Romance In Isaan

[rgs2001uk]

well i am not looking for a good time or a bit of holiday fun. i do like her.

like i said i just want an idea of what is going to be expected of me, but thanks

There's still plenty of other options in Thailand but most of what's been mentioned is still expected. I'd be suspect of the "quiet" side of her you mention, sometimes that can be a red flag and maybe you'd want to consider not having any hogs or ducks on your future farm together ..

not really sure what you mean by the hogs or ducks thing

I and no doubt others reading this know exactly what he means.

I suggest until you know, tread lightly and make no commitments.

I find it almost unbelievable an uneducated 27 year living in the back of beyond hasnt been married

before and there arent children somewhere.

Did you check the back of her legs or see her stomach?

What exactly are you comparing this girl to, whats the benchmark, how many other Thai women have you been involved with?

What is this girl bringing to the table, what baggage does she have in tow?

Can you afford to pay for land the family already own just for the privelege of building a house you can never own?

You may not be thinking that far ahead but I can guarantee her family is.

As others have said too many to choose from.

[WarpSpeed]

well i am not looking for a good time or a bit of holiday fun. i do like her.

like i said i just want an idea of what is going to be expected of me, but thanks

There's still plenty of other options in Thailand but most of what's been mentioned is still expected. I'd be suspect of the "quiet" side of her you mention, sometimes that can be a red flag and maybe you'd want to consider not having any hogs or ducks on your future farm together ..

not really sure what you mean by the hogs or ducks thing

I and no doubt others reading this know exactly what he means.

I suggest until you know, tread lightly and make no commitments.

I find it almost unbelievable an uneducated 27 year living in the back of beyond hasnt been married

before and there arent children somewhere.

Did you check the back of her legs or see her stomach?

What exactly are you comparing this girl to, whats the benchmark, how many other Thai women have you been involved with?

What is this girl bringing to the table, what baggage does she have in tow?

Can you afford to pay for land the family already own just for the privelege of building a house you can never own?

You may not be thinking that far ahead but I can guarantee her family is.

As others have said too many to choose from.

Wot he says......

[SlyAnimal]

Your situation sounds similar to mine

e.g. you're 30, met a 27 year old country girl and got on well with her. Then the parents want you to get married or engaged or something and make a commitment. Only difference is, my girl is 25, whereas I'm 29, she has a bachelor's degree and can speak English (So Sin Sod would go up by a lot), and I actually live close to her village already (prior to meeting her) where I teach English.

When I first started coming over for dinner / lunch pretty much every day, there weren't any problems. However people in the village started to gossip and start asking her mum when we were getting married. Because in conservative Isaan, you don't have a man come to visit a woman at her house for dinner etc unless you're going to get married soon. Likewise we were seen holding hands once or twice in public too, so people were 100% sure that we were getting married soon, because why would you hold hands unless you were getting married soon right?

So to stop the gossip, we elected to get engaged and so I spoke to her mum about the Sin Sod, and what "Down payment" would be made on the Sin Sod when we got engaged. What basically eventuated, was that I could get engaged and pay a low % of the Sin Sod, and appease gossip but not really get much additional freedom compared to when we were just bf/gf. So what I offered, was to pay a much higher % of the Sin Sod instead, and then have more freedom. As callous as it sounds, to think of selling your daughter, it is a bit about that, also having a high Sin Sod paid gains the family a lot of respect in the community. As a result, if you have more freedom with a girl, then she essentially becomes "damaged goods" as far as the community is concerned, and any future wedding would have a significantly lower Sin Sod (if at all), so you need to pay a higher amount to get more freedom.

My gf thought that the Sin Sod which you'd pay in total, would be around 100,000 Baht, give or take a little. Although they will probably also ask you to pay more for "Show", which will then be given back to you, as it will raise the respect within the community for the family. If the family ask for more than that, then they might indeed just see you as a walking ATM, imo get out while you can, as 100k is a lot for an uneducated 27 year old ugly girl (Remember that she's probably never been married because Thai guys don't think she's pretty, with a 3:1 ratio they can afford to be picky, and they don't like girls with dark/tan skin and small noses).

Likewise, the Sin Sod (And any down payment at engagement as well) will usually be given back to you anyway (Well given to your gf/wife anyway, to do with as she pleases. In my case, my gf used it to repay her mother's debts and take out some life insurance policies on her mother).

As for how much money you give her and her family each month, that'll be upto you. I give my gf a lot (15k per month), because I don't want her to work, so that she has time to look after me, and because I wanted a figure whereby she can save money each month. Then if her family want to borrow money, they can borrow directly from her, rather than from me, which should make repayments a lot easier. You could however give your gf a lot less than that, as she doesn't have an education, so her potential salary from working in a shop or on a farm or something would be around 6-8k maximum. Also remember, a Thai guy only makes around 8k a month in the countryside, so your gf wouldn't get much from them, however if you have the ability to pay more, then why not?

[Squigy]

It is all about money and please try not think that it is about anything else. You are the families ATM machine that will hopefully bring , big houses,new cars and many more things that are seen every night on Thai soap.

Think ahead a little, you say you are in the construction industry.. where will you work in Thailand? You cannot. Think about visa's and all the crap that goes with them even if you do get married. You cannot own land in Thailand.

There are many traps along the way and even migrating back to your own country with her will be a problem. It is really not worth all the hassles. IMHO Thai women do not last at being "beautiful".. take a look around the village you are in and then take a look at her mother. Then think again.

You do not speak Thai, she speaks basic English from what I gather.. Communication is the big one in any relationship. Most Thai's family is first,then the farm,then the dog and a lowly last is the farang.!!!!

MO...take it or leave it.

[ludditeman]

As for how much money you give her and her family each month, that'll be upto you. I give my gf a lot (15k per month), because I don't want her to work, so that she has time to look after me, and because I wanted a figure whereby she can save money each month. Then if her family want to borrow money, they can borrow directly from her, rather than from me, which should make repayments a lot easier. You could however give your gf a lot less than that, as she doesn't have an education, so her potential salary from working in a shop or on a farm or something would be around 6-8k maximum. Also remember, a Thai guy only makes around 8k a month in the countryside, so your gf wouldn't get much from them, however if you have the ability to pay more, then why not?

So you are paying a housekeeper 15k (normal price 6k) because she includes sex in her services.

(Food and keep as a bonus?)

Not my definition of a gf, but each to his own.

[rgs2001uk]

Your situation sounds similar to mine

e.g. you're 30, met a 27 year old country girl and got on well with her. Then the parents want you to get married or engaged or something and make a commitment. Only difference is, my girl is 25, whereas I'm 29, she has a bachelor's degree and can speak English (So Sin Sod would go up by a lot), and I actually live close to her village already (prior to meeting her) where I teach English.

When I first started coming over for dinner / lunch pretty much every day, there weren't any problems. However people in the village started to gossip and start asking her mum when we were getting married. Because in conservative Isaan, you don't have a man come to visit a woman at her house for dinner etc unless you're going to get married soon. Likewise we were seen holding hands once or twice in public too, so people were 100% sure that we were getting married soon, because why would you hold hands unless you were getting married soon right?

So to stop the gossip, we elected to get engaged and so I spoke to her mum about the Sin Sod, and what "Down payment" would be made on the Sin Sod when we got engaged. What basically eventuated, was that I could get engaged and pay a low % of the Sin Sod, and appease gossip but not really get much additional freedom compared to when we were just bf/gf. So what I offered, was to pay a much higher % of the Sin Sod instead, and then have more freedom. As callous as it sounds, to think of selling your daughter, it is a bit about that, also having a high Sin Sod paid gains the family a lot of respect in the community. As a result, if you have more freedom with a girl, then she essentially becomes "damaged goods" as far as the community is concerned, and any future wedding would have a significantly lower Sin Sod (if at all), so you need to pay a higher amount to get more freedom.

My gf thought that the Sin Sod which you'd pay in total, would be around 100,000 Baht, give or take a little. Although they will probably also ask you to pay more for "Show", which will then be given back to you, as it will raise the respect within the community for the family. If the family ask for more than that, then they might indeed just see you as a walking ATM, imo get out while you can, as 100k is a lot for an uneducated 27 year old ugly girl (Remember that she's probably never been married because Thai guys don't think she's pretty, with a 3:1 ratio they can afford to be picky, and they don't like girls with dark/tan skin and small noses).

Likewise, the Sin Sod (And any down payment at engagement as well) will usually be given back to you anyway (Well given to your gf/wife anyway, to do with as she pleases. In my case, my gf used it to repay her mother's debts and take out some life insurance policies on her mother).

As for how much money you give her and her family each month, that'll be upto you. I give my gf a lot (15k per month), because I don't want her to work, so that she has time to look after me, and because I wanted a figure whereby she can save money each month. Then if her family want to borrow money, they can borrow directly from her, rather than from me, which should make repayments a lot easier. You could however give your gf a lot less than that, as she doesn't have an education, so her potential salary from working in a shop or on a farm or something would be around 6-8k maximum. Also remember, a Thai guy only makes around 8k a month in the countryside, so your gf wouldn't get much from them, however if you have the ability to pay more, then why not?

This may well be a first for me on TV.

Words fail me.

"My gf thought that the Sin Sod which you'd pay in total, would be around 100,000 Baht, give or take a little"

Is the above for real or is she taking the piss?

As for the rest, as mentioned before words fail me.

[SlyAnimal]

So you are paying a housekeeper 15k (normal price 6k) because she includes sex in her services.

(Food and keep as a bonus?)

Not my definition of a gf, but each to his own.

lol, I pay her to not work (She'd earn quite a bit more if she went back to her old engineering firm), at least until she can setup her own business anyway, otherwise she'd go out and get a job which would annoy the hell out of me for holidays etc.

And yes, 100k is about right I think for an "unspoilt" village girl with no education and no job when marrying a farang. If you guys paid less, perhaps that's because your girls were considered "damaged goods" due to previous relationships etc, or maybe they just thought you were "Farang Kiee Nook" (Birdshit / Farang who is poor same as Thai people) lol, or if you paid a lot more (For an uneducated village girl), then maybe you were just "Kwaiii" (Buffalo / Stupid):-P The amount asked for, for Sin Sod, tells you a lot about what the inlaws think of you.

Edited February 15, 2012 by SlyAnimal

[MeMock]

Why would anyone pay their wife anything?

Are you not supposed to be in 'life' together once you get married?

[rgs2001uk]

So you are paying a housekeeper 15k (normal price 6k) because she includes sex in her services.

(Food and keep as a bonus?)

Not my definition of a gf, but each to his own.

lol, I pay her to not work (She'd earn quite a bit more if she went back to her old engineering firm), at least until she can setup her own business anyway, otherwise she'd go out and get a job which would annoy the hell out of me for holidays etc.

And yes, 100k is about right I think for an "unspoilt" village girl with no education and no job when marrying a farang. If you guys paid less, perhaps that's because your girls were considered "damaged goods" due to previous relationships etc, or maybe they just thought you were "Farang Kiee Nook" (Birdshit / Farang who is poor same as Thai people) lol, or if you paid a lot more (For an uneducated village girl), then maybe you were just "Kwaiii" (Buffalo / Stupid):-P The amount asked for, for Sin Sod, tells you a lot about what the inlaws think of you.

<deleted> this just keeps getting better and better, you couldnt make this crap up.

"And yes, 100k is about right I think for an "unspoilt" village girl with no education and no job when marrying a farang."

Says who?

Just because some overweigh,t overaged losers with more money than says gets turned over by the "its local/thai culture" BS is no concern of mine.

"The amount asked for, for Sin Sod, tells you a lot about what the inlaws think of you."

Probably the only sensible thing you have posted, and serves as an indication that in some cases you are viewed as nothing more than a buffalo that gets led to the ATM on a monthly basis.

Cant even be bothered getting into the, its only for show discussion, that many of these peasants forget to tell the gullible farang.

Just love it when the locals have to curse me under their breath after uttering the infamous, 'farang roo mot", how its sticks in their throats, hope they choke on it.

[CelticBhoy]

^ I'm sure the locals curse a lot in your presence. Nobody likes a know-it-all.

[Semper]

I would revise my prices down, they will be wanting to get rid of her.

[SlyAnimal]

"And yes, 100k is about right I think for an "unspoilt" village girl with no education and no job when marrying a farang."

Says who?

Just because some overweigh,t overaged losers with more money than says gets turned over by the "its local/thai culture" BS is no concern of mine.

"The amount asked for, for Sin Sod, tells you a lot about what the inlaws think of you."

Probably the only sensible thing you have posted, and serves as an indication that in some cases you are viewed as nothing more than a buffalo that gets led to the ATM on a monthly basis.

Cant even be bothered getting into the, its only for show discussion, that many of these peasants forget to tell the gullible farang.

Just love it when the locals have to curse me under their breath after uttering the infamous, 'farang roo mot", how its sticks in their throats, hope they choke on it.

/sigh

You really have a negative view on Thai people and their culture. Sin Sod is a Thai custom, thus since we are living in Thailand, we should embrace (or at least accept) their culture. Payment of 100k isn't much, definitely not a "I'm ripping off this farang big time!!" price. As it's about the same as what a Thai "Hi-So" guy would pay for an "unspoilt but uneducated" Thai girl from a poor family.

If we were in farangland, of course we wouldn't pay Sin Sod, as it'd be in our country not theirs, and they would probably understand that. But you also forget, that Sin Sod is optional anyway, much in the same way that a wedding is optional. You never "need" to get married, however it influences what the family and other people in the village think, which is why you do it (And of course simply because you want to). The village "weddings", aren't legal weddings anyway, they're just for show. If you can throw a party for the village, for show, might as well pay the Sin Sod, for show, as well, as both achieve the same thing.

Anywho, more back on topic.

If you're thinking about pursing things with your girl, go for it imo. Although do think about the following:

If you were to marry her, you'd then either:

1/ Have to bring her to the UK. That'd involve a lot of visas and stuff, she also wouldn't be able to work. Are you able to earn enough to support a wife (and kids in the future). Also not speaking English, she might not be overly fond of living in the UK and being soo far from her family.

2/ You could move to Thailand. You'd then need to work as an English teacher probably, and live in the countryside near/with her family. Are you ready for a change like that?

3/ You could just keep her as a holiday girlfriend, and wait for a year or two until you get married once you're more sure about things. Visit Thailand on your holidays, send her some money to help out now and then. It'd give you some time to think, get to know her and for her to learn some more English, but definitely not an ideal option for the long term.

[klikster]

Why would anyone pay their wife anything?

Are you not supposed to be in 'life' together once you get married?

+1

[rgs2001uk]

^ I'm sure the locals curse a lot in your presence. Nobody likes a know-it-all.

I hardly lose sleep over what the locals think of me, not being Thai I dont need to worry about "face".

I wouldnt consider taking the time to learn how to speak, read and write the language qualifies me as a know it all.

I do have a problem with, walking into a local mom n pop shop where written in Thai are the prices, beer Leo 45 baht per bottle, when I query why I am being charged 70 baht a bottle, the answer, farang price, after declining to buy the overpriced beer I am them cursed to my face.

Didnt bother me in the least, take my custom elsewhere the BIL also thought it a problem, he went into the store and tore a strip off the owner.

I wont take the time to compile a list, however the last one I remember was some poor sap being told by a BG it would cost him 30k for a welcome party when they went to visit her village, yeah right, sounds like a real keeper.

Take a walk into some of the local farang watering holes and listen to the tales of woe, last guy I heard about, the comment was, dam_n near broke him, both mentally and financially.

Personally would rather be thought of as a know it all than a buffalo, but thats just me.

[althemighty]

Just something to watch out for. If an issan girl is an only daughter she will be expected to look after her parents. This does not mean money but physically having to move back to her parents village when they need looking after. So expect within 10 years to have your wife leaving you to return home and look after her parents.

[ludditeman]

Just something to watch out for. If an issan girl is an only daughter she will be expected to look after her parents. This does not mean money but physically having to move back to her parents village when they need looking after. So expect within 10 years to have your wife leaving you to return home and look after her parents.

That could be considered a bonus by some.

In ten years she won't be looking as good and you get to upgrade to a younger model with 'No Fault' on your part, she deserted you!

Edited February 16, 2012 by ludditeman

[rgs2001uk]

You really have a negative view on Thai people and their culture. Sin Sod is a Thai custom, thus since we are living in Thailand, we should embrace (or at least accept) their culture. Payment of 100k isn't much, definitely not a "I'm ripping off this farang big time!!" price. As it's about the same as what a Thai "Hi-So" guy would pay for an "unspoilt but uneducated" Thai girl from a poor family.

Please define, "Thai people and their culture".

Would that be, Northern hilltribe people, Lanna culture, Khmer culture, Issan culture or Southern culture?

Would it be, Chinese, Vietnamese, Indian, or Muslim culture?

I have searched the internet and can find no update on, the Mor Muk incident, or the Honda Civic incident from last year, any info?

Lets not forget, the incident on Suk Rd Bkk, with the kid driving a Benz that ploughed into a busstop (dont think he spent any time in the cells), the HiSo driving a Porsche that cut a Lao girl in half, the nightclub incident in Bkk where someone was shot in a packed nightclub (but there were no witnesses), do you have any info on the outcome of these cases?

I have never heard of,

"a Thai "Hi-So" guy would pay for an "unspoilt but uneducated" Thai girl from a poor family"

I must admit I dont frequent the HiSo social circuit so I may well be out of touch, but please indulge me, how many HiSo guys have you ever heard of who marry an uneducated girl from a poor family?

My wife is Mon, and her culture differs somewhat from what TAT may proclaim to be "Thai Culture", seeing as I live here please let me know which culture I should embrace, my wifes culture or "Thai culture"?

"Sin Sod is a Thai custom"

Really?

Please explain to me why I wasnt asked to pay it?

When I queried it with my prospective MIL the answer was something along the lines of, I dont want to lose face by having the neighbours thinking I am poor.

Please explain to me why the last wedding I attended in Bkk there was no Sin Sot paid?

The last country I lived in I didnt emabrace their culture, please tell me why I should embrace this culture?

Seeing as I am in a cross cultural marriage please tell me how much of my culture the in laws should embrace?

[MAJIC]

name='SlyAnimal' timestamp='1329285482' post='5057465']

Your situation sounds similar to mine

e.g. you're 30, met a 27 year old country girl and got on well with her. Then the parents want you to get married or engaged or something and make a commitment. Only difference is, my girl is 25, whereas I'm 29, she has a bachelor's degree and can speak English (So Sin Sod would go up by a lot), and I actually live close to her village already (prior to meeting her) where I teach English.

When I first started coming over for dinner / lunch pretty much every day, there weren't any problems. However people in the village started to gossip and start asking her mum when we were getting married. Because in conservative Isaan, you don't have a man come to visit a woman at her house for dinner etc unless you're going to get married soon. Likewise we were seen holding hands once or twice in public too, so people were 100% sure that we were getting married soon, because why would you hold hands unless you were getting married soon right?

So to stop the gossip, we elected to get engaged and so I spoke to her mum about the Sin Sod, and what "Down payment" would be made on the Sin Sod when we got engaged. What basically eventuated, was that I could get engaged and pay a low % of the Sin Sod, and appease gossip but not really get much additional freedom compared to when we were just bf/gf. So what I offered, was to pay a much higher % of the Sin Sod instead, and then have more freedom. As callous as it sounds, to think of selling your daughter, it is a bit about that, also having a high Sin Sod paid gains the family a lot of respect in the community. As a result, if you have more freedom with a girl, then she essentially becomes "damaged goods" as far as the community is concerned, and any future wedding would have a significantly lower Sin Sod (if at all), so you need to pay a higher amount to get more freedom.

My gf thought that the Sin Sod which you'd pay in total, would be around 100,000 Baht, give or take a little. Although they will probably also ask you to pay more for "Show", which will then be given back to you, as it will raise the respect within the community for the family. If the family ask for more than that, then they might indeed just see you as a walking ATM, imo get out while you can, as 100k is a lot for an uneducated 27 year old ugly girl (Remember that she's probably never been married because Thai guys don't think she's pretty, with a 3:1 ratio they can afford to be picky, and they don't like girls with dark/tan skin and small noses).

Likewise, the Sin Sod (And any down payment at engagement as well) will usually be given back to you anyway (Well given to your gf/wife anyway, to do with as she pleases. In my case, my gf used it to repay her mother's debts and take out some life insurance policies on her mother).

As for how much money you give her and her family each month, that'll be upto you. I give my gf a lot (15k per month), because I don't want her to work, so that she has time to look after me, and because I wanted a figure whereby she can save money each month. Then if her family want to borrow money, they can borrow directly from her, rather than from me, which should make repayments a lot easier. You could however give your gf a lot less than that, as she doesn't have an education, so her potential salary from working in a shop or on a farm or something would be around 6-8k maximum. Also remember, a Thai guy only makes around 8k a month in the countryside, so your gf wouldn't get much from them, however if you have the ability to pay more, then why not?

You are correct "100,000" baht is a lot for an uneducated village girl of 25, the last Thai Village marriage I went to: the Girl was 18 and the thai man 23,and all that was on the floor for the Sin Sod,was 20,000 baht. Think Thai Sin Sod,if you are going to pay any at all?

[elliss]

starter for ten ,

how do you know she was never a bar girl , or anything like that ,btw

there are many ATM,s in udon enjoying relationships with ex bar ladies

who they have previously met , in the southern sex pots, good luck to them .

in fact nong han/udon , is the epicentre for thai/farang relationships , via the internet, etc.

the thai lady at 27 is likely to have a thai bf , or hubby in the shadows , or maybe he,s working away,

not important , thai culture .

in summary what is expected of you ?

from a thai perspective , MONEY.

best of luck

[ALFREDO]

Why mostly so negative? No understand your attitude!

To the OP, take your loved one to a Holyday, away from the village, at a beach resort and check her out, in every detail!

Than think again, how you can and if you want have a future with her.

You should not buy the cat in the bag unseen, untested!

Sin Sod, marry party Thai-Buddhiststyle, ect. comes all later. You should be the Boss.

rgs2001uk

I think the Thais love you and your attitude.

Edited February 16, 2012 by ALFREDO

[SlyAnimal]

lol Rgs she probably didn't ask you for sin sod because she knew you wouldn't pay it

Same as my gf's aunt from bkk, tried to advise my gf's mum to not ask me incase it scared me off because she knows not all farang agree with it. However I had no problems with it, and was actually quite interested in seeing what she was ask for so I could gauge her potential greed for in future years. As it turned out, she asked for the same amount as what 3-4 of my good Thai friends said she probably would

As for the 23 year old Thai guy who paid 20k, they also take into account your financial means when they ask. At 23 he wouldn't have had much financial ability. A farang paying 20k would lose face with the village, as it'd show that they only have the same amount of money as a 23yr old rice farmer, better to not pay at all and leave them guessing.

And yes in Bkk it's more western so sin sod won't always happen, likewise if you have an expensive "hi-so" wedding they don't need to show it as much since the wedding shows your financial means anyway (also sin sod is a custom more for the uneducated villagers rather than the more educated and well travelled Thais, sorta one of those things you do to make your mother/grandmother in law happy/proud because its more their friends who will really care about it). It's never a compulsory anyway, if they really want it but a Thai guy can't afford it, the father in law will just put it up himself anyway (had that happen to a Thai guy I know, his FIL paid his 100k sin sod)

[chuckd]

I have been to three weddings in Isaan during the past year. All of them were Thai/Thai and all of them paid sin sod. The highest being 300,000 baht cash and five baht gold.

Sin sod is real.

[puchooay]

This sort of thread does make me laugh. All these people talking about "Thai wife this" and "Thai wife that"

Sure things go wrong for some people and some Thai families see money when they see Farang.

But....for every one person I have heard say "my Thai wife only wanted my money" or "my Thai wife ripped me off" I must have heard more than ten guys say something like "My English wife was a right bitch. Only ever thought about money" or " Divorcing my American wife nearly broke me".

Food for thought.

[ludditeman]

But....for every one person I have heard say "my Thai wife only wanted my money" or "my Thai wife ripped me off" I must have heard more than ten guys say something like "My English wife was a right bitch. Only ever thought about money" or " Divorcing my American wife nearly broke me".

Yep, it's the 'wife' concept that is faulty, not the nationality of the wife.

Marriage should be outlawed, and any guy crazy enough to contemplate it 'sectioned' for his own financial well-being.

[cardholder]

But....for every one person I have heard say "my Thai wife only wanted my money" or "my Thai wife ripped me off" I must have heard more than ten guys say something like "My English wife was a right bitch. Only ever thought about money" or " Divorcing my American wife nearly broke me".

Yep, it's the 'wife' concept that is faulty, not the nationality of the wife.

Marriage should be outlawed, and any guy crazy enough to contemplate it 'sectioned' for his own financial well-being.

You reind me of an old friend in the UK who said "Men should live with men (because they understand each other) and go out to seek women for sex".

He had a point .........

[isanbirder]

But....for every one person I have heard say "my Thai wife only wanted my money" or "my Thai wife ripped me off" I must have heard more than ten guys say something like "My English wife was a right bitch. Only ever thought about money" or " Divorcing my American wife nearly broke me".

Yep, it's the 'wife' concept that is faulty, not the nationality of the wife.

Marriage should be outlawed, and any guy crazy enough to contemplate it 'sectioned' for his own financial well-being.

You reind me of an old friend in the UK who said "Men should live with men (because they understand each other) and go out to seek women for sex".

He had a point .........

Cardholder, you're halfway to being one of us!

But seriously though, I've rarely read so much nonsense even on TV. In Isan, as everywhere else, there are nice people and nasty ones, and it's up to you to find out the difference. Granted, when a supposedly wealthy farang comes here, he tends to attract those who are only after his money; do you mean to tell me this doesn't happen in other countries too?

I hate all this talk about 'Thai this' and 'Thai that'. Thais are human beings, though you might not think so for the way some of you write; each has to be treated (and assessed, if you like) as a human being, not as a representative of a group.

Rant over. I have a Thai partner, and we get on fine. His parents are old dears, and never ask me for anything. They actually want us to make it official by means of a 'civil partnership' (which means a trip to Vietnam).

[cardholder]

But....for every one person I have heard say "my Thai wife only wanted my money" or "my Thai wife ripped me off" I must have heard more than ten guys say something like "My English wife was a right bitch. Only ever thought about money" or " Divorcing my American wife nearly broke me".

Yep, it's the 'wife' concept that is faulty, not the nationality of the wife.

Marriage should be outlawed, and any guy crazy enough to contemplate it 'sectioned' for his own financial well-being.

You reind me of an old friend in the UK who said "Men should live with men (because they understand each other) and go out to seek women for sex".

He had a point .........

Cardholder, you're halfway to being one of us!

IB - there was one subtle difference in mystatement, I think

[isanbirder]

Cardholder, you're halfway to being one of us!

IB - there was one subtle difference in mystatement, I think

Touche, CH!

But you did say "He had a point....".

Edited February 17, 2012 by isanbirder

[elliss]

try her out in every little detail.

especially onto the bed .

try before you buy ,

your giving us farangs , a good name , keep it up

sin sod ,uuuhh ,, thats for silly sods.

[Huayrat]

by the way, whats the average dowry and what is considered reasonable as support?

Hi Ajay, you dont have to pay a dowry at all so forget that nonsense its upto you what you give or not give... Id say 5000 baht is enough per month to help her parents but not a big lump sum dowry like ppl are saying