A Friend In Need

[connor]

Hi all

Wonder if anyone can help?

Got a friend who is currently in the uk with two months left on her sv. She is currently living with her husband & his two kids from previous marrige 16 & 18 in a 2 bed council flat. The goverment do not know this. They have a 2 year old son together.

Things have not been going well. He takes all the child benefit direct into his bank, gives her nothing. He is unemployed on benefits. She works in Tony & Guy salon as a beautition but earns peanuts so cannot afford to take care herself. He makes her pay for elec, milk babysitter while she works etc etc.

Basically she wants to remain in the UK but seperate with him. He has told her to F Off to Thailand & leave there son with him. He has hidden the kids UK passport & Birth cert etc. There son did not have a thai passport even though born there.

The plan is to remain here & get help, worse case is to go back to Thailand with her son somehow. The husband is clearly not capable of bringing up the child & my friend is a very responsible good mother.

So shes stuck looking for help, any ideas anyone?

[the scouser]

Has she suffered domestic violence? If so, she may be able to seek indefinite leave to remain on such a basis and should report it to the police, social services, a doctor and perhaps a women's refuge. This may be psychological abuse as well as physical. Failing that, she will have no grounds to remain beyond the end of her two-year visa.

Scouse.

[grandma2jaret]

She must go to the Police. There has been psychological abuse here and the living environment is not one where she or her child should be.

Basically, he really can talk all he likes, but he has not the rights he is telling your friend.

But...she needs to go to Police. She will have to go quickly too. In most places they will move her to a Refuge, from there she can get help.

But, sadly....she must get the courage to do this...but it is the right thing to do.

[vinny]

See also Chapter 8 - Family members, Section 4 - Victims of domestic violence; and

Chapter 8 - Family members annexes, Annex E - Domestic violence - list of police forces and pro-forma letter and Annex AB - List of recognised domestic violence organisations.

Edited December 7, 2007 by vinny

[Mahout Angrit]

If she chooses, or has no option to return to Thailand and she wishes to take her child but the father refuses to co-operate by withholding the child's passport it will not be straightforward to get a Thai passport for the child as it will need permission from the father and the child's Thai birth certificate.

She could however report the child's British passport stolen (which in effect it is) and apply for a replacement (but would need to have it sent to a safe address). Once in Thailand the child's status to remain could be sorted.

As she has only 2 months left on her SV it could get her into a problem with her employer, and as a result put out of work as she needs a valid visa to be working. Working without could get her employers, as well as her, into trouble they would not want. Would her husband not help her to extend her stay if he knew she would be out of work?

In itself it's illegal to be in UK without the required leave to remain but in this case one wonders if she simply overstayed and should she get picked up the situation would at least be brought out in the open and I cant believe even the B & IA would attempt to deport her without her child without at first giving her a voice and involving her husband (however she should remember they cant deport a British citizen).

Overstaying her visa is not recommended but if it takes time to sort herself out then it's unlikely they will prevent her from leaving when she eventually chooses to even if they notice that she is on an overstay as she leaves UK.

[the scouser]

It's a bit of long way off, but the BIA won't seek to remove the parent of a child who has spent seven formative years in the UK.

Scouse.

[connor]

Thanks all

Sounds like she will need to go home, does anyone know about the replacement British Passport? Will she need the birth cert etc, what will she need to get another. I know u can get same day replacement service.

Theres been no violence, basically the guys a waster & thats it really.

[vinny]

See also Replace a lost, stolen or damaged passport.