Popular Post laislica Posted February 10, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 10, 2016 Google earth gives us the ability to see every place on earth but, what do we do? We go and find our house. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Muzarella Posted February 10, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 10, 2016 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post laislica Posted February 10, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 10, 2016 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luk AJ Posted February 10, 2016 Share Posted February 10, 2016 Hey ladies and gents, I really enjoy your jokes........555555555555555555555 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Ron19 Posted February 10, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 10, 2016 Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced: 'Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to Toronto . The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So sit back, relax and..... OH, MY GOD !' Silence followed! Some moments later the captain came back on the intercom. 'Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry if I scared you . While I was talking to you, a flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!' One Irish passenger yelled... 'For <deleted>'s sake ........ you should see the Back of mine!!!' 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Ron19 Posted February 11, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 11, 2016 -What do you call a blonde in a closet?-Last year's hide and seek champion. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob13 Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Did you hear about the 2 pollacks that froze to death at the drive-in theater? They were waiting to watch "Closed For The Season" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post laislica Posted February 11, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 11, 2016 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daffy D Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 asIgrowOlder.jpg I know that feeling 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post laislica Posted February 12, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 12, 2016 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post laislica Posted February 12, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 12, 2016 RIP the dinosaurs. Can't believe it's 65 million years already.Always in my thoughts 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post laislica Posted February 12, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 12, 2016 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post laislica Posted February 12, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 12, 2016 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilsonandson Posted February 13, 2016 Share Posted February 13, 2016 Happy Valentine's Day! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Rob13 Posted February 14, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 14, 2016 Three engineers got into a car. The car won't start. The mechanical engineer says; 'It's the starter.' The electrical engineer says; No, it's the battery' The IT engineer says; 'Guys, let's all get out of the car and get back in again.' 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post sandmike Posted February 14, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 14, 2016 Or you could have opened the windows and closed them again .... 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ron19 Posted February 14, 2016 Share Posted February 14, 2016 A painter, whitewashing the inner walls of a countryouthouse, had the misfortune to fall through the opening andland in the muck at the bottom.He shouted, "Fire! Fire! Fire!" at the top of his lungs.The local fire department responded with alacrity, sirensroaring as they approached the privy."Where's the fire?" called the chief."No fire," replied the painter as they pulled him out of thehole. "But if I had yelled, 'Shit! Shit! Shit!', whowould have rescued me?" 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ozsamurai Posted February 14, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 14, 2016 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Crossy Posted February 15, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 15, 2016 Geek alert! 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ron19 Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 (edited) There was this guy who lost one of his arms in an accident. He became very depressed because he couldn't imagine life without playing music, sports and all the other things that he took for granted. One day he could not stand it anymore and decided to commit suicide. He got on an elevator and went to the top of a tall building to jump off. He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man on the sidewalk below skipping along whistling and kicking up his heels. He looked closer and noticed this man didn't have any arms at all. He started thinking, what am I doing up here feeling sorry for myself, I still have one good arm to do things with. There goes a man with no arms skipping down the sidewalk happy and going on with his life. He hurried down and caught the man with no arms. He told him how glad he was to see him because he had lost one of his arms and felt ugly, useless and was going to kill himself. He thanked him again for saving his life and he now knew he could make it with one arm if that guy could do it with no arms. The man with no arms continued dancing and whistling and kicking up his heels. He asked "Why are you so happy anyway?" He said "I'm NOT happy, you one-armed ! My ass itches." Edited February 16, 2016 by Ron19 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Ron19 Posted February 16, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 16, 2016 THE MIRACLE OF A SHEET OF TOILET PAPER Fresh from my shower, I stood in front of the mirror complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small.Instead of romantically telling me this is not true, heuncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion: 'If you want your breasts to grow,then take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds 3 times every day.'Willing to try anything, I got a piece of toilet paper and stood in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts.'How long will this take?' I asked. 'They will grow larger over a period of years,' my husband replies.I stopped. 'Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts 3 times every day will make my breasts larger over the years?'Without missing a beat he said, 'Worked for your bum, didn't it?'The idiot is still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk again although he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw.Stupid, stupid man...... 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Crossy Posted February 17, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 17, 2016 The content of the HTML file. The Talking Centipede A single guy decided life would be more funif he had a pet.So he went to the pet storeand told the ownerthat he wanted to buy an unusual pet.After some discussion,he finally bought a talking centipede,which came in a little white boxto use for his house.He took the box back home,found a good spot for the box,and decided he would start offby taking his new petto the pub for a drink with him.So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to godown the pub with me today?We will have a good time."But there was no answerfrom his new pet.This bothered him a bit,but he waited a few minutesand then asked again, "How about goingdown the pub with me ?"But again,there was no answerfrom his new friend and pet.So he waiteda few minutes more,thinking about the situation.The guy decidedto invite the centipedeone last time.This time heput his face up againstthe centipede ' s box and shouted, "Hey, in there!Would you like to gotothe pub with me? ..... This time, a little voice came out of the box, "I heard you the first time!I 'm putting my shoes on!" 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ron19 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 The content of the HTML file. The Talking Centipede A single guy decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a talking centipede, which came in a little white box to use for his house. He took the box back home, found a good spot for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the pub for a drink with him. So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to godown the pub with me today? We will have a good time." But there was no answer from his new pet. This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked again, "How about going down the pub with me ?" But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. The guy decided to invite the centipede one last time. This time he put his face up against the centipede ' s box and shouted, "Hey, in there!Would you like to go to the pub with me? ..... This time, a little voice came out of the box, "I heard you the first time! I 'm putting my shoes on!" How did you do that ? Was it just a simple copy and paste ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jai Dee Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 The content of the HTML file. <snipped> How did you do that ? Was it just a simple copy and paste ? Yes... simply open the HTML file in your browser and copy/paste the contents. You need to be careful with this, and you might accidentally release some personal information (like your email address) within the pasted HTML file. I will go back and remove that file now. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilsonandson Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 (edited) red yellow blue green http://www.bbcode.org/examples/?id=6 Edited February 17, 2016 by Wilsonandson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laislica Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Of course I won’t laugh said the nurse. I'm a professional.In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."Okay then," said Bob, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the smallest male part the nurse had ever seen. In length and width was almost identical to a AAA battery.Unable to control herself, the nurse tried to stop a giggle, but it just came out. Feeling Very badly that she had laughed at the man's part, she composed herself as well as she could. "I am so sorry," she said.I don't know what came over me. On my honour as a nurse and a lady, I promise that it won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems o be the problem?" "It’s swollen/' Bob replied.She ran out of the room. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post laislica Posted February 17, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 17, 2016 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ron19 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 -What do a dwarf and a midget have in common?-Very little. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davidhen Posted February 18, 2016 Share Posted February 18, 2016 Please can anyone tell me if it is possible, when navigating a subject (such as "worst joke ever") with many pages, to go to a specific page instead of trawling through from beginning to end, or vice verse. Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laislica Posted February 18, 2016 Share Posted February 18, 2016 Please can anyone tell me if it is possible, when navigating a subject (such as "worst joke ever") with many pages, to go to a specific page instead of trawling through from beginning to end, or vice verse. Thank you. Yes 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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