Guitar God

I've traveled in well over 50 countries and I don't recall any other city where the taxi drivers need to ruminate over whether they want to take you to your destination. It doesn't seem to matter if it's a trip to the airport or a few km down the road they're on in the direction they're already heading. It happens if there is a lot of traffic or the roads are quiet. What's up with Bangkok taxi drivers?

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Lol. The guy probably wishes he was caught mid-snatch.

Phuket panty sniffer caught mid-snatch

Must have clamped him.

Seems they don't know the farang meaning of ''snatch''..........

Most incidents involve young people between the ages of 18 and 35 and whilst not always the case, alcohol often plays a part.

And the other times, they're just drunk.

@ Gsxrnz- You're a scholar and a gentleman, your posts reads like a reading from a fortune teller but I don't mean that in a negative sense, just an impression of the writing style of your reply. I'm not sucking up just because you're saying what I want to hear, it just seemed like an appropriate time to use a phrase I haven't had occasion to use for a while, and I think it fits. I think you've summed it up well, do your research, think rationally, follow your instincts, be aware of the situation and take responsibility for your actions. I can't predict the future but I've been a good judge of character. I think, and hope I have more insight into my relationship than the people warning me to run away.

@FiftyTwo- I have a gent from the UK for an estate agent and I view most of the properties by myself first. I don't doubt that what you suggested happens though, in my case, it's highly improbable.

@ Timtscott- I believe the more information the better. After reading so many stories of relationships gone bad, it never hurts to have a second opinion, even if my gut feeling is to trust her.

@Shancloudy - Thanks for a woman's opinion, I considered posting on the women's forum to get another side of the story. Your point is well taken. She does often pay when we go out and isn't constantly asking me for money. She does buy me gifts from time to time and spent 30% of her salary on a gold Buddah amulet and chain for my birthday (20% if you include what I give her). Without going into detail, I'm 100% sure she is not now nor has she ever been married and there are no other men she is currently romantically, sexually or financially involved in. This I am certain of.

@Water Buffalo- Standard of living is important to me too, it's another thing we have in common. :-).

@Somsrisonphimai- True, the down payment on a house is a form of sinsod. I accept. If we stay together she inherits everything I have anyway so to me it doesn't matter, if we don't, then it's her lovely parting gift. I spoke with my lawyer and gf and we have an arrangement that if we split up, both the house and post martial assets are split 50-50. Two of her sisters may expect financial assistance from time to time but we have a plan for them. Her parents I don't expect to make many demands on me or her. They turned down money her ex bf gave them. If I can help them I will, same as I would the parents of my wife, regardless of their nationality.

@ Rayongchealsea- We're not married yet, we're planning . I have a ex employee from the EU who is marrying a employee from my California office, they met six months ago, that I think is rushing things but hey, sometimes if you meet the right person, you know. My parents married less than a year after they met and were still happily married till death did they part, almost 50 years later.

@ everyone else. I respect and appreciate your inputs, even the pessimistic views and I will take everything under consideration.

We now return to our regular programming...

I actually read that on TV in another forum, and it wasn't even a sex related thread. Even the thread about funny Thinglish expressions had people arguing about bar girls. 0,3% of the population sure give the rest a bad name.

but I'm not a bar hopping, beer-swilling, hoi-licking sex tourist.

And yet you use vulgarities found in establishments that sex tourists frequent...

totster

Thanks for the info, I'll have to look into that. Thailand seems to favor Thais, a lot.

I knew she was helping her sisters, she's always done it so it wasn't anything sneaky. She could have spent it on clothes or something for herself but instead she choose to help her sisters. It's not like she said she spent it on them and then came to me to ask for more money.

Her parents paid for part of the scooter, she paid for the rest, her sister only worked there a couple weeks then moved to take another job. She has one self sufficient sister and two who aren't. I've convinced her to help them help themselves rather than depend on her for handouts and it's been working recently.

I wish we could find a nice place like that for 2m here, for some reason anything under 4m is either old and run down or right in the middle of the city and also old and run down, or in an area that floods every year.

A 30+30 year lease is good enough protection for me, and she's fine with that.

You can't get that either, maximum lease is 30 years.
Only available on cash purchase, home loan bank won't allow.
Lease can't be from your wife, so again you would be forced to buy her a house, for cash, before marriage.

Giving money away to family is another really bad sign (and you say she's doing it secretively).
Imagine how much of your money she will want to give away, when she gets access to it.

PS
What's wrong with a 2M baht house?
View from the front of mine my wifes, near CM, is great (and it was only 1M8).
2013-10-26 10.02.53.jpeg

I don't want to live in a 2m baht house and neither does she, for her to get a mortgage for a place we'd both like I'd need to put down 2m. I've talked to lawyers and banks and that's the best case answer I received.

She did suggest a cheaper house in a development that would require only a small downpayment but I thought we could find something nicer with a real yard and more space between the neighbors but it's more difficult than I expected in the areas we're looking at. Her original option also would have taken 10 months for them to finish before we could move in and now they're all sold out.

According to the advice I've received, no matter if we're married, no matter if I have Thai income, the mortage for a house (other than a condo) has to be in her name only. I have been told that I can buy a car in my name however.

I can understand why she prefers a foreign partner, her best friend was married to a Thai for 6 years they had three children, he beat her and put her in the hospital, then he divorced her. I know both of them personally and I've seen her black eyes and brusies.

He's still living in his house with two kids and she's out on her ass living with her mother with one child. What are the chances of a homeless 30+yo Thai woman with 3 children getting remarried? I can see why my gf wants to avoid a situation like this.

A 30+30 year lease is good enough protection for me, and she's fine with that.

From what I understand, Thai divorce is usually blamed on the woman, even if the man's at fault and there isn't gender equality.

I've lived with girlfriends without being married, in houses I've rented and owned before but nobody in her family has and she doesn't want to be the first. Both of her married sisters, who married Thai men, got married and moved into houses they owned. They didn't live together first and they didn't rent. If you have the means, renting can convey a lack of confidence in the relationship.

I believe her when she says she wants approval of her parents. She goes to great lengths to please them, she'll drive her mom to market at 2 am even though she has to help her mom at 7am and be at work from 8:30 to 5:00. Many times she's chosen working to help her parents over luxurious travel with me. One month she spent all the money I gave her for herself to send her sister to school, and never asked for more. Another month she bought her other sister a scooter so she could commute to her new job, and didn't even mention it until months later.

Not used to being the head of a large government department?

Prefer you to sell the business?

DangerWillRobinson.jpg

Yes I did miss a comma, better than missing a period though...

I'm not sure of your question, or if it is one but she has a fairly cushy desk job and quite a few people who report to her. When she filled in at my/our business she was a manager/ mae ban. She's not used to sweeping up and cleaning at her goverment job. She has her own minions there for that.

She's concerned that it's going to "fall down" due to new competition and difficulty in finding and retaining good employees, cause us stress and I'm going to loose money on it.

For a few weeks we were leaving money on the table because we were turning away business due to being understaffed. Like I said, my intention was for her just to be a silent partner and get a few baht for being on the paperwork but due to unexpected circumstances (that I probably should have expected) it's turned into another part-time job for her. She just sent me a text from work a few minutes ago to ask me to edit some text that she was working on, that I didn't ask her to do and wasn't aware she was doing, for some new promotional material for the business.

I don't even know if marriage will make visa applications easier. In the countries I'm most familiar with, if a foreigner marries a citizen, they're pretty much intitled to live there for as long as they want. In Thailand from what I understand, I could be married, have children, own a condo, have a business, employ Thai workers but if I don't have 400k in the bank and prove I made 60k a month, I'm outta here. I could qualify for a retirement or business visa but I'm not aware of any major advantages of a visa through marriage.

Marriage is is the goal, having children in the reason. I don't want our children to be bastards and don't expect a proper Thai lady to shack up with me.

Being married would also make it easier to spent part of the year together in the other countries I have residence/citizenship in.

I've filled out so many cards and left the visa field blank I forgot to fill it in this time. My fault.

Khun Joe- Thanks for the info. Do I need to go to the airport or are there other locations ( in Ubon or bkk)?

Regarding the mathmatics of sex for money, I follow your calculations but I'm not a bar hopping, beer-swilling, hoi-licking sex tourist. I've had enough strange pussy in my life and I'm ready to settle down, so is she. I'm a serial monogamist, 8 years and almost 20. If she waits any longer to start a family she'll be past the best child bearing age, if I wait any longer I won't be around to see them grow up.

I'm sure many other members here can identify with aspects of my situation, some with bad experiences, a few with positive experiences.

I posted it in this sub forum because my intent is marriage, not entertainment and I wanted to hear others experiences.

One important detail that's missing from the people who are saying she's only interested in me for the money is where they met the women they had negative experiences with. Was it at work, school, church, through a mutual friend, or was she half naked twirling around a pole?

It's difficult to summarize a relationship in a few paragraphs, if I'd included all the minutia I'd probably have bored everyone to sleep and not gotten any replies.

She was a slightly reluctant business partner, I thought she'd appreciate being given a stake in a company for nothing, she's concerned that her being Thai, she'd be on the hook if the business failed and I bailed. I explained her involvement in the business to give background to her character. I said I'd buy a business, hire someone to manage it and we'd both take a salary so the business would justify my work permit and she'd get some spending cash from the business, not from my pocket.

When I bought the business, the manager left to work for the old owner, I wasn't in a a good position to find a replacement and she met a very nice older Thai woman who has been doing a great job running it. A relative she raised recently died in a MC accident and she had to leave for a week, my gf used her vacation days to go there and run the place and when our mae ban left, she even cleaned and did laundry and other shit jobs she wasn't used to being the head of a large government department. She spent many nights calling in favors from friends and doing work herself designing business cards, brochures, advertisments and doing liason with contractors for me, all while she worked full time and helped with her parents farm and her mom's shop. She placed ads online for new employees when a couple more left to go work for the former owner. She did it to help me, not because of any interest in taking over. She'd prefer I'd sell the business and keep the money. I make much more from other sources than this ever will here.

She didn't provide a CV, I spoke with her ex on Facebook, he had nothing bad to say about her, he felt back he <deleted> around on her and said he just wanted to stay in his home country and work and make money while he could (hard construction work) and it wasn't time for him to move to Thailand and start a family.

Her previous bf, also a farang, left her for a bargirl, good luck to him on that. I can hardly fault her for his poor decisions.

Her first bf was Thai, they met in college, he also cheated on her and they broke up. Her second bf turned out to have a wife in another city. She was turned off by Thai men and didn't have much better luck with the next two foreigners. She isn't attracted to Thai men, she likes big stong men and prefers older men because they're more mature (and have more money). I've always attracted younger women and not because of money. I was 37 and had an 18 yo girl in the US pursue me until we got together for a year. We broke up due to lack of common interests and while she was cute, she wasn't that bright and our relationship lacked the intellectual stimulation I desired.

My Thai gf is bright, well educated, we have similar values, interests, like the same music and activities and even though our age difference is slightly more than in the relationship above, she's a mature woman and not a teenager so the age gap is not an issue for me, or for her.

I'm not looking to convince myself, or anyone else, sure I have questions but I've never been involved with a woman in another country with such a foreign culture. You hear horror stories about westerners involved with Thai women who are out only to grab as much money as they can. Sure there are red flags but some have plausible explanations.

Her sisters and some of her friends are fluent in English, I'm not fluent in Thai. If she was just a golddigger or serial farang hunter I think I would have discovered evidence of this by now.

I think some people who grow up poor overvalue the importance of money. I usually have more than enough to live within my means so I never think about it but if you live on a modest government salary and have car payments, support your parents and sisters (as I understand the eldest sister is expected to do ), you are going to place more importance on security for your future in an uncertain world.

I have a valid and unused 3 month B visa in my passport and even though I opened it to the page when I gave it to the immigration officer, he flipped it back a page and stamped a 1 month visa stamp. I had a long flight and didn't think to doublecheck and just noticed it today. I have an appointment with my lawyer on Friday but I'm curious what I should do.

Can I go back to the airport and have them stamp it or do I need to leave and come back and specifically ask them to stamp the correct visa?

Inzman- I have spoken with her ex and money wasn't the reason they split.

She works for the government but helped out with my business when it needed it. Along with my lawyer I control 52% of the business. If we bought a house she would sign a usfruct, if we broke up we'd sell it and both get half.

The business requires someone with a certificate which I do not have and I thought it considerate of her to get one on her own, she has no interest in running the business and would have preferred I not bought it. I went the business route to get a residence permit in my own, for a fraction of the cost, we could have gotten a house and I could have got a residence permit based on marriage.

According to her, if her parents don't accept me (too old, foreign etc. ) then she can't get married. She is very attached to her family and thinks she owes them for her education and upbringing. They are poor farmers who sacrificed a lot to put her through college.

I can see one point, if we got married, she'd outlive me and by the time I'm gone she'd be far past prime age for marriage and probably end up an old maid.

There is zero percent chance she has a Thai husband or boyfriend, I have met and spent a lot if time with all her sisters and friends. Her sisters are also reluctant to bring even their Thai boyfriends to meet their parents because they are concerned their parents would approve and they'll feel pressured to choose between love and their parents approval.

Gsxrnz- yes, I read "Thailand Fever" early and often, I even bought her a copy. Part of the reason I haven't ran away was because of the explanation of the differences in Thai and western culture, especially as it relates to the relationships between Thai children and their parents.

She works for the government but helped out with my business when it needed it. Along with my lawyer I control 52% of the business. If we bought a house she would sign a usfruct, if we broke up we'd sell it and both get half.

The business requires someone with a certificate which I do not have and I thought it considerate of her to get one on her own, she has no interest in running the business and would have preferred I not bought it. I went the business route to get a residence permit in my own, for a fraction of the cost, we could have gotten a house and I could have got a residence permit based on marriage.

According to her, if her parents don't accept me (too old, foreign etc. ) then she can't get married. She is very attached to her family and thinks she owes them for her education and upbringing. They are poor farmers who sacrificed a lot to put her through college.

I can see one point, if we got married, she'd outlive me and by the time I'm gone she'd be far past prime age for marriage and probably end up an old maid.

There is zero percent chance she has a Thai husband or boyfriend, I have met and spent a lot if time with all her sisters and friends.

The opinions were not unexpected. According to her, the reason we can't live in a rental house is because of her parents. She already had two failed relationships with non-Thai men ( one left her and married a bar girl, the other one also cheated in her). Her parents think farangs use their money to string her along in relationships with no future for her. They don't want her dating farangs ( even though her 1st two bf's were Thai and cheated on her too). They equate renting a house to live in to renting their daughter, she (or they) thinks buying a house signifies making a commitment. She suggested a house in a development where only a small downpayment was required and she'd get a mortgage for the rest but the development is sold out. Her parents don't own any vehicles except scooters and got used to using her truck for the past 5 years and she planned to give it to them when it was paid off. I neglected to mention, she's also my Thai business partner, when I bought a business here, without me asking, she took a 150 hour course to get a certificate for the business. She used vacation time to work there for free for a week when our manager needed time off to attend a funeral of her stepson. She's acted as GM of the company the two months before I arrived and every penny is accounted for. Despite her full time job(and MBA), she helps her parents small business for a couple hours before and after work every day. She says once we find a house, then she can convince her parents I'm not just another older farang looking to temporarily bed their daughter only to later leave her. She was devastated for months after her previous bf cheated on her, withdrew from her friends and family and cried daily and says her parents don't want to see her hurt like that again.

Hi,

I've moved to Thailand and plan to marry a Thai woman I've known for about a year. She's got a good job with the goverment, worked there for 6 years, is the eldest daughter, lives with here parents and helps them out and also helps out her younger sisters. She had a farang boyfriend for 3 years but he decided he didn't want to settle down have children and she did so they broke up a few months before we met.

She makes no secret of the fact that she likes money and she expects a better lifestyle than her government salary can provide her. I always pay when we travel or go out and give her money every month. Her ex bf did and I think her sisters and relatives got used to it.

According to her, it's " Thai culture" that we can't marry and live in a rental house so I'll need to put down 3-4m and she will finance the remaining 1-2m, her parents depend on her 6 year old truck to do to the dalat twice a week so I'll also need to buy her and I a car, has to be a new car because you can't trust used cars in Thailand.

I haven't met her parents yet because she brought her ex bf there and when marriage didn't materialize, her parents were turned off of her dating a farang so she wants to be sure that I can provide for her since I'm older than her.

I'm 100% sure she doesn't have any other men in her life but I'm not convinced about the "thai culture" aspects of the relationship and her reluctance for me to meet her parents.

Opinons?

I've seen a Thai man and his farang wife and their children quite often in Central World shopping center and in an around Ubon.

Thai women with farang men are ubiquitous around the larger cities in Thailand, the other way around, not so much.

Asisde from not using the verb "to be" and forgetting tense, my gf says things like:

"I have been to..." Meaning she has done something before. e.g. I have talked to my sister about this, I've eaten lefse.

or

"I have been to tell you" meaning , "I've mentioned this before", or "I've already told you".

" I am bored with (my family, work...)", meaning she's annoyed or fed up with by someone or something.

"Please don't annoy", meaning "please don't be annoyed by (my stupid friend...)

"Not talk about" or "Not to talk about", Let's not talk about it. or "don't bring it up again"

"I try to clam down", I'm trying to calm down".

"Fight talk"- to argue

She's cutie, the baby is cute

"trust in" to belive in, such as believe in ghosts, Buddah etc.

"accept" = agree with

"make activity", have sex.

The rest I can understand but I've neard the phrase "make activity" before. Has anyone else ever heard that, or it that her own neologism?

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I have a Japanese Toto washlet at home, I only use TP to blow my nose.

At public toilets I like the sprayer for cleaning and a bit of TP to dry off.

Could someone please recommend a good insurance company for insuring my 1600cc bike? What is compulsury third party coverage and would I need it? Thanks

That's one of my top reasons for not wanting to be an elephant. I cringe everytime I see someone whack them on top of the head with one of those things.

Sorry for the off-topic post but could I ask why you never got a Thai passport? 14 years sounds like enough time, and you were married to a Thai citizen.

Was it not possible, not practical or were you just not interested?