Should I Be Concerned for My Life

[bowerboy]

I work for a multinational company on the Eastern Seaboard.

 

Over the last 2 plus years I have had to deal with one the most difficult employees that I have ever had to deal with in my life (English guy, not Thai). 

 

He has divorced his English wife and fallen in love with a Thai girl and does not want to return to UK. He is however on a fixed term contract that expires this week and so we are not obliged to continue his employment. He is so desperate to stay now that he has made several attempts to have me fired by making complaints directly to our Senior Management in USA all of which have failed. So I am staying and he is leaving (I have a permanent contract) and he is absolutely full of hatred for me and seems to blame me for all of his problems. I don’t think I have done anything to justify his intense feelings towards me but I accept that everyone has their own viewpoint and maybe I have in some way made him feel like this.

 

The girl he is now with is from a dubious background (you can probably fill in the blanks) and I can imagine the conversations they must have about me. In his eyes I am standing in the way of his future life in Thailand and his girlfriend probably see it the same way (she has a young kid and there is probably a 30 year age difference).

 

This guy is completely irrational (many have said the same, it’s not just me) and I think the girlfriend may be too.

 

I have found myself increasingly nervous and constantly looking over my shoulder. If we were in a “civilized” world then I wouldn’t give it a second thought. However we live and work in Chonburi area.

 

Obviously this would seem insane to suggest to our head office that I am worried for my life and they should do something about it. But what do you Thai old hands think about this? Am I justified in being worried? Could this happen or am I being silly/paranoid?

 

Considering the guy and girlfriend are irrational and not thinking straight is and see me as the problem then could they or would they pay to have me killed or beaten up.

 

Am I being overly paranoid. Should I report this feeling to my company or will that make me look stupid/insane?

[Kwasaki]

Not knowing about your living cicumstances and not knowing you difficult, so if you are not a physical person able to watch your back then make a report to the police about your concerns and let him know and her you have done that. 

So many questions is he still staying in Thailand without a job near you for one. 

[NCC1701A]

1 hour ago, bowerboy said:

I work for a multinational company on the Eastern Seaboard.

does your company have a HR department? I would send a email to them saying you have been threatened by a employee.

[bowerboy]

Thanks for your thoughts.

 

Yes I had thought exactly the same...ie: Speak to HR and then ask them to engage a security contractor to advise our company on correct course of action and potentially inform this employee that my concerns have been made known.

 

I can look after myself and have no fear whatsoever of this person per se.....what I AM worried about is hired thugs or even hired hit men.

 

Either way it is a shame that we may well end up living in the same area whatever happens. This guy is not going home because of the divorce he now is going through.

[metisdead]

A troll post advising questionable advice has been removed. 

[Ctkong]

In Thailand it is easy to make a person go away... be it foreigner or Thai. That is why it is imperative to show a good smiley face to your adversaries and friends regardless of your feelings inside. 

You never know when they would strike . A loaded sachet of white powder on your person, or in your car can bring great distress. A crooked cop can also lead to your misfortune. In your case , the reason the guy was trying to get you fired was not explained.

is it because only one of you two can stay behind doing same or similar job description ? If so, then we can see the guy’s point of view of hating you. 

[petermik]

Two sides to every story....I wonder what the other guy would say......????

[OneMoreFarang]

What would he gain if you would be dead? I guess he would still lose his job.

Obviously it's difficult to understand what's going on in the head of someone like that, but I would guess first he would try to threaten you so that you continue to hire him (or help him to keep the contract).

Did he do something like that?

 

What you could do is have a hidden camera on you and maybe you see him somewhere outside. Look if he comes over and talks to you or threatens you. If he does you have some evidence. And if you give that evidence to the right people and let him know you did that then this make him suspect #1 if something will every happen to you.

He must be very stupid to still do something or hire somebody.

[Nyezhov]

23 minutes ago, NCC1701A said:

does your company have a HR department? I would send a email to them saying you have been threatened by a employee.

Its an American company. A written report to your HR Department triggers all sorts of responses, most of which will be designed not so much to protect you, but to protect the company from your heirs suing them. I would expect swift action.

[KMartinHandyman]

Clear your head, man up and do your job. Lay low and watch your back. Say nothing to anyone and let his destiny play out. Going to HR or talking to him or coworkers is only going to blow up in your face.
I mean this in the nicest way. He could have no physical plans but your inference of being fearful that he will hurt you could set him off.

[OneMoreFarang]

Maybe a look at the (personal) statistic is helpful.

I guess about everybody who arrives in Thailand will hear sometime soon how cheap it is to hire a hitman (imagined or not, I don't know). And most of us will have visited one or the other place with people who seem to do not only legal business. That means lots of people have, at least in theory, access to a hitman.

But how often does something happen?

We hear from time to time from the flyers-club but that seems to be often connected to love affairs. Did anybody ever hear from a business person that anybody in the company was harmed because they fired someone?

I never heard a story like that, and I am here since a long time.

So possible, but it seems very unlikely.

[JimmyTheMook]

Perhaps a private discussion in the office bathroom stalls with a tube of KY jelly at the ready?

 

[55Jay]

Why does this guy, and his gf, view you as the problem?

[puukao]

I would email the guy's embassy in Thailand and make as many paper trails as you can....  but do it in a private way.  Private message the embassy on Facebook, email, maybe even a phone call if possible.  Avoid all conversation with him.  if you must, act dumb.  never give him even one reason to get upset.  he wants you to get mad, don't.  and, if possible, make stuff up.... tell him you have some bad luck back home.  maybe family member very sick, you lost money, something...anything so he will think you are also down on your luck.  something so that he thinks you are not enjoying your life.  

[OneMoreFarang]

5 minutes ago, puukao said:

I would email the guy's embassy in Thailand and make as many paper trails as you can....  but do it in a private way.  Private message the embassy on Facebook, email, maybe even a phone call if possible.  Avoid all conversation with him.  if you must, act dumb.  never give him even one reason to get upset.  he wants you to get mad, don't.  and, if possible, make stuff up.... tell him you have some bad luck back home.  maybe family member very sick, you lost money, something...anything so he will think you are also down on your luck.  something so that he thinks you are not enjoying your life.  

What's the logic behind this suggestion?

[puukao]

Just now, OneMoreFarang said:

What's the logic behind this suggestion?

this guy is losing his job, and money, and maybe ability to stay in Thailand.  he's mad.  i'm sure he thinks the OP is "winning" and took away all his future money.  If the OP makes it seem like he's not "winning," then maybe he won't want to get rid of him.  Easier to hate some guy acting like life is great, than a guy who is also down on his luck.  

 

i think it makes sense.  

 

oh, i'm super mad at you.  you tell me you just found out you have cancer or your mom died or your lost your house.  oh.....now, maybe not as mad.  

[OneMoreFarang]

6 minutes ago, puukao said:

this guy is losing his job, and money, and maybe ability to stay in Thailand.  he's mad.  i'm sure he thinks the OP is "winning" and took away all his future money.  If the OP makes it seem like he's not "winning," then maybe he won't want to get rid of him.  Easier to hate some guy acting like life is great, than a guy who is also down on his luck.  

 

i think it makes sense.  

 

oh, i'm super mad at you.  you tell me you just found out you have cancer or your mom died or your lost your house.  oh.....now, maybe not as mad.  

Ok, makes sense. Thanks for the explanation. At least for me it was not obvious.

[bowerboy]

1 hour ago, Ctkong said:

In Thailand it is easy to make a person go away... be it foreigner or Thai. That is why it is imperative to show a good smiley face to your adversaries and friends regardless of your feelings inside. 

You never know when they would strike . A loaded sachet of white powder on your person, or in your car can bring great distress. A crooked cop can also lead to your misfortune. In your case , the reason the guy was trying to get you fired was not explained.

is it because only one of you two can stay behind doing same or similar job description ? If so, then we can see the guy’s point of view of hating you. 

Yes essentially his perception was that it was either me or him...in reality that was not the case but nevertheless that is how he saw it.

[Odysseus123]

Amazing..

 

Yup in the middle of the usual Byzantine office politics (with a touch of Casino Royale) I too would get on ThaiVisa and spill the beans..

 

An Englishman,eh?

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

How much time is left until he has to leave the country? If it’s not long, maybe you can take some time off until he is gone? 

[bowerboy]

23 minutes ago, 55Jay said:

Why does this guy, and his gf, view you as the problem?

 

Thank you for this question and also to everyone for their response.

 

There are some specific reasons why he does not like me...I am a bit reluctant to go into deep detail lest he read this (also a few people that are close to the situation could read this and figure it out if I give too much info).

 

Essentially though said person has a proven track record of not working well with others...I have had many people in the company discuss this guy with me and warn me about him. 

 

I know now there are 2 sides to every story and he has his side but all of it has been completely irrational from the beginning. 

 

No he he has never made any threats and that is part of the problem...again I don’t want to say too much but essentially he is as nice as pie to your face and then 20 minutes later you have a call from HR about a written complaint just been filed against you with reasons as to why I should be fired and what the succession plan would be in that event....I can’t give too many more details than that.

[akirasan]

What's he done to make you worried you'll get killed? 

[bowerboy]

45 minutes ago, KMartinHandyman said:

Clear your head, man up and do your job. Lay low and watch your back. Say nothing to anyone and let his destiny play out. Going to HR or talking to him or coworkers is only going to blow up in your face.
I mean this in the nicest way. He could have no physical plans but your inference of being fearful that he will hurt you could set him off.

 

Yeah very good points and I had thought this also.

[Odysseus123]

5 minutes ago, akirasan said:

What's he done to make you worried you'll get killed? 

Nothing,apparently.

 

It seems that he has accessed HR and the poster hasn't.

 

It's not exactly a Buster Scruggs event..

 

 

Edited March 15, 2019 by Odysseus123

[bowerboy]

33 minutes ago, puukao said:

I would email the guy's embassy in Thailand and make as many paper trails as you can....  but do it in a private way.  Private message the embassy on Facebook, email, maybe even a phone call if possible.  Avoid all conversation with him.  if you must, act dumb.  never give him even one reason to get upset.  he wants you to get mad, don't.  and, if possible, make stuff up.... tell him you have some bad luck back home.  maybe family member very sick, you lost money, something...anything so he will think you are also down on your luck.  something so that he thinks you are not enjoying your life.  

Good advice and thank you....initial discussion with HR was to avoid contact as much as possible...

[Nyezhov]

2 minutes ago, bowerboy said:

.I can’t give too many more details than that.

Sounds like all mysterious and suchlike....hey, like dude, is there any sneaky office sex involved? Groping by the water cooler? Panting steamy fondlings in the janitors closet? Long lingering glances at sales meetings, cute little double entendres when passing by in the halls, snatched moments of passions in the briefest fluttering of fingers together? Ball gags? Masks? Gummi jumpsuits?

[bowerboy]

27 minutes ago, puukao said:

this guy is losing his job, and money, and maybe ability to stay in Thailand.  he's mad.  i'm sure he thinks the OP is "winning" and took away all his future money.  If the OP makes it seem like he's not "winning," then maybe he won't want to get rid of him.  Easier to hate some guy acting like life is great, than a guy who is also down on his luck.  

 

i think it makes sense.  

 

oh, i'm super mad at you.  you tell me you just found out you have cancer or your mom died or your lost your house.  oh.....now, maybe not as mad.  

Thanks and yes agreed...actually the words you have used are uncanny...he actually framed it that exact way in one of his many letters to HR.

 

They are completely exasperated by this guy too...you can’t write to HR about someone “winning”....

 

He does see it exactly the way you described...I am guessing his girlfriend might too...this is what worries me.

[Kinnock]

For the local 'Chico' mafia types - targeting a foreigner would be a big deal, and I personally feel it's very unlikely anyone would take on a job to threaten you.

 

But I understand how you must be feeling, and I also agree that a US company would take this very seriously.  Don't over-react as you risk sounding like a problem for your company, but just calmly report your assessment of a potential risk.  

 

Also, if you have friends with contacts at a reasonably senior level in the Police (your company head of Security or Government relations manager for example) then get them to have a quiet word. (but be aware of Defamation Laws, so emphasis on 'quiet' word).

 

The more of the right people who know of your concerns, the less chance he will do anything stupid.

[Odysseus123]

1 minute ago, Kinnock said:

For the local 'Chico' mafia types - targeting a foreigner would be a big deal, and I personally feel it's very unlikely anyone would take on a job to threaten you.

 

But I understand how you must be feeling, and I also agree that a US company would take this very seriously.  Don't over-react as you risk sounding like a problem for your company, but just calmly report your assessment of a potential risk.  

 

Also, if you have friends with contacts at a reasonably senior level in the Police (your company head of Security or Government relations manager for example) then get them to have a quiet word. (but be aware of Defamation Laws, so emphasis on 'quiet' word).

 

The more of the right people who know of your concerns, the less chance he will do anything stupid.

Astounding.

 

[bowerboy]

2 minutes ago, Kinnock said:

For the local 'Chico' mafia types - targeting a foreigner would be a big deal, and I personally feel it's very unlikely anyone would take on a job to threaten you.

 

But I understand how you must be feeling, and I also agree that a US company would take this very seriously.  Don't over-react as you risk sounding like a problem for your company, but just calmly report your assessment of a potential risk.  

 

Also, if you have friends with contacts at a reasonably senior level in the Police (your company head of Security or Government relations manager for example) then get them to have a quiet word. (but be aware of Defamation Laws, so emphasis on 'quiet' word).

 

The more of the right people who know of your concerns, the less chance he will do anything stupid.

 

Excellent advice....thank you.