seonai

I have a frequent amount of bees - of all shapes and sizes - trying to find holes to live in in my home.

Anyone know how to get rid of them??????

Seonai

ps. Because I am on a very small island, even smaller than Phuket, I cannot work out the computer here...

This is khall64au posting.... if anyone cares Advice for Penang hotels please...

Hi all!

Heading to Penang in the morning, hotel recommendations please ... less than 1000 baht per night. No cockroaches or other feral creatures invited.

Cheers!

K

you're on Boo, no probs. Ciao for now babe, xxx

Boo, you are the best. Yup, sorted. Dinner on me, twice, when you come over. Even in blighty dear. You are seriously a COOL chick when ir comes to men. See you somewhere soon. Seonai

Good on you Boo and Sbk, depite the recent hassles which you are both aware of.... I used to get a bit sick of western women thinking that Thai guys are just a bit of meat they can chat up regardless of whether the guy's wife is present. We've worked though that one ages ago and it's cool now. I am not normally so upfront, but once there was a woman so bare facedly staring at my husband in our bar - now closed - that I went up to her and said something like "if you want to come here and chat up local guys fine.... but leave my husband out of it.

This is probably another (old) topic but a lot of western women come here thinking Thai guys are just cute looking easy lays...... bring it on baby...... we know different!

To the girls - I am getting back on form, thanks xx

A very interesting topic indeed, Indo Siam's comments and fears reiterate my own. I worry so much that this is going to escalate into war. Knowing Thailand's reputation for 'curbing' any activity that does not conform to what is the 'norm' here... I wonder what the Thai government will do next? We can't be one sided about this... I am Scottish but I have never fought for a seperate Scotland. And yet many of my counrtymen do.

I just worry so much about lack of education amongst the young and how they could easily be 'indoctrinated' into fighting for a free state. Know what I mean????

And.... Indo Siam, I agree that this 'war' against non Muslims is getting so big that it is absolutely frightening. I think I have said before that even on the small Muslim island where I live, there are about 2,000 males who, at the drop of a hat would probably fight to defend their religion. And that's in an area that is really quiet and normally peaceful. Underneath though, faith, often blind faith, is prevailant.

Scary Stuff.

Seonai

Hi, bit of a long shot but I am looking for and old friend. Her name is Tin Tin, a Burmese Nun aged around 55. Used to stay in houses in Sirirat, Bangkok and also in a temple in Phetburi.

She couldn't return to Burma as her family were close to Aung San.

If anyone has seen her or knows where she is. please post here. Thanks in advance!

Seonai

Nam Kao,

Is that supposed to be a contribution to this post or what?????

Seems you guys have nothing more to say now that balls have been mentioned.

Seonai

Cat got your balls.... oops I mean tongues ?????!!!!!

can't keep up with how fast the posts are coming in on this but in my mind, as a mother, it's simple. it is not only a Thai problem. Punishment is the key. In the UK guys like these get out of jail faster than some people who have stolen or committed fraud.

I am sorry as I am not normally violent, but I say castrate men who commit crimes like these. Cut off their balls. Really...... this might not stop desperate individuals but it might deter and therfore cut down the number of incidences. Only yesterday in Britain a little 11 year old boy was founf strangled in the forest.

If men can't controll their dicks.... cut them off.... or the balls at least. Shock tactics.

Seonai

Okay, for a bit of fun as Boo suggested, here's one.....

A n aquaintance of mine has been married to a Thai for some years and one day recently I mentioned the fact that after S the Thais, Muslim or otherwise, rush to wash in the bathroom. My aquaintance said "oh really....I thought there was something wrong with me all this time..." Instead of languishing in bed afterwards and smoking a cig or whatever, most Thai's in my experience shower after S.

How about you guys out there with Thai wives.... any similar experiences?????

Let's not get into another Muslim debate but in Islam it's par for the course.

Seonai

Can anyone advise on connections between Phuket and Penang - preferably train - for a visa run

Seonai

Can anyone advise on connections between Phuket and Penang - preferably train - for a visa run

Seonai

A friend told me that last month he saw Westerners being arrested at Ranong immigration for not having a work permit for working as volunteers in Khao Lak post tsunami region. Has anyone heard anything about this?

Also, personally I saw that last time I was in Burma at Kawthaung, there was dreadful fighting amongst the guys who try to seel you cigarettes etc. Any other views on this?

Seonai

Thanks Boo, didn't see the post about the muslim thing, it's just my husband's anger not a Muslim thing.

Guys, I don't want you all worrying about me too much out there. Let's just hope that this is an interesting debate and that it may help others ina similar position.

Boo, if we split and whatever on the island, I do not believe that he would make problems for me if I left him to his own devices. It's not that kind od violence. It's explosive stuff, no alcohol, and then needing his space to think. I know it's not right but i don't believe he's a stalker or anything. I don't think he's the sort to lay quiet and then come after me. He just has a total anger management problem.

Seonai

Boo dear and Loong, yes you are right. I don'y want my son to be exposed to tis sort of thing and actually I have largely protected him from seeing anything, like he has never seen the violent side. But yes, I do live in fear that my husband would ever hit my son.

As for the other comment about 'don't most Thai men cheat" - no I don't think they do on the whole. Your wife is a very important part of your family usually and if the family ever found out, at least in my experience here in the south, that the man was cheating..... all ###### would let loose and the family would take the wife out of the situation.

My husband's family are exremely suppportive to me, really. But they are a boat ride away. If I called tomorrow and said there is a big problem, they would come here and talk to him. The Muslim clerics too would talk to him. ut there is a limit to how far you tell people when you ahve a problem. I can talk here cos I know he can't connect to the Net.

Seonai

You are all making me want to cry now, maybe out of knowledge that things are not all well, maybe because you are showing such kindness. I didn't mean to come on the post as a sob story....... thanks guys. If there's any getting out to do it's gonna have to be him as I have my home and mt son in school here. A certain amount of stability, can't give that up right now.

Thanks all again.

Seonai

Hi all you great folks out there, too many to reply to individually. Thanks and double thanks for your valuable comments. It's kind of making me feel really silly now that we're talking about it in such detail but I'll try to answer some of the questions. Firstly, I am an educated writer and editor and can hold my own in the world but have always wanted a sort of cosy family home and a guy that I could chat to etc about anything. So, don't laugh, I guess I just fell into this situation when he asked me to marry him. I'm very sensitive but I also speak up for myself when I feel thwarted I think. I have a long relationship with Thailand and feel somehow part of the culture here.

And so to your questions:

We are both between 35-41 years old.

Yes he has hit me - about six times, one serious.

He hasn't changed much since we were married but I sense that the bar was his way of feeling like the Lord of the Manner - and I did try to change that because I wanted us to have a family life. But there are double messages in there where he has started contacting his parents a lot since he met me and going to the mosque a lot and being more 'family' like - all this done by him, not me. But when he argues he seems to feel I've cramped his style.

He goes out with friends to chat - most are married but would never take their wives out for a drink. Wives stay at home.

I input most financially and I never bring this up. I know it is a BIG one for a man.

He works a little with small wood projects and is most happy when he's working, feels useless otherwise.

I work as a freelance writer.

No I have never had a relationship with anyone near here.

My son came to live with us four months ago and my husband wanted him to come.

No he hasn't lost interest in my 'womanly attributes'

I live in fear because I can't get angry about anything..... you know, have a bad day and bang a door...... if I did that I'd set him off and I'm too scared.

He just seems really angry about something..... once he had a knife at my throat and I was screaming to the neighbours and no one came. I thought I was a gonner. But it sounds so silly now, I know you'll all get mad at me, but I thought/think I love the guy...... he's part of my life.

If it's any consolation, I know of several Farang men who this has happened to with Thai women !!!!!

I genuinely appreciate your comments. It might help someone else out there too one day.

Seonai

Alita (?) try coming to the south for bird watching. We have masses of sea eagles, kites, other sea birds and hornbills.

Seonai

They're both in their late 40's but still enjoy a bit of a party atmosphere

Late 40's and still enjoying themselves..... well, shocking!

Most of the expats living on Phuket are that age and over and thay are what what makes is so special.

Wait until you are 30 something then you'll understand.....

Hi SBK how are you? Thanks for your post. You and I talked a year or so ago about the "island boys" issue.

Well, I'm on an island too. 99.9% Muslim. Very quiet.

Violence - yes there has been several times. But I have to paint a better picture. My husband can be really sweet and loving albeit in HIS way. I have talked to him a lot about compromise and he has compromised a lot too. It's just his temper, I know, as you do, that shouting or being aggressive in my actions doesn't get me anywhere so I really try to be calm, but sometimes, usually when we are in company, something happens and maybe I say something a bit sarcastic to him. Then when we get home he goes nuts. Instead of 'banging' me - his words, he now smashes up stuff in our home. He can't seem to control it. If he feels he's lost face at all, even if it's imagined, he just goes mad.

Recently he's been going to the mosque more often and trying to be more of a family man. But he used to run a bar and be 'guy about town' so to speak..... so when he argues he always brings that up as if his male friends are egging him on. A lot of the men here get married and it's a family thing.... but they secretly resent it and group together to have drinking sessions etc. and get away from their wives and wives families. My husband doesn't drink luckily but he does like to hang out with the mates sometimes. I totally respect that, I don't mind.

The worst thing is, because it's a small place, I like to say "Hi honey, I'm home..... what did you do today...." and he just thinks there is no need to tell me about his day.

What do you think SBK?

Seonai

Thanks to all you guys and girls out there for your support when I most needed it. Really, big thanks. Ice Maiden, you are amazing considering your age !!!!

The world seems like a better place today.......

Seonai

Hi Lovejoy,

Perhaps you could send me a PM if you want to talk about small bars. What did you have in mind? I mean if it's with 'girls' I am not the right person..... if it's just a normal small bar I may be able to help.

Seonai - a fellow Celt

Reading this in the morning, THANKS you guys. It makes me cry to realise that we don't even know each other and yet you can offer such words of wisdom. Thanks Thanks Thanks.

Thanks for being men talking on a woman's area.

Isolated, yes..... small island.

Went to sleep hugging my son last night and he's being a star.

Will check in later tonight.

S