Girls Point Of View - Are Prostitutes Annoying?

[Lovedog100]

My apologies for any offense caused. A simple "Eff off you boring pedantic B" would have sufficed.

Haha. Actually, those kinds of expressions are just not in vocabulary. I shocked a friend the other day when i came out with "ignorant b****!" , when a woman in a pickup truck nearly ran us over(edit..MUST put comma in here lol!), whilst (edit: WE were)walking down a side street with no pavement. My friend was startled because its just not that common for me to cuss.. Mind you, my language is getting more colourful since driving in Thai traffic..but usually under my breath. Better watch myself before it starts becoming the norm.( i probably messed up a lot grammar-wise..but i give up!)

I know topics on this forum can get heated, and its part of what makes it an interesting place to visit. I know us ladies can get mean about men, but in our defense its usually in retaliation. Not that that is helpful, it just makes things go round in circles, but it IS hard to keep biting our lips so to speak (or at least for me, as I should only really speak for myself). There are many times i just ignore a dig and move on, but other times it gets under my skin. Particularly comments in the Ladies forum, which is kind of our little haven. Its tiring to read numerous negative comments about western women. Im sure Thai women feel the same about the stereotypes about them. hel_l, im sure men here are tired of being stereotyped too! In an ideal world we would all be respectful to each other, but unfortunately we need more practice.

..and i know my grammar DOES stink..but so often i just type out my thoughts without checking. Bad form..but even if i did check, id likely still have a ton of mistakes anyway. Thats why im not in Thailand as an English teacher!

Im waffling on..and its all off topic..so ill just shut up now..

Interesting, after reading your prior post. "Uh huh..because so many of the "hansum men" who hang out in bars with prostitutes with their balding heads, bad breath, beer guts, and dire sense of humour, are such a tragic loss to women in the west. "

"hel_l, im sure men here are tired of being stereotyped too!"

[mark45y]

mark..im sorry, but I believe you are talking through a hole in your ..head.

I dont know where you live, but I know MANY couples in Chiang Mai. Farang/farang and Thaiman/farang woman. It also may come as a shock to you (guys who are only into Thai women and Asiaphiles etc usually do find this a shock..and usually dispute it as its incomprehensible to them), but there are many men who just arent attracted to Thai women. I know many women who came here by choice, and who stay here by choice, myself included. Im guessing you dont know or talk to that many western female expats here, or you would have a better understanding of why women like me enjoy living here. I know farang couples that came here together and are happy together, and i know farang couples that met whilst here. Also, there are western women who come initially with no intention of staying on, but enjoy the Thai way and fall for the charm and good manners of a Thai man. Some women are happy solo and enjoy casual dating both farang and Thai men (another shock horror). Wherever have you garnered your information from? The recesses of your mind??

Respectfully, how many men are on ThaiVisa and how many women? Respectfully, how many single men vacation from Britain and Australia and how many single women? Respectfully, how many couples vacation from Britain and/or Australia? I think it is 95% male. Who knows maybe I am wrong. Maybe it is only 90%

How many women come to Thailand and marry a local and stay as opposed to men? 1 out of 1000? Maybe one out of 10,000?

[eek]

Hmm...i guess you didnt actually take on board the R E T A L I A T I O N part and the reasoning behind that comment, which i also said gets us nowhere and respect for E A C H other would be nice. Fyi I have good friendships with many western men in Thailand and very few of them would even come close to that description. My point is that for all the derogatory comments made against western women (of which, on this forum, are many), western women do not lament the loss of those kinds of men. The bgs are most welcome to them! But ok..sure, im sure men dont like getting stereotyped either, i hear ya. But often its the kind of men who are happy to spew out lots of nasty little comments about women, who dont like it when their fragile egos are bruised when someone actually reminds them that the "handsom man" line is most likely hype.

[sbk]

Respectfully, how many men are on ThaiVisa and how many women? Respectfully, how many single men vacation from Britain and Australia and how many single women? Respectfully, how many couples vacation from Britain and/or Australia? I think it is 95% male. Who knows maybe I am wrong. Maybe it is only 90%

How many women come to Thailand and marry a local and stay as opposed to men? 1 out of 1000? Maybe one out of 10,000?

ThaiVisa is not indicative of tourists to Thailand. I have been in the tourist industry for the past 20 years. Oops, make that 21. Koh Phangan attracts young backpackers and young families. Shock and horror, many of these young people are couples, and many single girls and single guys --and very few of them dump their girlfriend for a thai girl (in fact, having run bungalows for nearly 10 years I can say I have never seen it yet) but I imagine my extensive experience in the tourist industry carries little weight with you so I wont' bother to extrapolate further. Please feel free to continue with your stereotyped ideas. I am sure its much easier that way.

[StreetCowboy]

Thailand hasn't changed much. There were the same % of pay for play ladies in the 1500's, 1930's or 1950's. The only thing that has changed is the population. In the 1500's, 1930's or 1950's almost all the visitors to Thailand were men so no one asked the same kind of questions as the OP.

...

8>< SNIP ><8

I have to bow to your superior experience, as most things of which you speak are before my time.

My wife did not come here to get rid of me, quite the contrary, I believe.

I'm not sure about the other mothers at the school, its a topic that I'd rather not broach.

In the past, before we lived her, we used to come for the beaches and the temples and the shopping. I guess THailand must have moved on a lot since your days, but I do appreciate you sharing your depth of experience in the country

SC

[Lovedog100]

mark..im sorry, but I believe you are talking through a hole in your ..head.

I dont know where you live, but I know MANY couples in Chiang Mai. Farang/farang and Thaiman/farang woman. It also may come as a shock to you (guys who are only into Thai women and Asiaphiles etc usually do find this a shock..and usually dispute it as its incomprehensible to them), but there are many men who just arent attracted to Thai women. I know many women who came here by choice, and who stay here by choice, myself included. Im guessing you dont know or talk to that many western female expats here, or you would have a better understanding of why women like me enjoy living here. I know farang couples that came here together and are happy together, and i know farang couples that met whilst here. Also, there are western women who come initially with no intention of staying on, but enjoy the Thai way and fall for the charm and good manners of a Thai man. Some women are happy solo and enjoy casual dating both farang and Thai men (another shock horror). Wherever have you garnered your information from? The recesses of your mind??

eek, you have said it here. There are many farang farang couples in Thailand, and many farang men would rather be with a farang woman. Yet, the females on TV all seem to suffer from the "woh is me, all farang men have issues and hate me" syndrome. Men are painted with the same wide stereo type paint brush as the ladies claim they are. Men are accused of having an "agenda", or having "issues" Personally I find it insulting that someone that doesn't know me, will tell me what I think, or how I feel. Three lines in a post taken out of context doesn't give anyone enough information to know me, or how I think. Men much like any other group have many different ways of thinking. That is why there is more than one political party, or why a car comes in more than one color. No group of any sort can claim that everyone thinks the same. There are people from all over the world, and several different cultures, and sub cultures on TV.

Like it or not, there are differences between western women, and Thai women. Just the same as between western men, and Thai men. A reference to the difference isn't always meant to belittle one or the other. Just as a discussion about a Honda motorbike against a Yamaha motorbike. A Honda rider should be able to say why they chose Honda. Even though they did, it doesn't mean that they hate Yamaha, just that the Honda fit their needs better. So what?

It would appear than many here can't tell the difference between the statement "I hate all farang women" and the statement "I hate the way some farang women have treated me" There is a BIG difference. The latter is not personal against you or any other woman on this board. To me a statement like "hansum men" who hang out in bars with prostitutes with their balding heads, bad breath, beer guts, and dire sense of humour" is equal to "bitter arrogant woman, with short dyed hair, bad breath, fat ass, and no sense of humor" Yet both could be true of some ex-pats or those visiting Thailand, but not all. Or even a majority in my opinion.

I'll give it to you, in Thailand men visit prostitutes more openly than in the west. It is more accepted and tolerated here. Most men that will go with a prostitute here, would never even think about it at home. Just as many men that use them regularly at home don't ever come to Thailand. The OP asked if prostitutes are annoying from a girls point of view. An answer from this man is, what's to be annoyed about? You aren't the ones being grabbed at, or hooted at, you aren't called a cheap charlie because you don't want to buy a lady drink, nor are you lied to, or taken advantage of. It's the men that should be annoyed, and many many times are. Interestingly enough, I'll get cat calls and gestures to come over from lady boys while I'm walking with my girlfriend. She takes no notice, yet I am in awe that they would have the nerve to do it, besides being a little creeped out by it.

[StreetCowboy]

8>< SNIP - NESTED QUOTES DELETED ><8

Interesting, after reading your prior post. "Uh huh..because so many of the "hansum men" who hang out in bars with prostitutes with their balding heads, bad breath, beer guts, and dire sense of humour, are such a tragic loss to women in the west. "

"hel_l, im sure men here are tired of being stereotyped too!"

If she'd been stereotyping, she'd have omitted the word "many".

'Many' implies a substantial number - far more than two - but not all. 'Many' is more than 'some', and may be more or less than 'most'.

I've never felt stereotyped, so you might want to add a "some" into your bold comment, and an apostrophe and a capital.

Having said that I don't feel stereotyped, she has actually got me down pretty accurately there in the description. The balding I feel I can't do too much about, and the breath and the gut are largely down to too much drink, I think, and I suspect Eek does not find my sense of humour as funny as I do.

Luckily she missed out 'thick-skinned'. And yet I think I'm younger and more personable than most of the other customers in the bars...

In my opinion, some posters seem to manage to combine insensitivity with oversensitivity in a most unappealing manner.

SC

I wonder how many of the ladies here have spent much time talking to bar girls... tyring to make a link to the original topic..

[Boo]

In my post earlier I said that I spent a considerable amount of time in lady bars due to my husbands previous work. I also in my single days lived in a soi in Lamai behind girlie bars where the working girls, lived & being the only farang & a women meant that I was very popular with my neighbors, pre work lao kao drinking sessions, writing letters & then later emails, helping them translate the letters they received from various "teerak" & general girl talk. Every day was spent eating at least one meal with 2 or more of the women & I got a real, honest insight into them & their lives.

Bargirls are doing a job. They, ime, tend to ignore couples cause as another poster rightly said, they have enough single men around to hook without needing to resort to trying to entice a man in a couple.

That said though, IF the man is so inclined to procure the services of a bar girl then it is nothing to do with a bg stealing him away, she is just doing her job & imo the blame would lay solely with the bf/husband.

[eek]

I dont want to go back over things to explain myself..so may i just say that i dont actually mind at all who is balding or bad breathed or beer bellied or ANYTHING.. no matter how a man looks, if he is a gentleman, that will always shine through. I have male friends of all ages, and some of them do have a personal life that involves bargirls, but thats not my business. They never talk about that side (why would they? Decent men dont feel the need to broadcast their sex lives), and i never ask. I, like most women, always appreciate good manners in men, and will always reciprocate with a smile and friendliness in return. Thats all that matters.

Anyway..as for bargirls, and if they are annoying or not, im sure the OP probably has a good idea about what to expect now..albeit buried in amongst all our off-topic replies.

[Lovedog100]

I dont want to go back over things to explain myself..so may i just say that i dont actually mind at all who is balding or bad breathed or beer bellied or ANYTHING.. no matter how a man looks, if he is a gentleman, that will always shine through. I have male friends of all ages, and some of them do have a personal life that involves bargirls, but thats not my business. They never talk about that side (why would they? Decent men dont feel the need to broadcast their sex lives), and i never ask. I, like most women, always appreciate good manners in men, and will always reciprocate with a smile and friendliness in return. Thats all that matters.

Anyway..as for bargirls, and if they are annoying or not, im sure the OP probably has a good idea about what to expect now..albeit buried in amongst all our off-topic replies.

Think we should tell her about better places to go than Phuket? Some hinted about staying away from Patong, however everyone seem to migrate there at some point. Koh Samui would be my recommendation. Beautiful beaches, more of English spoken, tuk tuk's, restaurants, shop keepers, and massage girls, aren't anywhere near as agressive. Easy to find a nice bungalow on the beach. Best of all, (for her) the P4P scene is much more low key, and not in your face. I don't remember seeing any bar girls on the main streets there. Going as a couple, it would be my first choice.

[mark45y]

Thailand taken as a whole has 99% male expats living here as opposed to western female expats or western couples living here. Everybody in Britain and Australia knows why. Why do you think the OP asked the question? The only people who don’t know why seem to be posting on Thaivisa. I am assuming the OP has not visited Thailand. If she is deaf dumb and blind she’ll be OK or if boyfriend is deaf dumb and blind she will be OK. You only have to sit in a coffee shop on a busy thoroughfare anywhere in Thailand and watch the white skinned tourist couples walk past to see what is happening. It is not so much the hookers. I don’t live in a town where there is obvious prostitution. In the course of a normal day I get propositioned at least three times. The motorcycle taxi ladies, the waitress at the restaurant and the students that hang out at the internet café. I went to the doctor to get my blood pressure checked and the nurse giving a stress test asked me out for lunch. Another nurse giving me the results of the blood test told me we were good to go. Anecdotal stories about populations of small islands hardly are representative of the Thai tourist population.

If the OP lets her boyfriend out of her sight for more than a minute a lady is going to hit on him. I opened up a new bank account and the head teller asked me out.

Perhaps you ladies still living in Thailand are insulated or just unnoticing that is why I posted the information.

I don’t care what Eek thinks of the men here. It is good after a hard days work to be reminded of western attitudes it makes some of the odd things here a little more bearable. But I really believe you are not giving the OP an accurate picture of what life is like here. Thailand is a men’s paradise, sure it used to be better before the PC NGO’s started moving in but a men’s paradise nevertheless. Sure things are changing with the new emphasis on Asian tourism. Sure Phuket is full of Eurotrash but it is still Thailand. I have read the stories of a number of women who have lost men here on another site. Not as popular as Thaivisa but still a well read site. It happens all the time. I even watched a Utube movie about it, as if I hadn’t seen and heard it everyday myself.

You are taking a risk to bring a western man to Thailand. Things here are like they were a long time ago in the west. Remember when stewardesses were hired because they were good looking? Remember when it was OK to make fun of fat people and midgets? Remember when most people were prejudiced? Remember when you could tell off colour jokes at work? Every day I walk past a large home here and you wouldn’t believe the figurine on the front lawn. Or maybe you would if you lived in Thailand.

Someone should tell the OP that 1. Thai’s think all western men are rich. 2. Thai’s think that white skin is very important in deciding attractiveness. 3. What is an average catch in Farang land is a great catch in Thailand.

Thailand sets another trap for the unsuspecting Brit traveler and that is gender confusion. If, god forbid the OP’s boyfriend has any questions about his gender preference this trip may be a life changing experience for him. What percent of normally straight men are confused, to say the least, when they encounter Thailand’s third sex? I don’t know and I am not talking about just working people here. There are lady boys in every facet of Thai society. Someone should let the OP know.

[sbk]

Yup, Mark has all the statistics spot on. 99% of all expats living in Thailand are men. 90% of all tourists visiting Thailand are single men and 100% of all men can't be trusted to keep it in their pants.

Guess us women might as well just shoot ourselves in the head and get it over with.

[Boo]

lol, yes totally right. Just like I didn't get hit on by a younger hot farang guy on Wednesday night whilst we were surrounded by all the thai women, bg & non who are all prepared to drop draws for him for just being farang???

I actually find it quite offensive to thai women too, to imply that they are all so easy that just they are all waiting to hit on anything western & male.

[Naam]

Yup, Mark has all the statistics spot on. 99% of all expats living in Thailand are men. 90% of all tourists visiting Thailand are single men and 100% of all men can't be trusted to keep it in their pants.

Guess us women might as well just shoot ourselves in the head and get it over with.

i shtrongly rezent ziss inzinuashion!

[harrry]

Yup, Mark has all the statistics spot on. 99% of all expats living in Thailand are men. 90% of all tourists visiting Thailand are single men and 100% of all men can't be trusted to keep it in their pants.

Guess us women might as well just shoot ourselves in the head and get it over with.

i shtrongly rezent ziss inzinuashion!

Naam are you talking through your teeth like that because of the pain caused by the zip getting caught when you tried to keep it in your pants?

[TheLaughingMan]

Well all I can say is I really want to know where Mark lives. Because in Bangkok non bargirls do not try to pick up falang men. Either that or Mark is young and extremely handsome cause Im 36 and fit and.... not ugly and I never receive that kind of attention from normal Thai women. What paradise town do you live in Mark?

[mark45y]

I conducted a day long seminar for government workers in a Thai industrial town a year ago. The purpose of the seminar was to increase tourism and communication between Thai’s and tourists. There were also two Filipino men doing the English instruction. One of the Filipino men was half white. He spoke the best Thai. The government workers (about 100) were 90% women and after lunch 100% female because the men got bored and left. A part of the process was to fill out an application in English. When it got to the marital status part I was surprised that the married ladies began asking for a box to check that said, “not married today.”

I am a shy guy and one of the reasons I like living in Thailand is I don’t have to approach women (not talking hookers here). If you don’t know, maybe you should ask a guy living in Thailand what it’s like. The, “are you married” question is right up there with the “where do you come from question.” And, if you are married do you know any other Farang who aren’t married?

Do you really not know this or are you just making PC conversation?

A lot of British and Canadian people retire and vacation in Florida. It is mostly couples as one would expect going for the sun and cheap land prices. I lived there for a while and I have lived in Thailand for a while.

I take a bus to work most days and it is the exception when some lady does not start a conversation with me. I did the same thing in Canada and I swear no woman ever took the time or trouble to inquire where I was from or how I was feeling or if I was hungry.

When I first got to Thailand I went to ex pat club meetings in a number of cities. It was always the same almost all males from different parts of the globe. Maybe Thaivisa, expat clubs and/or the foot traffic I see on the streets or in the malls is not representative of the actual numbers of western people living here. Maybe all the white women in Thailand stay home every day.

In any event I was not trying to start a fight or be offensive. I was only relating my reality, living in Thailand every day. I have family living in the west and I have told the female members the same thing. Never bring hubby to Thailand.

At least the OP has both sides of the story. I guess if she comes to Thailand she should report back with her impressions, short and long term. I do wonder though, what percentages of couples and single females the posters think live here?

[TheLaughingMan]

Truth is I never get out of Bangkok except for the occasional job that takes me out of the city. And I don't know this wonderful friendly Thailand you enjoy. I don't doubt it exists, I just dont see it at all in Bangkok.

[Misty]

The only good reason for a woman to bring a man to Thailand is to get rid of him. And in that case it is very easy to accomplish the objective.

Mmmm....then I'm doing something very wrong.... Soon to be married for 22 years, and over 16 of them in Thailand....

[IanForbes]

As I've said many times on these topics, there are always two sides to every story. I don't doubt Mark's personel experiences at all. I've seen it with many men, and ladies also. They just attract other people. I don't believe it is the norm, but it certainly happens. I've been hit on many times and I'm certainly no handsome young man. And, with a couple of my friends it is always them that get the attention rather than me.

But back on topic, I doubt if a farang couple will have any problems at all with the so called "prostitutes" of Thailand. I've spent a lot of time in and around the bars and I've NEVER seen it happen.

And, further to what sbk says, there are hundreds of sights to see in and around the Thai penninsula. I just happen to prefer Krabi area to the Phuket area.

[ozzieovaseas]

Marks personal experiences may be indicative of the places where HE hangs out, but his generalizations and ridiculous assumptions of why all guys are here is way off.

I think a previous poster asked him where he is situated?..IF he is in Thailand its pretty obvious he hasnt drifted much further than those zones he knows so much about.

So going by his knowledge of "telling the truth that no one else will tell you" then places such as Pattaya,Patong,Nana ect ect are a typical example of Thai society???

And i suppose every second street is same same soi cowboy...?? And all male tourists come just for that??..

Oh yeh, and he seriously thinks the OP runs the risk of loosing her hubby, just from having a holiday here??

Did it ever occur to you that some people have strong relationships without such insecurities and people (with families) do actually come to LOS because it gives them a well priced holiday in a different culture..??

what about people working here..are they all whor€mongering 24/7??

Phew, if ever there was a recipient in dire need of the advice "get a life" it is you dear sir

Oh and the best comment you can come up with to back your claims is "why are there not any single white females travelling here alone

How many single women do you know who'd travel to ANY foriegn country completely alone??

Edited February 12, 2010 by ozzieovaseas

[eurasianthai]

I've seen it with many men, and ladies also. They just attract other people. I don't believe it is the norm,

It is.

[mark45y]

Marks personal experiences may be indicative of the places where HE hangs out, but his generalizations and ridiculous assumptions of why all guys are here is way off.

I think a previous poster asked him where he is situated?..IF he is in Thailand its pretty obvious he hasnt drifted much further than those zones he knows so much about.

So going by his knowledge of "telling the truth that no one else will tell you" then places such as Pattaya,Patong,Nana ect ect are a typical example of Thai society???

And i suppose every second street is same same soi cowboy...?? And all male tourists come just for that??..

Oh yeh, and he seriously thinks the OP runs the risk of loosing her hubby, just from having a holiday here??

Did it ever occur to you that some people have strong relationships without such insecurities and people (with families) do actually come to LOS because it gives them a well priced holiday in a different culture..??

what about people working here..are they all whor€mongering 24/7??

Phew, if ever there was a recipient in dire need of the advice "get a life" it is you dear sir

Oh and the best comment you can come up with to back your claims is "why are there not any single white females travelling here alone

How many single women do you know who'd travel to ANY foriegn country completely alone??

I have never been to Soi Cowboy. I have not been to Nana in 4 years. In the last two years I only visited Pattaya once and that was to see a movie with a friend. I work every day. I am rarely accosted by prostitutes and then only when they are shopping and not in a bar. I don’t drink so I don’t go to bars. Restaurants yes but bars no.

I was single in Thailand for a number of years. A lady moved in with me a year ago. I go to work every day in a town where I don’t live. I do that on purpose. I don’t like my personal life to intersect too closely with my business life although it involves an hour commute every day.

I don’t think you read my post very well. The OP wrote a post because she had heard about all the prostitutes in Thailand. Everyone in the world has heard about all the prostitutes in Thailand. I think I read a post a while back by Misty who said even when she was with her husband he was accosted by prostitutes. You can ask her.

Many men who come to Thailand for the first time are not very worldly. They are used to keeping their eyes downcast when they walk along a crowded street or when interacting with the opposite sex. Thailand is different. Women don’t become upset if you greet them or smile at them. You are not carted off to jail. In fact strangers both men and women sometimes greet other strangers. You can approach the produce lady at the grocery store and ask her out to lunch and she won’t slap you. In fact, maybe she will take you up on your offer. Maybe even she will ask you out to lunch. You can smile at people here and they will not call the cops, they will return your smile and maybe even talk to you. Normal everyday women are more than happy to stop a minute and talk.

This openness among people is often a shock western men and you see the resulting posts of men pleading to find a job so they can stay in Thailand.

You seem to think I am exaggerating about the statistics of men vs. women coming to Thailand from Britain and Australia. I’m not. From Britain and Australia Thailand is a male dominated tourist destination. I personally think it is dangerous for a British or Australian woman to bring a significant other to Thailand. He will see too many mates having too much fun and is bound to ask why all of these guys want to live and/or vacation here.

We went shopping today. Most days at the mall I see at least one and normally two women whom I have known very well. They are almost never alone and neither am I. But somehow during the looking at the shelves of meat, produce and baked goods we find a way to exchange a glance or nod or in some way acknowledge each other. I find it difficult to believe the western women posting on this forum in general don’t know about such things. One of the ladies today was wearing an ankle bracelet that I had given her. She looked down at her ankle when she met my glance and I smiled. That’s all. No plans for future infidelity. I am not a threat to her nor her me. I am still in love with the woman. But it was a short affair, I am not in her league and we both knew that. But it’s Thailand and she gave me a shot and that's one of the reasons I stay here.

[F1fanatic]

lol, yes totally right. Just like I didn't get hit on by a younger hot farang guy on Wednesday night whilst we were surrounded by all the thai women, bg & non who are all prepared to drop draws for him for just being farang???

I actually find it quite offensive to thai women too, to imply that they are all so easy that just they are all waiting to hit on anything western & male.

I suspect it depends on where you live.

Living on Phuket I have to agree with Mark 100% - the women couldn't give a toss whether he's married or not, they WILL hit on anything "Western & male".

Having said that, if you're only here on holiday you should be fine - the women desperately trying trying to take your b/f don't stand a chance as long as you're together.

[GrahamF]

lol, yes totally right. Just like I didn't get hit on by a younger hot farang guy on Wednesday night whilst we were surrounded by all the thai women, bg & non who are all prepared to drop draws for him for just being farang???

I actually find it quite offensive to thai women too, to imply that they are all so easy that just they are all waiting to hit on anything western & male.

I suspect it depends on where you live.

Living on Phuket I have to agree with Mark 100% - the women couldn't give a toss whether he's married or not, they WILL hit on anything "Western & male".

Having said that, if you're only here on holiday you should be fine - the women desperately trying trying to take your b/f don't stand a chance as long as you're together.

F1, are you referring to women on Phuket in general or only the "working ladies?" I think Mark is talking about Thai women in general, of the "non-working" sort.

I am going to agree with Boo that the only real concern that the OP should have is whether or not her bf has a roving eye and might be tempted to go astray. Look at this way though, if he is a cheater, he's going to cheat whether he is Thailand or America, or Britain......etc, etc. It's just easier in Thailand.

I will also agree that I too find Marks comments offensive to Thai women and I am also offended that Mark obviously feels that we Western men cannot keep it in our pants whilst in a relationship. Sure, some can't but there are a lot of us who can. I have been in a number of serious relationships and have never cheated. I actually ended one because I wanted to cheat, for reasons I won't get into here, but I felt I had to end it before I did anything sexual with another woman out of respect to the woman I was with at the time. As I've said before, I'm no angel, but I am not and I think many other Western men are not cheaters.

[sbk]

You seem to think I am exaggerating about the statistics of men vs. women coming to Thailand from Britain and Australia. I’m not. From Britain and Australia Thailand is a male dominated tourist destination.

Back up your "statistics" with facts then please. Anyone can pull a number out of the air.

"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics."

popularized by the inimitable Mark Twain

[StreetCowboy]

For GummyBear:

I hope you had a great holiday, and managed to find at least one post that was helpful and constructive.

Thanks also for starting a thread to give us the opportunity for us all to vent some spleen and flaunt our prejudices.

I doubt we'll get many more on-topic responses from here on...

SC

[IanForbes]

Many men who come to Thailand for the first time are not very worldly. They are used to keeping their eyes downcast when they walk along a crowded street or when interacting with the opposite sex. Thailand is different. Women don't become upset if you greet them or smile at them. You are not carted off to jail. In fact strangers both men and women sometimes greet other strangers. You can approach the produce lady at the grocery store and ask her out to lunch and she won't slap you. In fact, maybe she will take you up on your offer. Maybe even she will ask you out to lunch. You can smile at people here and they will not call the cops, they will return your smile and maybe even talk to you. Normal everyday women are more than happy to stop a minute and talk.

This openness among people is often a shock western men and you see the resulting posts of men pleading to find a job so they can stay in Thailand.

With that part of Mark's post I agree. I can't speak for his personal experiences or the statistics, but I do believe that the tourist industry is male dominated.

It IS an eye opener to western males who visit Thailand for the first time. It is quite acceptible for men to flirt openly with women, providing you do it in a respectful manner. I do it all the time, but I treat everyone with a genuine smile and the occasional joke and I always get a positive response. But, I am comfortable with who I am and don't look down on anyone. I don't do any touching unless they touch me first. Obviously, speech is a barrier if either person can not communicate in the other's language. But, if a farang can speak even the rudimentary Thai language then there is a gold mine of opportunities to meet lovely women he could never hope to be with in wherever he came from.

[Hazo]

Even though everyone is flaming Mark he speaks truth.

I came to Thailand from Australia on a holiday 2 years ago with my (ex) girlfriend. The only country I had been to was NZ so I wasn't worldly informed. I had numerous chicks hitting on me and if it wasn't for her I would have hooked up.

Needless to say we broke up not long after and 2 years later I am moving to Thailand.

FWIW - she was not impressed at all about us going to a ping pong show. We had several massive fights during this trip and it was not fun being with her. I loved everything about the trip, except being in a relationship.

[mark45y]

You seem to think I am exaggerating about the statistics of men vs. women coming to Thailand from Britain and Australia. I’m not. From Britain and Australia Thailand is a male dominated tourist destination.

Back up your "statistics" with facts then please. Anyone can pull a number out of the air.

"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics."

popularized by the inimitable Mark Twain

Australia to Thailand twice as many men as women. The UK slightly more than that. UK adjusted for tour groups and conventions and medical visits it works out to about 500,000 men and 100,000 women. TAT 2007. Single men vs. single women, could not find any data.

Ex pats or long stay tourists I could not find the data broken down by gender.

I could not find anything to really alter my opinion that as a holiday destination Thailand remains a Disneyland designed by drunken sailors with enough photo ops to send pics home and tell your friends you are here because you like Thai food and to see the temples.

But all in all I do agree with Mark Twain that statistics are another form of lying. I would instead look at the Anglo couple walking down the street with the male glassy eyed and the female with a terminal frown.

I would also add the caveat that the females posting on Thaivisa are a cut above the normal female tourist in experience, knowledge and world travel and may not see things in the same light as the average traveler.