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Humours Sms And Jokes

Road_Runner
Road_Runner
in Jokes - Puzzles and Riddles - Make My Day!

Featured Replies

Humours SMS And Jokes



Will try and add as frequently as possible.

Nine angels came to me and asked, "Do you know the most intelligent, smart, nice, noble, well-behaved, and best groomed person?"



I gave them your address

>

>>

>>>

>>>>

>>>>>

>>>>>>

>>>>>>>

>>>>>>>>

>>>>>>>>>

Wow! What a fool i made out of them. :o

  • Author

What do I do when I see someone



Cute

Terrific

Fabulous

Gorgeous

Attractive?

I Stare And Smile

And When I Get Tired

I Put Down The Mirror !!!

  • Author

Sincere Apologies



If U Don't Like Any Of My SMS

And Don't Like 2 Read Them

Please Don't Hesitate

Feel Free To

Throw Your Mobile Away.

  • Author

If You Save This Message It Means I'm Cute



If You Edit This Message I'm Still Cute

If You Forward This Message You Are Spreading That I'm Cute

If You Erase This Message You Are Jealous Of Me 'Coz I'm Cute

  • Author

May Your Life Be Full Of Honey



May Your Husband Be Fat & Funny

May Your Life Always Be Full Of Roses

May Your Children Have Very Big Noses

:o

It's national mental health week and all you have to do to help raise money is text this to your local retard...Well that's my bit done!

:D

Road_Runner this is not directed at you mate.

:o

  • Author

Just go to hel_l



U

U

U

because only U

can change hel_l into heaven by your sweetness.

Chopper not directed at you either mate



:o

Friends??

  • Author

Did U Know A Simple Hello Can Be So Sweet



H = How Are U

E = Everything Ok With U

L = Like To See U

L = Love To Hear From U

O = Obviously Miss U

:o

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author

WELCOME TO



www. sexy.com

Type Password

s

e

x

y

NEW MEMBER:

Name - sexy

PROCESSING...

DENIED !!

2 OLD 2 B SEXY

TRY

www. oldie.com

  • Author

Last Night I Woke Up Hugging The Pillow



Because I Was Dreaming Of You

Tonight I Will Try Dreaming Of My Pillow

So That I Can Wake Up Hugging You

:o

  • Author

Sex is like a restaurant



Sometimes you get good service

Sometimes bad service

Sometimes no service

And many times you got to be happy with 'Self Service'

" :o:D:D:D"

Edited by Road_Runner

  • Author

Husband's Penis Was Stung By A Bee



Wife Prayed!

Dear Lord!!

Please Reduce The Pain

But Let The Swelling Remain Forever

Amen!

  • Author

A Special Breakfast For You Today



A

Fork Of Care

Plate Of Love

Bowl Of Peace

Spoon Of Hope

Glass Of Prayer

Enjoy Your Breakfast

You Are Under God's Care

  • Author

Its The Sweetest Thing To Do



Do It On The Bed

Do It On The Sofa

Do It In The Bathroom

Do It Anywhere You Like

But Never-Ever Stop Doing It

May God Bless Your Naughty Mind

I Was Just Talking About Your Daily Prayer

  • Author

I Think I Should Tell You What People Are Saying Behind Your Back



NICE ASS !!!!!!

" :o "

  • Author

Why Does A Man Fall In Love?



Lack Of Experience !

Why Does He Break Off Love?

Lack Of Patience !!

Then Why Does He Want To Fall In Love Again?

Lack Of Memory !!!

  • Author

7 Days make a week



A week of sex makes one WEAK

No sex in a week makes 1 SICK

Sex once a week makes 1 SEEK

So

R U WEAK, SICK, or out to SEEK?

  • Author

Marriage Advantages:



Marriage means that someone helps you

Cope up with all the problems

You never had when your were single.

:o

  • Author

Latest Invention



The Japanese Have Produced A New Camera

It Has An Amazing Shutter Speed

It Can Take A Pic Of A Woman

With Her Mouth Shut!!

:o

  • Author

When U R Stressed & About To Breakdown



Just Remember STRESSED Is Just DESSERTS

Spelled Backwards

Enjoy Your Piece Of Cake

:o

  • Author

First Battle



Whenever you are depressed and think that you've lost

Remember you are the same sperm that once won the battle

To survive among millions of your kind.

:o

  • Author

wxy xyw ywx yxw xwy wyx



ywx xyw xwy yxw xyw

wxy yxw ywx xwy

yxw wyx xwy

xwy ywx

wxy

Did you get it?

Look closely.

Okay, turn it upside down

Now, you got it?

You still don't get it right?

What did you expect?

If you can't get it straight what you think?

You would get it when its upside down?

Gotcha!!!!

  • Author

Teacher: "There has been a complaint that you have been using a lot of abusing languages and unnecessary force."



Student, "What the f***, i have never done that, which motherf***, son ** * ****h, said that, just let me know his name and i will kick his ass right until Mars."

  • Author

What's the similarity between a mother and a wife?



One woman brings us into the world crying

The other ensures you continue to do so!!

:o

  • Author

"LISTEN' & 'SILENT' have the same letters



Do you know why?

Because you can listen to your friends

Even when they are silent.

  • 3 weeks later...
  • Author

Life is like a MOVIE



If you are sad - DRAMA

If you are angry - ACTION

If you are afraid - SUSPENSE

You look at the mirror - HORROR

Now you are smiling - That's COMEDY

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