Single Mom W/ 2.5 Year Old Coming To Bkk...

[meandlay]

Hello all,

I'll be visiting Bangkok in January for a month with my 2.5 year old daughter. (Coming from the US.)

I'm trying to get a feel of what it's like to be there with a toddler. Will the pollution be a problem? What about the food?

Are there any things that I should be aware of before I come?

BTW, I see many caucasion women on this board (the ones that mentioned it). I'm african american. Am I likely to encounter any ill will?

Thanks for any advice you ladies can offer.

Alexis

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Post your question in the womens forum Alexis. The expat girls will give you some good advice.

[sbk]

Welcome to the forum! Well, I find the pollution in Bangkok a problem, but usually if I stay there longer than 4-5 days. But then, I live on an island with clean air, so maybe I don't have a good tolerance level!

To be honest, I don't know if you will encounter ill will. You may find yourself treated oddly out in the country, but then, out in the country (truly rural areas), any foreigner gets treated oddly.

As for your toddler, well, my sister came when her son was 4 and had a great time, Thai people love children and you will find mos people will be very kind to your child.

Food; well, my sister's son ate alot of plain rice (good thing he liked it!). I don't know how fussy your baby is, but you can always get by on fruit and rice for a short period of time. You can also get ahold of peanut butter at the supermarkets and make pb&j's if you child gets tired of rice.

[Boo]

Hi Alexis,

sbk is right, I think you'll probably encounter a lot of staring but then all "foreigners" in thailand are stared at. You might also get a lot of questions being a women travelling alone with a child but nothing rude for sure, just curiosity. Again, thai people love children & being a mum on her own you'll probably get lot of attention & offers of help with the baby. I can't say that I think Bangkok would be the best place to holiday with a toddler though & maybe if you were thinking about going else where in the kingdom, then do it, the south is good & has lots to keep a small child occupied, swimming, beaches, other kids on the beach etc & some r & r for a busy single mum is always good Foodwise, you can't beat 7-11, they are all over the country, every 5 yards in fact & sell bread, eggs, hotogs, sweets (candy) fruit, sandwiches, microwave pizza etc for when your really stuck but generally even in really far out places you can get a plain omlette whipped up or some bbq chicken, no problem. (invest in a phrase book with a extended food section)

Have a great time & welcome to the forum.

Boo

[Aranya]

Hi Alexis! I don't have much to add to what sbk and boo already explained so well but I wanted to say welcome to the board and to Bangkok

[Nat]

Hi meandlay

The pollution shouldn’t be a problem for the amount of time you’re spending, unless your daughter suffers from any respiratory problems, in which case best to see a doctor.

There’s plenty of fresh food around and like the girls mentioned heaps of western food to be found. A western friend of mine also has a 2 year old daughter here who loves the sausages from 7-11 – she can’t enough of them, esp while watching the Telletubies .

From what I’ve seen the thai people adore young children – I’m often surrounded by very young children both at work and around my condo and they are always treated affectionately (not only by me but also by the thais ).

Like sbk really don’t know if you’ll encounter ill will, but I do have an african american friend living here and she hasn’t encountered anything overtly negative. She has had thais comment on how dark her skin is, but nothing offensive.

Have to agree with Boo, bangkok’s not the best place for a holiday esp since thailand has so many beautiful beaches (am wishing I was on one right now ). Anyway hope you and your daughter have a great holiday.

[meandlay]

Thanks for the feedback Nat, Aranya, book and sbk... greatly appreciated!

I've been getting quite a few recommendations about the beaches in Thailand. I'm thinking maybe I'll split my time between the city and the beach. I've heard Koh Samet is nice. (Other recommendations?)

I run several different web sites. So I have to make sure that wherever I go there's Internet access.

As for my daughter, she's a picky eater, but she likes trying new things. She'll eat something once or twice and then not want it again for months. Unfortunately she can't eat dairy or eggs, so that's what limits me a lot of the time.

BTW, is monsoon season really terrible in Bangkok? This is basically going to be an around the world trip, and I'm trying to plan where I'm going to be and when.

Thanks again,

Alexis

[Boo]

Nats your girl for advise on Samet, she lived their previously to moving to Bangkok. I would probably advise that you go to more popular islands as the facilities as well as the choice of food will be more extensive, nat, whats the hospitals/docs like on samet?? (& not u drpp ). With a small child medical care is most likely a big priority for you & samui, Krabi, Phuket & the larger islands all have international (standard?) hospitals with Englsih speaking staff. Southern Thailand beaches are not the unexplored wilderness they once were & even on the smallest island you can find a lot of home comforts, so anywhere will be ok, it all depends on how native you want to go. Cold water, no aircon, sticky rice & deep fried grasshoppers 5 star luxury, al a carte meals, chauffer driven aircon cars, the choice really is yours, somewhere in between (but not the grasshoppers) is nice cause you can feel like your really experiencing another culture whilst keeping your little one cool, happy & well fed

I hate to tell you this though, but running several businesses whilst in los via the internet from internet cafes (of which there are millions) may be very time consuming & expensive for you. The service provided by most places is your basic run of the mill support for hotmail/yahoo etc so speeds tend to be slow & the costs can vary greatly from place to place. I wouldn't really know how you would resolve this but I suppose there may be other ways. Anyone have any ideas?

Round the world trip though, wow, where else are you planning on going?

Boo

[p1p]

You might like to take a look at Chiang Mai & the north too. Nice laid back atmosphere and mountain air. (Check pollution levels first though. Should not be too bad in Jan, but never can tell.)

Good luck, welcome to the board and have a great time while you are here. You may not want to go back.

[meandlay]

Boo... I heard something about a lot of jellyfish on Samui. Is this a problem?

I will be traveling to Costa Rica, Mexico (to get some dental work done!), London, Paris, Italy (not sure where), Thailand, Malaysia, Australia. We'll probably deviate from the schedule though. I'm so excited to go.

p1p... thanks for the advice. My family and friends keep telling me that I'm probably not going to come back to the US. They're probably right!

Thanks,

Alexis

[Tattytam]

Koh Samui is fine, there are sometimes jelly fish but nothing that is a huge problem. I have a 2 1/2 year old son and he swims nearly every day!

Samui is easy with children, we have good medical facilities, several internet places have asdl (is that right?) access, there is even a Tesco here now for essential food supplies!

If you want any more info feel free to PM me anytime!

Tam

[Aranya]

I haven't been to Samui in ages!!! Reading your posts about that place makes me want to go for another visit soon!

[rainman]

IMO, the pollution is only half as bad as everyone says. Yeah sure, if you sit on a tuk-tuk for two hours straight in standing traffic, it may be a little extreme, but just being in a taxi or walking a few feet will hardly kill anyone here.

[meandlay]

Tam... thanks for the info on Samui. Now I'm all excited to go!

rainman... thanks for the feedback on the pollution. I lived in Los Angeles several years ago, and many days I could stand on a hill near my house and see an incredible layer of smog just sitting over the city. So I'm used to smog.

Regards,

Alexis

[kat]

Meandly:

I'm also new to this forum, but I have been in Thailand fo awhile. I work with refugees, so I get a different earful of life in the big mango. For the most part, everywhere else is better than Bangkok. Although I live in Bangkok, my sister has a child the same age as yours, and I wouldn't recommend staying for long in BKK. The diesel fumes can be cumulative and particularly harmful for a child. There is also a lot of chaotic traffic, so the streets ca be nervewracking with kids. In terms of the food, it's great, and Thais prepare baby food for their own children, which is the same food without chilies. They do really adore children and your child should be an icebreaker with a lot of people.

I'm also a woman of color from the states (New York), so I'm sensitive to what you are asking. I am light-skinned and pass for white to most people, but many Thais often comment on my skin tone being tanned. They often wonder why I chose to be dark when I can as easily be light. But this only becomes especially grating if you are thinking of staying a long time here.

I can tell you that although no one suspects I'm mixed, it is at least a little different for black folks out here. Of course, as long as you have money, that is a salve for everything. But, there are definite attitudes, presumptions, and politics. We can say that it's the same in states (or most of the west for that matter), but it's not. Two friends of my travelled out here (both A-A women), and they didn't care for it. I met some Africans living here that worked for the UN, and everyone treated them like refugees (which isn't humanitarian in nature here). I met another African woman living in Bangkok with her working African husband, and she just stays above it all by having the dignity and the money to ignore their comments in Thai (which she understands) when they ask her Thai maid why she works for a black woman.

Anyway, travelling around Asia certainly won't be simple for an A-A woman. And there are also issues just on the plain woman aspect of it. I'll probably be back in the states by January, but please feel free to email me. I have also heard middle and upperclass Thais that have travelled abroad and gone to university make some really horrendus comments about black people. But then on the flip side, I dated a Southern Thai guy who had bunches of friends that all wanted to be Bob Marley, so, it's a matter of finding them. For the most part though, I pretty much stay to myself out here. It has been a very enlightening experince, and hey, the shopping, beaches, and food are out of this world. It's a great place to visit.

Sorry to the rest of you if my comments seem negative and downwardly. I know I'm new to this forum and I don't want to leave a bad impression. But not everyone's experience of Thailand is great. Meandley if you are still reading these postings please drop me a reply, or anyone else for that matter.

[Tattytam]

I don't know if it is different in Southern Thailand then from Bangkok, but we have plenty of visitors of all descriptions and I have never heard anyone complaining about abuse.

I have a friend from Jamacia who I was talking to today about this funnily enough. She said she gets alot of looks, but then she is very stricking looking anway! She has never had any problems so hopefully you won't encounter any either.

If you do end up coming down to Samui, send me a PM, maybe we can meet up and let the kids play together!

[Nat]

nat, whats the hospitals/docs like on samet??

Hospital? Unless some more of the park is “accidentally” cleared, there’s no space. There is a medical centre and the doctor’s english is very good – handy for the occasional bout of cystitis or sore throat, but best to go to the main land for all else.

I've actually seen quite a few families on holiday on samet with young children - it's a very child friendly place.

[meandlay]

Kat,

Thanks for your insightful reply. I've traveled quite a bit in the US and Europe, and have encountered only a handful of unsavory individuals who clearly didn't like me because of my skin color. I won't step foot in Rhode Island or Boston (except for Martha's Vineyard) for this very reason. Not saying that all people from RI and Massachusetts are racist, because you have black folks living in both places. But I personally didn't like the atmosphere. I was very uncomfortable, especially in RI where I was called the 'N' word directly to my face.

It's a sad thing, but you have to be cautious of traveling off the beaten path when you have darker skin. That's why I always try to get a feel of what the atmosphere is like. Especially now that I have a little one in tow.

In regards to the Thai's, I've recently read that many of them have a thing against darker skin. They believe that being snow white shows you are of higher status. (You work in an office, instead of working the paddy's.)

I've read that there's no violence against darker skin people. But there's a definite underlying stigma.

I'm still coming to Thailand, but it's good to get both sides of the story.

Tattytam... I'll definitely PM you when we come.

Alexis

[rainman]

Depends how you look at it. If a white person goes into a restaurant full of black people and sits in the middle of them, he will get some strange looks as well, possibly some comments, too. Racism, in one way or another, is a part of every culture, every person. You make differences between who's black, who's white, who's yellow or who's green the moment you look at a person with a different skin color than yours. Violent racism is a whole different story. I personally have quite some black friends from the time when i was living in the US, but whenever i was with them or i was the only white person, i never got the same acceptance. Don't get me wrong, i don't have anything against any skin color, though.

Racism most likely comes from an inner instinct, something that remained with us since the stone age. Different appearance or skin color means a different tribe.

So my point is, racism is a part of our daily lives, for any race. It happens in any culture. There aren't many black people in Thailand, so you may get some looks as you walk by, but no violence for sure. Never seen it here.

[meandlay]

Good point Rainman.

I understand that I will probably get some stares. I'm prepared for that. I get that here in the US because of the type of business I'm in.

That I can deal with.

I just wanted to make sure that I wouldn't be in any situations where me or my daughters well-being would compromised. As long as everything's okay on that behalf, I can handle some staring.

Thanks,

Alexis