jjrbus
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Posts posted by jjrbus
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One more for the lady's
Why is a man's brain slightly bigger than a dog's? I know, I know Who said it's bigger, than a dog's well it's a proven scientific fact, by male scientists.
so lets start again,
Why is a man's brain slightly bigger than a dog's
A. So we don't hump on your legs in public. Iknow, I know, I never met the guys you date.
Forget it, I'll never tell you women another joke, but our brain's are bigger.
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D80 Thank you for your very well thought out post. I was having a terrible time accepting that it was a cultural thing. Culture may play a part in behavior of this type, but still one should, be understanding, forgive and find another partner. Jim
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Very good IT, but sorry I'm not old enough to have plagiarized it from Winston.
Father and young son in supermarket, son looks at big lady and say's DAD LOOK AT THE BIG FAT LADY. father is really humiliated and trys to repremand son and explaine to him it is impolite to do such things.
Going to checkout, there is only one lane open, and of course there is the lady in line, father is very embarressed but gets in line anyway. After standing behind lady for a few moments the lady's pager goes off. The boy looks at Father whith horror in eye's and screams, LOOK OUT DAD SHE'S GOING TO BACK UP!!!!!!!!!!
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I read these post's so I can understand the Thai people, culture ect. My first respose was the guy is a scumbag, and then I read about the Thai seeing it as a gift, peer presure, family and then I think, maybe I'm wrong, just maybe it is a cultural thing. very confuseing. I'm trying to be open minded about this, but it is very difficult.
Jim
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It's so nice being acknowledged in other peoples post's, Gives me a warm fuzzy feeling.
Bon Appetite Jim
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A drunk gets on a bus and plop's down next to a fat lady, who looks at him with disqust and say's you smell. The drunk an intelligent, educated man, who has succumbed to the evil's of rum, say's to the lady, no madam you are wrong, You smell, I stink.
The outraged lady says, you've been drinking, and the drunk replys, and you madam are fat and ugly, The lady yell's at him, YOUR DRUNK, The drunk look's at her, smiles and replys, yes Mam but in the morning I'll be sober.
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Hey Sid
Give me a break, when I was a kid, someone like you was there complaining about the scool lunch, I go into the Marines and there you are again complaining about high quality food, and all you want. I go into the hospital and there you are again, whinning, I refuse to eat this garbage. perfectly good food. But not Mr. Happymeal. Now I am adult, on the internet and here you are again. IT'S NOT THE FOOD IT'S YOU. Go to McDonald's get your happy meal and shut up.
All food is wonderful and part of the celebration of life. I feel bad for you, not knowing what you are missing. Do you want to make the lady happy? or just pork her? Why not try sharing her culture, her way of life, her very being. You are like the person on tour bus, with a blindfold on, you are missing most of the trip. Come on man try you can do it.
Jim
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Lady catches her husband cheating, and warns him in no uncertain terms that if he does it again, he will be faced with loss of everthing and financial ruin.
A few week later when circus is is town, the miss's is driving by a motel and spot's hubby's car, That SOB (sweet old bill?)she scream's squeel's into lot, finds hubby coming out of room with midget lady from circus. She is screaming at him, and he is there pointing at midget lady, and saying but honey, can't you see I'm trying to cut down?
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While you were out your proctologist called.
They found your head.
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Q. How do you stop a poodel from humping on your leg?
A. Pick him up and suck him off
Q. What is the difference between a poodle humping on your leg and a pit bull doing it,
A. The pit bull gets to finish
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>>
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>Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we
>grow
>older, it's important that we keep mentally alert. The saying; "If you
>don't
>use it, you will lose it" also applies to the brain, so...,
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>Below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of
>intelligence.
>So, take the following test presented here and determine if you are losing
>it or are still "with it."
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>The spaces below are so you don't see the answers until you have made your
>own....
>OK, relax, clear your mind and....
>begin.
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>1. What do you put in a toaster?
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>Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," then give up now and go do something
>else. Try not to hurt yourself.
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>If you said, "bread," go to Question 2.
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>2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?
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>Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," please do not attempt the
>next question. Your brain is obviously over stressed and may even
>overheat. It may be that you need to content yourself with reading
>something more appropriate such as Children's World."
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>If you said "water" then proceed to question 3
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>3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from
>blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is
>made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?
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>Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks," what
>the devil are you still doing here reading these questions?????
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>If you said "glass," then go on to Question 4.
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>4. Twenty years ago, a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If you
>will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany
>and East Germany. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The
>pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides
>on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he has
>time and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land"
>between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you bury the survivors?
>East Germany or West Germany or in "no man's land"?
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>Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else,
>you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane
>crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated
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>If you said, "Don't bury the survivors" then proceed to the next question.
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>5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60 of a degree every minute then
>how many degrees will the hour hand move in one hour?
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>Answer: One degree. If you said "360 degrees" or anything other than "one
>degree," you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you are
>obviously out of your league. Turn your pencil in and exit the room.
>Everyone else proceed to the final question.
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>6. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to
>Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading,
>six people get off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people
>get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get
>in. In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen,
>six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven.
>What was the name of the bus driver?
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>Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember? It was YOU!!
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>Now pass this along to all your "friends" and hope they do better then you
>did!
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Q. Why do women wear makeup and perfume?
A. Cause they are ugly and they stink
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Older man sitting on bar stool, who has obviousely had to much to drink, Is weaving back and forth and closeing and opening eyes, first one and then the other, trying to focus on someone across the bar from him.
The young fellow's across the bar are getting uncomfortable with the attention, then one of them realizes what is happening, and says Relax oldtimer we are twins
The man with a shocked look says All four of you
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Young oriental man goes to Canada to pursue his fortune, opens a small restaurant.
Everday this obnoxious brit chap comes in and asks what the special is.
To which the hardworking oriental guy replies Flied lice and eggs. And the obnoxious brit laughs and laughs.
After being humiliated like this many times, the oriental guy hires a tutor and practices day and nite.
Finnaly the day, arrives the obnoxious brit comes in and says whats the special today chang.
The oriental guy proudly says fried rice and eggs. The obnoxious brit just stands there with a blank look on his face.
The oriental guy knowing he has won, stands there and says YOU PLICK.
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Mommy and daddy are in bedroom being intimate, daddy on back mommy on top bouncing up and down.
Little louie comes in room and says what are you doing?
Mommy very embareassed, and not knowing what to say, say's daddy's tummy is getting too big, and I'm trying to knock it down.
Little Louie says it's not going to work Mommy
Why not she replays?
Cause when you go to work the neighbor lady comes over and blows it back up.
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Young man goes on vacation to BKK and comes home with nasty STD, member is all red with yellow and purple spots and dripping. He goes to doctor and doctor tells him it must be amputated. Young man is horrified, and talks to friends.
One friend thinks, since it is oriental disease he should find oriental Doctor.
Young man goes to China town and finds old Oriental DR.
Goes into office and exlains what has happened.
Oriental Dr. says let me see member.
Young man shows him
Dr. bursts out in laughter, Sayin sirry americon Ductor.
Young man feel's a deep sense of relief and says, It does not have to be amputated?
Dr says Uh no, too, tree weks it's going to fall off.
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Thank you, thank you very much
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Starting in Dec.I'm going to be in Thailand for a few month's starting in Sukhumvit area of BKK, I would like to learn some Thai while I am there,I already have a couple of tapes I am listening too, but would like to hear your experiences in this area.
Jim
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Does the 15 yo friend have big nipples? Do you want a full service gym, with bbbj or just a workout gym, does it need to be near a massage parlor? With or without bar, We cannot help you with so little information. Can you send me $1000 USD, My mum is married to a rich Brit and I'm waiting for her to send me some money, you can hold my opals for collateral.
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I like to think of myself as a kind, compassionate,caring and forgiving person. I have visited people in jails and corresponded with some. I can find no compassion for this person and think that the penalty for drug dealing should be death. If he had not been caught he would still be out there ruining peoples lives and living high off the hog.
Think about your child, and this person in the pipeline getting heroin to them, what would you do if you caught him.
Jim
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While I do not know you welll enough to comment on your feelings, you are to be congradulated on knowing how you feel and realizing it is your problem and not his.I hope I can find a wife as wise as you. Talking about things like this with your friends or spiritual guides will help. Jim
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Hi Ray; Thank you for your very long and imformative post, much of it obviousely came from experience and the heart.Hope I run into you sometime.
Jim
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Did you ever think, maybe not everyone has as high of an opinion of you as you do? Yor are far too wordly and wonderful a person for lowly me to associate with. I've heard a term that describes you to a tee "His Majesty the baby"
I'll buy my own thank's
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Good point, I would not have thought of that, and I really am a professional cynic. I am under the impression you guys are really jaded, not a criticisim just an observation. The one I am IM with could not possible be useing an interperter.
I have been to Japan, Taiwan and the Phillipines, can the people in Thailand be that different?
I'm on my way to Thailand, I have a one way ticket for the 30th of Nov. and will stay till I want to leave. Might be 1 week might be never.
I've gained much knowledge from this forum, and would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone here.
A sinister 'cover-up'
in General Topics
Posted
Odd, there is a post from a newby who just found board, about lady who wants, to cut him off
and now this post about secretive goings on in Thailand, Look's like a conspiracy to get the board chattering.
Is the tooth fairy a gay dentist?