Coming with a friend

[kinmaew]

I had quite the opposite experience with the TGF at the time. When I met her she mentioned that this Tom was infatuated with her and would not leave her alone. I never met this person but it came to a boiling point where the police were involved and finally this person left her alone.

[Gecko123]

I have had a very similar experience with a sales girl from Big C.

Her friend wasn't a lesbian, but basically all they were after was free food and entertainment.

Some sales staff in big box retailers routinely go out with customers and likely sleep with those they are attracted to in order to supplement their income. Basically, casual prostitution.

I'll bet you if you say the second girl has to pay her own way, or start taking them on "nature walk" dates which don't involve spending lots of baht, they'll be gone like the wind.

[jamestip2013]

Sorry . You have a "hanger on".... Nobody wants a date that cost 150% more each time . You are being used.. There is nothing worse than having a date with a"hanger on" or a "user". Tell her straight you are NOT taking 2 out only one .. If she doesn't agree and stop bringing her friend just say "bye bye" and keep walking .. Tell her to ring you when SHE wants to see you . Don't believe all the garbage on posts on this site which say Thai girls need a chaperon.. Thais are the amongst the most unfaithful in the world. A high percent have "Gigs" (fxxk buddies) to many men, multiple boy friends or vice versa girlfriends.

In fact I dated girl and met her at a resturant ... walked in and seen she had her a friends with her AND SAID "HI" AND KEPT WALKING..Its the only way. The most common story you hear about this is 2 girls or more together will top shelf you and it will cost you a fortune..The only way to find out about her is to be alone.... MOVE ON as she has already used you ...Next time never take her "friend".. Be firm. If she thinks you are an ass she is no good.

[dror]

someone asked why do i know that girl is a tomboy well it is because she is dressed like a man looks like a man tries to talk like a man have a short hair and makes it look like a thai man hair so i think thats enough.

update for now we had to meet today with her tomboy friend, she just called to cancel and said she wont make it for today and that i can stop by her work place tomorrow evening and eat there only me and her.

really dont know what to think

[Baa_Mango]

man you got to warm them both up. Try a vodka party

[Gecko123]

someone asked why do i know that girl is a tomboy well it is because she is dressed like a man looks like a man tries to talk like a man have a short hair and makes it look like a thai man hair so i think thats enough.

update for now we had to meet today with her tomboy friend, she just called to cancel and said she wont make it for today and that i can stop by her work place tomorrow evening and eat there only me and her.

really dont know what to think

If you were a woman and a guy you were dating wanted to invite his openly gay friend along on a date, what would you think?

Duh!

[micmichd]

Guess in chapter 2 you mean your gf when you write "her".

Assuming this, I'd say you're not a sensation to show around anymore.

And now your gf wants to be alone with you.

[ToddinChonburi]

OK first how old are you and how old is this girl ? You meet her at a club and she like to drink ?

My definition of a date is, Dinner , movie, ice cream , walk in the park, and yes if you need a friend as chaperone.

Motorbike ride to the zoo then lunch.

Lunch or dinner at the mall.

Trip to the night market for dinner and a smoothie.

Any of these ideas help you out in any way just say OH YA !!!!!

If she does not like any of these ideas you know she is using you.

[Sleekjub]

1) She's not comfortable being with you yet, so she brings her friend.

2) She's either bi or diiz.

Make friend with a gay and bring him along on your next date.

[Moonlover]

Dror. Only you have meet this lady and her 'tomboy'', whatever you mean by that. Only you can judge whether a genuine relationship is developing or not. Only you can sense whether you are being taken for a ride.

My wife had a chaperone/friend with her for our first few dates and she was 51 years old at the time we met. there is nothing unusual in this.

Follow your own instincts and 'gut feelings'. They are much more reliable than the advice you'll get from a bunch of caustic, albeit well-meaning, bar stool counsellors.

Good luck pal.

[csabo]

Maybe she wants three in a bed.

Do you know what toms do in bed??

[longstebe]

Maybe she wants three in a bed.

Do you know what toms do in bed??

Dunno but I'd like the chance to find out.

Can't see what the problem is here tbh.

[Sleekjub]

Maybe op can turn tom back to straight. Kill two birds with one stone.

[WhamBam]

It is not uncommon for a thai lady to have a chaperone

Yeah right! A tomboy chaperone! Pull the other one.

One lady I met brought along a Tom as her chaperone for several dates. Turns out the Tom was a cousin and spoke better English.

I was with that woman for over 2 years and rarely saw the Tom again except at family gatherings of one sort or another.

All is not as we expect it to be in Thailand.

And she is not the only one who wanted a chaperone until she felt comfortable about being with me on her own.

If they had been bar girls, I'd not have expected a chaperone.

[Muzarella]

You didn't say what kind of restaurants are you taking them......Next time take them to a cheap restaurant, the ones with a 30 to 40 THB meals and no beer or whiskey.. If they complaint about..or do not want to meet you again....you will know that they are meeting with you not because your charm or conversation. And..after more than 2 dates with a chaperone, it is time for you to ask her to come alone. If not, she may wants for you to be a friend paying the entertainment bill, not a lover.

[ggt]

It is not uncommon for Thai women to have a Tomboy lover...and a foreign banker...

[marko kok prong]

Had an approach like this in Kanchanaburi,sitting alone at a resturant,i was asked by the girl,and her tomboy to join them,"maybe you can buy us some drink" she joked,

"maybe not" i replied,her face soured and they ignored me.

[winstonc]

Maybe she wants three in a bed.

yeah three in the bed and the tomboy said bend over bend over........over to you costas...

[Travelman868]

brit doggie so how did you solve that problem with the girl that happened to you?

also to those that say she is using me then why didnt she come with her on the first time that we met?

I don't think it is unusual for a friend to join date. Did the girl say friend was Tom ?? If she did then it may indicate that

she swings both ways.

Stop being picky and enjoy (both)

[Monkeyrobot]

She is bringing the Tom for the free feed and maybe also a bit of back up for translation.

[LuckyLew]

Your new friend prefers plastic wee wee to your equipment

Time for you to find another ...

Try finding one who is not a lesbian, you might end up happier

[davethailand]

She is a Lesbian.

Go away from her.

They are both taking advantage of you.

Listen to Costas and you won't regret it.

Agreed get rid.

My step daughter went through the Tomboy friend stage years back when she was about 17 and it ended up with two dodgy incidents.

One where she was stupid enough to get a bus to Bangkok to meet her (to get a phone or something back after telling her that they aren't friends any more) and she was met at Ekamai by 3 toms who were all nice and friendly until in the taxi where they started hitting her (the driver stopped the car and got her out and away from them) and the second time after living with a "friend" and her family helping them in their shop where she came home and asked me if she could move back in (I said of course).

A couple of nights later they got her outside my old bar and started roughing her up. Luckily my Thai Manager sorted it out.

So its fair to say I have no time for Toms and thankfully she has got herself a very nice boyfriend now.

Edited March 3, 2015 by davethailand

[dror]

ok so few clarification and updates.

to those who asked im 25 years old and she is 28 years old.

some of you guys here are talking like i already bought her a house for 3 milion baht.

i may be young but im not that stupid and luckily i dont have that kind of money anyway even if i wanted to.

we had gone on a date only 2 times.

one was when i went to her place of work in lotus we ate kfc bought 1 meal for me and her for like 200 baht she didnt complain or said anything, on that time she came alone not with that tomboy.

second time was when she came with the tomboy and we went to the night club, we drank a few beers, been there like 2 hours and i went back home.

today was supposed to be the third time when she wanted to come with the tomboy as well.

after that she canceled and said she will not be able to make it. she then suggested that tomorrow i will come to the place where she works in the evening and we will eat just me and her i said yes ok.

after that i thought to myself little bit and i know it may be stupid and a big mistake but i texted her that im sorry but i dont think i will be able to make it as she works about 20 minutes drive from the centre and taking again taxi over there is rather expensive for me (about 350 baht go and come back and there are no taxis there).

she said it is ok and that she will come to me tomorrow and we can go eat bbq around my place of residence and that she apologizes.

i then stright forward attacked her and asked if she is sure that tomboy is not her bf/gf and that it seems like that as they are working together and spend time together she then sent me a photo with the tomboy gf and asked why dont i trust her.

i said im sorry but its hard to believe here in thailand and she has to understand.

i then told her that if she think that im a stupid farang and she can get money from me for her and for her tomboy she was wrong and that the minute i would be feeling its crossing my red line ill disappear in a jiffy.

she then replayed and said that she dont want my money and that its also better that we talk the rest of it tomorrow face to face.

i told her its ok to bring your friend but not every time specially if i tell you that i want us to be alone.

well thats it for now ofc i cant say i believe her about her dont want my money or being the gf of that tomboy but i also cant say im 100% sure that she is.

anyways she did agree tomorrow to come alone without her.

updates tomorrow after the meeting i hope you guys enjoy good entertainment but this is defently not trolling

[nithisa78]

I read enough of these to see there might not be one I'd agree with.

Enjoy your life, go with the flow and let it unfold. I'm aware of similar situations like this. One was mine and it remained platonic...enjoyable...no hidden agenda.

Enjoy your life, I liked seeing it come out in that order. No expectations, no regrets.

You live in different parts of the world, any where, the stage and the scences may change, but the show goes on. BKK, LA. NYC

We're not talking about the bank at Monte Carlo. Have fun. The Land of Smiles.

[nithisa78]

When plant life is green, there is grazing. When it becomes old, it turns into fuel for fire. When it grows and bears fruits, people grab at it with an open hand. Tulsi says that all are friends only when a personal interest is met, but Shri Rama meets the supreme interest.” (Dohavali, 52)

[atyclb]

She is a Lesbian.

Go away from her.

They are both taking advantage of you.

Listen to Costas and you won't regret it.

So what if she is a lesbian, she could still make a good girlfriend.

Do you need somebody to explain the term 'lesbian' to you?

on most days i choose the company of my thai lesbian or gay friends over that of the average thai female. my g/l friends here are outside the box, high IQ, great sense of humor and personality besides having advanced degrees from abroad.

despite what numerous thai experts on tv forum already know, many thai females are/ have been serviced by tomboys even if they have/had otherwise hetero lives. tomboys in many instances are replacements for men. not uncommon for the serviced women to go on to having hetero relationships with men and lose the tomboy.

if the female and her tom friend are nice people and you enjoy each others company and they are not using you financially whats wrong?

Edited March 3, 2015 by atyclb

[thrilled]

1st off the traditional Thai night clubs are just large bars with live music.All types of Thai women go there.The bar girls.

Women that jhave jobs etc.Some women will also make some money on the side along with having A traditional job.

I would say to her you want to take her some place but you want it to be just the 2 of you.If she agrees you'll be fine.

If she say's no I would walk away.Thailand has many pretty single women.

[jdinasia]

Lesbians don't make ideal girlfriends, may have something to do with the fact most of them hate men with a passion.

Lesbians don't hate men. They just aren't attracted to them.

Where do some of you guys get your ideas about women? 1976?

More like 1950 (or they just hate women a la Rush Limbaugh)

[Bigfarang1948]

It is quite obvious she does not want to be aline with you and that she loves her tomboy friend. You are the money man and the extra man, and a farang at that, in the equation. Dump her before she and her girlfriend take all your money....some guys cant see the forest for the tomboy friends....you will always be the odd man out take that as solid advise because your relationship with ms tesco lotus is going nowhere,

Probably better off in Expat Life.

[SoiBiker]

Lesbians don't make ideal girlfriends, may have something to do with the fact most of them hate men with a passion.

Lesbians don't hate men. They just aren't attracted to them.

Where do some of you guys get your ideas about women? 1976?

More like 1950 (or they just hate women a la Rush Limbaugh)

I'm not sure if it's hate or fear.