The Dark Lord

1 hour ago, owl sees all said:

Good posting guys.Thought provoking.

 

Had a big prob' this morning.

 

We had always agreed that when the monks come through the village our daughter (M) would not be subjected to the 'on the knees stuff'. Well!! Right out of the blue this morning M was called over by the misses and told to do as the others were doing. She was not happy doing it and I didn't like it and said so.

 

I want M to embrace love/logic/truth/evidence and if, when she is older (teens), she wants to go religious then I'll accept that. I thought that was what Mrs Owl accepted too.

 

M got on the school bus and then Mrs Owl cut loose. Well it was village war #200. Shouting, pointing, cursing and threatening me with terrible, painful deaths and even more torture once I was brown bread. She said she would send young boys to kill me. I said "send young girls instead. I'll die happy". That made things even worse.

 

I thought there was something amiss first thing at 05-45am when she got up cause she whacked the cat and hissed at me, muttering stuff in Thai.

 

And just like DL's ex; there is always this imaginary 'other woman' behind the curtain.

 

That's it for now guys; until village war #201,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Jeez wise one, how do you turn a nightmare scenario into  a comedy skit? 

 

I mean "send girls instead, I'll die happy" is hardly going to quench the flames of irrationality which are burning bright is it!

 

In salutation to  you wit, perseverance and suffering I will raise a pint pot in your favour  shortly. 

 

Dont dispair my friend, this thread has amongst many other things , given us the chance to vent off ( blow off steam, release our pent up frustrations ) keeping us within reaching distance of sanity. 

 

You do not and will never suffer the slings and arrows of irrational insanity ( sorry William S) alone. 

 

Stay good my friend. 

 

19 minutes ago, champers said:

I have followed this thread with interest, TDL, and recall coming accross you first when you were looking for a home in Pattaya for you and your wife (not too long ago, I think).

Do you think the idea of moving to Pattaya was something your wife found especially troubling? As you are aware, jealously can be a relationship wrecker and the mere thought of moving to Pattaya could have very seriously worried your wife, whether or not your motives were completely honourable. Was she a willing party to the move, or more the case of it her being duty bound ?

It is sad to see such a long relationship break down and it seems your wife has become totally dependant on you financially. Even if a reconciliation is not possible, I do hope you could see it in yourself to make regular payments to help her basically have a life worth living. If you don't you will likely be haunted by regret. You do not come accross as a cold-hearted chap.

Please bear in mind that some on here do revel in others' misfortunes and there is an element of egging on whereby others may live out their fantasies through someone elses actual life experiences. It is a an anonymous forum.

You have a strongly supportive family back in the UK, but there are many in Thailand trapped in the boonies with no refuge or hope back in the homeland.

Take careful and measured steps for now, whatever direction you follow, and good luck & best wishes.

Dear Champers old friend, 

 

A lovely and insightful response with well measured  and thoughtful advice. L et me try to address the points you raise; 

 

It is true we were searching for an alternative place to reside. This was primarily at my request though the wife came around to my way of thinking.

 

She has her sisters family in Patts though neither of us wanted to live in Pattaya. Living close by in say Rayong where we would escape the closed minded clowns that we seemed to encounter up in Khorat hopefully replacing them with better educated Thai and Farang was a mutually agreed plan of action and we were about three weeks away from taking out first trip down there to take a "look see"

 

it was obvious that we Needed to get away from the very toxic son of hers and his scumbag wife ( sorry but no other polite way to describe them) and try to start afresh  together.

 

All was going well until some middle aged uneducated low class woman who reputedly "hires " young men and boys for "servicing" decided that she wanted a shot at the ATM. I was unaware and totally uninterested in this evil womans intentions but the wife was so damned insecure that my one comment to this woman sparked off a totally disproportionate reaction from my wife which included throwing my clothes out of the window, threatening me with a very sharp tree pruning knife, hammering down the bedroom door with a lump hammer and cursing me with some pretty hurtful accusations. 

 

Having lived with such irrational behaviour for several years earlier and finally convincing her to seek treatment for her "hormone induced psychosis" ( menopause) during which I had the police called in with a scurrilous claim of wife abuse ( by her) numerous calls to my office making ridiculous claims  and so on I was reaching the end of my tether. 

 

Having a belief in the sanctity of marriage as well as the " through thick and thin" in the vows, I stood by her through it all. 

 

Putting aside the fear that if she tried the same antics whilst we are in Thailand the result would be likely more than an£80 fine for scurrilous use of the 999 number, My life was starting to evolve as one where I was walking on eggshells all day, not allowed to go out without her, if we did go out I was told not to talk to him or her and increasingly I was becoming both emotionally drained, losing my personality as well as becoming a virtual prisoner in the house. It could be said that I was even virtually becoming a prisoner in our bedroom where my TV and system was set up for UK speaking programmes. 

 

That is not a life. 

 

Since I took up her invitation to leave ( understatement there) and came back to the UK  I can hardly believe how different I had become, how browbeaten, despondent, weak willed and uninterested in life my usually sunny nature had been beaten out of me. 

 

Whilst the blame game game is never a nice one, I can only accept that I could perhaps have been more forceful in shutting down her paranoia earlier but hindsight is 20/20 vision. 

 

Initially I got the begging and pleading to come back with promises of change, moving house etc All of which I answered politely and very carefully so as not to instigate optimism nor despondency. I explained that my departure, which she had "requested" several times, had cost a great deal of money and that money was no longer available to her to squander. I further explained, truthfully once more, how one of our main money contributing tenants was refusing to pay or leave and another tenant who was due to move in a different property had now pulled out was a drop in revenue and an increase in costs ( Council tax at £250 per month etc) and was further going to draw down on available funds. 

 

Reaction was accusations of abandoning her,  not wanting to support her and the old cherry of "I know you are seeing another woman"

 

well for me that was one time too much. I am completely bored having to answer to that paranoid crap day in day out because that is what she sees every day on thai tv. Sorry old girl, I am not like that and have never been either. 

 

I will ultimately send her a stipend every month but she has to sort out her own family ( remember they have always come first whilst we were together but disappear like hell when I am not there to pay the bills)  first. She is the architect of her own future, all I am is the fool who has up to now, financed it. 

 

She has has already effectively sold my Toyota which was bought brand new by me 3 years ago but which she registered in her sons name without telling me ( face thing or mother son thing I neither care nor wonder about any more) so there was the first million gone. She has the BMW for which I am sure she can get another million for unless she has registered that as well in one of her families name The house is not only fully purchased but also has had extensive and expensive renovations done to it making it the nicest on in the Soi. 

 

So why should I continue to finance this orgy of family funding? It is not as if they are children any more. They are not even mine but I have paid more for each of them in a month than the father has for all of them in his life. The daughter who got married to a French guy even gave her sin sod to her father who has never shown any interest in her whilst her mother and I flew her to UK several times ( where she introduced a friend who subsequently robbed our house four times costing us a frightful amount of money) Vietnam holidays and innumerable cash handouts, sorry loans. 

 

Reflecting on it all all I see how utterly stupid I have been,  I must try not to rinse and repeat. 

 

I do agree unreservedly with you excellent post and observations however every every time I get another steam of abuse on Line from her, my guilt trip gets shorter and shorter. 

 

 

In in a way she is helping me dispose of any residual guilt or concern. Should I thank her for it? 

 

You have given me much to ponder and for that you have my thanks. 

 

I am happy that you have "come out" from being a thread lurker ( in the nicest possible interpretation of the expression) to become a thread bro. I believe it was Nixon who referred to the silent majority and I believe there were quite a few who followed but did not post. I hope they got out of this thread what I did. 

 

9 hours ago, George FmplesdaCosteedback said:

Good night DL.

I see your problem.

Sleep well, don't let the conscience bite!

G.

Wise advice Georgio old chum, get a ride in the beast this morning but sadly on the co pilots seat.

1 hour ago, George FmplesdaCosteedback said:

Hi DL, seems we are still going for now.

I just wanted to say something about your dress sense back in the day: Fear not as you were not alone. I had a white Afghan jacket, skin tight T-shirt, cowboy boots and pants that were (the old meaning) hipsters - and long hair of course...

What was I thinking? But I still pulled the ladies!

 

Got behind the wheel of the R8 yet?

G.

 

 

 

Hi Georgio and the thread bros,

 

my apologies for my slackness in posting , the almost two meters of real ales has nothing to do with it at all. Honest!

 

my BiL and I were chatting today and I told him all about the thread bros and how even though none of us knows the other and could probably walk past each other in the street, how much you guys have supported me through a really tough time. I mentioned that you probably got some comfort for your own problems by the very nature of this most amazing, supportive, humorous, friendly and open thread. His response which I admit had me almost welling up like a pussy was that both he and my sis cared so much for me and that their prime concern was to return me to the person I used to be before the abuse really set in with the wife. 

 

How can you answer that? 

 

The land if my fathers however is not the land I left and has many many problems itself not least of which is the price of everything but it feels like home for now and I think I will make it so. 

 

As time goes on though, memories of my life with the wife has started to filter out the bad times and accentuate some of the wonderful times we had together in our 17 years. This utopian thought process however was brought to a crashing halt when I was in receipt of a series of messages accusing me of not wanting to support her and supporting another woman. 

 

Jeez what goes through their heads? 

 

I have told her in complete honesty that the current tenant in our house house is not paying rent and that the tenant who was due to move in in 03rd has now pulled out. As such she has to accept that the flow of funds has been adversely affected and she has to tighten her belt for the time being. 

 

Her response was to go to Phuket with a friend. 

 

It is not my son son who took the brand new Toyota and take a loan out against it, it is not me who has refused to return the "borrowed" money I was begged to loan to a trusted friend. She still has a BM that she could easily get just under Bht 1 mio if she sold it but no, I want my two legged white ATM to cough up. 

 

Still love love her and probably always will but I cannot see any way for me to go back to her like this. As my wise sis says, things will never change .

 

BiL who offers opinions only when asked, dead clever and lovely chap, did say that he wanted me to understand that I needed to talk with people who spoke my language, who would give as good as they got in joshing each other and, apthis is the bit I am only now starting to realise, to get my brain back into action. 

 

It worked so so well that I put my guitar down, opened up my laptop and looked for employment here. There are so many jobs open, I kick myself for being so arrogant back in the day to believe that we could have a great life on the rent from our properties in London. Whilst it is not exactly superstar salaries, there are so many opportunities that I am now knuckling down and really having a go at making some more £££ and in the process, topping  up my NI contributions such that come 66 the people in charge can no longer try to rob me of the significant amount of funds I have already donated to the pension pot.

 

i am looking at making this stay here a permanent but short one. Build up the reserves, widen my asset base to avoid these occasional financial bottlenecks you get by renting property then retire properly and with a good bit more behind me that I can dip into should the occasion demand. 

 

By doung ing that I feel I can ease my conscience and give her sufficient per month to survive on. She gave up a lot to be with me without question, I am honour bound to reciprocate. 

 

I am aware many many will disagree but I am adamant that she should not suffer because of an illness that she cannot control and for which without my help she can never get treated properly. It is just not in my genetic makeup. 

 

I do do not see us back together but by the same token I cannot be so selfish as to destroy her chance of happiness and a reasonable life moving forwards. 

 

Me? I am recovering thanks in no small part to you guys. I have never nor will ever likely come across such a sterling collection of caring kind and witty chaps as you guys have turned out to be. I can never tell you how much you did to save me but if our paths do ever cross and I surely hope they do, I will stand you a good night out for your support. 

 

DL is signing out now for the evening as the second meter of bar displays are crying for my urgent attention but whilst I agree that we may be coming to the natural ending of this thread, a supposition that I dearly hope is utterly wrong, I will be back shortly ( tomorrow at least!) 

 

sleep well my friends, 

 

TDL

 

ps Georgio old chum, sadly that option is never going to happen but to make the mouth water I have a short vid of it if I can load it. Sorry too big but I have some stills

31 minutes ago, George FmplesdaCosteedback said:

Just a last comment on the music before I'm off to to slumber land.

I have loved all the posts guys, but are we not missing the 4 ton Elephant in the room?

There were a few bands we have not even mentioned, Police, Doobie Brothers, 10cc, Caravan anyone remember them? Quite a few more if you think back.

The elephant I am talking about is of course The Eagles, love it or hate it Hotel California has the ultimate last line...

Do I need to remind anyone...... (and most of the other lyrics apply too)

 

It's been a pleasure to converse with you guys.

Take care, I will try to do the same.

Good health and cheers.

G 

 

 

 

Caravan, no I don't think I recall them but what about Camel and their classic, flight of the snow goose? They even belted it out on OGWT an age ago. 

 

Now the Eagles never got me going except of course their classic Hotel California. The bass line is so bloody simple ( except for those with short fingers or Issan Sausages as I refer to my digits) but the lead with the harmonised duo is just one of the best. Good videos on u tube too showing the two long haired dudes whose names escape me right now just licking it up. 

 

All this music talk has has made me break out my black fender strat, something I promised I would never do since I bought it until I could knock out the second solo of Comfortably Numb ( Pulse version) note perfect. Can't do that yet but nailed Time. 

 

Good to see see some other chaps joining us and a warm welcome on behalf of the thread bros to you, if you have the time and patience to read this thread from post 1 to today which is a challenging task, you will be in the groove and fully understand how this thread alone has joined people from all around together by common love of music, sense of humour, suffering and damned bad luck. Each one has his tale to tell, most have done so. Each one has retained his anonymity but has gained something special over these past 752 posts. 

 

I was writing another other of my short posts last night when I lost the internet and fell asleep mid post. That either means I need to get a life ( working on that) or .......

 

 

well i dont don't know what else it means. Am I meandering? 

 

Sorry chaps and goodnight to you wherever you are. 

5 hours ago, barrywhite said:

aren't we  supposed to?

Dunno but I am just loving letting it take me wherever it wants to take me. Old Hippy dude and Andy D nailed it spot on with some out of body type philosophy. 

 

Goid to hear you found your pad of choice Andy D, old hippy dude nailed the music with his last post though I have to declare some worries for Andy D referring to Scottish food...........

 

Rc started this thread and I am delighted to see him climbing back on board to enjoy the trip with his thread bros. Thanks for kicking it off  RC old chap, you may never realise how much help you have given to people who you will likely never meet but who owe you a debt of gratitude anyway. 

 

Then comes Georgio who is faaaaaaar to smart for me. Now what can I use as a password? 

 

You guys old old and new are absolute stars and let no man ( or woman, or transgender or gender fluid or anyone who I have failed to include here) tell you otherwise!

 

 

Nobody mentioned those gifted musicians and wholly underrated band 10cc yet? Much more of a studio band due to the complexity of their music but they did pump out some memorable tunes. 

 

Who did not jiggle around in an embarrassing manner to "rubber bullets"?

 

if truth be known my first ever bass solo was derived from "don't feel the benefit"