HoudiniXLogic

or should i say my buddy bribed a policeman 60,000 baht at ekkamai for a bunch of pot, and one week later the police officer makes headline news.

is that vague enough? thats all I can make it because its common knowledge in sukhumvit that its the thonglor station that patrols ekkamai bus station.

Stay out of it. Putting your nose deeper into the subject will only cause trouble for yourself. I know for a fact that a lot of Thai's are not for adoption, so them finding "a baby in the street and keeping it" is a happy jokey way of them saying "look, a relative of ours made a mess, and we're forced to take care of it". But from what you've been posting, they would consider you the nosy farang and shun you even more.

That green walkway you guys are talking about? It goes from Wireless rd. to Queen Sirikit park. The only reason I know about it is that its one of the few places that go for a nice lil skate session, with the occasional slum kids watching. But I would say its a good place for a jog, because the only real hazard you have at these places is the occasional dog shit (I see lots of expats and hi-so Thais walking their pure-bred pedigree blah blah dogs on that walkway).

Oh man, those of you with Thai wives should probably do what my dad did. Basically raised me full well knowing how parasitic the Thai side of my family is. I guess my mom only got less parasitic when the old man passed away when she realised that she now had to take care of me, and the fact that I got the better share of the will also. Well she dealt with that pretty fine and didnt flip out, and we had a mutual understanding of each other. She started using money more wisely now that there was a limit to it (even though it was up there in the million baht mark), and I started having to deal with BS. Luckily for my dad, mom, and me, my half brother (from thai moms marriage) is more independent and not lazy, and the only thing my dad payed for him was his tuition to university. Well the grandma's, the uncle, the "distant" relative, those are the leechers.

Grandma just leaches from the whole family. Makes everybody feel bad and forces them to give some money to her. She doesnt use it for anything. The uncle's got a good job, working in a managerial position for a reputable company, except for the fact that him and his son are trying to get into the golf clique, and have spent a good portion on golf equipment....hi-so wannabes. As for the cousin's and distant relatives in the upcountry...everytime I visit there with my mom, I'm always confronted with them. When I was a kid, they'd tease me for being a farangs kid and not being full Thai. Well times have changed, I've grown up with an education, while they're pretending to be fixing motorbikes. So these days If they ask me to pay for something, I'll remind them of what they did and make them apologise in public, and I'll give the ultimate disrespect and pat their head.

It makes you question your ownself when you do this, but it does get fun at times.

Seen it being set up on a few occasions, but its more of a once in a while thing than a regular thing.

OK, here here guys, the Taxi's here refuse everybody if they are too lazy, just the Thai's know how to turn that no into a yes. I've gotten refused, then said some little sob-story to him like "Man, I've been refused by 20 cabs tonight. Please man, I hope you are 'jai boon' enough to understand the hardship of people."

And another time, I'm just walking a line of cabs being refused by all of them. A cab down the line, an older gentleman in his 50's asked me "hey boy where do you need to go? All these cabs are rented, they're going nowhere. I own my car so I dont have to follow the shifts." I got in, told him I needed to go to ramkamhaeng and he took me.

Thing is, you can't get hung up on cabs. You'll be saving time if you just close the door on them before they finish saying "mai pai" and move onto the next one.

Thai people have grown up here for multiple generations with numerous examples in society of people breaking the law(s) and getting away with it. Like Captain Hector Barbossa said [about the Brethren Code], "is more what you call 'guidelines' than actual rules".

My test of a good street food comes with a very simple dish. Khao Muu kratiem prik thai dum (Garlic pork with black pepper on white rice), which is quite an easy dish to make, but easy to mess up also. And plus I can see how the rice is cooked (too damp --- too dry).

But noodles at sukh 38 after a drunk night is also good......

Theres a bunch by ABAC hua mak. Great eats for cheap!

Too many "mai pen rai"s can totally get you ripped off.

One time, the appartment owner of my buddys place had a painter painting the outside wall of a building. Anyways, I see him hovering at the room for a little while painting and I didnt mind him much. He definately heard us speaking English also. My buddy had 5000 baht in cash lying on his dresser. So anyways, we go down to grab a bite and when we come back, the 5000 baht is missing and theres paint marks in the room (footprints and a swap on the balcony door). So anyways, the evidence is there and clear, we go down to the building owner to get this situation settled.

Well I'm also involved because my Thai is fluent and my buddy's Russian, so he didnt need someone not understanding what is going on. I explain the situation to the building owner, but what I get instead was the building owner saying "Nah nah that can't be him, did you misplace the money?" and other forms of denial questions. There were a lot of "mai pen rai's", enough so that phrase didnt make sense anymore. At first I thought he was taking us for stupid farangs and gave him hell for it, and he replies with this "Listen! I'm not taking your friend for a stupid farang or anything. The guy who is doing the painting is my nephew, and he would never steal, he's a good boy."

So at this point I realised that he's either ignorant that his nephew pretends to be an angel in front of him, or that he knows the kid is effed with the law or something. I tell him to bring his nephew in there and he goes to fetch the kid. Basically when the kid comes into the office, he's a bit wide-eyed. But it was nothing compared to the look of horror that overcame his eyes when he learned that I could speak fluent Thai.

So I ask the kid straight up did he come into my buddys room and take the money, because theres paint marks on the floor and he's the only one painting. He admitted that he did go into my buddys room because he had to use the bathroom, but that he didn't take the money. At this point I've had it. I flipped and asked whether he thought that my buddy was a stupid farang or something, to which he was still refusing. I made up some stuff saying that I had an uncle who was a high ranking officer and some other BS, to which point, knowing Thai people, they wouldnt dare question a person's relations (and not ask questions they might not want to know answers to). So after this, they become more compliant. I ask the kid whether he took my friends money, and he still denied. I told him that I would have cops come and get fingerprints front the room and his fingerprints, at which point he takes 5000 baht out of a fold in his pants legs, gave it to my friend and then knelt down asking for me not to call the cops on him. His uncle begged me to not call the cops, and then grabbed a wrench and started wailing on the kid. Thought of intervening, but once more family members got involved, it turned into a real life Thai soap opera.

My buddy moved out of that place the next day. Got his deposit back and everything, considering that he signed a 1 year contract and he only stayed there for 4 and a half months.

Check the international schools. They know what they're doing.

oh sorry i thought you ment the motorbike four twenty.

The bogus fortune teller was a woman who told a grandmother that her son who had been missing for 12 hours was dead. Turns out the son went to visit his father (who was a construction worker) in the next province over. Turns out it was all bogus when the father brought the son home.

Upcountry superstitions blended with reality...

The top four international schools in Bangkok were ISB (International School of Bangkok), RIS (Ruamrudee International School), BPS (Bangkok Pattana School), and NIST (New International School of Thailand). ISB focuses exclusively on the American curriculum while BPS focuses exclusively on the UK curriculum. NIST and RIS have a combination of both. So if you're coming from the UK, its most natural to send your sons to those schools. Many of my friends who are alumnis from that school have gone onto great colleges in Europe and the USA.

Honestly, their purpose is just to make it look to Thai people from Bangkok that the the Pattaya govt is credible enough to hire cops from overseas to deal with tourists.

Have they left a gap for motorbikes to pass through?

You know the locals can and will DIY a motorbike pass anywhere. When I'm in a car they're grievously annoying, but when I'm driving the motorbike and see an illegal motorbike u-turn (and the next legal u-turn is 3 kms away), I usually consider it especially if needed.

You know this is kind of funny. I mean I'm reading your experiences on Songkran. Growing up here (product of a vienam war vet and a thai woman, joke it up, joke it up)

Well for me Songkran has always been more of a kiddy thing to do, and the adults in my family only play songkran as an activity to bond with the younger ones in the family.

But if the tourists like it, then I can't really say much. But being in my mid-20s now, this might be one of my last chances to celebrate Songkran before I fall into the club of people complaining about getting wet on the way to work. Either that, or I'll just attend the foam parties in RCA, and next year I'll do the stockpile method. Less Mary J because I dont want to finish all my food in one day.

The only way to get the police to act is to film the cops in action and blow it up all over Youtube. Get a DSLR and some 70 - 200 lenses, and film them from even further away so they dont know.

Actually, F- that, I know how to pass off under them with a sound recorder.

Thai people actually dont give a xxxx about shirtless farangs. If anything, as long as the farang does not lose their temper, Thai people will tolerate anything about the farang. One thing the Thai's wont appreciate is having a bunch of foreigners telling them to police shirtless foreigners in their own country.

If you're a farang, and you wai, smile, keep a calm demeanour, and dont raise your voice; Thai's can give less of a xxxx if you're wearing a shirt or not. Oh and I've definately seen a bunch of late-teens to early 20s luk kreungs walking in their boxers and a wifebeater around Emporium after a hungover night. Granted their houses are just within a 200 meter walking distance. How do I know? I was one of them on several occasions. The ability to switch between fluent Thai and fluent English rapidly really gets you a pass everywhere.