alvino Posted June 25, 2005 Share Posted June 25, 2005 An elderly couple, sitting together watching television. During one of "those" commercials, the husband asked his wife, "Whatever happened to our sexual relations?" After a long thoughtful silence, the wife replied during the next commercial, "You know, I don't know. I don't even think we got a Christmas card from them this year!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayo Posted June 25, 2005 Share Posted June 25, 2005 He! Reminds me of an old joke about a man who for years and years begged his wife for a blowjob, to no avail. One day hubbie ups and dies. After his body has been cremated, wife puts the ashes out of the urn and on to the garden table. She then proceeeds to blow the ashes out into the wind, the garden. "There you go love. You finally get you Blow job" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drummer Posted June 25, 2005 Share Posted June 25, 2005 So an old couple George and Martha - both about 90 years old, are having a torrid love affair in their nursing home. Well, torrid maybe isn't the right word... Each Tuesday, they meet in the TV lounge where she holds his sausage for about half an hour. Its not that much, but they're both 90- iots more than most of their compatriots get, so their happy. Anyway, one day he doesn't show up - doesn't show up for 3 weeks in a row. Martha just thinks he kicked the bucket until she sees him hobbling down the hallway - at which opint she flips - she says "George! where the ###### have you been? I thought you died!" George says "Well, I hate to tell you, but I've found another woman." Martha: "I knew it - she's younger, prettier, shes" George stops her there saying "actually, she's 102 and is confined to a wheelchair." Martha: Well, What does she have that I don't have???" George: "Parkinsons" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alvino Posted June 25, 2005 Author Share Posted June 25, 2005 More nursing home humour Jack says to Sarah, "We have been in this nursing home together for yers now, and you know I want to be with you. I'm 87 and most likely don't have much more time. Let's make love tonight." Sarah, who is 81 herself, thinks a minute and says, "OK, be in my room at 7:30." When Jack arrives in Sarah's room, she is sitting on her bed topless, and says to him, "see these pills on my night table? They are for my acute angina." Jack answers, "Thank heavens, because your boobs look terrible." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mnoorsapl Posted June 26, 2005 Share Posted June 26, 2005 you guys are funny. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IvanLaw Posted June 26, 2005 Share Posted June 26, 2005 He! Reminds me of an old joke about a man who for years and years begged his wife for a blowjob, to no avail. One day hubbie ups and dies. After his body has been cremated, wife puts the ashes out of the urn and on to the garden table. She then proceeeds to blow the ashes out into the wind, the garden. "There you go love. You finally get you Blow job" <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Overheard at work This BL**DY PC goes down on me more than the wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayo Posted June 27, 2005 Share Posted June 27, 2005 He! Reminds me of an old joke about a man who for years and years begged his wife for a blowjob, to no avail. One day hubbie ups and dies. After his body has been cremated, wife puts the ashes out of the urn and on to the garden table. She then proceeeds to blow the ashes out into the wind, the garden. "There you go love. You finally get you Blow job" <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Overheard at work This BL**DY PC goes down on me more than the wife. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Also, "This PC costs me less than my wife, does more for me, and is actually somewhat resourceful." "I feel more connected with my PC than my wife" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mnoorsapl Posted June 27, 2005 Share Posted June 27, 2005 He! Reminds me of an old joke about a man who for years and years begged his wife for a blowjob, to no avail. One day hubbie ups and dies. After his body has been cremated, wife puts the ashes out of the urn and on to the garden table. She then proceeeds to blow the ashes out into the wind, the garden. "There you go love. You finally get you Blow job" <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Overheard at work This BL**DY PC goes down on me more than the wife. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Also, "This PC costs me less than my wife, does more for me, and is actually somewhat resourceful." "I feel more connected with my PC than my wife" <{POST_SNAPBACK}> But gettin' inter-connected with me GF should be more fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jai Dee Posted June 29, 2005 Share Posted June 29, 2005 This BL**DY PC goes down on me more than the wife. I think tukyleith has got that as his signature... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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