Momo8

People who spank blow up monkeys definitely belong in Bedlam.Alas I can't open the blow up monkey website which is just as well.

I'm not allowed to post my personal statement...because...just like Totster says above...."I know this is Bedlam, but there is still a limit."

But I'll give you some hints....It's a looong statement...it is not an outline but is well fleshed out....it is a strong statement...it might seem limp at first but it won't take long for you to get it straightened out....my statement can be spoken meaning that it is delightful when mouthed...and that usually only takes a few minutes to accomplish its goals.....but....sorry....I'm not allowed to post it here.

Chownah

We'll let your wife decypher that one....what's the er conclusion to this statement?

Cool isn't it?

Yes naughty pupils should be lashed.

Alas have to agree.The age gap is way toooooooooooo big.Generationa gap.

Changed my contacts and mascara is this better?

Obviously we don't see eye to eye then

Maybe she needs a sugar daddy then

You need your bottom spanked or a tennis ball in your mouth,can't decide.

Someone send ZPete a message thread is down in the doledrums again.It should be snappy like Old Croc!

'Just to say that the first time I was starting to see what, for me, was an older guy, if I look back and if I am honest, I was a bit overwhelmed... (I was 26-27 then as had been in a long term relationship prior to this for MANY years!). The fact that he was a MAN and not a younger guy more around my age made me think that he was gonna expect me to get straight down to it. Rather than take it slower, like guys more my age.'

26-27 is not a man? Lol my husband is much younger than me but if the chemistry isn't there it's not there.Chinese people especially the younger generation don't have any qualms about chemistry.(In response to the OP saying she's half Chinese).

If the heavens don't weep,the angels sing and the lightning bolt doesn't strike on BOTH sides,well then.......Better just ask her straight out OP and don't waste your time on forums or real life speculating about it.

He's just being a dirty little tiger.Behave yourself or I'll put the mask on too ala SBK style.

Yes,the ones that can kick arse. Thanks again.A smile is worth a thousand words.

I don't have a problem with it.All my past boyfriends before I met my husband sniffed my ears,licked me,pulled up my panties up and gave me golden showers before farting.Then they tried to kiss me.

Lol with advice like that you can't go wrong Intumult.

Back on track,well only you know what's going on.Why not ask her straight out 'Can I have a kiss?' Or tell her you want to be her bf then see what hapens.Assuming of course you can make her understand what you are saying.But really,will you really be satisfied with someone who can't hold a decent discussion with you about anything?

So what if she looks gorgeous.Many girls are gorgeous.Take the blinders and beer googles off and assess the situation from a realistic point of view.If you have serious relationship plans with this woman then play along.If you just want to shag her well she's not into you or playing games.Forget it and move on.

OK boys,I'm amused.Really,truly,honestly.You guys are too funny and thanks.Big hugs and kisses.

Mercy no more sick jokes.

I'm getting the whip and chair out now so please go back to your cages.I'll rattle when I need you to come out.

And when you two are alone, in a confined space, like a taxi...or even better yet, an elevator, just rip a big loud fart too. Sexy!

hence the dutch oven. (letting one go under the sheets, then pulling them over her head)

Oh, that's the "dutch oven". I thought it was a metaphor for...I guess..."laying pipe". How about the "golden shower"? All girls love the "golden shower".

Are you obsessed with bodily functions Sub? Gross.

Run Forrest run.

She's playing games.Seems a bit odd to me.See how it pans out and hope it works out but many things going against this one.Communication barrier being the number one.

Being Thai/Chinese is no explanation,you are being a gentleman and you can't figure her out because you can't communicate.Maybe she'll hit you to pay for English lessons next.Dunno,for me how can anyone date somone who can't speak the lingo? The basis of any good relationship is communication,the physical passion dies eventually,then what? Hanging around a beautiful doll for what?

She's doing everything else trying for intimacy except the kissy thing.....so if she won't say why or can't say what's next?I wouldn't waste my time.

I concur with Momo. I also raise, and propose the following new rule: "If you have to ask on an internet forum, the relationship probably isn't going to work out."

All kidding aside, the circumstances sound weird to me. 6 weeks? Long enough for a kiss in my book, and even according to conservative Thai standards. Assuming that your teeth are in your mouth, and there aren't any other hygiene issues, a kiss is not asking for that much. If she was really into you, I would think it would have happened by now.

Sorry to bring this up, but I am reminded of something. Prostitution is legal in Nevada, but there is a long standing rule that prostitutes will do anything except this. What is it? Kissing. It is too intimate. And in this case, if she won't kiss you it seems that she just doesn't want to get intimate with you, or maybe isn't attracted to you. You mention that she is 25, but you didn't mention your own age. Maybe she isn't attracted to you but is stringing you along for some other purpose, be it monetarily or out of the novelty of having a farang boyfriend. I am not inside her head, so anything I say is speculation, mind you. But not a peck on the cheek after 6 weeks? That is weird. It is also weird to be holding hands in front of her parents. My cousin is married, and lives with her parents in the same house (with her sister). I can't say I have seen her holding hands in front of her parents--and that is her husband.

Something is up, I don't know what. But "Run, Forrest, Run."

UNLESS....she's got you picked out as potential husband material OP.

She wants to be perceived in front of her family that you are her boyfriend and she's not going any further because she wants you to think she's a 'good girl'.Just giving you a taste/tease but that's all.Then again Sub has got it right too.Prostitutes don't kiss their customers because it's too intimate.Heck I've watched 'Pretty Woman' too.

Soooooooooo from my point of view I would be extremely wary about entering into a relationship (if that's what you plan) with somone who can't understand you.All kinds of problems and misunderstandings will arise.Don't put youself through it,stay friends but don't let her touch you and be so familiar with you.

Lol I hope she hasn't said 'Me love you a long time' to you yet.Also if she has led her family to believe you are her bf be careful she doesn't set you up for something.You never know.

As to her being half Chinese so what? Hope you are not the same guy who posted 'Thunderstruck by Beauty' and this is the next stage.Saying this is all a bit odd is an understatement.

Run Forrest run.

She's playing games.Seems a bit odd to me.See how it pans out and hope it works out but many things going against this one.Communication barrier being the number one.

Being Thai/Chinese is no explanation,you are being a gentleman and you can't figure her out because you can't communicate.Maybe she'll hit you to pay for English lessons next.Dunno,for me how can anyone date somone who can't speak the lingo? The basis of any good relationship is communication,the physical passion dies eventually,then what? Hanging around a beautiful doll for what?

She's doing everything else trying for intimacy except the kissy thing.....so if she won't say why or can't say what's next?I wouldn't waste my time.

So combine the threads JD some goodies on the old one and I remember the OP's original post as one I've seen on the other thread.

A man with 3 eyes,no arms and one leg was hitchiking.

A motorist stopped taking pity on him.

'Eye,eye,eye,you look 'armless,hop in' sorry the eye stays.Fork off.

Don't give up your day job Clownah ooops I mean Chownah.

... so now I'll tell you why I sometimes put on the troll hat....I do it so that the moderators will feel needed and that they are doing something worthwhile.....and I especially do it if there is a new moderator around so that during the arguement which inevitably goes on when this happens I can give them some good advise on how to run the forum. I think its a pretty good strategy and it seems to work really well....the mods mostly mind pretty well after I clue them in....but sometimes it takes them suspending me a couple of times before I can get enough words in edgewise to straighten them out.

My nomination for the following award:

I think Chownah is angling for a job here......a troll moderator,now that should stir things up.

Right on Sugha.

So what's the male equivalent then?Bastard has too many letters.

Momo8,

I've got an idea....maybe not a good one but it is an idea never the less. How about if I start an "Abuse Momo8" thread....then we could all heap abuse on you and then you would get enured to it...and besides....it SOUNDS LIKE ALOT OF FUN.............HAHAHHAHAHAHAH

Semi Sincerely,

Chownah

Come on then I dare you.Tell me,'Do you feel...lucky?' Bring in on.

You may remember the old Jewish Catskill comics of Vaudeville days, viz., Shecky Green, Red Buttons, Totie Fields, Milton Berle, Henny Youngman, and others. Don't you miss their humor? Not one single swear word in their comedy. Here are some examples:

A car hit an elderly Jewish man.

The paramedic says, 'Are you comfortable?'

The man says, 'I make a good living.'

No,no this is an Irish joke.

A car hits an elderly Irish gent.

The paramedic asks 'Are you comfortable?'

The man says, 'No,I'm Paddy'.