Boater Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 KHAO SAN ROAD – Local bar and nightspot Gulliver’s Travelers Tavern celebrated a major milestone Saturday by serving its one-millionth asshol_e.At approximately 11:32 PM, a large Chang beer was provided to Eric Crosser, a 27-year-old New Zealander who sleeps with Thai women who are obviously prostitutes but then refuses to pay them because no explicit commercial agreement was made. The serving of the beer to Crosser represents the millionth time that the establishment has served an alcoholic beverage to an asshol_e since its opening in 1995. “We’re proud of our heritage as Khao San Road’s favorite gathering place for the world’s <deleted>,” said night-shift manager Nod Bamhariyang. “Having served a million of them from over 60 countries, we can truly declare that Gulliver’s is the asshol_e capital of Bangkok. Possibly all of Asia.” According to Nod, the top asshol_e-nationalities are the UK, the US and Israel. However, Russia and China have provided the most asshol_e-growth in the last year. Nod attributes Gulliver’s unique success to its careful formula of asshol_e-attracting qualities, including cheap shitty Western food, décor that mimics the asshol_e’s natural environment back home, and a balance of sleaziness and pretensions of sophistication which appeals to the asshol_e’s refusal to admit he’s an asshol_e. “Whatever asshol_e activity appeals to you, whether it’s shouting at TV sports, acting cool and detached while shooting pool, or nursing a single Bt90 beer for two hours while hoping to score a freebie with a downmarket freelancer bargirl at 1:45 am, Gulliver’s is the place for you,” she added. Gulliver’s other branches at Sukhumvit and Pattaya have also attracted their share of <deleted>, but the Khao San branch is by far the leader. “Sukhumvit caters more to the quiet, middle-aged lifers, while our Pattaya establishment does a brisk trade in nutjobs and creeps,” said Nod. “But on Khao San Road, it’s all asshol_e, all the time.” As a prize for being the 1,000,000th asshol_e served at Gulliver’s, Crosser received a free Bt5,000 voucher for stitches and first-aid treatment at Bangkok Mission Hospital for the next time he gets punched in the face for being an asshol_e. http://notthenation.com/2011/04/gulliver%e2%80%99s-serves-1000000th-asshol_e/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nonthaburial Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Bordering on Libel I would suggest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Bordering on Libel I would suggest Let the Thai judge visit for an evening and make his ruling. I know where my money will be resting.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boater Posted April 29, 2011 Author Share Posted April 29, 2011 Bordering on Libel I would suggest Let the Thai judge visit for an evening and make his ruling. I know where my money will be resting.... not really, they are suggesting the clients, and not the estblishemnt it's self, also it is satire ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeavyDrinker Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 It's not satire. It's crap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nawtier Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 stupid thread really. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardholder Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Six posts, the Mods must be asleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUDAS Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Quality Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krading Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Never been in the joint, does that mean I'm not an ars@hole? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nawtier Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nawtier Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 doh...11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boater Posted April 29, 2011 Author Share Posted April 29, 2011 its in the pub section..... not to be taken to serouisly ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 its in the pub section..... not to be taken to serouisly ! Let's have a poll.....funny or not and nationality. Doubt the results would be surprising. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DP25 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 nursing a single Bt90 beer for two hours while hoping to score a freebie with a downmarket freelancer bargirl at 1:45 am Who does that? Those street vendors selling large Chang are just down the soi, you can have the girl watch your 90 baht beer and while you go down one of those Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transam Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Brilliant, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carmine Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokie36 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 nursing a single Bt90 beer for two hours while hoping to score a freebie with a downmarket freelancer bargirl at 1:45 am Who does that? Those street vendors selling large Chang are just down the soi, you can have the girl watch your 90 baht beer and while you go down one of those This is a truly magnificent post. Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IanForbes Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 nursing a single Bt90 beer for two hours while hoping to score a freebie with a downmarket freelancer bargirl at 1:45 am Who does that? Those street vendors selling large Chang are just down the soi, you can have the girl watch your 90 baht beer and while you go down one of those This is a truly magnificent post. Thank you. X2 Good one, Boater.:jap: I love satire and this post nails it.. It's like black humor, or the people who say "I'm BAD!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tatsujin Posted April 30, 2011 Share Posted April 30, 2011 Funny . . . but i would think "Gullivers" might have something to say about this . . . look for "Boater" in the local Thai Courts soon <smiles> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xen Posted April 30, 2011 Share Posted April 30, 2011 I thought it was very funny but the name of the eatablisment and nationalities could be changed according to your current shit-list preferences. I actually thought it was more an indictment on Khao San Road, not one of my favourite Thailand locations. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeslice Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 I've have been feeling a bit homesick lately..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forethat Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 looool Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
draggons Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 Made me chuckle, nice one Boater Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocturn Posted May 11, 2011 Share Posted May 11, 2011 i am astonished at the inability of the board in general to recognize satire. obtuse doesn't even cover it. libel indeed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tatsujin Posted May 12, 2011 Share Posted May 12, 2011 i am astonished at the inability of the board in general to recognize satire. obtuse doesn't even cover it. libel indeed I would be more concerned whether the "Thai's" would recognize it as satire since we are living in Thailand and operate under their libel laws . . . satire is not a word in their dictionary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nawtier Posted May 12, 2011 Share Posted May 12, 2011 i am astonished at the inability of the board in general to recognize satire. obtuse doesn't even cover it. libel indeed The idea is to make it funny so people can recognise it........Fail. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.png.3b3332cc2256ad0edbc2fe9404feeef0.png)
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now