fredwiggy

Will she leave you when you get fatter?

Hauptmannuk hit it on the nose to my thinking. Many women stay slim hoping to find a man, then go back to their normal eating ways after he's hooked. It isn't intentional and could be depression. Many people either eat a lot or eat very little if they have depression. People who would just divorce a woman they're supposed to love in sickness and health, till death aren't looking at that woman as their wife but as a sex object and or cook, basically a live in slave. Many men think they look great when in actuality they're fat or out of shape. Women usually have a harder look at their own bodies, thinking they are fat when they're just fine. Asking yourself if you wife is still getting the attention she needs from you is the first thing. Not to say this is in fact the reason she doesn't eat with you and eats more fattening food now, but it's always a possibility. If you're still loving her the way you did at the start, then I would think underlying issues like depression or worries over something. talking about it in a non judgemental way, asking her how she feels about her weight gain and telling her she's still beautiful can go a long way. I'm sure if she was lean for a long time and is now heavier it's really bothering her, but eating is a way of coping that always backfires. Try doing something healthy together, such as daily evening walks. Sharing , meaning real communication, lets her open up and know she's being heard and not judged. Anyone can lose and gain weight. It happens easier as you age, and no one's immune unless you starve yourself. Eating is fun, although eating junk isn't good long term. My own girlfriend gained a few kilos and she talks to me abut everything so that's one of the topics. My clothes are too tight. All I suggest, as she knows I know diet and exercise, is maybe cutting back on the rice, and explained why, meaning sugars burn first in the body before stored body fat. I always tell her she still looks great to me, so leave it in her hands. They know their bodies. Many people don't know about dieting healthy, and if you look at what stores sell, they're pushing sugar like cocaine, knowing people get addicted and buy more. It's a life change always eating healthy, or at least an occasional splurge when you get to your best weight. Asking her how she's feeling is the best start.

The rest of the gang pointed out it's best not to just kill any snake you see, as they eat rats and mice, vermin which are dangerous to have around. I live in the country, and see snakes about once every two weeks, and a lot of them aren't venomous, but since I know American snakes better as far as identification, I leave them alone and hope they go away. The two dogs that consider my house their own help to keep them away. I mostly worry about my daughter in the yard but educate her about how to walk and what to do if she sees a snake. Some snakebites require immediate attention for treatment. Up to 2500 die a year here from snakebite so it's not to be taken casually. Another reason I want to move. I lived in Texas 32 years and only saw a few rattlesnakes in the wild, and they aren't near as dangerous as many here. As far as the geckos, they are really beneficial to have around...............Together with the smaller house lizards, mosquitoes are favorite meals of the geckos. They just extend their tongue quickly and retract the mosquitoes stuck on it. Lay that spray pesticide aside and enjoy the benefits of geckos—a natural pest exterminator.

A lot of it is attitude from the Buddhist culture................Buddhism is not Thailand's official religion, but 93% of the Thai population is Buddhist. Thailand's 2017 constitution mandates that the Thai government assists the Theravada school of Buddhism and guards Buddhism against all forms of desecration.[6] Within Thai Buddhism, women are inherently inferior to men. Women's major role in Thai Buddhism is to provide support for monks (who are always men) and temple activities—this, along with providing offering, is one of the only ways for a woman to earn religious merit. Women's "lower karma" subjects them to a life of suffering from which they should endure with bravery so that they can eventually be reborn as a man in their next lifetime. Women in Thailand who've experienced domestic violence are often given advice from Buddhist monks to be patient and compassionate with their perpetrators as the victims' suffering is a product of bad karma from a past life. .........................Being inferior lets the men think they can do whatever they want. And making merit so they can come back as a man is another fallacy that keeps them in that inferior state, at least to the men. I'm teaching my daughter here, until I will move back home with her, the same things I taught my other 4 girls, that they are equal to men in every way, and never let any man abuse you and get away with it.

It's not only for a better education and better jobs (on average) but I don't want her looked at like many do here, a half farang. I don't like how women here are treated by the men,(not all,most). She is second to no man, and it's hard enough being that in western countries. Here it's how it is. I will never let he drive a scooter here, as most do, under age 15, no license, no helmet. There is no arguing these points. I knew how it was 20 years plus before I came here. Now I see it's worse than I ever thought.

Because it doesn't interest me? I'm moving back home with my daughter as soon as I can. What she learns here isn't going to help her in her life anyway, as the schools are failures with few exceptions, and she has a thousand fold better chance at a rewarding life back in the US than being a victim here, and an underpaid one at that.

No, actually I can read a book in a very short time, and comprehend everything I read, because all my life I've been a reader, daily, on a multitude of subjects interesting to me. I can separate paragraphs but don't bother to, as I feel any adult can comprehend a few hundred words. If they can' they don\t have to read it. I read a lot of what people post here, and some type just like I do, and I can understand what they're saying. Again, if you don't want to read, you don't have to. if you do, read a few sentences at a time so you can get the gist of what I'm saying.

The only shame was brought on her by being treated better than she ever has been (her words and others in her family, Living in the house I built because she didn't contribute anything besides trouble. She had 2 other children with Thais that she left with their families both times. One at age 9 and the second at age 10.She got the second one back just before we went to court to try and make her look like a mom. It didn't matter, the women always get the kids here because of the fact the men don't want them and having a farang fight for his kid isn't normal to the court system here, being far behind westerner courts.She subsequently gave the second child to the first child to live with, showing again to everyone how much she doesn't care for her children. Thai's appreciate any effort a foreigner tries to communicate, knowing they can't speak English so we're in the same boat. I can communicate fine by knowing some and using my phone when I need to. Try, again, not to assume you know me or my life. You, being a narcissist, don't care to get to really know these women anyway. Your words speak loudly. Again, since you're not getting this. I'm an empath, meaning I care for others, and always want to help. I can't help people like you because there isn't a cure for it. There's only loneliness in your old age, as no one can tolerate someone that's only concern is to use others and replace when the feeling gets to you. Everyone has failed relationships. that's how you learn. Some people get along quicker than others because they match better in future plane children, finances and the like. You say you go after married women, Do you not understand this isn't normal behavior? A man doesn't do this. A player isn't a man in any sense of the word. It's a little boy that has low self esteem and has to feed his ego by conquests over women who are either unhappy, or clueless to what a players all about. You know you're own mind. Funny thing is, I know you're thinking also. I've studied your type for over 30 years. And you don't understand that you're burying yourself with every reply. And as an edited reply, I get invited to go places all the time, because my girlfriend works for her local tesaban, and I go to weddings, funerals, sport days etc, and they all appreciate the effort. They know I'm good to my girlfriend, and that's all they need to know to accept a foreigner in their circles. I again get along with everyone but the disturbed.

Please don't correct a typo. You make many, as many others also do here, and I know the difference between ignorance and a mistake. Where did I say I expect anyone to speak English? She knows English, from working in hotels and restaurants and around other farangs in those towns. I'm nowhere near arrogant but you certainly are, thinking you know me when you can't understand just how wrong you have been all along. If you would look at all of my posts, you'll see I'm at the opposite end of the spectrum as far as being illiterate. Where does deaf mute come into this? Have you read what I said she did? Does anyone in their right mind does this? Have you seen she wants to come back to me all the time? Why would this be? You definitely understand her, because you're just like her, and everyone here, and anywhere else in your world sees just what you are. It's you that should stop posting, because by the relies you are given, only those that think just like you agree with you, and that's very sad indeed, especially for the women you'll meet. I do fine with all people I meet, with the exception of the ones who are narcissists and those with depression, who are damaged from childhood. I try and help them, and sometimes they understand and thank me, and sometimes they don't understand themselves enough to know how to escape their own minds. Some people can't be helped because of both these types. depression can be helped, narcissism has no cure.

No, because as I also said, mo one has ever said that before. Women here aren't used to men actually having a conversation with them for more than a few minutes. The men talk with the men, the women talk with the women, with much complaining going on. In the US, women talk with men and groups of both get together are can carry on conversations for hours. If you haven't noticed this, again, you aren't interested in doing anything more with a woman than getting off. And you would understand another narcissists thinking.

Learn the art of comprehending. People like gamma use one sentence at a time, which is wrong, and no one says anything because all can comprehend a sentence at a time. If you can't understand a few hundred words, then don't read it. Easy

I speak very little Thai and she speaks very little English, but when I speak slowly and don't use a lot of words that confuse her, she understands. When she is angry because I'm trying to explain things to her to try and help her, she goes into the silent treatment, because, as a narcissist, she only wants to listen when she is in a good mood, and doesn't want to "work" at the relationship. She rarely looked me in the eyes, only said she was sorry twice, after hitting me because she was mad at her mother, and took her anger out on me because she didn't want to hit her mom. She said I talk to much, the only woman, or person in my life that ever said this to me. This is because she didn't want to hear me, and would have been content living her life with someone that didn't talk and just gave her money and built her a house, did most of the work around it, and in return I got all the sex and good food I wanted. I want more, meaning good communication, because everything else gets old and routine, including sex. But instead of trying to get closer to someone, as I do, you prefer to leave them because you're "bored". That's why I keep saying pick on the bit*hes, because it's their job to hurt others, and like two peas in a pod, you'll get along fine, until one or the other gets bored,and no one cares anyway, so one leaves. My ex here worked in a hotel when I met her. My first ex worked as a barmaid. My second wife was a counselor for drug addicts, and she was addicted to painkillers her doctors put on her, and later died from a heart attack because her body couldn't take anymore abuse.

Most people learn by reading, which, after schooling, is the only real way to keep advancing your knowledge, unless you learn from others who are experienced in a certain subject. Some people never learn, no matter how hard they try, because they haven't got it in them. And of course it is helping, because all the women I was with, with only a few exceptions because of mental illnesses or depression, wanted to stay with me, besides those that ended the relationship mutually because of different future plans. When you treat a woman right, consistently, she will want to have sex with you, unless she is battling demons from childhood. When she isn't being heard, she will withdraw emotionally, and then physically, until you can let her see you understand her, and prove it by talking with her and not to her. This isn't something a narcissist cares enough to know, as their only agenda is to bed as many as possible to notch that bedpost as a teenager does with a frail ego.

You aren't smart enough to understand a woman's needs if you think satisfying them sexually will keep them around. You actually say this then lie about bedding 20 wives of other men, not fully understanding this is the mark of a real scumbag that plays on women's frailty in a relationship that, to her thinking, isn't working. When a woman cheats, she is usually not being heard. Not always, because there are true sluts out there, but usually it's an emotional thing. The player, as you know, has to only "listen " to her, telling her he understand her, and a foolish women can fall for this line of BS., not undersatanding the player wants nothing to do with her but to deposit his filth in her then leave leaving her used and more broken than before, and usually ruining her marriage, and hurting the children. I'm guessing, as a player, you don't care to think much past your teenage angst, and only look to "conquer" yet another clueless woman. If you read between my lines, you will understand that satisfying a woman's needs is exactly where I come from. When you learn a woman from spending time with her, you know her inside and out, figuratively and in reality. Having sex with a line of bimbos thinking you're satisfying them is only fuel to feed your childish ego, where no one again, is impressed, especially here with most of us over 60 and have been there a long time. By the way, my missus has wanted to come back ever since the divorce, but when I lose trust in a woman, it never returns because knowing women as well as I do, I know people don't really change after the age of 30., and if I took her back, she would only repeat her narcissistic ways. I treated her better than anyone ever will, and her own mom told my new girlfriend her daughter made a big mistake, because she, and everyone else in this village and in her family, know I did right by her.

I always do, and will do whatever I have to to understand the other side, as I'm not a narcissist but an empath. You know, someone with a conscience that tries to put myself in the other's shoes. I've read over 65 books on relationships, depression, narcissism and raising children, plus daily on articles on the same. A man only does this when he is trying to understand the other side to have a good relationship with them. But the main point of this, is that it takes two to work on any relationship. One can do all the work, and the other doesn't care enough to give a damn, only trying to stay because of financial needs or the fear of the dark unknown. I only put blame where it belongs, and when an attorney doesn't bother to read on all factors of a child custody case, they are putting you in a hole before you even start. By getting my children back, from the same judge that at first gave them to her, because he admitted his mistake to my new attorney, that explains it to anyone with any sense at all. My first attorney, being court appointed, did only the basic work and didn't care enough to learn all the facts of the case before trial. The second attorney was well paid and did the work because I explained the first attorney's mistake to him, which he spotted very quickly.

She spoke enough English to get by, and I was always trying to teach her, by talking slowly and asking if she understood me. It wasn't anything to do with not understanding but giving the silent treatment, a ploy used by someone who really doesn't care what you're saying but is only with you for what they can get from you. I've tried to explain to you what a narcissist is, and you fill all the blanks for this, but being in denial is never a way to learn about yourself and what it takes to improve.

You seem to not understand you aren't impressing anyone with your teenage banter. No man wants to hear another man's "prowess" with women. Bragging actually shows you really aren't getting any, especially from girls that are smart enough to understand a man who bulls*its them just to get laid. Women that are dumped are never satisfied. Women fake orgasms all the time, and the only way you will ever know is to actually be with them for enough time to tell the difference, as you never will.

Success in what way? Amount of women used. Amount of sex we've had? Having someone you can trust?

I'm neither rambling or posting nonsense. It's nonsense to people who look at women as objects, which you obviously do, from what you've been saying along, not only here but in other posts. I've had a Thai wife, a couple of dates and now with my girlfriend for over 3 years, so I'm thinking that does make me experienced. I'm not experienced in using women,because that's not my nature. I prefer to look at it as respect for the other gender. The kindest way is not to look at women , as you do, as something to get off in then dump. Stay away from good women. They don't deserve to be treated badly and used. Stick to the real bit*hes. Then you can drive each other crazy and it doesn't matter. Nothing has gone over my head. I've told things exactly how they are in this world, and explained to a narcissist what he's doing, yet he hasn't gotten it yet, or most likely, doesn't care either way. I had one wife with three children, who, against the Texas law, took them out of school and moved to her new boyfriends state, illegally without telling the court or the school, which wouldn't have allowed her to because I'm an active parent and they wanted the children to be near me. I spent three years trying to get them back because my first attorney was a court appointed idiot that missed a lot of things, allowing the judge to make a bad mistake and giving them to her, when all he had to do was read the paperwork saying it was wrong what she did by absconding. I got the kids back when I hired a new attorney, who pointed out the judge's mistake to him, and he allowed me to go to her new state and get them back, and they stayed with me until they went out on their own at ages 19 and 20. My ex wife here kidnapped my daughter 4 times, which is a criminal offense in most every other country but not here because they see that fathers don't fight for their children and the women usually get them, with many of them giving them to grandma., all because she didn't understand English enough to know how to communicate with me after minor arguments about child raising, which she still and will never understand. She hid them for 2,1, and 3 months and the last time 1 1/2 years. I had to divorce my wife here to get my daughter back to our village, where we share custody. If you think she isn't a sociopath who's only interest, like many other women, was to hurt me by hiding my daughter from a good dad, then you haven't a clue what a sociopath is, and might just be one from the way you describe women.

Although blunt is true, I wouldn't expect an apology from any narcissist. My ex wife here is one, raised by a narcissist to be one. They love bomb you until they get you hooked, then use you and leave when they get "bored", meaning they are boring people who don't understand what the term initiate means, or couldn't care less. My main point is this. Don't hurt innocent girls who want a real relationship with a man they can count on. Using them turns them into bi*ches that end up hating all men, and that reputation farangs get here just keeps growing. it's the men's fault a lot of the time because of this. If you want sex, fine. Find women who are into that if you spend a little money on them. There's sites just for that here. They are damaged from childhood and look at men as just objects to pay their way awhile, until they get bored and find another. In a perfect world, which this will never be, players should end up with bi*ches and good men should end up with good women. The world's population would drop dramatically in a few decades and everything would improve. Of course this is an evil tainted world, and parenting has gone downhill for decades, with narcissists running rampant, ruining the thinking of both men and women and relationships falter. Player needs to try and find a conscience, although that's like asking God to rid the world of mosquitoes. Good women, and men, don't deserve to be used. Anyone who thinks otherwise is a very disturbed individual that deserves nothing but pain.

You're telling a player who doesn't care either way to grow a pair and tell a girl to leave, instead of him telling her he made a mistake, all he wants from women is sex for a little while then on to the next victim. Sorry I took you for granted, this is what I am and I'll never change. The more I see these types of replies the more I think many here are still adolescents in an older body. It's no wonder women are so pissed off the last few decades. I'm assuming these people don't realize there are quite a few women that post here, and that tell their girlfriends how many farangs think that are living here.

It was only meant to be the point that many have had children by the time they are 20. I know it doesn't mean all. The birth rate has dropped a bit in recent years but the amount of single parent families here has increased, meaning girls with children. The US has more but here the fathers aren't held accountable for the children they make, leaving the mother to fend for herself and many times (35%+) leaving the children behind with grandparents, the highest rate worldwide. Sexual permissiveness here is very high, with the legal age of 15 being ridiculous, especially seeing those dads aren't going to stick around most of the time, and not pay for the child's future. It's very sad for these mothers because some of them care for their children and stick around, working locally so they can take care of the kids. This is another reason why they look at us, thinking we will be responsible for their kids if we stay with them.

People heal from relationships but they never forget how they were treated, and many bring that anger into the following relationships, sometimes ruining what could have been the best thing in their lives. All because some player looked at them as objects to use. There's no way of knowing how a woman feels unless you talk to her and she trusts you enough to let you in. Thai woman are no different than all other women in the world as far as their needs and desires, how they react to being used, how long it takes to heal from a bad relationship, how they lose or regain trust, and how they treat the men who follow a bad one.

I wasn't referring to the women.

Wives tire of husbands that treat them like slaves or sex objects. You treat a normal woman right, meaning one that's not a paid for employee or well damaged by the men in her life, especially her father, and they'll reciprocate. So many men say this but when you ask the wives they'll tell you different. No woman won't respond well to good treatment. Even the ones that haven't been treated well will appreciate the difference. People don't change much at all after 30, especially their character. If your wife nags you all the time, maybe you haven't been listening the right way, and doing things that don\t upset her intentionally. But wait, you have no experience being a husband so you cannot put your two cents in. Going by what some of your friends have said, and if they hang around with a person that looks at women like you do, I'd be suspicious of their thinking anyway, means nothing if they also treat their women wrong. Trust is given, and you have to give it because if you don't, they'll always be thinking you don't trust them, and that's trouble. Goes both ways of course. Again, wives don't change their minds if you're being consistently good with them, treat them as partners instead of house cleaners and cooks, help around the house, romance them by taking them on dates all the time, not just the first couple of years. Finding a good woman is the hardest thing a man can do, and sometimes it takes along time. Treating women badly makes them turn against and not trust any man.