable. I got all the words by the second reading but it was by no means a fluent read. I couldn't work out what วิว was until i realised it was her name. เธอ is written in such a scribble it's difficult to decipher and there were some words where the tone markers were way out of place.

I, too, had to save the files and rotate them (note to OP and anyone else who posts letters like this: post them right side up!). Likewise, I couldn't make out เธอ in the first line, but recognized it by context the second time I saw it. Like I said above, this girl's writing is actually pretty neat, but she does have a very "distinctive" ธ. ธง!

First letter:

To the one that I love who is so far away, will you miss me when we're apart?

Even though we were only together for two weeks, I was so happy to be with you. Whoever you're with and wherever you are, I'll always miss you and love you. We may be far apart and we may not be alike, but I love you. Even if we were only together for a short time, it made me very happy.

If there is a next life, I wish that I can be with you there. Please don't let there be anything that breaks us apart as in this life, don't let there be anything that keeps us far apart.

While you're where you are, please don't forget to look after yourself, since you're someone who doesn't care much about yourself. And don't forget to pick up after yourself too.

I love you forever.

You know, you're the first (Western) man I've ever been with.

I love you, Joey. I'll wait for you for however long it takes, even if you never come back.

(Kiss kiss)

Second letter:

We're as far apart as land and sky, but I've found the person whose heart matches mine and that's why I feel like I feel now. I want you to know what a good person you are. I want to be with you every second. You're the most important person to me. I'll be your baby forever, and love you always no matter how long I have to wait. Someday we'll walk together.

I'll have only you. From today to every day, we'll always have each other. When I have you, it's like I have everything, because you give me true love that I've never felt from anyone before.

Whoever you really are and wherever you're really from, I know I love you and was happy to be close to you, to know that every time I went to sleep I'd see your face when I woke up.

But do you think like me? I don't know. I just know that I love you forever, today or any other day.

I'll never forget you. Kiss kiss.

There's also a good selection of books on Shan/Thai Yai and Kam Muang/Northern Thai at Duangkamol Chiang Mai. Go upstairs and turn right; it's a small shelf right in front of you, before you get to the school textbooks.

As I understand it, Sawatdee was conceived as a counterpart to the English greeting "Hello"-- a no-brainer really, considering it's so much more civilized a greeting than "Have you eaten?" is.

Au contraire mon amie, I find friends inquiring about the specifics of the universal bonding experience of sharing food to be far more civilized then asking about a somewhat abstract existential state of being.

C'est sarcasm, my friend.   

I agree with you.

As Johpa notes, "Have you eaten yet?" (กินข้าวหรือยัง) and "Where are you going?" (ไปไหน) are still very common, perhaps more common even than สวัสดี in many circles. I remember reading somewhere (sorry, I don't remember where) that another common greeting in the past was "Have you bathed yet?" (อาบน้ำหรือยัง).

As I understand it, Sawatdee was conceived as a counterpart to the English greeting "Hello"-- a no-brainer really, considering it's so much more civilized a greeting than "Have you eaten?" is.

With the same mindset, and the support of Field Marshal Pibul Songkram, the good Phraya Upakit Silapasan also coined equivalents to "Good morning" (อรุณสวัสดิ์), "Good afternoon" (ทิวาสวัสดิ์), "Good evening" (สายัณห์สวัสดิ์), and "Good night" (ราตรีสวัสดิ์).

The Thai peasantry being the buffalos that they are, though, these phrases, with the exception of Sawatdee, never really took off, and most people still stick to "Have you eaten yet?" wherever and whenever they can escape the bounds of their state-prescribed hierarchical culture.

I am not sure that กู้นอกระบบ is illegal.

กู้นอกระบบ just means that you borrow money from a private person, not from a bank.

I think when Thais talk about borrowing money from friends, family etc., they just use the word ยืม--literally, "borrow".

I've only ever heard ปล่อยเงินกู้นอกระบบ used in reference to loan sharks.

I seems pretty clear from the context here that กะ  means ก็:

ถ้าเชื่อกะเชื่อ ถ้าไม่กะไม่ มานเปงเรื่องลี้ลับอ่า ต้องใช้พิจรญาณในการเชื่องับ

If you believe it believe it; if you don't then don't. It's a mystery. You've got to use your own judgement when it comes to beliefs.

กะ = ก็

มาน = มัน

เปง = เป็น

อ่า = หว่า

งับ = ครับ

The Chinese Year of the Dragon is known in Thai as ปีมะโรง / bpii ma-rohng, or colloquially as ปีงูใหญ่ / bpii nguu yai (The Year of the Big Snake).

Here's a breakdown of what the Thais call ปีนักษัตร / bpii nak-sat (The Chinese Zodiac):

1. Rat: ปีชวด / bpii chuat Colloquially ปีหนู / bpii nuu (The Year of the Mouse)

2. Ox: ปีฉลู / bpii cha-luu Colloquially ปีวัว / bpii wua (The Year of the Cow)

3. Tiger: ปีขาล / bpii khahn Colloquially ปีเสือ / bpii seua (The Year of the Tiger)

4. Rabbit ปีเถาะ / bpii toeh Colloquially ปีกระต่าย / bpii gra-dtaai (The Year of the Rabbit)

5. Dragon: ปีมะโรง / bpii ma-rohng Colloquially ปีงูใหญ่ / bpii nguu yai (The Year of the Big Snake)

6. Snake: ปีมะเส็ง / bpii ma-seng Colloquially ปีงูเล็ก / bpii nguu lek (The Year of the Small Snake)

7. Horse: ปีมะเมีย / bpii ma-mia Colloquially ปีม้า / bpii mah (The Year of the Horse)

8. Goat: ปีมะแม / bpii ma-mae Colloquially ปีแพะ / bpii paeh (The Year of the Goat)

9. Monkey: ปีวอก / bpii wawk Colloquially ปีลิง / bpii ling (The Year of the Monkey)

10. Rooster: ปีระกา / bpii ra-gah Colloquially ปีไก่ / bpii gai (The Year of the Chicken)

11. Dog: ปีจอ / bpii jaw Colloquially ปีสุนัข / bpii su-nak or ปีหมา / bpii mah (The Year of the Dog)

12. Pig: ปีกุน / bpii goon Colloquially ปีสุกร / bpii su-gorn or ปีหมู / bpii muu (The Year of the Pig)

The official names for the years in Thai are apparently of Hokkien Chinese origin, and are completely different from the Mandarin names. Most Thais are familiar with the official names, but often use the colloquial versions since the official ones have no meaning in Thai other than as the names of the years while the colloquial names reference the animals directly using the Thai word (presumably a translation of the Chinese).

I know my rendering of the Thai in the above list into Roman characters leaves a lot to be desired, not least for lacking any indication as to the tone of each syllable, but hey, if you're serious about saying the words the right way, you've got to learn how to read Thai. And for those that are still working at that, I've made the font a little bigger than usual to make it easier. The transcriptions should just be considered a general guide to help you in your reading of the native script; they don't reflect the actual pronunciation very well at all in most cases.

not yet an adult

Yes, I think you've nailed it--"a lady who is not yet an adult" seems like a perfect definition to me.

ท่าน, according to the pronunciation guide in its entry in So Sethaputra's dictionary, is read as ทั่น. Yes, it is short. (Just compare its sound with ม่าน, for example.)

As for ค่อย, I'm not sure--what would a short ออย sound sound like? To me the vowel sound is the same as that in other words with ออย and a falling tone, like ก้อย.

There is a rule, though, with เอ, where it becomes short in live syllables with a falling tone, as in เล่น and เต้น.

And another common word which is pronounced differently from the spelling is of course น้ำ--น้าม!

As per David's post, yes, "kaek" has two meanings ("guest", and "person of Middle-Eastern/South-Asian origin"), but with the same spelling and pronunciation (homonyms). (Whether that makes it one word or two, I'm not sure. What's 'a word', anyway?)

This is often seized upon in the tired joke whereupon the arrival of visitors, somebody says, "We have guests!" or words to that effect, and some smart alec responds with "No, they're Thai!" (Or farang, Africans, Chinese etc. etc.)

เอ๊าะ is Northern (and maybe Northeastern) Thai for young and sexy, as in สาวเอ๊าะๆ--a fresh-faced, attractive, energetic, and obviously young girl/lady. I think it's also occasionally used and understood in the Central dialect.

It's rather difficult to render the sound into Roman characters that can be read properly by English speakers, since the เอาะ sound doesn't exist in English. It's kind of like a cross between the "ow" of "cow" and the "oe" of "toe", but shorter, sharper, and further back in the mouth.

(BTW, I'm not exactly sure what you mean by "numerous vowel sounds", but if you mean more than one vowel sound in the word, then, no, there's only one sound, but it's written using multiple vowel characters. The เอ (ay) vowel combines with the อา (ah) to make เอา (ao/ow), and the อะ (a/uh) is added to the end to make it a short เอา--เอาะ--which sounds like "ow", but shorter and more explosive.)

<IMG src="http://www.fishpondinfo.com/giantwaterbug.jpg"><IMG src="http://learners.in.th/file/sonson2009/DSCN3385.jpg">

I think the interpretation of หนักเอาเบาสู้ as "willing to take any job one can get" and the variations on that above capture the meaning just fine.

Literally, I think it's something like, "willing to take on hard jobs, and fight for light ones". The idiomatic English translations work better, though; literal translations of idioms rarely do justice to meaning, and sound odd besides.

never, ever confront a drunk Thai over his/her words.  Just keep on truckin.

Brings to mind the Thai proverb อย่าถือคนบ้า อย่าว่าคนเมา (yah teu khon bah yah wah khon mao) "Don't take offense at lunatics, don't scold drunks"--if somebody's nuts, just let them be.

Oh, and I'd take the "Thai" part out of the above quote; confronting  drunks, whatever their nationality, rarely leads to a positive outcome. 

So it means "like"... แบบว่า.... ( คิดถึงอ่ะ )--"like, I miss you".Like, you know, teen-speak. (But us grown-ups can, like, use it too. )

Yes Klons, that's it! Thank you very much.

I think it happens in reverse too. I was speaking to a Thai girl a couple of weeks ago and she was all f*cking this, f*cking that, sh*t, b*llocks, and she wasn't even angry, just speaking normally! Another time I was asked: "Do you want another drink or what?" by an otherwise polite waitress, with the "or what" bit said with a perfect cockney accent.

It's not whether you speak central/northern/etc Thai, but the vocabulary you use. Regardlessof the regional tones/dialects/words, there is always the difference in using politie or not so polite vocabulary. Thai people know this very well.

Bar girls, and the farangs who learn Thai from them, are not usually experts in the subtle differences. And thus, the title of this topic is probably true.

StChris, great anecdote. Tombkk, agree completely.

I don't think learning a language from prostitutes is a recommended way to become fluent in the nuances of polite and civil speech in any language anywhere in the world. I wonder if the folks who think they can pick up Thai in Nana Plaza or on Walking Street have ever thought of studying French with hookers in Parisian crack dens.

Another point that I don't think has been made so far is that without formal study of grammar rules, clear understanding of vocabulary, and frequent error correction, most people will end up learning a version of whatever language they're trying to learn that is rather unintelligible to those unaccustomed to hearing their language mangled. When most bar girls (and other Thais who've learned English in informal environments) move away from fixed English phrases, to tell a story or give an explanation for example, the result is usually a muddle of badly-pronounced words that can barely be called English. The same happens with foreigners who learn their Thai in bars, and it's no wonder that people outside of the tourist/entertainment districts have little tolerance for listening to it.

I think a simple way of putting it is that it emphasises the "now-ness/present-ness" or "here-ness" of a situation, thing, or statement--the subject matter of words and sentences that take นะเนี่ย deal with the here and now. In English we can show this by use of the present tense--simple, continuous, or perfect, like in "Where are you?", "What are you doing?", or "Where have you been?" as well by using a particular tone of voice. Of course, since Thai lacks tenses and tones of voice to show emotion and meaning (at least in the sense of which English has these things), words like นะเนี่ย have to do the job.

As noted above, it's a colloquial pronunciation of นี่, which, when used as an interjection, means something like "here", "now", "look",  "now, look here" etc.

Do you know the names of the people involved? Thai is often very ambiguous about who did what to whom, since it's assumed that the parties involved in communication already know this information. Pronouns are often omitted, and names may be first person, second person, or third person. The name Jik could translate as me, you, or her depending on the context, but I think we can discount it meaning you, since it's clear that Jik is being chased after and it's unlikely that somebody would be chasing themselves.

If the person who sent the message is Jik, then it says, "You spend more time chasing after me than you do going after guys... I'm going home."

If it's from a third party, it says "You spend more time chasing after her (Jik) than you do going after guys... I'm going home."