Thai Manners

[Ulysses G.]

I was working out at the gym today and a bunch of foreigners were on running and eliptical machines in front of a TV with the BBC news on which most were watching while they exercised. A middle-aged Thai woman walked up and put her towel on a running machine and immediately started changing the channel on the TV to Thai programs without a word to anyone.

One farang went ballistic and started going on about people with no manners and got off his machine and left. As soon as he left, she went back to the TV and started changing channels again looking for a better program while ignoring the rest of us.

How would you have handled it?

[ashacat]

This used to happen to me and other farangs when using the gym in my old condo here in Bangkok. I think it's just ignorance to be honest, we used to turn it back!!

[Payboy]

I was working out at the gym today and a bunch of foreigners were on running and eliptical machines in front of a TV with the BBC news on which most were watching while they exercised. A middle-aged Thai woman walked up and put her towel on a running machine and immediately started changing the channel on the TV to Thai programs without a word to anyone.

One farang went ballistic and started going on about people with no manners and got off his machine and left. As soon as he left, she went back to the TV and started changing channels again looking for a better program while ignoring the rest of us.

How would you have handled it?

happens all the time at the gym i use....worst is when they switch to a thai channel and leave or start talking among themselves....that's why i take my ipod for a workout...

[lazeeboy]

fortunatly the gym i use does'nt get any thai's in it ,gyms in a good hotel ,but if they did come in and turn the tv over i would say something for sure

[DamianMavis]

I would have snatched the controller away and changed the channel back. But Im also the guy that bolts out of the BTS full on without turning my shoulders sideways so I can clip all the women trying to rush inside without letting us out first. I try to make them spin as many times as possible before they hit the ground. Good fun.

Damian

[BalthazarBeefheart]

I dont know if I am correct but I have noticed that the Thai Chinese seem to be far more abrupt and lacking in manners. It may be a generalisation but it has been my experience.

Cheers BB

[DP25]

I'd buy a mini remote and use it to secretly change it back. Or just to annoy her once she began watching. Keep changing the volume and the channel so she has to get up over and over again.

[jbowman1993]

I dont know if I am correct but I have noticed that the Thai Chinese seem to be far more abrupt and lacking in manners. It may be a generalisation but it has been my experience.

Cheers BB

Most definitely a blatant generalization...

[dsys]

Would love to say I'd be an alpha male like Damian but to be honest probably just grumble about it, try not to make a scene and keep a stiff upper lip old chap.

god its great to be a Brit stereotype.

edit: just read DP5's post - what a fantastic idea.

Edited February 5, 2008 by dsys

[Maigo6]

Dramatic Title to a Thread about a woman changing TV channels in a gym.

What if I had come into the gym and changed channels, would you have started a thread about it here?

Thai manners are streets ahead of western manners in my opinion.

[kiakaha]

I was working out at the gym today and a bunch of foreigners were on running and eliptical machines in front of a TV with the BBC news on which most were watching while they exercised. A middle-aged Thai woman walked up and put her towel on a running machine and immediately started changing the channel on the TV to Thai programs without a word to anyone.

One farang went ballistic and started going on about people with no manners and got off his machine and left. As soon as he left, she went back to the TV and started changing channels again looking for a better program while ignoring the rest of us.

How would you have handled it?

Probably lack of intelligence on her part, no deliberate malice.

Omni present thought processes that lead to considerate actions are mental faculties general lacking in lesser intelligent members of our species.

[dsys]

@Maigo6

Would you walk into a busy gym where people are obviously watching TV and change the Channel without asking though?

[vegas]

While watching the cricket at the Bus Stop one arvo with a group of about 10 Aussies a chap stood right in front of the TV and reach for the program button to change channels. At the last moment, he turned around to us and said, in a broad north American accent, "Anybody watching this shit?" 10 glaring Aussies gave him the answer. He wandered off muttering something under his breathe.

[Ulysses G.]

I considered walking up and acting all innocent and just changing it - like she had - but I didn't have the balls.

[thaihome]

Manners are a cultural specific behavior. Despite people's attempts to say they are universal, it just ain't so.

One feature of virtually all Asian cultures is that if they don't know you, they don't have to acknowledge you exist and therefore they can ignore you, which, we with our highly developed sense of how even strangers are to be treated, interrupt this to be rudeness. Asian don’t think it is rude since you don’t exist to them. Chinese are well known as the worst for this. When you barge out of the BTS, running into people, it doesn’t teach them any lesson, they don’t give it a second thought.

Westerners in Asia, including myself, find this to be a particularly irritating behavior.

TH

[Ulysses G.]

What if I had come into the gym and changed channels, would you have started a thread about it here?

Certainly, after telling you off.

[siamesekitty]

I dont know if I am correct but I have noticed that the Thai Chinese seem to be far more abrupt and lacking in manners. It may be a generalisation but it has been my experience.

Cheers BB

Most definitely a blatant generalization...

It was a blatant generalization from the very first post! Calling this woman's stupidity "Thai manners", oh come on.... pffft!

[Maigo6]

@Maigo6

Would you walk into a busy gym where people are obviously watching TV and change the Channel without asking though?

Yep, cos I'm hard!

Edited February 5, 2008 by Maigo6

[Maigo6]

Chinese are well known as the worst for this. When you barge out of the BTS, running into people, it doesn’t teach them any lesson, they don’t give it a second thought.

Westerners in Asia, including myself, find this to be a particularly irritating behavior.

TH

I found that in Hong Kong, I couldn't believe how the people act, then I cottoned on that it was normal behaviour for them.

[CarlBkk]

I was working out at the gym today and a bunch of foreigners were on running and eliptical machines in front of a TV with the BBC news on which most were watching while they exercised. A middle-aged Thai woman walked up and put her towel on a running machine and immediately started changing the channel on the TV to Thai programs without a word to anyone.

One farang went ballistic and started going on about people with no manners and got off his machine and left. As soon as he left, she went back to the TV and started changing channels again looking for a better program while ignoring the rest of us.

How would you have handled it?

I would have immediately got off and changed it back right under her nose and stood there for a couple of seconds to make it clear. Make her think a little about the rudeness, possibly embarrass her.

As far as manners here are concerned, one poster generalised by saying it was mainly the Chinese Thais. I have to agree, especially the older generation. With a young son and going on the MRT it's always the following people who never offer their seat: foreign men 50-60, Thai Chinese people 40+, scruffy female Thai market-traders (guess) 40+. Everyone else is aware of their surroundings and offers their seat, especially the office-workers of all ages.

The Thais I've spoke to also say the Thai-Chinese are the rudest. The Thai-Chinese I know also say their own kind (older generation usually) are the rudest. Often the more Chinese, the ruder.

[Furbie]

I would have snatched the controller away and changed the channel back. But Im also the guy that bolts out of the BTS full on without turning my shoulders sideways so I can clip all the women trying to rush inside without letting us out first. I try to make them spin as many times as possible before they hit the ground. Good fun.

Damian

I'm with you 100% - 3 or 4 times getting slammed by people getting off the train will teach most people to get the hel_l out of the way. I have an interesting list of instances where I have used mild force (or caused them to lose face through humor) with our Asian friends to assert my rights, be it in line, channels on a TV in a public space, etc. What I have found is that they will nearly always back down instantly because they know they are being an ass - they just usually get away with it.

As for the gym, I have found gym manners to be deplorable - Thai, Chinese, Koreans, Indians all just as bad - no manners in the locker room and none on the gym floor. @40,000 baht for a membership at a high end hotel usually clears this up - but be weary of hotels that get a lot of Korean or Chinese businessmen.

[pattyboy]

I was working out at the gym today and a bunch of foreigners were on running and eliptical machines in front of a TV with the BBC news on which most were watching while they exercised. A middle-aged Thai woman walked up and put her towel on a running machine and immediately started changing the channel on the TV to Thai programs without a word to anyone.

One farang went ballistic and started going on about people with no manners and got off his machine and left. As soon as he left, she went back to the TV and started changing channels again looking for a better program while ignoring the rest of us.

How would you have handled it?

Probably lack of intelligence on her part, no deliberate malice.

Omni present thought processes that lead to considerate actions are mental faculties general lacking in lesser intelligent members of our species.

I'll probably get slammed badly for this but, I feel that many Thais DO often show a lack of consideration for others, and I've always wondered if it's a matter of them not being aware of their actions or if it's just their nature. This is not meant to be criticism -- just an observation. Deep down, I suspect it's more a matter of what's socially acceptable in Thai culture isn't acceptable where I come from.

Hopefully, I won't hear the typical "If you think they're so bad, why don't you leave" comments. Instead, it would be nice to hear people tell us about some of their experiences and offer some opinions on the subject without it turning into a Thai (or pattyboy) bashing thread. (If I thought Thai people were so bad, I would have left this country years ago.)

[meadish_sweetball]

Manners are a cultural specific behavior. Despite people's attempts to say they are universal, it just ain't so.

One feature of virtually all Asian cultures is that if they don't know you, they don't have to acknowledge you exist and therefore they can ignore you, which, we with our highly developed sense of how even strangers are to be treated, interrupt this to be rudeness. Asian don't think it is rude since you don't exist to them. Chinese are well known as the worst for this. When you barge out of the BTS, running into people, it doesn't teach them any lesson, they don't give it a second thought.

Westerners in Asia, including myself, find this to be a particularly irritating behavior.

TH

I think that is an important piece of the puzzle, although as all generalizations it can only take one so far.

[jaiyenyen]

I considered walking up and acting all innocent and just changing it - like she had - but I didn't have the balls.

So, Ulysses, you admit that a Thai woman has bigger ball's than you?

Best thing to do is avoid gym's altogether and become a fat bast@rd

[Furbie]

Manners are a cultural specific behavior. Despite people's attempts to say they are universal, it just ain't so.

One feature of virtually all Asian cultures is that if they don't know you, they don't have to acknowledge you exist and therefore they can ignore you, which, we with our highly developed sense of how even strangers are to be treated, interrupt this to be rudeness. Asian don't think it is rude since you don't exist to them. Chinese are well known as the worst for this. When you barge out of the BTS, running into people, it doesn't teach them any lesson, they don't give it a second thought.

Westerners in Asia, including myself, find this to be a particularly irritating behavior.

TH

I think that is an important piece of the puzzle, although as all generalizations it can only take one so far.

Of course, the flaw in the theory is that if you ask a Thai what they think about being cut in line, or how they would feel if someone turned the channel on something they were watching, they would have a very negative view on the behavior.

I suggest that a willingness to engage in such behavior and a society that is willing to let it go does not mean they don't find the behavior rude – or as my GF would say "ugly or disgusting behavior". Put me on a flight to Hong Kong and watch how many people I will cut in line. Put me on a flight from Chicago to New York and watch how well I line up. The difference, I know someone in the US would challenge me cutting them, while on the way to Hong Kong no one says a word.

My view is that Thais are just as upset by such behavior (I am yet to speak with a Thai who believes it is good manners or correct to do such things). The problem from our perspective is they are far less likely to do something about it – which is all the incentive most people need to behave in a rude manner - myself included.

[cmsally]

I'll probably get slammed badly for this but, I feel that many Thais DO often show a lack of consideration for others, and I've always wondered if it's a matter of them not being aware of their actions or if it's just their nature. This is not meant to be criticism -- just an observation. Deep down, I suspect it's more a matter of what's socially acceptable in Thai culture isn't acceptable where I come from.

Hopefully, I won't hear the typical "If you think they're so bad, why don't you leave" comments. Instead, it would be nice to hear people tell us about some of their experiences and offer some opinions on the subject without it turning into a Thai (or pattyboy) bashing thread. (If I thought Thai people were so bad, I would have left this country years ago.)

Firstly, I would say that unless I was there and had a look at the Thai woman , difficult to say what I would have done.

One wonders if she would have had the guts to change it if it was a group of Thai men watching it.

But often you find people behave like this because they get away with it.

I find being overly polite mixed with some sarcasm usually helps. As long as they get the message what they are doing is not acceptable.

Most Thai men I know would have been far more direct and to the point though and it is very probable she wouldn't have changed it in front of them.

[tutsiwarrior]

(sigh) better to stay at home, drink vodka an' watch Daffy Duck cartoons with the niece...

[samtam]

If you think someone's behaved incorrectly you must tell them. How you do that is important. But to grumble about it afterwards is a bit wimpy.

[lannarebirth]

I dont know if I am correct but I have noticed that the Thai Chinese seem to be far more abrupt and lacking in manners. It may be a generalisation but it has been my experience.

Cheers BB

Most definitely a blatant generalization...

Yes, it's a blatant generalization. The more apt blatant generalization would have been "affluent Thais", rather than "Thai Chinese". Though most affluent Thais happen to be Thai Chinese.

[TheDon]

If I was there, I would of MADE you change the channel for me to what ever I wanted to watch