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"Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in

connecting the right staff member, please listen

to all your options before making a selection:

"To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1

"To make excuses for why your child did not do his work- Press 2

"To complain about what we do - Press 3

"To swear at staff members - Press 4

"To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several

flyers mailed to you - Press 5

"If you want us to raise your child - Press 6

"If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone - Press 7

"To request another teacher for the third time this year- Press 8

"To complain about bus transportation - Press 9

"To complain about school lunches - Press 0

"If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable and responsible for

his/her own behavior, class work, homework, and that it's not the teachers' fault for your child's

lack of effort: Hang up and have a nice day!"

If you can read this thank a teacher.

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