The Plan, By Robin Williams

[MP5]

You gotta love Robin Williams...... Even if he's nuts! Leave it to Robin Williams to come up with the perfect plan. What we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.

Robin Williams' plan...(Hard to argue with this logic!)

"I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here's one plan."

1) "The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those 'good ole boys', we will never "interfere" again.

2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany , South Korea , the Middle East, and the Philippines . They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.

3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They're illegal!!! France will welcome them.

4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.

5) No foreign "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a "D" and it's back home baby.

6) The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.

7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go some place else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)

8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not "interfere." They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.

9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island some place. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH...learn it...or LEAVE...Now, isn't that a winner of a plan?

"The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'you want a piece of me?' "

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am sorry if this offends you, I am using my constitutional right to "FREEDOM OF SPEECH"

[Naam]

You gotta love Robin Williams......

i do like the actor Robin Williams and until recently i was convinced that his IQ is far above the 74.9 (which indicates a retarded person).

now i have strong doubts that my jugdment was fair.

[A_Traveller]

Allowing for the location, the piece is not from Robin Williams, it originally appeared on a motorcycle group and the final statue of liberty quote, which is from Robin Williams was attached which led to the attribution of the whole. The author is, AFAIK unknown.

Regards

PS However he did say "God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time."

/edit add PS//

Edited April 13, 2007 by A_Traveller

[sbk]

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House.

The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery.

We have a president for whom English is a second language. He's like 'We have to get rid of dictators,' but he's pretty much one himself.

All by Robin Williams. I have also heard that the only part of the OP's joke attributable to Robin Williams is the final quote:

"The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'you want a piece of me?' "