Chiangmai Friends

[richard10365]

It was a great party and if you missed it, there will be another next year about this time. I believe this one was larger than the last one so the next one should be much bigger! I felt quite proud to be part of the group last night. It was an awesome event!

[CobraSnakeNecktie]

was there any news worth summarizing from the various speakers?

govt initiatives? development plans? air pollution or traffic safety programs? etc?

[SwaziBird]

was there any news worth summarizing from the various speakers?

govt initiatives? development plans? air pollution or traffic safety programs? etc?

It was a party - a celebration - and an excellent one at that.

Cheers.

Edited January 23, 2011 by SwaziBird

[anselpixel]

Just for the record, I'm not one to spend a lot of time seeking out expats for conversation.

The ones I met outside organized social settings were without exception friendly, and usually interesting people.

The attitude manifest in the letter originally quoted was my point of reference for saying a certain amount of condescension and latent hostility appeared to be endemic to the Thai population of Chiang Mai, and I hasten to add that's their perfect right. It's just not something I'd consider a selling point.

I'm one of those who got caught up in the CMU Thai language program debacle, and perhaps my irretrievable loss of time and money colored my experience. I just had no prior experience with such treatment, and it left a bad impression. A local Thai academic and psychologist whom I talked to about it recommended I accept that much of CM life is a private club, with the university being no exception.

I did make a few forays into both the expat and local social scenes. Selling was the order of the day. Period.

If someone can attend meetings of the Expats Club and not notice, I'm not sure why.

As I said, Chiang Mai is a very lovely town for a few months of the year, and well worth the visit.

That I wouldn't want to live there full time isn't unique to CM: I don't really know of any one place I'd want to live every day of the year.

[caf]

Clubs can be a bit commercial here; and as you say it is odd that people don't see it

The original arrogant style of the email did not help

[Mapguy]

I had only glanced at this thread before. Tonight, I read the whole thing. My goodness!!

Can't see how OP didn't realize he'd start a ruckus, but he has apologized. In my view, it is an odd letter indeed --- a troll, perhaps --- and not one that I can imagine Khun Boong would have written or sanctioned, but she can't control all "over-enthusiastic" admirers, if it was genuine. I can speculate that she might get somewhat nervous about potential rudeness of some guests at a large party who wouldn't (in or out of their cups) understand that there's a time and place for everything. UG was right on to point out that some farang behavior is not only tiresome, but downright rude --- really, just as boorish behavior would be considered "back home." I have noticed a fair number of Thais have checked the group out over the years and not returned. Sad!

The party itself was a big success. The regular meetings are smaller, some with interesting speakers, some not. Yes, there is some but not overwhelming commercial interest, not just by Thai attendees but also farang. The most egregious case of this in my experience was an appalling farang speaker trying to sell his talents. That was some time ago.

The group was started to try to get away from the "almost only" farang Chiang Mai Expats Club (where commercialization, by the way, is full-blown!). As well, the purpose of CMF from the beginning has been to do "something useful" in the community. Pretty minor things, really, at first, but lately the group has begun to get more serious about that angle. The group is also much better organized than before. It remains to see how that works out.

This kind of group clearly is not everyone's cup of tea. If it grows larger, it will attract a greater variety of characters. I for one hope that they don't leave their manners at home and bring good will with them.

If interested, I'll send you some contact information. I don't think I can post that sort of thing here. You'd have to PM me.

[elektrified]

Do people really move to Thailand, to get involved with organisations like these?

Not I. I attended a Chiang Mai Expat meeting once and asked a friend to join me. It was excruciating. Not only was i looking at the clock every couple of minutes, which I thought must have been broken, I had to pay for the beating. Is the "Friends" group in the same vein?

Ditto, painful indeed and the CMF thing looks absolutely awful too.

I think if I had to succumb to spending my time in these places, it would most definitely be a signal that it's time to leave.

Ditto.

Edited February 1, 2011 by elektrified

[venturalaw]

I had only glanced at this thread before. Tonight, I read the whole thing. My goodness!!

Can't see how OP didn't realize he'd start a ruckus, but he has apologized. In my view, it is an odd letter indeed --- a troll, perhaps --- and not one that I can imagine Khun Boong would have written or sanctioned, but she can't control all "over-enthusiastic" admirers, if it was genuine. I can speculate that she might get somewhat nervous about potential rudeness of some guests at a large party who wouldn't (in or out of their cups) understand that there's a time and place for everything. UG was right on to point out that some farang behavior is not only tiresome, but downright rude --- really, just as boorish behavior would be considered "back home." I have noticed a fair number of Thais have checked the group out over the years and not returned. Sad!

The party itself was a big success. The regular meetings are smaller, some with interesting speakers, some not. Yes, there is some but not overwhelming commercial interest, not just by Thai attendees but also farang. The most egregious case of this in my experience was an appalling farang speaker trying to sell his talents. That was some time ago.

The group was started to try to get away from the "almost only" farang Chiang Mai Expats Club (where commercialization, by the way, is full-blown!). As well, the purpose of CMF from the beginning has been to do "something useful" in the community. Pretty minor things, really, at first, but lately the group has begun to get more serious about that angle. The group is also much better organized than before. It remains to see how that works out.

This kind of group clearly is not everyone's cup of tea. If it grows larger, it will attract a greater variety of characters. I for one hope that they don't leave their manners at home and bring good will with them.

If interested, I'll send you some contact information. I don't think I can post that sort of thing here. You'd have to PM me.

A very accurate representation of what CMF is all about. Unfortunately, and all too often, a few TV posters jump in to criticize, in this case an organization, about which they have no first-hand knowledge. Their purpose is not to inform, but merely to condemn.

Edited February 2, 2011 by venturalaw

[richard10365]

Do people really move to Thailand, to get involved with organisations like these?

Not I. I attended a Chiang Mai Expat meeting once and asked a friend to join me. It was excruciating. Not only was i looking at the clock every couple of minutes, which I thought must have been broken, I had to pay for the beating. Is the "Friends" group in the same vein?

Ditto, painful indeed and the CMF thing looks absolutely awful too.

I think if I had to succumb to spending my time in these places, it would most definitely be a signal that it's time to leave.

Ditto.

I like the CMFG. Nice people, nice food and they do nice things. If the CMFG does not seem like the kind of group you like to hang out with then that's your choice. Chiang Mai is a wonderful city. There is a lot to do here. I hope you can find some place that makes you happy.

[caf]

I had only glanced at this thread before. Tonight, I read the whole thing. My goodness!!

Can't see how OP didn't realize he'd start a ruckus, but he has apologized. In my view, it is an odd letter indeed --- a troll, perhaps --- and not one that I can imagine Khun Boong would have written or sanctioned, but she can't control all "over-enthusiastic" admirers, if it was genuine. I can speculate that she might get somewhat nervous about potential rudeness of some guests at a large party who wouldn't (in or out of their cups) understand that there's a time and place for everything. UG was right on to point out that some farang behavior is not only tiresome, but downright rude --- really, just as boorish behavior would be considered "back home." I have noticed a fair number of Thais have checked the group out over the years and not returned. Sad!

The party itself was a big success. The regular meetings are smaller, some with interesting speakers, some not. Yes, there is some but not overwhelming commercial interest, not just by Thai attendees but also farang. The most egregious case of this in my experience was an appalling farang speaker trying to sell his talents. That was some time ago.

The group was started to try to get away from the "almost only" farang Chiang Mai Expats Club (where commercialization, by the way, is full-blown!). As well, the purpose of CMF from the beginning has been to do "something useful" in the community. Pretty minor things, really, at first, but lately the group has begun to get more serious about that angle. The group is also much better organized than before. It remains to see how that works out.

This kind of group clearly is not everyone's cup of tea. If it grows larger, it will attract a greater variety of characters. I for one hope that they don't leave their manners at home and bring good will with them.

If interested, I'll send you some contact information. I don't think I can post that sort of thing here. You'd have to PM me.

Yes, the op apologised for stirring matters. But cmf has never apologised. The writer, and it certainly was not Boong (as I wrote before)did not declare who he was but the consensus is that he is an official of the "club" and neither an "over enthusiastic admirer" or a troll. His words were totally out of order.

The original email was threatening, as one poster commented, and the assertion that there were trouble makers aiming to spoil the event seems to have been a complete fabrication. It is interesting that there was no subsequent talk of that, only of the actual party.

I agree about rudeness and boorishness as a generalisation but it is a red herring here. The original email made no justification and gave no evidence of it. It was an anti-farang defamation.

"Clubs' in Thailand are run as commercial operations, very differently from the West. But there is nothing wrong with that if that is the way they want to do it. It is a Thai thing and I have no problem with it - merely an observation. Personally I prefer the Western concept. I do find it a little insulting to one's intelligence to suggest that money is not the overriding factor

[caf]

I had only glanced at this thread before. Tonight, I read the whole thing. My goodness!!

Can't see how OP didn't realize he'd start a ruckus, but he has apologized. In my view, it is an odd letter indeed --- a troll, perhaps --- and not one that I can imagine Khun Boong would have written or sanctioned, but she can't control all "over-enthusiastic" admirers, if it was genuine. I can speculate that she might get somewhat nervous about potential rudeness of some guests at a large party who wouldn't (in or out of their cups) understand that there's a time and place for everything. UG was right on to point out that some farang behavior is not only tiresome, but downright rude --- really, just as boorish behavior would be considered "back home." I have noticed a fair number of Thais have checked the group out over the years and not returned. Sad!

The party itself was a big success. The regular meetings are smaller, some with interesting speakers, some not. Yes, there is some but not overwhelming commercial interest, not just by Thai attendees but also farang. The most egregious case of this in my experience was an appalling farang speaker trying to sell his talents. That was some time ago.

The group was started to try to get away from the "almost only" farang Chiang Mai Expats Club (where commercialization, by the way, is full-blown!). As well, the purpose of CMF from the beginning has been to do "something useful" in the community. Pretty minor things, really, at first, but lately the group has begun to get more serious about that angle. The group is also much better organized than before. It remains to see how that works out.

This kind of group clearly is not everyone's cup of tea. If it grows larger, it will attract a greater variety of characters. I for one hope that they don't leave their manners at home and bring good will with them.

If interested, I'll send you some contact information. I don't think I can post that sort of thing here. You'd have to PM me.

A very accurate representation of what CMF is all about. Unfortunately, and all too often, a few TV posters jump in to criticize, in this case an organization, about which they have no first-hand knowledge. Their purpose is not to inform, but merely to condemn.

Again, venturalaw, not an even handed comment. There may be some "bruisers" always looking for a fight on TV and condemning for the sake of it. But that happens on all threads, doesn't it?

But some posters are posting from their own knowledge and have justified their points of view.

[caf]

quote

Ditto, painful indeed and the CMF thing looks absolutely awful too.

I think if I had to succumb to spending my time in these places, it would most definitely be a signal that it's time to leave.

Ditto.

I like the CMFG. Nice people, nice food and they do nice things. If the CMFG does not seem like the kind of group you like to hang out with then that's your choice. Chiang Mai is a wonderful city. There is a lot to do here. I hope you can find some place that makes you happy.

---------------------

Completely agree apart from your last sentence. People can like Chiangmai, they can elect to stay here, but do not have to "find some place that makes them happy" just because they don't like a particular club. Your last sentence has the same ring to it as in the original email suggesting people go to the nearest airport. Let expats here decide and don't denigrate those who hold a different view to yours.

[richard10365]

CAF,

Let me make things clear for you. I like hanging out with the group. I enjoy their company. But that doesn't mean that I am some kind of pushover when it comes to me being me. I am not Thai. I did not grow up in this environment. I grew up in the southern United States. I'm redneck by nature. If there is something I don't like, you can be sure I am going to say something about it.

You keep responding to this thread like you are looking to start a fight. You want us to be rude to you so you can jump up on your internet high horse and talk about what a rude group we really are. Why you want to do that I am not sure. Your petty little attacks at the group are getting a bid old and stale.

Personally, I can care less if you like or don't like the group. I can care even less why. I am completely bored with what you are saying over and over and over like a bad record skipping on a scratch. If you don't like the group, then avoid it. You don't have to be part of it. I would prefer to only have people there who want to be there. Those that don't like it are free to explore the universe at their leisure.

Get a life. Go out and find a hobby. Go fishing. Go see a movie. Have a coke and a smile!

I hope this rude and in your face response is the response you have desperately craved since this thread opened. Have a nice day. :jap:

[elektrified]

I like the CMFG. Nice people, nice food and they do nice things. If the CMFG does not seem like the kind of group you like to hang out with then that's your choice. Chiang Mai is a wonderful city. There is a lot to do here. I hope you can find some place that makes you happy.

The above was in reference to another ex-pats club. Not the one you are talking about. The one I commented on was like a meeting at a retirement home. Not that there is anything wrong with retirees, some of my best friends in C.M. are retirees.

There are plenty of places here that make me happy, thank you for your concern. I never really understood why people would choose to move to a foreign country yet want to attend meetings where only other ex-pats are in attendance. Maybe they miss home or the company of other farangs -- I don't know.

oops sorry -- there is no 'above'. Not sure what happened there but I was referring to post #99.

Edited February 2, 2011 by elektrified

[richard10365]

I like the CMFG. Nice people, nice food and they do nice things. If the CMFG does not seem like the kind of group you like to hang out with then that's your choice. Chiang Mai is a wonderful city. There is a lot to do here. I hope you can find some place that makes you happy.

The above was in reference to another ex-pats club. Not the one you are talking about. The one I commented on was like a meeting at a retirement home. Not that there is anything wrong with retirees, some of my best friends in C.M. are retirees.

There are plenty of places here that make me happy, thank you for your concern. I never really understood why people would choose to move to a foreign country yet want to attend meetings where only other ex-pats are in attendance. Maybe they miss home or the company of other farangs -- I don't know.

oops sorry -- there is no 'above'. Not sure what happened there but I was referring to post #99.

Sorry..I don't always read through the quotes. My bad. I see your point about attending meetings with only ex-pats. Meetings are more diverse with a mixed group. Perhaps the retired folk have similar things in common and are able to help each other out with their problems.

[Ulysses G.]

It is not easy for some people to make friends here that they have something in common with. Maybe these meetings heighten their chances of doing so?

[elektrified]

I like the CMFG. Nice people, nice food and they do nice things. If the CMFG does not seem like the kind of group you like to hang out with then that's your choice. Chiang Mai is a wonderful city. There is a lot to do here. I hope you can find some place that makes you happy.

The above was in reference to another ex-pats club. Not the one you are talking about. The one I commented on was like a meeting at a retirement home. Not that there is anything wrong with retirees, some of my best friends in C.M. are retirees.

There are plenty of places here that make me happy, thank you for your concern. I never really understood why people would choose to move to a foreign country yet want to attend meetings where only other ex-pats are in attendance. Maybe they miss home or the company of other farangs -- I don't know.

oops sorry -- there is no 'above'. Not sure what happened there but I was referring to post #99.

Sorry..I don't always read through the quotes. My bad. I see your point about attending meetings with only ex-pats. Meetings are more diverse with a mixed group. Perhaps the retired folk have similar things in common and are able to help each other out with their problems.

Yes I think you are probably right about that. It's good that there is something for everybody.

[WinnieTheKhwai]

It is not easy for some people to make friends here that they have something in common with. Maybe these meetings heighten their chances of doing so?

Well.. why is that even a goal, to make friends with people you have something in common with. One of the nice things about Chiang Mai is that there's a smaller pool of potential friends, which gets even smaller when you leave out the complete wackjob asstards, and people who are trying to make money off you with all kinds of sad spiels. You will find that the handful of straight, sane people you're left with have a completely different background, age and interests from yourself. But that is kind of refreshing; you learn new things that way and gain new experiences you otherwise wouldn't have had if you only hang out with people that have lots of things in common with you.

Edited February 2, 2011 by WinnieTheKhwai

[venturalaw]

It is not easy for some people to make friends here that they have something in common with. Maybe these meetings heighten their chances of doing so?

Well.. why is that even a goal, to make friends with people you have something in common with. One of the nice things about Chiang Mai is that there's a smaller pool of potential friends, which gets even smaller when you leave out the complete wackjob asstards, and people who are trying to make money off you with all kinds of sad spiels. You will find that the handful of straight, sane people you're left with have a completely different background, age and interests from yourself. But that is kind of refreshing; you learn new things that way and gain new experiences you otherwise wouldn't have had if you only hang out with people that have lots of things in common with you.

A clear illustration of someone posting argument solely for the purpose of being argumentative rather than contributing. Obviously there is a difference between seeking out people with whom one has SOMETHING in common as oppose to seeking out people with whom one has LOTS of things in common. WinnieTheKhwai do you require an example, or will this expanation suffice?

Edited February 2, 2011 by venturalaw

[WinnieTheKhwai]

Huh.. the above is honest opinion.

And factually true; I challenge anyone to look around in their circle of friends and ask themselves: Would I even have met or talked to most of these people if I lived back home?

Obviously there is a difference between seeking out people with whom one has SOMETHING in common as oppose to seeking out people with whom one has LOTS of things in common.

Something in common... same species, same number of chromosomes perhaps, ability to communicate in a shared language that may or may not be English.. but it ends shortly thereafter. Different ages, nationalities, interests.. different everything.

Edited February 2, 2011 by WinnieTheKhwai

[koheesti]

I would say that for most foreigners, moving thousands of miles from home to live in Thailand in the first place shows they aren't afraid to be around people who aren't like themselves so what's wrong with seeking out someone you have more in common with?

[WinnieTheKhwai]

I would say that for most foreigners, moving thousands of miles from home to live in Thailand in the first place shows they aren't afraid to be around people who aren't like themselves so what's wrong with seeking out someone you have more in common with?

I can't stand people who are like me.

(Variation of: I wouldn't want to join a club that would accept me as a member. )

[venturalaw]

I would say that for most foreigners, moving thousands of miles from home to live in Thailand in the first place shows they aren't afraid to be around people who aren't like themselves so what's wrong with seeking out someone you have more in common with?

I can't stand people who are like me.

(Variation of: I wouldn't want to join a club that would accept me as a member. )

Understood.

[Ulysses G.]

It is not easy for some people to make friends here that they have something in common with. Maybe these meetings heighten their chances of doing so?

Well.. why is that even a goal, to make friends with people you have something in common with.

What I was really trying to say - while not being too blunt about it - is that some people have difficulty making friends - full stop - and might have a better chance of meeting someone to socialize with at this kind of meeting.

Of course, that does not apply to all the members, but could explain why some folks want to go to functions with mostly Westerners that they can easily communicate with.

[richard10365]

Are we talking about the Chiang Mai Friends Group or another club. I made this mistake earlier.

[Ulysses G.]

I am talking about such clubs in general - if that helps.