Domestic Violence In Thailand

[tuky]

One of my ex-colleagues is still being hounded by an ex-boyfreind, 6 years after leaving him. He regualrly threatens to kill her. I don't think the Thai male takes rejection very well. Must be something related to losing face. I know of another similar story so it surely isn't an isolated case.

My ex-wife regularly threatens to kill me. And worse.

isanb[/b]]I'm sorry but when we read ur first post all the people who live in thailand knows that there is 95% (and i'm optimistic) of chance that it is a scam.

Hope for you that ur in the 5% remaining.

isanb I think you have your numbers inverse. If anyone could be cynical about this it could be me (if you knew my experience). However what would all your answers be if the OP hadn't mentioned the 700k baht?

Mention money and Thai girl in the same sentence and it 95% has to be a scam? <deleted>?

[Frezie]

I am dismayed at the responses (except for the pm I got which answered my question). I've know her since 2005 (we were friends). She worked at a legit spa in Saipan, a US Territory. I have been romantically involved with her since July 2007 (just about two years). This is a serious relationship. I will admit it's an odd situation; however, it is what it is and there is no need to justify it or explain it...this was basically the hand I was dealt.

It looks like i've wasted my time here since most people are afraid of getting scammed or are cynical . Are we all so jaded that we can't take serious postings seriously or think that thai women are always trying to scam farangs? I was joking about her faking her death. Based on the length of the relationship, I would hope that I have a good feel for who she is.

Don't be,

I'm sorry but when we read ur first post all the people who live in thailand knows that there is 95% (and i'm optimistic) of chance that it is a scam.

Hope for you that ur in the 5% remaining.

Believe me,we are not afraid of getting scammed or cynical, we just living everyday in thailand.

I really wish you all the best but has you said : "it's an odd situation"

Like almost all posters in this rhread, I am very cynical about your situation.

However on the bright side I recently lent a girl 400,000 baht to enable her to get an Australian visa to attend language school there. As soon as she got the visa she pestered me every day for my bank details so she could repay me. It seemed she felt very uneasy about that much being in her account.

I have known her for 3 years and we have become really good mates all that time. Not really the gf any more but I hope we will be friends for the rest of my life. Not hers - she's 40 years my junior

Just proves that there are some good ones out there and hopefully one of them is yours

[isanb]

One of my ex-colleagues is still being hounded by an ex-boyfreind, 6 years after leaving him. He regualrly threatens to kill her. I don't think the Thai male takes rejection very well. Must be something related to losing face. I know of another similar story so it surely isn't an isolated case.

My ex-wife regularly threatens to kill me. And worse.

isanb[/b]]I'm sorry but when we read ur first post all the people who live in thailand knows that there is 95% (and i'm optimistic) of chance that it is a scam.

Hope for you that ur in the 5% remaining.

isanb I think you have your numbers inverse. If anyone could be cynical about this it could be me (if you knew my experience). However what would all your answers be if the OP hadn't mentioned the 700k baht?

Mention money and Thai girl in the same sentence and it 95% has to be a scam? <deleted>?

Of course the 700k baht is a major hint but if you read the 1 post of the OP(see below) :

- The ex-boyfiend relationship ended in 2004 but she has sex with him till 2006 and the last trip the ex-boyfriend still wonder why she doesn't have sex with him

so when did really ended the relationship ? (if it's really ended otherwise why is he still asking to have sex).

- The ex-boyfriend worked in the OP gf parents farm but he cried all day and said he hates their daughter .

Strange parents to allow someone who hate their daughter to work on their farm.(even in isaan)

- She didn't tell him about the Farang (so you have to assume that she didn't tell the parents also otherwise he will know).

The OP and her are involved in a serious relationship and she never bring him to met her parents in isaan and she doesn't talk about him either

-The OP think that because he did apply for a fiancee visa there is no reason for her to lie.

On this one i think i don't have to make any comments

So yes for me there are enough "red lights" even without talking about the money to make my previous comment.

And anyway the OP is an adult i hope he will make is own choices and it's not a forum witch will influence his life (but he asked for our advises)

and as i said i wish him all the best

"

My gf told me that her ex-boyfriend has moved from Isaan to Bangkok. He's a leech and a drunk. She said that her ex may look for her and try to kill her. I don't want to get into the details, but suffice it to say, their relationship ended in 2004 (before she met me). She only sees him when she visits her parents since he helps on their farm. This last trip he asked her why she doesn't have sex with him (since 2006) whenever she visits (which is only 2-3 times a year since she works to help the family). She told him she doesn't love him and doesn't want to marry him. She didn't tell him about me. Her parents said he cried all day and said he hates her. He is now coming down to Bangkok to find work. She is afraid that he will try to find her and hurt/kill her. He doesn't know where she lives, but he does know where she works....ps. in April I did apply for a fiancee visa so there is no reason for her to lie to me about this incident unless she's plotting to fake her own death so she can walk away with the 700,000 baht I just wired her for a house we are building in Pak Chong (of course if I think that, I shouldn't be in this relationship)......

How common is domestic violence among Thai only couples compared to the US..... "

[IanForbes]

Like almost all posters in this rhread, I am very cynical about your situation.

However on the bright side I recently lent a girl 400,000 baht to enable her to get an Australian visa to attend language school there. As soon as she got the visa she pestered me every day for my bank details so she could repay me. It seemed she felt very uneasy about that much being in her account.

I have known her for 3 years and we have become really good mates all that time. Not really the gf any more but I hope we will be friends for the rest of my life. Not hers - she's 40 years my junior

Just proves that there are some good ones out there and hopefully one of them is yours

Good post, Frezie. I agree with you. There are lots of good honest women in Thailand that just need a little help to get ahead. But, we all know there are others not so trustworthy and it pays to use a little caution.

I'm glad you were able to help your friend and it's quite likely you will remain friends. I have similar relationships with a few Thai women. They ask for nothing, but I do often treat them while asking for nothing in return.

[loong]

Like almost all posters in this rhread, I am very cynical about your situation.

However on the bright side I recently lent a girl 400,000 baht to enable her to get an Australian visa to attend language school there. As soon as she got the visa she pestered me every day for my bank details so she could repay me. It seemed she felt very uneasy about that much being in her account.

I have known her for 3 years and we have become really good mates all that time. Not really the gf any more but I hope we will be friends for the rest of my life. Not hers - she's 40 years my junior

Just proves that there are some good ones out there and hopefully one of them is yours

Good post, Frezie. I agree with you. There are lots of good honest women in Thailand that just need a little help to get ahead. But, we all know there are others not so trustworthy and it pays to use a little caution.

I'm glad you were able to help your friend and it's quite likely you will remain friends. I have similar relationships with a few Thai women. They ask for nothing, but I do often treat them while asking for nothing in return.

Just in the interest of balance, is this an example of a good honest woman?

I have no idea what the requirements are to get a visa to study in Australia, but from the post I assume that it is necessary to prove that you have money, otherwise why did she need to borrow 400K?

So did she borrow the cash in order to mislead the Australian authorities to obtain the visa? If so, not the actions of a good honest woman.

[Frezie]

Like almost all posters in this rhread, I am very cynical about your situation.

However on the bright side I recently lent a girl 400,000 baht to enable her to get an Australian visa to attend language school there. As soon as she got the visa she pestered me every day for my bank details so she could repay me. It seemed she felt very uneasy about that much being in her account.

I have known her for 3 years and we have become really good mates all that time. Not really the gf any more but I hope we will be friends for the rest of my life. Not hers - she's 40 years my junior

Just proves that there are some good ones out there and hopefully one of them is yours

Good post, Frezie. I agree with you. There are lots of good honest women in Thailand that just need a

little help to get ahead. But, we all know there are others not so trustworthy and it pays to use a little caution.

I'm glad you were able to help your friend and it's quite likely you will remain friends. I have similar relationships with a few Thai women. They ask for nothing, but I do often treat them while asking for nothing in return.

Just in the interest of balance, is this an example of a good honest woman?

I have no idea what the requirements are to get a visa to study in Australia, but from the post I assume that it is necessary to prove that you have money, otherwise why did she need to borrow 400K?

So did she borrow the cash in order to mislead the Australian authorities to obtain the visa? If so, not the actions of a good honest woman.

Lighten up Toong, somebody want's to work at improving her life. By the way she recently renewed her visa out there with no problem by having 7,000 aus dollars in the bank so where's the harm done.

[IanForbes]

Just in the interest of balance, is this an example of a good honest woman?

I have no idea what the requirements are to get a visa to study in Australia, but from the post I assume that it is necessary to prove that you have money, otherwise why did she need to borrow 400K?

So did she borrow the cash in order to mislead the Australian authorities to obtain the visa? If so, not the actions of a good honest woman.

Seeing how the "authorities" bend the rules to suit their OWN agenda, I don't see any harm in someone bending the same rules to gain a bit of an advantage if there is no intention to commit any crime. It is like the arbitrary 50 km speed limit when there is no traffic and no danger by exceeding that speed limit by 10 km/hour. Yes, technically you are breaking the law, but what is the law there for in the first place?

[Moonrakers]

ps. in April I did apply for a fiancee visa so there is no reason for her to lie to me about this incident unless she's plotting to fake her own death so she can walk away with the 700,000 baht I just wired her for a house we are building in Pak Chong (of course if I think that, I shouldn't be in this relationship)......

How common is domestic violence among Thai only couples compared to the US.....

<deleted> is a fiancee visa? Never heard of one.

Pak Chong would be where her family live? (A guess). Boyfriend works (lives?) with family yet knows nothing of her relationship with you? A new house is about to be built to the tune of 700k, and yet the boyfriend knows nothing of this or at least ha no idea of where the money is coming from?

Just a couple of things that don't add up for starters?

[Moonrakers]

A post by the OP in another thread:

Violet Fonce....I'm with ya!

I just got engaged in Bangkok so I could take pictures for the K-1 Visa process. I gave the parents 50,000 baht as a down payment on the sin sod.

Early in the relationship, she told me 200,000 baht. Her mom asked for 300,000 baht. She told her mom she loves me and that I only have to pay 200,000 and for the extra 100,000, she will work when she comes here and give it to her....

I also only have to cough up 5 baht of gold.

Stats, girl from Issan, one 6yo son, BA degree from Mahidol University (I paid for 50% about 5K)

You know...in the long run, if it's true love, the amount of sin sod you pay is irrelevant...

[G54]

A post by the OP in another thread:

Violet Fonce....I'm with ya!

I just got engaged in Bangkok so I could take pictures for the K-1 Visa process. I gave the parents 50,000 baht as a down payment on the sin sod.

Early in the relationship, she told me 200,000 baht. Her mom asked for 300,000 baht. She told her mom she loves me and that I only have to pay 200,000 and for the extra 100,000, she will work when she comes here and give it to her....

I also only have to cough up 5 baht of gold.

Stats, girl from Issan, one 6yo son, BA degree from Mahidol University (I paid for 50% about 5K)

You know...in the long run, if it's true love, the amount of sin sod you pay is irrelevant...

Sigh .... another one.

On Topic :-

Does a wife beating a drunken husband with a stick all the way home count as domestic violence in Thailand? If it does, I have witnessed DV a few times

[isanb]

Does a wife beating a drunken husband with a stick all the way home count as domestic violence in Thailand? If it does, I have witnessed DV a few times

yes i she don't let him finish the bottle before

Otherwise no, it's just a bad habit they catch by bringing the buffalos home everydays

[G54]

Does a wife beating a drunken husband with a stick all the way home count as domestic violence in Thailand? If it does, I have witnessed DV a few times

yes i she don't let him finish the bottle before

Otherwise no, it's just a bad habit they catch by bringing the buffalos home everydays

Then do I feel sorry for the buffaloes or the drunken husband?

Ever noticed it is the large woman beating the small, skinny guy with a stick?

[tuky]

One of my ex-colleagues is still being hounded by an ex-boyfreind, 6 years after leaving him. He regualrly threatens to kill her. I don't think the Thai male takes rejection very well. Must be something related to losing face. I know of another similar story so it surely isn't an isolated case.

My ex-wife regularly threatens to kill me. And worse.

isanb[/b]]I'm sorry but when we read ur first post all the people who live in thailand knows that there is 95% (and i'm optimistic) of chance that it is a scam.

Hope for you that ur in the 5% remaining.

isanb I think you have your numbers inverse. If anyone could be cynical about this it could be me (if you knew my experience). However what would all your answers be if the OP hadn't mentioned the 700k baht?

Mention money and Thai girl in the same sentence and it 95% has to be a scam? <deleted>?

Of course the 700k baht is a major hint but if you read the 1 post of the OP(see below) :

- The ex-boyfiend relationship ended in 2004 but she has sex with him till 2006 and the last trip the ex-boyfriend still wonder why she doesn't have sex with him

so when did really ended the relationship ? (if it's really ended otherwise why is he still asking to have sex).

- The ex-boyfriend worked in the OP gf parents farm but he cried all day and said he hates their daughter .

Strange parents to allow someone who hate their daughter to work on their farm.(even in isaan)

- She didn't tell him about the Farang (so you have to assume that she didn't tell the parents also otherwise he will know).

The OP and her are involved in a serious relationship and she never bring him to met her parents in isaan and she doesn't talk about him either

-The OP think that because he did apply for a fiancee visa there is no reason for her to lie.

On this one i think i don't have to make any comments

So yes for me there are enough "red lights" even without talking about the money to make my previous comment.

And anyway the OP is an adult i hope he will make is own choices and it's not a forum witch will influence his life (but he asked for our advises)

and as i said i wish him all the best

"

My gf told me that her ex-boyfriend has moved from Isaan to Bangkok. He's a leech and a drunk. She said that her ex may look for her and try to kill her. I don't want to get into the details, but suffice it to say, their relationship ended in 2004 (before she met me). She only sees him when she visits her parents since he helps on their farm. This last trip he asked her why she doesn't have sex with him (since 2006) whenever she visits (which is only 2-3 times a year since she works to help the family). She told him she doesn't love him and doesn't want to marry him. She didn't tell him about me. Her parents said he cried all day and said he hates her. He is now coming down to Bangkok to find work. She is afraid that he will try to find her and hurt/kill her. He doesn't know where she lives, but he does know where she works....ps. in April I did apply for a fiancee visa so there is no reason for her to lie to me about this incident unless she's plotting to fake her own death so she can walk away with the 700,000 baht I just wired her for a house we are building in Pak Chong (of course if I think that, I shouldn't be in this relationship)......

How common is domestic violence among Thai only couples compared to the US..... "

You are probably correct mate.

I am just trying to be somewhat of a devils advocate.

(Plus, I have had some negative experience with a Thai woman, so trying to be positive is a way for me to overcome my dislike of what I saw happening around me.)

[Misplaced]

Know many foreigners from all nations outside TV, and none seems to have this type of crazy problems with Thai ladies like you fellas here on TV. What are the chances of all you people with almost same issues just happened to be on TV together?....May be TV has cursed all of you for reading this website.....like they say "If you read it, It will come". Coincidence? perhaps! or may be a bunch of bullshiteters getting together and embellished stories for attention?

OK!!! LET THE FLAMING BEGINS!

[rinpoche]

Does a wife beating a drunken husband with a stick all the way home count as domestic violence in Thailand? If it does, I have witnessed DV a few times

yes i she don't let him finish the bottle before

Otherwise no, it's just a bad habit they catch by bringing the buffalos home everydays

Then do I feel sorry for the buffaloes or the drunken husband?

Ever noticed it is the large woman beating the small, skinny guy with a stick?

She could be the mother-in-law.

[rinpoche]

A post by the OP in another thread:

Violet Fonce....I'm with ya!

I just got engaged in Bangkok so I could take pictures for the K-1 Visa process. I gave the parents 50,000 baht as a down payment on the sin sod.

Early in the relationship, she told me 200,000 baht. Her mom asked for 300,000 baht. She told her mom she loves me and that I only have to pay 200,000 and for the extra 100,000, she will work when she comes here and give it to her....

I also only have to cough up 5 baht of gold.

Stats, girl from Issan, one 6yo son, BA degree from Mahidol University (I paid for 50% about 5K)

You know...in the long run, if it's true love, the amount of sin sod you pay is irrelevant...

Jai dee mak! Given stats like that, most Thai men wouldn't pay any sin sot at all. Why isn't he following Thai culture?

[Mossfinn]

<deleted> is a fiancee visa? Never heard of one.

Explanation of details regarding getting a Visa for your fiance