Why Is It So Hard To Have Foreign Friends Without The Intimate Relationship?

[MidoriApple]

Well Midori... a couple of things here...

1. You should at least be pleased that farang guys are ASKING you for sex as opposed to NOT asking..... Think of it as a compliment....

2. I have and keep a number of different Thai female friends here in BKK where we comfortably have ongoing non-sexual relationships.

For me, as a single man, GFs may come and go (such is life and romance), but my women Thai friends and I stay in touch and together because we like each other, feel comfortable together, and typically have some history together...

When you're dating, it's typically a much more regular schedule of meeting and going out... But for my platonic friends, it's more sporadic... We may not get together for a month or two... But when we do, it's just picking up like nothing happened in the meantime......

JF.... I should be pleased? Nah.... if been asked frequently and it turned to be disaster , you will not feel happy..

For me, I feel like a nightmare...

Well, just recently, I had been in this disaster and I don't know if it was just a joke or anything worse.

Taken some time staying all alone to figure out what was so wrong..... I couldn't.

I am fine now, can smile as usual but I see the world in different way after that.

Is not clear and bright... I see foreigners with different feeling.

I guess I have lost the capable of my instinct to feel who is gud or ghost...

A decent, good profession, and mature one can become evil... this was more than expected.

I was phobia to foreigners for quite a while, so have dropped down all the rest friends...also Thai

Right ..JF, the longtime companion is worth... I know I need this.

Just an uncertain feeling in mind, it might be my mistake, or I was too conservative?

I am deciding, should I quit or move on the rest of friendships?

So....Here comes the question...

[MidoriApple]

This is the funny thing I have noticed. If a guy can keep he's cool then the girl will be impressed by his behavior and then start to gain interest in him..

You know its true!!!!!!!!!!!

It is my thinking as well, Torlae....

A disaster if we unintentionally lost to this taboo...

Too awkward to go on the friendship... I really hate this feeling..

[MidoriApple]

Seriously, if you are NOt interested in the person romantically and he/she to you, you could just end up being friends. No other way.

Or maybe, if you are already secure in a relationship, find someone who is also in the same situation. You will be just great friends.

Hope that helps! Good luck!

Seriously , will be quited before I quit, always feel depressed...either way

Is really hard to find the perfect platonic one...

[lioness]

I have been in Thailand some years, 95% of my friends are Thai men, they are mates, we go fishing, swimming and sometimes shopping or a meal, sometimes their wives or girlfriends come along and sometimes they don't. I am now married to a Thai man, if time allows he joins us, I still have my mates.

Being a woman I much prefer the company of men, and no they don't put the hard word on me. It is possible to have opposite gender friends.

[Plus]

Check platonic craigslist:

http://bangkok.craigslist.co.th/search/stp/?query=w4m

I wouldn't mind having a platonic friendship with a Thai woman, but not with any of those girls. Sorry.

"We friend! I tell you Isaan culture, we talk, listen thai music, go temple, MBK, Gaysorn."

See what I mean?

[kmart]

Best place to meet foreign men for platonic friendships only is probably outside the Prostate Ward of a good hospital.

[Edonista]

Midori, let's put this down straight: there is no way you can get to a man's wallet without allowing him to get to your pussy.

[MetroGirl]

Seriously, to the OP here

It's very eaaaaaasy to have a platonic relationship with the opposite sex. All you have to do is.....

Find someone you're not attracted to sexually, have some type of common interest, and just talk to them, ask questions, treat them like you would a friend of the same sex to a certain extent

Edited October 15, 2008 by MetroGirl

[bkkjames]

Seriously, to the OP here

It's very eaaaaaasy to have a platonic relationship with the opposite sex. All you have to do is.....

Find someone you're not attracted to sexually, have some type of common interest, and just talk to them, ask questions, treat them like you would a friend of the same sex to a certain extent

I guess this is why we will never be friends.

[jfchandler]

JF.... I should be pleased? Nah.... if been asked frequently and it turned to be disaster , you will not feel happy..

For me, I feel like a nightmare...

Well, just recently, I had been in this disaster and I don't know if it was just a joke or anything worse.

Taken some time staying all alone to figure out what was so wrong..... I couldn't.

I am fine now, can smile as usual but I see the world in different way after that.

Is not clear and bright... I see foreigners with different feeling.

I guess I have lost the capable of my instinct to feel who is gud or ghost...

A decent, good profession, and mature one can become evil... this was more than expected.

I was phobia to foreigners for quite a while, so have dropped down all the rest friends...also Thai

Right ..JF, the longtime companion is worth... I know I need this.

Just an uncertain feeling in mind, it might be my mistake, or I was too conservative?

I am deciding, should I quit or move on the rest of friendships?

So....Here comes the question...

Midori...everyone goes thru bad experiences sometimes with the opposite sex... I think everyone (man and woman) has had the feeling you talk about above, with utter dismay in the wake of some relationship gone bad... So take some comfort in that... You're not alone.

About sex, everyone has the right to decide when and if it's right for them...with another person. If you're not ready or not interested with some particular person, then it's your right to say so...and the other person needs to respect that. If they can't respect that, then it's a good sign it's someone not worth your time.

I hope you don't generalize one or some bad experiences with farang to all farang, because not everyone's the same. Just the same as a farang man ought not generalize about Thai women, thinking that all have the same manners as bar girls, because of course, they do not.

Don't become a hermit...just because some things have gone bad...

[MidoriApple]

Midori, let's put this down straight: there is no way you can get to a man's wallet without allowing him to get to your pussy.

What????

Umm.... Edonista...I'm not sure what do you mean?

Btw, Thanks for the advice..though it was bluntly said but too difficult to understand..

Sorry that English in not my native language, I am trying my best to know what you have said about.

wallet+pussy+friend = ???

wallet+pussy+ prostitute = satisfaction

I guess wallet+pussy can go very well with prostitute... Am I right?

I don't mind if my friend has big bucks in his wallet to get pros's pussy, I do mind only if it is my wallet !!!

Cheers..

[Lorin]

Best place to meet foreign men for platonic friendships only is probably outside the Prostate Ward of a good hospital.

Well said...

[MidoriApple]

Midori...everyone goes thru bad experiences sometimes with the opposite sex... I think everyone (man and woman) has had the feeling you talk about above, with utter dismay in the wake of some relationship gone bad... So take some comfort in that... You're not alone.

About sex, everyone has the right to decide when and if it's right for them...with another person. If you're not ready or not interested with some particular person, then it's your right to say so...and the other person needs to respect that. If they can't respect that, then it's a good sign it's someone not worth your time.

I hope you don't generalize one or some bad experiences with farang to all farang, because not everyone's the same. Just the same as a farang man ought not generalize about Thai women, thinking that all have the same manners as bar girls, because of course, they do not.

Don't become a hermit...just because some things have gone bad...

Thanks JF, such a nice comforting you have done to me!!!

I am really fine, so far. Just need to be more carefully count on people around.

[thesunset75]

Dont be depress you'll have more friends who not only want sex

For me I only have foriegners malefriends and only Thai female friends when I was in BKK.

Thai guys were off side

Have a nice day.

Sunset

[zaza]

Best place to meet foreign men for platonic friendships only is probably outside the Prostate Ward of a good hospital.

HONEY ;can you remind me of when is your own hospital appointment to start off our platonic friendship

[zaza]

Check platonic craigslist:

http://bangkok.craigslist.co.th/search/stp/?query=w4m

I wouldn't mind having a platonic friendship with a Thai woman, but not with any of those girls. Sorry.

"We friend! I tell you Isaan culture, we talk, listen thai music, go temple, MBK, Gaysorn."

See what I mean?

oh la la Gaysorn,eh?

[kmart]

Best place to meet foreign men for platonic friendships only is probably outside the Prostate Ward of a good hospital.

HONEY ;can you remind me of when is your own hospital appointment to start off our platonic friendship

You can check my prostate if you want.

[zaza]

Best place to meet foreign men for platonic friendships only is probably outside the Prostate Ward of a good hospital.

HONEY ;can you remind me of when is your own hospital appointment to start off our platonic friendship

You can check my prostate if you want.

come on!

but If I would check it ;I will castrate it if am not satisfied with it's function.

[zaza]

I am not beautiful nor smart woman,

well honey,from this post and the other ones that you had posted after it,which you had stated the "frequent" end to all-and-so-many farang-friendships that you have had ;

THAT urges me to ask you kindly : can you tell us, please; what is your secret to attract those men from the start,since you are not pretty nor a smart? don't tell me it's the charisma thing if so why others had disappeared?

[bkkjames]

I am not beautiful nor smart woman,

well honey,from this post and the other ones that you had posted after it,which you had stated the "frequent" end to all-and-so-many farang-friendships that you have had ;

THAT urges me to ask you kindly : can you tell us, please; what is your secret to attract those men from the start,since you are not pretty nor a smart? don't tell me it's the charisma thing if so why others had disappeared?

Well judging by his/her avatar, it must the hummer she/drives or the one's she provides.

[MidoriApple]

I am not beautiful nor smart woman,

well honey,from this post and the other ones that you had posted after it,which you had stated the "frequent" end to all-and-so-many farang-friendships that you have had ;

THAT urges me to ask you kindly : can you tell us, please; what is your secret to attract those men from the start,since you are not pretty nor a smart? don't tell me it's the charisma thing if so why others had disappeared?

Hi, zaza... your question sounded irony to me....

Come on..dear, I don't have any "secret" or "how-to strategy" to attract "your those men", I do as ordinary people do.

2people meet >>> talk >>> feel >>> if they have same interest >>> so they can get along with.

To friend, I am being myself naturally, it's too much work to do to pretend to be someone else all the way. I really can't be that smart.

By the way..zaza, I don't have SO-MANY-FARANG-FRIENDSHIPS as you have overstated I am

so it is impossible to FREQUENTLY ended up gone, and I have never said I have been gone "ALL"

Said "beautiful" and "smart", just to support the idea of "Thailand seems to be well-known of having beautiful Asian girls and sex tourisms"

so no need to be beautiful or smart, just being Thai woman....so easy to attract foreigners

To be blunt, I do mean >> "Maybe all Thai girls for the foreigners are for having fun...."

Cheers,

[bkkjames]

I am not beautiful nor smart woman,

well honey,from this post and the other ones that you had posted after it,which you had stated the "frequent" end to all-and-so-many farang-friendships that you have had ;

THAT urges me to ask you kindly : can you tell us, please; what is your secret to attract those men from the start,since you are not pretty nor a smart? don't tell me it's the charisma thing if so why others had disappeared?

Hi, zaza... your question sounded irony to me....

Come on..dear, I don't have any "secret" or "how-to strategy" to attract "your those men", I do as ordinary people do.

2people meet >>> talk >>> feel >>> if they have same interest >>> so they can get along with.

To friend, I am being myself naturally, it's too much work to do to pretend to be someone else all the way. I really can't be that smart.

By the way..zaza, I don't have SO-MANY-FARANG-FRIENDSHIPS as you have overstated I am

so it is impossible to FREQUENTLY ended up gone, and I have never said I have been gone "ALL"

Said "beautiful" and "smart", just to support the idea of "Thailand seems to be well-known of having beautiful Asian girls and sex tourisms"

so no need to be beautiful or smart, just being Thai woman....so easy to attract foreigners

To be blunt, I do mean >> "Maybe all Thai girls for the foreigners are for having fun...."

Cheers,

I don't know what sex tourisms means - but you now have my attention.

[Huey]

Thats a common thing in allot of cultures I would even go so far as to say that is simply the norm for humanity as a whole that cross gender relationships are viewed being valid for something more intimate, and avoided for strictly platonic relationships. So best thing to do is befriend a foreign woman or if you just got to have a foreign male friend, take a page from my Grandmomma's book, she always said "A sissy man is a woman's best friend.." heh

[scotwumman]

Agree with your grandmomma Huey having five brothers, no sisters, have always related better to men in my book for friendship. It is always

viewed as something more sinister however and that is even here in a cold country, how much more difficult it must be for Midora in exotic Thailand.

[Kerryd]

Have many Thai ladies who happen to be my mate and mate only. Not every western lad is looking for a shag, some of us are interested in having a mate and leave the romantic/shagging to our gf or wife.

I suggest anyone who drops a mate after given the redlight towards a shag well isn't your mate after all and you are better off without them.

I ain't shagging you no matter how sexy you look in your Jenny's outfit !

(Can we still be mates ?)

I find it hard to have a platonic relationship with a girl here, especially if I have a g/f at the time. One always seems suspicious of the other, and no manner of explanation ever seems to convince them otherwise. If I'm not being accused of sleeping with the other girl, I'm being accused of wanting to sleep with her.

Sheesh, a couple days ago, shortly after getting home, my landlady came to knock on the door and drop off some mail. My "friend" immediately made remarks about me having another woman on the side. Jumpin' Jimminey, I'd only been home for less than 2 hours and I'm already guilty (in her eyes) of screwing around on her !

(I said to h3ll with it, looked her in the eyes and told her that yes, I had scheduled a few female friends to come over, 1 each hour for the rest of the afternoon, and she was cutting in to #2's time by not leaving. When the landlady's shadow passed by the window a few minutes later, she believed me !).

[jfchandler]

so no need to be beautiful or smart, just being Thai woman....so easy to attract foreigners

No, I only socialize with women who are smart, beautiful and Thai... thank you!!!

[bkkjames]

so no need to be beautiful or smart, just being Thai woman....so easy to attract foreigners

No, I only socialize with women who are smart, beautiful and Thai... thank you!!!

SO you are the one who has been seeing my wife on the side JFC!

[jfchandler]

Can you come home a bit late tonight, please... James???

Much appreciated.... JFC.

[MidoriApple]

Well...I guess I can make decision (to quit or move on) right now ..

Foreigners... are too much complicated!!! I am too much headache..

Cheers,

[jfchandler]

NOW.... you know how WE feel about Thai women!!!!

There's an old saying..I assume American.... that goes like this...

(Thai) Women.... Can't live with 'em.... Can't live without 'em....

Edited October 16, 2008 by jfchandler