How Long Have You Lived In Thailand?

[IanForbes]

I'm sure this has no bearing on the OP but sometimes granddaddy displaying pictures of his very young "companions" lessens the value of his other pursuits.

I understand as a granddaddy I'm supposed to give up sex and sit comfortably in my rocking chair with a blanket and slippers, but I'm just not ready for that yet. Some day soon, maybe, but not now. I've never posted any photos that were suggesting anything other than a group of us were having fun. I've got young friends here in Canada as well. And, I don't know any healthy, single male who wouldn't enjoy the company of attractive young women. If that offends some people then they have far more problems than any psychiatrist can solve.

I didn't start the original topic to talk about relationships, but to know what made people stay in Thailand after coming here. If relationships were part of it then I can understand that as well. Personally, I like the freedom of the country and the warm weather. Because I can follow my other interests while I'm here has made it a second home.

Edited July 18, 2009 by IanForbes

[venturalaw]

Welcome thrilled and thank you for your service to our country.

I settled in Chiang Mai for several reasons - small city feel with many larger city activities and assets. I have chosen to live in Thailand for much the same reason you gave - the situation in the US is untenable. Furthermore, people are happier here and easier to get along with. I've established a few friendships and enjoy the atmosphere. Expats are an interesting group generally speaking. They think outside the box and therefore took a risk to uproot from where they were raised to try a completely new and different country. I am proud to be part of that group. A girl originally brought me to Thailand 5 years ago. It didn't work out, but I fell in love with the country.

The funny things is, venturalaw, that so many of these adventurous, "outside the box" thinkers do nothing but whinge and complain because things aren't quite as they like and they can't get what they want in the supermarkets. Sad really.

From my experience the complainers are a very small percentage of the expats. In any event, I ignore them.

[femi fan]

Well, i'm going to be 18 in september... arrived here in 1991 with a thousand quid thinking i'd last quite a few months travelling around. After about four months spent mostly chilling out in samui and phangan, but with a trek and two weeks in chiang mai covered, the money came to an end. I only came on a one-way ticket. At the bottom of my rucksack was a pair of trousers, a proper shirt, and a tie. I blagged my way into a teaching english job simply because i had found a country that made me feel alive with every atom of my body and mind. I loved the food, the weather, the glorious beaches, the cheap prices of everything (in those days everything here just about was 5-10 time cheaper than england), and my interactions with the amazing people. And of course, not working for a few months, and being out of my home country, and therefore i was living with no societal expectations. My freedom in those days was sweet and heady.

I had my first class at a private language school on christmas eve. One three hour class on the saturday morning, and one in the afternoon. Adults. I had no fear because the dreaded need to return to england so soon had disappeared. And it turned out that this teaching english job became my vocation for nine years in bkk. I loved waking up in the morning and going to work. I loved my spare time in bkk, swimming, playing snooker, learning the lingo, going out with students for dinner and day or weekend trips, down the best discos with stunningly beautiful girls (my students) taking me and my mate, along with all their mates. I just could not get my head around this new thing in my life, being with girls who were not only amazingly beautiful, full of laughter and the joys of life, but inviting me out. Nothing like this happened in england. Here people look at you, in england that is a no-no. It's often so much more civilised and humanising living in thailand.

I never once got bored in nine years, i enjoyed every minute of it, and i would grab about three or four holidays a year and simply go down to samui, phangan, and tao and laze on my hammock. Been to almost all the beaches on all three islands, and learnt how to be much more chilled, accepting of everything.

I never had to wash my clothes, never had to cook, never had to worry about anything. I could eat out all the time, forget about the tv, never worry about jumpers and jackets when going out.

I can't recall complaining about anything thai or thailand in those nine heady years.

I went back to england for just over a year to study. It was a miserable experience, i mean being back there. When i came back i moved to chiang mai.

I reckon chiang mai must be one of the very very best places to live in the world. How lucky those of us are who have found this place to live in.

My only complaints about thailand? Very poor attitude to litter and waste disposal in general, and it's taking me bloody ages coming to terms with some of the driving manouvres. Other than that, what a magnificent country and people.

I shall thoroughly celebrate my 18th in a couple of months time!

[Ulysses G.]

Vey pleasant post. You certainly are a mature 18 year old femi fan!

[villagefarang]

I'm sure you know that this topic has been done to death. Simply tacking your little story onto the end of an old thread, just doesn't quite make the cut thought, does it? I too am guilty of doing similar in the past. Since I came in 1975 my story would no doubt be too lengthy for most TV'ers to wade through.

You still show great pride in your extracurricular activities. I on the other hand, am embarrassed to admit that it took me 20+ years of play before I moved on to other things. It will be interesting to see how people respond to yet another how long and why thread.

Bravo, well said. I'd hate to get cornered by this guy.

Whereas I do enjoy a literary tête-à-tête, it is not my aim to strike fear into the hearts of others. Words of well meaning and good intent often sting when falling upon an open wound, however. Some sensitivities cannot be foreseen, when putting word to page. Fear not my friend, it is not my nature to corner anyone. I do appreciate the "Bravo", none the less.

[IanForbes]

Vey pleasant post. You certainly are a mature 18 year old femi fan!

I was confused also because of the gramatical error. Otherwise a very good post and something I could relate to. Had I come to Thailand 40 years earlier I'm not sure I would have returned. As it is now I'm still enjoying what the country has to offer an old fart who likes to enjoy himself.

[idrankwhat]

I have lived in Thailand for 9 years now and the only reason I have stayed is because I have a decent job and can't complain about my lifestyle, I go back to New York every opportunity I have and stay as long as possible. I have never done the bar thing nor have I ever hung around it the sexpat area I would be too embarrassed to show my face and I can't imagine putting myself in a situation to get an incurable disease for a one night stand.

[Blinky Bill]

Well, i'm going to be 18 in september... arrived here in 1991 with a thousand quid thinking i'd last quite a few months travelling around. After about four months spent mostly chilling out in samui and phangan, but with a trek and two weeks in chiang mai covered, the money came to an end. .................................. ................................I shall thoroughly celebrate my 18th in a couple of months time!

I'm sorry, ff, but I'm a little confused here, maybe it's just me.

You say you arrived in 1991 and you are going to 18 in 2 months time. You must have been very young when you were wandering the beaches with 1,000 quid in your pocket. Were your parents watching from behind the scenes?

[femi fan]

Well, i'm going to be 18 in september... arrived here in 1991 with a thousand quid thinking i'd last quite a few months travelling around. After about four months spent mostly chilling out in samui and phangan, but with a trek and two weeks in chiang mai covered, the money came to an end. .................................. ................................I shall thoroughly celebrate my 18th in a couple of months time!

I'm sorry, ff, but I'm a little confused here, maybe it's just me.

You say you arrived in 1991 and you are going to 18 in 2 months time. You must have been very young when you were wandering the beaches with 1,000 quid in your pocket. Were your parents watching from behind the scenes?

No, i think ian got confused too, but UG has got it i think!

It will have been 18 years in september since i first came to thailand, and in effect never left the country, although as i mentioned i returned to england for a year or so to do some studying.

If you look at the thread title, i feel my somewhat loose licence with language is clear enough! So no, i was not zero years old when i got on that plane to come here in the first place!

As it happens i've had more adult years in thailand than my country of birth. I fee lucky really: i have a country of birth and a country of choice...

[Ulysses G.]

I can't imagine putting myself in a situation to get an incurable disease for a one night stand.

That pretty much means no sex at all. You must have great willpower.

[femi fan]

Vey pleasant post. You certainly are a mature 18 year old femi fan!

Thank you mate. However, had i never come here and never left my home country no doubt i'd be a lot maturer... if you get my drift! Here in thailand i can keep young so much more easily than back where i came from. Here i can take life a lot less seriously and hopefully this will keep me young as i get older and older...! In fact one of the most pleasant, but less obvious, byproducts of having ended up living here is that age becomes almost obsolete in terms of human interaction. I can have friends much younger than me, and much older than me.

And regarding chiang mai, one can have friends from different countries, different ages, different backgrounds. Variety is the spice of life.

And for me i see chiang mai as an adventure playground surrounded by a natural wonderland. Truly a gem of a place to live.

[femi fan]

I have lived in Thailand for 9 years now and the only reason I have stayed is because I have a decent job and can't complain about my lifestyle, I go back to New York every opportunity I have and stay as long as possible. I have never done the bar thing nor have I ever hung around it the sexpat area I would be too embarrassed to show my face and I can't imagine putting myself in a situation to get an incurable disease for a one night stand.

Being of good british stock i avoided the bar scene for almost two years when i first came here (pay for sex? you can't do that old boy). Finally, can't remember why, i did visit, and of course how glad i was! However after the initial excitement i spent more time in cowboy in those days watching the football than the girls. However, my point is that perhaps some of us try and keep away from this scene purely down to our past conditioning. One of the excitements of leaving your home country is putting yourself in a mode of exploration, ie being open to new things.

And you don't even need to worry really about picking up a disease! My, you can get that from somebody just breathing on you these days...

[Ulysses G.]

I was very much against "the bar scene" here until I went out once and found things very different from what I had been brainwashed into believing. I had the time of my life.

I have slowed down a lot on the night venues these days, but I still enjoy a trip to Spotlight every blue moon and I don't badmouth the bar scene just because I am not as interested as in my younger days.

[venturalaw]

I have lived in Thailand for 9 years now and the only reason I have stayed is because I have a decent job and can't complain about my lifestyle, I go back to New York every opportunity I have and stay as long as possible. I have never done the bar thing nor have I ever hung around it the sexpat area I would be too embarrassed to show my face and I can't imagine putting myself in a situation to get an incurable disease for a one night stand.

It's curios that you would stay in NY for 'as long as possible' every time that you return because it's so different from Thailand. I guess that you do not enjoy living in Thailand? If by NY you are referring to NY city, I can't imagine being drawn to stay there as long as possible and still endure what Thailand has to offer. NY city and most of Thailand seem diametrically opposite one another. Perhaps it's the cultural events present in NY that are lacking here in the LOS? Certainly it cannot be the warmth of the people. I bet you don't smile often when coming upon a farang that you don't know in public places - certainly when in NY city.

Edited July 19, 2009 by venturalaw

[femi fan]

I was very much against "the bar scene" here until I went out once and found things very different from what I had been brainwashed into believing. I had the time of my life.

I have slowed down a lot on the night venues these days, but I still enjoy a trip to Spotlight every blue moon and I don't badmouth the bar scene just because I am not as interested as in my younger days.

Well, indeed. I have a chuckle every time i hear a bloke badmouth it after having got a long-term girlfriend/wife. I also enjoy listening to those brainwashed folks who come here on their holidays, going on about how terrible the whole bar scene is, paying for sex etc. In fact it's amazing just how much brainwashing we've had in our home countries, often only really understood after leaving and going to live somewhere else.

I have been ultra lucky enough to have met and spoken to hundreds if not thousands of thai females in my time here - from work and from play. I've met the bar girl from isaan, and i've met the high-powered office manager, and everyone in between. Speaking thai, and perhaps being disarming, i've found many love to open up to a farang. I don't think i've ever had the chance to learn so much about humanity through one specific group of it, in my case thai females. Utmost respect for them. As for us farangs, and particularly those who really appreciate interacting with thai females, speaking thai allows us to enter this amazing world.

Those who look down upon bar girls, or those 'sleazy' older farang men who are completely and totally understandably drawn to them, say more about their own lives than their targets.

[Ulysses G.]

Well, indeed. I have a chuckle every time i hear a bloke badmouth it after having got a long-term girlfriend/wife. I also enjoy listening to those brainwashed folks who come here on their holidays, going on about how terrible the whole bar scene is, paying for sex etc. In fact it's amazing just how much brainwashing we've had in our home countries, often only really understood after leaving and going to live somewhere else.

Those who look down upon bar girls, or those 'sleazy' older farang men who are completely and totally understandably drawn to them, say more about their own lives than their targets.

What I really find amazing is the guys who have lived here for a number of years and still spout all of that holier than thou nonsense - I figure there wasn't much of a brain there to wash in the first place.

[eek]

I also enjoy listening to those brainwashed folks who come here on their holidays, going on about how terrible the whole bar scene is, paying for sex etc. In fact it's amazing just how much brainwashing we've had in our home countries, often only really understood after leaving and going to live somewhere else.

Dont you kinda think though that you and others once they get here get brain washed in the other direction though? That its the dun thing to go out and pay for sex. I realise i will come under fire for that, because many of the guys here are pro paying for sex and dont like it when others suggest otherwise so start throwing out comments like puritanical thinking. But to be honest, i think both are extreme ways of thinking. Consensual sex and sexual freedom where money doesnt exchange hands is different. Yes, i also have heard the various reasonings such as "you always pay one way or the other" etc and that the poor bar girl isnt so poor and its her choice etc. And, I can see the appeal for some guys of course; guaranteed sex without strings (well, hopefully without strings), and thats great unless you want to see it from the (majority) of the girls point of view. Ok, im off topic, sorry.. but well..you guys brought it up first (as many often do) so sometimes I think people should be allowed to put in a different perspective. Even if my perspective is different from yours, im giving my viewpoint respectfully (i think), so would be nice if people dont take the extreme defensive and lynch me.

[Ulysses G.]

Not really. I now realize that most of the sex I got at home was not about love or caring. In general, it was because I pleased a woman in a way that made her willing to share her body. I don't see a lot of difference between taking someone to a nice place, buying them jewelry, supporting them all out or just paying cash.

I realize that the whole dating/sex scene here is tilted in favor of men, but, on the other hand, it is tilted in the opposite way towards women in Western Countries - at least in the Western country that I come from.

I think that if men are smart enough to go where the advantage is in their favor, who can blame them?

Of course, there should be a place where everything is equal, but it does not seem to have been invented yet!

Edited July 19, 2009 by Ulysses G.

[villagefarang]

I also enjoy listening to those brainwashed folks who come here on their holidays, going on about how terrible the whole bar scene is, paying for sex etc. In fact it's amazing just how much brainwashing we've had in our home countries, often only really understood after leaving and going to live somewhere else.

Dont you kinda think though that you and others once they get here get brain washed in the other direction though? That its the dun thing to go out and pay for sex. I realise i will come under fire for that, because many of the guys here are pro paying for sex and dont like it when others suggest otherwise so start throwing out comments like puritanical thinking. But to be honest, i think both are extreme ways of thinking. Consensual sex and sexual freedom where money doesnt exchange hands is different. Yes, i also have heard the various reasonings such as "you always pay one way or the other" etc and that the poor bar girl isnt so poor and its her choice etc. And, I can see the appeal for some guys of course; guaranteed sex without strings (well, hopefully without strings), and thats great unless you want to see it from the (majority) of the girls point of view. Ok, im off topic, sorry.. but well..you guys brought it up first (as many often do) so sometimes I think people should be allowed to put in a different perspective. Even if my perspective is different from yours, im giving my viewpoint respectfully (i think), so would be nice if people dont take the extreme defensive and lynch me.

People tend to act first and come up with their rationalization after the fact, to justify what they do. No biggie, just human nature. Plenty of room for everyone, really. Sadly there are those who get evangelical on both sides. It is always easier to get along if we compartmentalize a bit. Many Farangs don't seem to understand the notion of being situation appropriate. Do what you want but don't necessarily broadcast it so widely. Keep it on the other side of the tracks, as it were. Saves being stigmatized or unnecessarily offending, providing greater freedom for all.

[Chaimai]

Dont you kinda think though that you and others once they get here get brain washed in the other direction though? That its the dun thing to go out and pay for sex. I realise i will come under fire for that, because many of the guys here are pro paying for sex and dont like it when others suggest otherwise so start throwing out comments like puritanical thinking. But to be honest, i think both are extreme ways of thinking. Consensual sex and sexual freedom where money doesnt exchange hands is different. Yes, i also have heard the various reasonings such as "you always pay one way or the other" etc and that the poor bar girl isnt so poor and its her choice etc. And, I can see the appeal for some guys of course; guaranteed sex without strings (well, hopefully without strings), and thats great unless you want to see it from the (majority) of the girls point of view. Ok, im off topic, sorry.. but well..you guys brought it up first (as many often do) so sometimes I think people should be allowed to put in a different perspective. Even if my perspective is different from yours, im giving my viewpoint respectfully (i think), so would be nice if people dont take the extreme defensive and lynch me.

I don't think that this is "off topic" - you have highlighted one of the reasons why people live here.

I am most definately in the group that says Thailand is great for the option to pay for sex if you want it. But, there are so many variations on this theme - if you don't want to go through the 'hansum man, where you from' charade then you can just go to Sabailand and buy, lierally, off the shelf or pick any one of a thousand massage parlours. If you want to play the Go Go bars and take away a stunning 20 year old, it's there. If you just want to have a drink in an environment where the girls are attentive then for the price of a few drinks you can have an enjoyable evening.

I personally enjoy the open bars and, in response to the opening gambit of 'where you from' I now tell that girls I come from Thailand and show them a picture of my girlfriend. I tipped one young lady 400 Baht saying that in different circumstances I would have paid the bar and I hoped that she would use the money to visit her daughters in Korat - she probably didn't .

I do get annoyed with those puritanical comments but I don't recommend others to partake of, say, Pattaya's attractions nor would I dream of sneering at someone who chooses to share their life with their 55 year old wife. Good luck to all but, please, do not try to promote 'your way' as the only way.

[venturalaw]

Dont you kinda think though that you and others once they get here get brain washed in the other direction though? That its the dun thing to go out and pay for sex. I realise i will come under fire for that, because many of the guys here are pro paying for sex and dont like it when others suggest otherwise so start throwing out comments like puritanical thinking. But to be honest, i think both are extreme ways of thinking. Consensual sex and sexual freedom where money doesnt exchange hands is different. Yes, i also have heard the various reasonings such as "you always pay one way or the other" etc and that the poor bar girl isnt so poor and its her choice etc. And, I can see the appeal for some guys of course; guaranteed sex without strings (well, hopefully without strings), and thats great unless you want to see it from the (majority) of the girls point of view. Ok, im off topic, sorry.. but well..you guys brought it up first (as many often do) so sometimes I think people should be allowed to put in a different perspective. Even if my perspective is different from yours, im giving my viewpoint respectfully (i think), so would be nice if people dont take the extreme defensive and lynch me.

I don't think that this is "off topic" - you have highlighted one of the reasons why people live here.

I am most definately in the group that says Thailand is great for the option to pay for sex if you want it. But, there are so many variations on this theme - if you don't want to go through the 'hansum man, where you from' charade then you can just go to Sabailand and buy, lierally, off the shelf or pick any one of a thousand massage parlours. If you want to play the Go Go bars and take away a stunning 20 year old, it's there. If you just want to have a drink in an environment where the girls are attentive then for the price of a few drinks you can have an enjoyable evening.

I personally enjoy the open bars and, in response to the opening gambit of 'where you from' I now tell that girls I come from Thailand and show them a picture of my girlfriend. I tipped one young lady 400 Baht saying that in different circumstances I would have paid the bar and I hoped that she would use the money to visit her daughters in Korat - she probably didn't .

I do get annoyed with those puritanical comments but I don't recommend others to partake of, say, Pattaya's attractions nor would I dream of sneering at someone who chooses to share their life with their 55 year old wife. Good luck to all but, please, do not try to promote 'your way' as the only way.

Well said.

[femi fan]

I also enjoy listening to those brainwashed folks who come here on their holidays, going on about how terrible the whole bar scene is, paying for sex etc. In fact it's amazing just how much brainwashing we've had in our home countries, often only really understood after leaving and going to live somewhere else.

Dont you kinda think though that you and others once they get here get brain washed in the other direction though? That its the dun thing to go out and pay for sex. I realise i will come under fire for that, because many of the guys here are pro paying for sex and dont like it when others suggest otherwise so start throwing out comments like puritanical thinking. But to be honest, i think both are extreme ways of thinking. Consensual sex and sexual freedom where money doesnt exchange hands is different. Yes, i also have heard the various reasonings such as "you always pay one way or the other" etc and that the poor bar girl isnt so poor and its her choice etc. And, I can see the appeal for some guys of course; guaranteed sex without strings (well, hopefully without strings), and thats great unless you want to see it from the (majority) of the girls point of view. Ok, im off topic, sorry.. but well..you guys brought it up first (as many often do) so sometimes I think people should be allowed to put in a different perspective. Even if my perspective is different from yours, im giving my viewpoint respectfully (i think), so would be nice if people dont take the extreme defensive and lynch me.

Hope you're enjoying your sunday morning eek! Nah, i personally didn't get brainwashed the other way. I could write a book on all of this, literally. But in essence what it comes down to for me i think is the conundrum of body and mind feeding different messages to the central processing unit in our brain. Which one do we listen to??! That is the choice males have to make over here.

I've never once seen it the done thing to do. One of the things i love about thailand is that i'm much better able to follow my own instincts and intuition in life without the constrictive interferences from society at large. I am guided by the need to not harm life, not by man's laws. That is very difficult in many countries, and as it happens thailand is going that way slowly but surely too.

For whatever reasons (not important here) i much more frequently would just chat with girls in the bars and practise my thai and enjoy their company for a while.

Look the thing is, many a single man is going to enjoy life a bit more in bangkok than london, just so long as they can undo the brainwashing they had back home.

Incidentally i can't imagine living in chiang mai if one is still attracted to the bar scene as a default for living in thailand. Chiang Mai is a place with so much to do, so many experiences to be had. And the money's <deleted> anyway, so after paying for my food and beer, where's the money for the girls??!

[eek]

Good luck to all but, please, do not try to promote 'your way' as the only way.

I always open to other peoples viewpoints, even if differ from my own. I whole heartedly agree with your last sentence. Nothing is ever black and white.

edit:

Hope you're enjoying your sunday morning eek!

Haha, Thanks! To you too.

Interesting to read the feedback on my post, at this time i have no comment, just taking in and mulling over peoples responses. Thanks for the non-lynching.

Edited July 19, 2009 by eek

[femi fan]

People tend to act first and come up with their rationalization after the fact, to justify what they do. No biggie, just human nature. Plenty of room for everyone, really. Sadly there are those who get evangelical on both sides. It is always easier to get along if we compartmentalize a bit. Many Farangs don't seem to understand the notion of being situation appropriate. Do what you want but don't necessarily broadcast it so widely. Keep it on the other side of the tracks, as it were. Saves being stigmatized or unnecessarily offending, providing greater freedom for all.

Some people may tend to do that, but from my account and UG"s you'll no doubt have noted that others don't do this. I wasn't doing something because i couldn't justify doing it. I avoided action because of brainwashing.

Personally in my time i have loved swapping my lifestyle between bar scene and not bar scene for my evening entertainment. For me, the latter has been much more frequent in my 18 years here, and in fact the former no longer is part of my life.

To have such a choice though is what helps make thailand attractive for many.

Incidentally, you yourself oughta be careful about proclaiming what 'human nature' is or is not... you'll forever find yourself in dodgy territory mate!

[femi fan]

Good luck to all but, please, do not try to promote 'your way' as the only way.

I always open to other peoples viewpoints, even if differ from my own. I whole heartedly agree with your last sentence. Nothing is ever black and white.

Err, it is at thai universities...!

[villagefarang]

People tend to act first and come up with their rationalization after the fact, to justify what they do. No biggie, just human nature. Plenty of room for everyone, really. Sadly there are those who get evangelical on both sides. It is always easier to get along if we compartmentalize a bit. Many Farangs don't seem to understand the notion of being situation appropriate. Do what you want but don't necessarily broadcast it so widely. Keep it on the other side of the tracks, as it were. Saves being stigmatized or unnecessarily offending, providing greater freedom for all.

Some people may tend to do that, but from my account and UG"s you'll no doubt have noted that others don't do this. I wasn't doing something because i couldn't justify doing it. I avoided action because of brainwashing.

Personally in my time i have loved swapping my lifestyle between bar scene and not bar scene for my evening entertainment. For me, the latter has been much more frequent in my 18 years here, and in fact the former no longer is part of my life.

To have such a choice though is what helps make thailand attractive for many.

Incidentally, you yourself oughta be careful about proclaiming what 'human nature' is or is not... you'll forever find yourself in dodgy territory mate!

One could easily play an infinite game of semantics, with warnings, attacks, counters and justifications for what we believe. That would be such a waste. Neither is there a need for everyone to detail how much time they spend doing what, as a justification. There seems to be a growing consensus among the level headed in this thread, to live and let live. Alas, people do love to advertise their sex life it seems.

Edited July 19, 2009 by villagefarang

[villagefarang]

Is anyone ever going to get back to giving their story about why they have stayed here? I seem to remember the OP asking something about that.

[femi fan]

One could easily play an infinite game of semantics, with warnings, attacks, counters and justifications for what we believe. That would be such a waste. Neither is there a need for everyone to detail how much time they spend doing what, as a justification. There seems to be a growing consensus among the level headed in this thread, to live and let live. Alas, people do love to advertise their sex life it seems.

Live and let live, yeah. So, why does it bother you if people advertise their sex lives? Let them. No harm done.

An infinite game of semantics probably accurately describes much of the use of language. But how many attacks and counters and warnings and justifications are going on in this thread rather than in your own head from your own perceptions?

And i'm sure people'll be along soon to add to the OP. Have you told your story here yet? I can't recall it.

[carlosacao]

My 2 satang worth of input would be that none of us is really in a clear position to judge other people or lifestyles (there are clear black and white rights and wrongs of course) since it would be not possible for us to know the inner workings, perspectives, etc of those situations and people; everything and everybody includes the black, the white and everything in between; one person can't really put themselves in the shoes of another one.

Everybody including bar women, high morals women, western women, Thai women, old fat farang men, young good looking farang men and you name it have their own agenda, their own life lessons that are trying to learn which we don't know, have their own unique perspective of life and experiences and growth that they need to do............ so I would say that at the same time that we should encourage the basic elements of life that work towards improving society and people's lives................................ think twice about judging, the issues and people are always more complex than what it seems. Like one guy in the middle east said a couple of millennia ago: "those free of sin throw the first stone". Don't lynch me now, just trying to help.

[femi fan]

My 2 satang worth of input would be that none of us is really in a clear position to judge other people or lifestyles (there are clear black and white rights and wrongs of course) since it would be not possible for us to know the inner workings, perspectives, etc of those situations and people; everything and everybody includes the black, the white and everything in between; one person can't really put themselves in the shoes of another one.

Everybody including bar women, high morals women, western women, Thai women, old fat farang men, young good looking farang men and you name it have their own agenda, their own life lessons that are trying to learn which we don't know, have their own unique perspective of life and experiences and growth that they need to do............ so I would say that at the same time that we should encourage the basic elements of life that work towards improving society and people's lives................................ think twice about judging, the issues and people are always more complex than what it seems. Like one guy in the middle east said a couple of millennia ago: "those free of sin throw the first stone". Don't lynch me now, just trying to help.

One of the reasons i so like living in thailand is that all of this is so much more possible than back in england. Compared to living there, here seems like a place with almost zero judgments going on. I see my life in chiang mai as being part of an international community where people come from so many backgrounds that differences are almost taken as normal and therefore cause no or very little division between people.

It really is easy to just get on with people here without finding out what their job is and then making a full-scale character judgment.