Eight Month Old Infant

[Chunky1]

I am in a tough situation. My wife has recently started to develop some troubling symptoms. I would expect that with the infant 8 months old, things should start getting easier but for her they have gotten harder.

The symptoms which have just recently started:

1. Has a very hard time eating and drinking enough

2. Feels light-headed, has headaches often

3. Is overly paranoid about everything

4. Has developed low blood pressure

5. Has little energy

6. hair loss (this is common)

Perhaps because the baby is still breast feeding and consuming more milk, it is further tiring her out??

I try to nag her about drinking and eating and resting more but it usually results in her getting angry and yelling at me. She has become very passive aggressive and it often results in me biting my fist. I often have more luck getting the baby to eat then I do getting her to eat. When I suggest going to a doctor for a checkup, as you will probably guess, she balks at this idea. So I am stuck in the classic position of caring about a person who has something wrong with them/needs help but is refusing to receive it.

Is it normal for drastic hormonal changes to occur this far after pregnancy. Every Thai doctor I have seen is very lazy so if I am able to get her to see one, I want to have a set game plan of what tests need to be done and not just hear the rhetoric about eat, sleep and drink more with her nodding along and then refusing to later that night.

I know that raising an infant is very hard work and I just want to get my wife's body the medical help it needs. Suggestions welcome. Thanks.

[onnut]

My wife was told to stop breast feeding at 6 months because it was zapping her energy.

When is the next time you have to take your baby for a check up? This will be a good opportunity to go with and talk to the Dr who took care of the birth.

[bina]

first: i will move this , i think, to family section although can also be health... it may be a combination of health and family stuff;

second: thai women need to have other women from the family to approach her. not u. women tend to listen more to their grannies or sisters or friends rather then husbands whom are not expected to know what a woman is feeling at any given time especially when mother/baby is sort of one entity.

two. some of the symptoms are yes, hormonal, which may be causing mood swings, anorexia (lack of appetite), hair loss, gneral moodiness etc.

can also be post partum problems that are beyond the usual hormonal stuff.

low blood pressure/anemia due to lack of drinking /eating ; i found breast feeding draining, i lost weight, i could never eat enough, baby ate every two hours for 6! months . some women lose their appetite when breast feeding. im one of them.

there are mother/child sites in thai on internet if she uses internet. if not, there are magazines that have lots of articles, even simple ones for mothers/babies, maybe give her some subliminal help...

pushing to go to doctor may create more stress...

if she is dieting for whatever reason then that would cause the tiredness and the lack of appetite is a circular process of chicken and egg then... most babies at 8 months are drinking less milk as they are starting to eat solids, even the most ardent of breastfeeders usually go with the process of baby asking for food, and giving food therefore the amount of milk reduces a bit, as well as the richness of the milk although after stopping the breastfeeding i personally felt suddenly a burst of energy...

and no, it never gets easier... just different...

bina

israel

[BuddhistDruid]

I admit our twins only came home from the hospital about 10 days ago, so I may not be in a good position to answer your question, but I will try to offer what help I can.

First, my research has led me to the conclusion that the efficiency of breastfeeding after 6 months of age suffers a dramatic decline. While it does provide nourishment for the child, there are possibly better ways of obtaining those same calories in a less taxing form for both the baby and the mother. At 8 months the babies own immune system should be strong enough that he doesn't need the boost from the mother. Also, a woman who is breastfeeding needs to consume about 500 calories a day more than a woman who is not breastfeeding. I would assume your wife is not anywhere close to this from your description.

All this taken together would lead me to the conclusion that it is now time to stop breastfeeding your baby. After a short period of adjustment this should have every bit the same effect on your wife as increasing her food intake.

Rather than worrying about this from the perspective of a medical professional, I would take the position now of caring husband. Stop the breastfeeding, leave the baby with grandmother or anothr caring relative for a few days, and take your wife to a nice resort somewhere that she can get away from her duties as a mother.  Take her to some nice restaurants and relax on beach. Remind her of why you married her in the first place, and when she is feeling like a woman again rather than just a mother, tell her how much you care and explain you could never forgive yourself if something happened to her. I suspect she would be more receptive to your concerns under those circumstances. As you note, caring for an infant is very hard work. I've only had about 10 days experience at it and I'm exhausted.  Getting her some rest and changing her perspective might be all that is required.

I don't know if this will actually help, but I sincerely doubt it could hurt. The symptoms you describe could get very serious if they continue for any length of time.

[ilyelol]

1) get her off a thai diet, thai food doesnt even bring enough nutriments and calories throughout the day for a normal person.

2) consult a good phamarcian about natural energy herbs that wont affect the milk(or check wikipedia)

put her on a pasta/meat/mashed potatoes diet for a while

[bkkjames]

My mrs needs to consume 2000 calories a day  - between the breastfeeding and chasing our son all over the place, it takes it's toll.

That being the case, she can achieve her dietary needs by me getting her the food she likes to eat. As Thais are notorious snackers, keep a lot of things around the fridge that are 'easy' to consume without much effort. While it's noble to think that only fruits and other healthy items would be the way to go, in addition to these don't be afraid to supplement this with less healthy options (aka some fast food, chips, chocolate, cheese etc).