The week that was in Thailand news: Danger in Thailand – it’s all relative.

[rooster59]

The week that was in Thailand news: Danger in Thailand – it’s all relative.

 

 

I have always felt safe in Thailand. Like any resident with several decades in the kingdom behind them I could regale you with stories to the contrary but when their sum total is considered it would be scant return for 35 years.

And before I get criticized for not getting out enough and having rose tinted “wen” I could direct you to the opinion of my long suffering wives who would probably say, if they could converse in British vernacular, that I have been a right bloody toe-rag in my time.

In fact, no offence to the missuses, but most of the dire peril I have ever found myself in has mostly been in their exalted company when accused of various misdemeanors.

Proving that opinions of dangers are all, well, relative.

When confronted I am always innocent – a friend told me in my formative years in the 1980s to always deny everything with Thai women – then get your wallet out to grease the wheels of justice.

Perhaps the most danger I have faced – like many – is either behind the wheels of various cars or perched atop the seat of a succession of choppers and racing bikes that are my passion.

Three or four times perhaps, what passes for my life has passed before me, as I have luckily managed to flee the scene of seemingly certain death. About the same number of times as those tricky scrapes with the wives….

But by and large, this has been a happy Thai life free from threats and danger. Being able to talk my way out of trouble has helped of course – I wouldn’t like to live here and be unable to speak Thai well. It can lead to too many misunderstandings….

So it was this week on Thaivisa that we were told – admittedly in another one of those subjective surveys – that Bangkok has been named the 12th most dangerous place in the world.

Apart from the omission of several places around the world where I have been and couldn’t wait to get out of, the criteria of danger seemed ridiculous.

I have always kept it simple – if I feel safe walking around even the dodgiest areas of a town at night alone then that will do for me. I have always felt that way in Bangkok – or anywhere else in Thailand for that matter – not something I could say with any certainty where I was raised in London.

Still, Rooster wondered if that story was behind Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg’s “about face” in snubbing His Generalness.

Facebook said that he never intended to visit in the first place while Big Too stayed quiet and let his minging minions faff about and cover his tracks.

The Nation in a wooly editorial about Thais being well connected said he really ought to come while the current Mrs Rooster summed it up best when viewing a picture of Mr Z:

“Khrai wa?”

It’s a pity he isn’t making the trip, though. Look at all that Bill Gates has done for hanging wires.

Not wishing to tempt fate or wish him harm, but if Mr Zuckerberg had been conveniently run down by a speeding police pick-up we might have seen some action on road safety or even police reform.

At the very least he might have seen one or two dangerously overloaded trucks – like the one pictured online that showed the cops transporting tent poles ready to skewer any passing motorcyclist or even unwary pedestrian.

Like Mr Gates all he needed was to come and share a few holiday snaps online and Thailand would have risen up the league table of safety in a Facebook nanosecond.

Not caring about the danger on the roads, probably for a few decades, is Monta Yokratanakan otherwise known on Thaivisa as Lady Kai.

Last year’s most unpopular person in Thailand – even usurping the tourism minister – was found guilty of human trafficking for being mean to her maids who she accused of stealing. She was given three years but that is just for starters.

The sixty year old faces Lese Majeste charges for allegedly impersonating a princess so she is unlikely to need another maid or even her own home for a while.

The forum reveled in her comeuppance but soon switched their ire to the other female they would like to see removed from high society – yes, our very own Khun Kobkarn at tourism and sports.

But weren’t they being a little harsh on Her Elegantness this week for being all gung-ho about the upcoming Bangkok Marathon due to be held in February?

Maybe. The problem with Khun Kobkarn is that she forgets that she is not Toshiba CEO anymore but an elected – ok unelected – minister of the government. She bandies around statements like the marathon will be the best in the world in three years and claims the event will generate nearly a billion baht in revenue.

Still, I loved the irony of the proposed finish line after the 26 miles 385 yards.

The Democracy Monument.

Thankfully George the pensioner who had his British or Australian lights punched out in the school car park faded into obscurity which is more than could be said about the beach smoking ban that has appropriately enflamed Thaivisa forum opinion.

Hardly surprising when the environment chap who came up with the idea – and who should have been relieved of his portfolio after suggesting that people should be jailed – then kept digging in his hole in the sand by presiding over the latest farcical debacle.

In what Rooster termed an “appeasement to smokers” in the Midweek Rant the expert has come up with the idea of ten lovely little “fishbowls” lining the beach at Bang Saen to house the addicts.

Apart from the fact that they will become more like ovens in no time and will probably be fitted with air-conditioners, should they not be blacked out or at least vaselined.

I mean, the nations’ children can’t see smoking on TV or in the movies but here the smokers will be in full view of families. It might also contravene the country’s rules on cigarette advertising…..

Of course the Thais are just trying to be nice to tourists for, heaven forbid, should we ever offend the god of tourism – do that and we’d be joining Lady Kai for breakfast.

Evidence that pictures of tourists in trouble bring action were to the fore in the story that showed Westerners sunbathing among the plastic bottles and used condoms washed up on Jomtien on Tuesday.

Within a matter of hours we were told that the beach was back to its “pristine” best as the local mayor rousted his staff and the heavy diggers to show the world that the Thais mean business.

Will the cameras still be there tomorrow when the latest trash from the latest floods blows back to shore.

Of course, but how much more sensible it would be if the authorities looked at the experiences of the tourists’ homelands and deal with the litter problem at source rather than after the fact.

And it is a pity the authorities are not willing to throw some money at an obvious threat to tourism – unlike the “investment” that is being made in radar guns to equip the constabulary in their fight against the public.

Like the war on drugs, they’re wasting their time trying to stop Joe Soap doing speed.

Well in excess of half a billion baht is being spent on this latest lunacy that will achieve nothing. Again it is shutting the stable door after Shergar became horse burgers.

In both cases such obscene funding would be better spent educating the public via TV and online not to litter and drive fast in the first place.

I seem to remember that is what started to change behavior where I was brought up – that and an overhaul to root out bent coppers. Admittedly, the Thais will need to have a few billion in reserve to address that particular hot chestnut.

Tourists enjoying – well not exactly enjoying perhaps – a free stay, are all the Nigerians locked up in the kingdom’s jails. A Nigerian official speaking back home claimed that there are nearly 1,000 of his countrymen in clink in Thailand.

They ought to be repatriated – surely giving the Thais yet more ideas in law breaking ought to be discouraged.

Just send them back to Abuja and ask them to “thong thiaw in Togo” next time.

Tourists behaving badly – or at least strangely - made for some amusing pictures to go with our morning coffee this week. First up came the Chinese man merrily dragging on a huge bamboo bong outside departures at Don Meuang.

It emerged that it was “just” tobacco and the Thais were all smiles – clearly Mr Chin had read about the beach smoking ban and thought he’d find somewhere more acceptable to fire up his bong. The official looking on did about as much as that cop in the Pattaya school car park last week.

While later in the week we were treated to “Mr R Crusoe” floating on a castaway water bed in the middle of the sea off QUOTES (the Queen Of The Eastern Seaboard).

Old father time, complete with flowing white beard, seemed quite content even without a bong, but the kind guys of ocean rescue thought he would be happier back at Soi 6 in time for tea.

And so to this week’s Rooster award, for there is but one. The latest recipient of the “Darwin Award for Services to the Gene Pool” goes to the young house owner who thought he could escape the attentions of the drug raiding fuzz by hiding behind a bucket in his toilet after putting his Ya Ba in the loo.

Not only did he forget to flush but his feet stuck out a little.

To be fair to the local constabulary they are dumb – but not that dumb.

Finally this week will see the closing chapter in what for many has been a year of mourning and reflection after the death of the beloved monarch. Tears will flow anew as the ceremony and sense of occasion that the Thais do so well is beamed across the globe to a worldwide audience.

No one will be surprised if it rains.


Rooster

 

 

 

-- © Copyright Thai Visa News 2017-10-21

[wakeupplease]

You know one thing than annoys me is when I go out with my Thai wife and she keeps on at me about how dangerous it is do not do that or this or lock car when pulled up by police for a check, dont look at other road users, its constant from her even shopping I get the same instructions. That sort of scares me to hear a local talk like that. So must be some truth in it.

[seeyoujimmy]

I feel a lot safer here walking about at night than I would doing the same in Glasgow

but I never feel safe driving on the roads.

[mok199]

traffic, creates chaos which in turn creates stress and rage,combined with this heat and humidity its like gasoline on a fire...stop this insanity of tour buses in the city end the limitless amount of songtews and taxis and motorbikes..,more park and rides,more green space, then see how fast big citys in Thailand regains some sense of normality,in pattaya the beach is nothng more than a boat launch,the tour buses use each and every road and small soi to park ,where the drivers hang out to dry thier dirty socks,and bragg to his pals about his ''BIG BUS'', the cars are double parked and motorcycles block our walkways,Now I have no happiness at home as a man now sells bbq chicken outside my living room window.my boy is getting brain washed at school and if I dare say anything ''well I might as well go to another school as thais will not except any critisim,i now have a nasal bacteria infection from the dirty filthy  air I breath in pattaya......on and on and on.. crime is the least of my issues here in the''land of smiles''..sawadee no crap..ps..today is my bday..

Edited October 22, 2017 by mok199
speliing

[Stargeezr]

Happy Birthay Pattaya Farang!  I will be visiting Thailand again this year during my Bday which is

in February. Being in a hot country is much nicer than freezing my butt in Canada. I will be in

Jomien beach likely for my Bday, or in Hua Hin or possibly BKK . All I kow is that I am fortunate

enough to be able to afford a hioliday in Thailand, when most of my Thai relatives can not

afford a vacation in my country, every 5 to 10 years. Another good read Rooster,  glad you have

enjoyed so many years in LOS.

Geezer

[bazza73]

I don't consider Thailand to be dangerous. There are various elements of risk, yes; however, that's a matter of adjusting my own reactions accordingly. So that means defensive driving, and not getting shit-faced and aggressive in a bar. Simple really - I don't go to bars anymore.

IMHO other falangs can pose more of a problem than Thais. There's some that should have " EXPORT PROHIBITED " stamped on their foreheads.

[YetAnother]

danger is NOT relative, it is absolute. if you get your arm taken off it is not something 'relative';

thailand is a dangerous place, period; rampant stupidity. mai pen rai, racism against Anything not thai make thailand a minefield for non thais 

[gamini]

1 hour ago, YetAnother said:

danger is NOT relative, it is absolute. if you get your arm taken off it is not something 'relative';

thailand is a dangerous place, period; rampant stupidity. mai pen rai, racism against Anything not thai make thailand a minefield for non thais 

Pattaya accounts for 95% of the crime involving foreigners. The rest of Thailand is safer than most other countries.

[Jonah Tenner]

3 hours ago, YetAnother said:

danger is NOT relative, it is absolute. if you get your arm taken off it is not something 'relative';

thailand is a dangerous place, period; rampant stupidity. mai pen rai, racism against Anything not thai make thailand a minefield for non thais 

I think the point was that in Thailand the greatest danger is relatives, like a Thai wife...

[Enzian]

My son is coming to Thailand for the first time. He is still young (28). He likes to take exploratory road trips, himself driving. He's never driven on the left. No problem he says. I say: until you've seen it you cannot comprehend the degree of stupidity; you don't know what the lack of law enforcement means; you don't realize that if you are in an accident and the other party is Thai, you will be in the wrong no matter what happened...  He says: that's pretty strange...