Women In Thailand, Women Overseas

[sbk]

I know a few members have moved back home with their husbands but I am curious as to how many of the women here live in Thailand or live back in their home countries (or somewhere else)?

Sorry gents, women only, thanks.

As for the why, well the fact is that in all the years I have lived in Thailand almost all of the women I know married to Thai men have moved back to their home countries. Usually with the husband but sometimes without. It seems to me that most of the women marrying Thai men marry fairly young and they move back home to raise their families and make some money. Only reason we didn't go is because we didn't have kids. So, ladies? care to satisfy my curiousity?

[PennyFarthing123]

My husband and are both retired. We are originally from the USA but have not lived there since 1982. We traveled extensively for about 10 years and then settled in Australia for about 12 years. We have now lived in Thailand for 3 years and are quite happy here. We plan on making this our final home, but then you never know what may happen in the future.

Edited July 14, 2009 by PennyFarthing123

[Sunsylvia]

I am 30 and not married but have a baby with my Thai partner and we live in Thailand.

I can afford to live here and support my Thai partner and could afford to send our child to a good school here later, but it is still something I am trying to figure out. I am not yet sure how to divide our time between Thailand and my home country to make sure our baby will learn both languages properly and fluently and experience the best of both cultures and gets a good education as well.

I think to become fluent in my language (German) we should live with our baby in my home country for about 1 year before he turns 5/6, around the age of 3/4 I guess, once he is already taking well in Thai language and make sure he gets lots of time playing and interacting with other kids to learn the language well.

That way we could decide later if he should start primary school in Thailand or my home country. It would not be good I guess to go exactly when primary school starts because without being fluent in the language it might be a hard start. My friend is a primary school teacher in Austria and told me that foreign kids who start primary school without being fluent have a hard time catching up from the start.

I would appreciate any advice from anyones own experience.

How to give the child some stability in life without constantly moving schools and travelling but still allow it to experience both cultures. What ages would be best to spend in which country and why?

[Boo]

As you know I lived for 7 years in thailand & married my thai husband there, the main reason for moving to UK 5 years ago was the lack of travel opportunities a thai passport gives so I wnated him to get citizenship, that has now been acheived. I also planned on having a child & wanted to be in UK to do so, so this killed 2 birds with one stone. Our son is now 2 & when we have the opportunity (probably year or 2 from now) we plan to spend some of his primary education in thailand for him to learn the lingo & customs properly.

For us life is fluid, we can live in either place, my husband loves life in the Uk but misses life in Thailand. Our ideal would be to interchange between the two when the need arises.

[bina]

still here in israel on kibbutz ; no good way of leaving to somewhere else in israel, let alone thailand, at the moment... four more years til his citizenship; once a year temp. resident status... and lots of culture shock problems at the moment-- europe and thailand have more in common than middle east and thailand it seems........

bina

israel

[MiG16]

not married

no Thai or non Thai partner

no kids

didnt answer the poll cos dont fit into any of the category you are curious about SBK but I just still like to answer the thread

but its certainly interesting to read your views about how to provide balance to the children re: education, language and culture

in today's globalised world, anyone that has a multicultural background has a lot of advantage in my opinion. so we all should make the most of the situation given that you have access to at least 2 cultures for our kids (but the question of how - too much overload, or identity confusion or in some cases the kids fail to fit in either culture could be the risks if proper balance is not achieved)

gosh its tough being parents eh?

[eek]

Live in Chiang Mai. Arrived...and never left. Im not quite sure what happened. I blinked and nearly 3 years went by. I feel like ive been here only a few months. 36 years old, but yesterday i was only 18...well i remember it like it was yesterday anyway. Was another blink. Well, a short snooze. Geez..where does time go? Does it get faster the older you get or something???!!!

Thai "significant other" who is 10 years older...and I wont say much regarding that because hmm...well lots of reasons really, all a bit too personal. Mostly its a jigsaw puzzle which ive yet to even find all the pieces for.

My only regret about living here is how far it is away from my brother and niece and nephew. That one pulls on my heart strings a lot. But..love SO much about here that its hard to even consider pulling away. Time will tell.

[Nienke]

Arrived...and never left.

Hhhmmm, that's sums it up alright.

I blinked and nearly 3 years went by.

Uuuhhh, more than 14 years already.

Does it get faster the older you get or something???!!!

Yup!

[pattaya_girl]

I met my Thai Partner nearly 8 Years ago and have lived in Thailand for over 8 Years. The Climate is better for my Asthma, and I dislike the thought of ever having to go back to the UK, so I am staying here.

[WaatWang]

Didn't vote because presently I've got one foot in Thailand and the other still in the US. Went to Thailand the first time almost 1 1/2 ys ago, just to visit my family there. My cousin introduced me to my current BF who is Thai. Loved the weather, the language, the architecture, my new friends, started learning Thai, but thought I must be crazy to even consider moving to the other side of the world! So I visited several more times - going every three months and staying for a month to see if the novelty would wear off. It never did - and the third trip convinced me to make the move, so the wheels have been in motion since then. My job approved me to work remotely full time as of April, and I'm officially moving to Thailand this September. We're staying in Thailand for the foreseeable future, but getting his visa lined up because he's planning to visit the US with me next summer. We'll just have to see where life takes us...

[meme]

I left Canada in 2002. Was in Thailand the whole time except for a year in Korea. My husband and I have been together for 5 years. I just turned the big 3-0 and we want to start a family, and we want him to make a go of it in Canada before we have kids(although don't get me wrong, he has wanted kids for the last 5 years but understands the importance of knowing he can live in Canada). We imagine our lives in both countries and neither of us are willing to commit to each other's home forever. Honestly the thought of settling in one country for the rest of our lives freaks me out. I am sure Mr. meme (who funnily enough is actually called mr. Boo in real life) would be happy to spend the rest of our lives in his home town, but he does have friends in Canada and really wants to work there and get a proper ESL education. So I am working for the summer in the US and he is wrapping things up in Thailand and meeting me in Canada in Sept.

[mssabai]

I have been in Thailand now really since 2005, with a couple of 5 month stints back at home. I started off by just travelling...and then wanting to teach for 1 year....that then progressed to 2 when I was offered a great job opportunity, and now 3. I met Mr Sabai 2 years ago. When we first got together I had no real understanding that we had a future...there were many many obstacles in our way...but something between us just clicked, and slowly slowly the obstacles just started melting away, without any real effort. It just felt right.

But the future is a tricky thing for us to think about. Some obstacles still remain. I am living in his home town with his family and I have a great job. But he cannot work here...unless he does a 6 day 12 hours a day job at the local fish canning plant for 5k a month. So he is back at high school and he is doing a kind of apprenticeship at a bike shop. Money is actually not a big problem for us. I am happy teaching, but I really feel like I need something more. I hit 30 in a couple of years and would like to have a business by then, here, so that we can stop feeling so dependent on my wage. I would like to have kids at least by my early 30s, but to do that we need another source of income. So the future has been weighing on my mind quite heavily at the moment. The weird thing is that a very good friend in Australia who has been married to a great guy for 6 years, has a fab job, house etc seems to be having very similar stresses. That comforts me a little knowing that the run up to 30 is a stressful time wherever you are. I feel as if the decisions I make now will affect the rest of my life much more than the ones I made 2 years ago.

So for the next few years at least I am going to be here, trying to build something that could be a future. If that doesn't seem possible, then I will have to look at moving back to the UK but I don't think this is a real possibility for us as a couple. I know that without a doubt Mr Sabai would not be able to deal with the life there. Maybe a year or so to earn money, but after 6 years of the career girl life in England, I just don't feel willing to sacrifice my quality of life like that any more. Life is just too short.

I miss my family and friends massively, but feel thankful that my school holidays allow me at least a month at home very year. Air Asia is also helping to that end!

[RueFang]

Oh how time flies! Mr Rue and I have been living back in Australia for one year in two weeks time!! While it has been really great to be back here, being able to see my friends and family and have conveniences I didn't have for years, I do really miss the lifestyle and how cheap everything is in Thailand!

As those who know me know, if it weren't for the Thai mother-in-law situation, I would have been more then happy to live out my days with my husband living in the village, but it all got too much having every aspect of our lives scrutinised by the MIL control freak. Mr Rue took quite a few months to adjust to the very different lifestyle in oz but he's been able to study for free here, has made friends at his college and through different Thai restaurants. When he met fellow southerners from Trang, Satun and Nakon he thought he'd died and gone to heaven!!

I would say that if MIL wasn't around and we had a bit more money to establish a good business, we'd go back to live in a heart beat. We have no real plan about what we're going to do long term aside from save money, try to have a bub and that's as far as the plan goes! Mr Rue was initially very opposed to living here for any more then 4 years but has recently said that if we have a baby he is happy for us to stay long term for the education side of things... could of knocked me over with a feather when he said that!

We'll be on the sunny shores of Thailand in 2 weeks for a couple of weeks and so can't wait!!!

[mearkat75]

i have been here since 2004,married a thai boy[divorced a thai boy haa haa] then met my 'soul mate' we have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and as time goes on i am convinced i will soon be back to the sunny UK with my little girl. i do visit the uk every year,hubby stays here,he isnt really interested in seeing another country?! the longer i stay here the more i worry about my childs education/lifestyle..

also like Ruefang i have a problem with my MIL haa haa

im 34 now,eekkkk,and havent 'worked' since my baby was born,basically im bored sh**less,money isnt a problem,the lack of brain stimulation is...

[redfish44]

Pieces of my story are on the board somewhere, but in a nutshell:

Met my thai bf on a small island in malaysia. That was 2 years ago now - doesn't time fly. He spends about 8 or more monrths of the year working in lanta in Thailand, and sometime working in malaysia during the thai monsoon. I work at sea on a 5 week on 5 week off roation, so just go find him when I am off. Have definitely considered Lanta home for the last year and a bit. He is in malaysia for my coming break, but still consider it a holiday, as does he, and thailand home. We just visited Aus for the fist time last break to meet my family/friends/etc and see where I come from etc, since that went ok we are considering whats next. He didn't want to go to Aus as so far away, so doubt he'd want to live there for very long, but didn't want to leave when it came to the end of our trip. I don't really want to move back there. Would consider having kids in Thailand, although still not sure what will happen there either. Am mid thirties, so really need to figure it out I guess. Just foound out yesterday he didn't tell his mum he was going to Aus though, so who knows what will happen when she finds out... why he didn't tell her: didn't want to make her mad... men!