meemiathai Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 What about Thai men with low sex-drives? Erectile dysfunction? The ones who don't get off on sex with someone they don't trust? I'm sorry but I can't believe that every Thai man is a seething mass of hormones waiting to do the business with any woman who just happens to be passing by You forgot also to mention the katoeys. It is actually very clear that no one here is saying that EVERY man or THAI man will stray. So no need to be defensive. By the way, I never knew that sex has anything to do with trust. Especially from a man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kerryk Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 (edited) Are you guys really so gullible? BKKgoddess is obviously male and Mark45 a troll. I wouldn't be surprised if they were the same person and their internet name started with The.......... I agree with OC that something just doesn't sit right with these 2 "characters" I went back and looked at your posts. If I didn’t lose count you have called people trolls about 7 times in the past couple of months. I would think that is much higher than the average poster. Why I wonder would you concentrate on theories of why people post instead of dealing with the information in the post. Why would you not agree or disagree with the information? If I said the sky is black and you went out and found it to be white would you question my motives for saying the sky is black or would you say I was wrong and the sky is white. Actually there are a number of alternative responses. A. About your sky is black post, I think you are man and there for could not tell if the sky is white or black so get off of this forum. B. Your emotions are too involved in your ability to perceive whether the sky is white or black. C. I think you are in cahoots with another person on this forum who also thinks the sky is black you must be involved in a conspiracy. D. Obviously a troll, who would want to discuss the sky being black or white anyway. E. The sky being white or black is a moral and cultural issue and my religion and culture gives me the answer and you are wrong. My point is, it seems obvious that one should go out and see if the sky is white or black at least that would be my first choice. Why all the attacking of the messenger instead of dealing with the message? I just don’t get it. Edited April 17, 2006 by kerryk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meemiathai Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 i am not a monogomous person although dont play around as in , not promiscuous, i've usually had two main partners (have always been in love with two people at once ever since i started dating at 16 .... its not the sex, its the being in love, (even , yes, when married, had a partner for 7 years!).... my thai partner is super monogomous and i intend to be this time round... (older, wiser, whatever)... i think that there just isnt a one perfect person so maybe i should belong to the clan of women in tibet? or wherever that practices bigamy among the women (one woman two husbands).... i've never ever done one nighters, partners just for sex, etc.... i was also a mia noi for two years and it never bothered me... (the wife knew about me -sent me a present -- but she's in thailand and i am here... so she was satisfied that i was taking care of her husband but not taking her money or family... as he returns to her); now he is not here having had a visa move, and i have a steady single boyfriend, so she assumes he will go to the 'working women' in tel aviv, something she would rather not have him do.... life is never simple or straight forward and i never judge anybody (pot calling the kettle black etc)... men and women are just that, people, defined by their personalities, cultural values, and circumstances at the moment.... WOW I think it's what they call a life spoiler...whatever you'll ever tell me, you're as filthy as it gets, why the hel_l did you even got married than? Grow up man! And say something instead of behaving like a God! Thanks Bina for the post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meemiathai Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 Life is a troll itself. So, maybe it's not too wrong to say that everything is a troll. Who cares, I love to listen to stories. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kerryk Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 i am not a monogomous person although dont play around as in , not promiscuous, i've usually had two main partners (have always been in love with two people at once ever since i started dating at 16 .... its not the sex, its the being in love, (even , yes, when married, had a partner for 7 years!).... my thai partner is super monogomous and i intend to be this time round... (older, wiser, whatever)... i think that there just isnt a one perfect person so maybe i should belong to the clan of women in tibet? or wherever that practices bigamy among the women (one woman two husbands).... i've never ever done one nighters, partners just for sex, etc.... i was also a mia noi for two years and it never bothered me... (the wife knew about me -sent me a present -- but she's in thailand and i am here... so she was satisfied that i was taking care of her husband but not taking her money or family... as he returns to her); now he is not here having had a visa move, and i have a steady single boyfriend, so she assumes he will go to the 'working women' in tel aviv, something she would rather not have him do.... life is never simple or straight forward and i never judge anybody (pot calling the kettle black etc)... men and women are just that, people, defined by their personalities, cultural values, and circumstances at the moment.... WOW I think it's what they call a life spoiler...whatever you'll ever tell me, you're as filthy as it gets, why the hel_l did you even got married than? I think that is a little over the top. There are many ways of disagreeing with a person without name calling. I have been involved in a couple of poly amorous relationships. They are difficult at best. Some people can get their head around it most can’t. Not everyone was raised in a Christian puritan or Buddhist environment. There are a lot of other cultures that incorporate multiple partner marriages and or relationships. When my Thai partner asks me what I want to be reincarnated as I tell her a Bedouin Prince. They don’t have to work for a living, have as many wives as they want and vacation in Thailand. Then she laughs and says Buddha will never allow it and I will come back as a frog for saying such things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 Agreed kerryk, name calling or bringing other peoples morals and ethics into question is uncalled for. Abuse and flaming of other members is against forum rules. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sylvafern Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 This topic is better than TV - can't check in each evening so see what's been added! I think all the differing opinions here just point to the fact that EVERY relationship is different! For some people cheating is okay, for others open relationships are fine (which is what bina's seemed to be if the wife was sending her presents - if it's all open I can't see what's bad about it if all parties are in agreement) and then there are monogomous relationships which DO exist - and DO exist between Thai men and farang women. I don't think it's fair to put people down or criticise them for the type of relationship they have even if it's different to your own ideas of what a relationship is. Also, I don't think it's fair to assume that all/most/90% relationships are the same as what you've experienced or have observed. Back to the original question .... in 6 years of being together with my Thai b/f he's never turned off his phone or disappeared. Yes, we've hung up on each other in anger a number of times (goes both ways) and maybe even ignored a call until calm, but never for a prolonged period - so yes, I agree with sbk that there is something fishy in disappearing, even if it's just not wanting to confront an issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bina Posted April 17, 2006 Share Posted April 17, 2006 ive known several beduins with more than one wife and they say it is a head ache!! not answering phones does seem to be a thai man trend more than other cultures (americans want to discuss everything it seems: anger issues bla bla... israelis just cut straight in to the problem, thais seem to close the phone, mull awhile and then call back w/messages of love etc.... ) from my own very personal experiences.... all the rest is speculation of coarse (sp.?).... the problem with long distance relationships is the frustration of bad language skills over the phone: that is language communication problems that cause the misunderstandings, the frustration of not being able to see the facial expressions (for me very important is the eye contact etc)., body language... sometimes to calm someone down by placing a hand on an arm is very effective but not over the phone, thereby having tempers build up and then the yelling starts... also, out of sight causes jeaolousy and the imaginations can run wild etcetc... oops. forgot where i was going with this (after 12 hour day of tourists ugh!) so all languages going to h###.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seonai Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 Not itchy LaoPo, just a little bored and hoping for some good stories here Trolls - well not sure if this is exactly the same thing but I know for a fact that some posters deliberately exagerate the truth just to cause a fuss. GirlX - never meant to be offensive to you honest, sometimes I vent a little as I am mainly alone here I should stop reading this kind of post! It is no good for me. I am the kind of person who believes in monogomy and if anyone ever cheated on me I would leave and move on. I wouldn't be able to live with it. There, baring my sole By the way, where is BKKGodess? Hope it all went well etc.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girlx Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 it's ok seonai, i hate to be cheated on too- and i don't mean to be so negative, sort of working it out for myself as i go along too. but i have learned in my time that it (cheating) doesn't really mean anything to the guy in most cases beyond a reflexive need. i still wouldn't be able to go back to him once i knew he strayed, especially if he lied about it, but i would at least maybe be able to understand the situation more by being realistic. and, from now on i might approach relationships from a more open point of view. the way the thais do it, ie. marrying for convenience, stability and companionship and then keeping the mistress on the side, really seems ideal to me given human nature! but the problem in thailand is that the men can do as they please and the women can not! of course in an ideal relationship you would never lose the attraction to your partner and would never look at or be tempted by anyone else. but i don't believe that is possible.... who knows, people are confusing. i still have a lot to learn too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seonai Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 Know what you mean GirlX, life is weird! For me my son is the most important. Also I am quite lucky in that we live in a vert tight knit community so everyone knows what everyone else is up to! My hubby would never cheat unless he was relly unhappy with me and if that ever happened...... we would both know in advance. Sorry to post personal stuff on someone else's thread. Just wanted to be clear Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ColPyat Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 but the problem in thailand is that the men can do as they please and the women can not! Wouldn't that be nice! Unfortunately though reality is not exactly as if we men could do as we please here, and being caught straying does rather often result in rather worse consequences than painfully strenous and tearful indepth discussions. Hence the renowned expertise of Thai surgeons in reattaching sensitive male parts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kat Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 ... I have been attacked with ... cement lawn statues, dishes, a stereo receiver, a paint ball gun and a bulldozer. I have had my nose broken and a tooth broken by a flying bottle of mouthwash. ... at this point, who cares if Mark45 is a troll? He's certainly full of good stories. Every time I read the above sentence I am filled with hysterical laughter. I'm just gonna sit back and enjoy this thread. No need in repeating everything that gets rehashed every three weeks anyway. I have really slow internet these days, so I'll just ditto everything Meemia has already said. By the way, I'd love to meet Mark45y for a beer also. I'm in BKK. I also will second and third that for Girlx, meemia, Seonai, SBK, Donna - hel_l, why don't we all meet for a beer at Seonai's in a couple of months? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ColPyat Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 at this point, who cares if Mark45 is a troll? He's certainly full of good stories. Every time I read the above sentence I am filled with hysterical laughter. ditto! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 Oh no, no, this has to be the best one: found a gay mama san at the Voodoo club in Nana plaza and asked him for help. He was really a nice guy if one could get over his pink iridescent tuxedos with the orchids in the lapel. It all seems so familiar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donna Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 why the hel_l not meet for that beer kat. i will be living in phuket by that time, all going well, but can certainly pop over for the night! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meemiathai Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 By the way, I'd love to meet Mark45y for a beer also. I'm in BKK. I also will second and third that for Girlx, meemia, Seonai, SBK, Donna - hel_l, why don't we all meet for a beer at Seonai's in a couple of months? I would love to meet you people. Learn some culture and learn to speak english better. The only thing is, I live in HK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seonai Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 Go girls, let's do it!!!!!!!!! Come to my bar and we will "shoot the crap"..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seonai Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 guys too sorry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ourmanflint Posted April 18, 2006 Share Posted April 18, 2006 wow! I was just about to post about "how tenacious you girls are when you get your teeth into a subject".... when here you all are organising a good ole piss up!! Go Team!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patsycat Posted April 19, 2006 Share Posted April 19, 2006 I have a tendency not to date shy or quiet women. I usually end up with the lady who is the life of the party. Aggressive, outgoing women for the most part. I have broken up with a number of women of all different nationalities. I have had a metal garbage can thrown three stories onto the roof of my new car. I have had all my clothes shredded. I have had all my clothes sold at a garage sale. I have had all of my possessions boxed up and dumped at the busiest intersection of Denver Colorado in the middle of the street (that was a fun one). I have had two bank accounts completely drained. I have been attacked with knives, cement lawn statues, dishes, a stereo receiver, a paint ball gun and a bulldozer. I have had my nose broken and a tooth broken by a flying bottle of mouthwash. Adding my own experience to what I read on TV and other Thai oriented forums although I have never disappeared I can understand it. I think Thai women may be more inclined to rash acts than Western women. That might lead to disappearing as being the preferred way to end a relationship. Although in my experience Western women are equally as rash. Sorry, haven't all read the thread, but I have one question - Do y ou want simpathy or laughter? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patsycat Posted April 19, 2006 Share Posted April 19, 2006 Sorry to move into you blah, But i will be in Samui 21 - 7 march if anyone is around.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mark45y Posted April 19, 2006 Share Posted April 19, 2006 I have a tendency not to date shy or quiet women. I usually end up with the lady who is the life of the party. Aggressive, outgoing women for the most part. I have broken up with a number of women of all different nationalities. I have had a metal garbage can thrown three stories onto the roof of my new car. I have had all my clothes shredded. I have had all my clothes sold at a garage sale. I have had all of my possessions boxed up and dumped at the busiest intersection of Denver Colorado in the middle of the street (that was a fun one). I have had two bank accounts completely drained. I have been attacked with knives, cement lawn statues, dishes, a stereo receiver, a paint ball gun and a bulldozer. I have had my nose broken and a tooth broken by a flying bottle of mouthwash. Adding my own experience to what I read on TV and other Thai oriented forums although I have never disappeared I can understand it. I think Thai women may be more inclined to rash acts than Western women. That might lead to disappearing as being the preferred way to end a relationship. Although in my experience Western women are equally as rash. Sorry, haven't all read the thread, but I have one question - Do y ou want simpathy or laughter? Laughter for sure. At the time I did not think it very funny but upon later reflection found most of the experiences humorous. The Denver story is the most interesting and includes as players an ex presidential candidate, a federal prosecutor, the French consulate and guest appearances by Robert Redford and Wayne Wong in a Bentley with a mink robe and three inebriated nauseous playboy bunnies. If we ever meet for a drink I would be more than happy to relate the adventure but since most of the people involved are still alive I am hesitant to put it in print Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girlx Posted April 19, 2006 Share Posted April 19, 2006 i will be in Samui 21 - 7 march if anyone is around.. did you mean may by chance? i could be there too, if others want to meet up... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaiPauly Posted April 19, 2006 Share Posted April 19, 2006 Forget about the present phone situation. If he knew for three months that you were going to be here wouldn't he have set up definite arrangements to meet you somewhere at sometime prior to your arrival???? How did that happen (or not happen)? Tippaporn is spot on. In reality, your guy should have been at the airport to pick you up and take you to the hotel. My GF and I are not often apart, but about once every 6 months she has to go to Chiang Mai or Phuket on behalf of her company. I always go to the airport to pick her up- even if she has only been gone overnight. In fact she would either be dissapointed or pissed at me if I wasn't there! What a nice person you are Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LuvinMyThai Posted April 19, 2006 Share Posted April 19, 2006 sbk i repeat he doesnt know exactly where i am, but he does have my number since i last called him. as for the long distance thing, we both discussed it and agreed to it and it wasnt for long. he know for sure i was coming back as every time i called him i was explaining that i had moved out, or quit my job, or bought tickets. he's known for three months i was coming back to give this relationship a chance. and no i dont have high expectations, but he asked me to be faithful while i was away and i was, i think its reasonable to expect the same from him but if you're right and he didnt think i would come back and has been with someone else because of that then i'm willing to ovewrlook it if he'd just sort his shit out and get i touch. anywa, being happily married to a thai man i thought you'd have something more positive to say. can't anyone give me a glimmer fo hope, or is there seriously none to find? I will be seriously devastated if what you guys are suggesting is true, i'm really in love with him. Okay...so as many people on here know....I don't know much about Thai men.... HOWEVER.....I really hate to burst your bubble of hope....but I believe that if ANY guy across any borders....is not trying to get a hold of you....and has turned off his mobile phone....and he knows that you just came in to see him.....I'd say, he's not man enough to tell you to your face, or even over the mobile...that he's..."Just not THAT into you".. If a guy truly cares and loves you, nothing would keep him from finding you, getting in touch with you, and he certainly wouldn't turn off his mobile and avoid your calls, as it appears he has done. There is a difference between "love"..and "lust". It doesn't sound like you two spent enough time together to be in "love"...am I right or wrong? I think that you need to demand more respect of your feelings....and if it's been 5+ days and he still hasn't gotten a hold of you....if he DOES get a hold of you....I would tell him to take his "out of service" mobile phone and stick it where the sun don't shine. But hey....that's just me. If he was really into you, you wouldn't be sitting on here asking everyone else if he's into you or not. Stop making excuses for him....pull your pride up....make a stand for yourself...and move on. You teach people how to treat you....and if you are thinking of giving him another chance....I can almost guarantee you...this will happen again. I'm not trying to be harsh or unkind to your feelings....but you have got to expect more for yourself then this. Actions speak louder then words.....what are his actions telling you??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donna Posted April 20, 2006 Share Posted April 20, 2006 here here! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dude Posted April 20, 2006 Share Posted April 20, 2006 Lovin' Mai Tais makes some good points. Take heed. Dig? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soph Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Good points made - I know the kind of situation and its a silly state to be in, although not always one that is apparant until some time after you have ditched the loser Anyway BKKgoddess have you made any decisions or taken heed of any advise posted here yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaoPo Posted April 22, 2006 Share Posted April 22, 2006 Anyway BKKgoddess have you made any decisions or taken heed of any advise posted here yet? BKKgoddess was "Last Active 2006-04-16 21:47:59". LaoPo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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